Chapter 13 - Bridget #2
We finished the day in silence. Nathan glared at his computer like it had insulted him, and Anvi looked even more miserable than I felt. When I stood to leave right at five o’clock, and Nathan looked up like he’d wanted to have another conversation, I didn’t give him the chance.
What I hadn’t admitted, barely even to myself, was how much my professional dismay mingled with worry for a certain subject.
When Andrew had asked me on a date at his last appointment, my brain had short-circuited.
The excuse about it being unprofessional had been a godsend.
But I would have said no, regardless. Even if my brain and body were convinced Andrew should be touching me at all times, an Alpha like him would have…
expectations. Expectations that I could never, ever fulfill.
I’d never even had sex, let alone a proper heat.
So I lied to myself and said it was only my ethical integrity that had me pulling Gabriel’s card from the gala out of my purse.
Of course I’d kept it. It was simple but elegant: his name and phone number on thick cream cardstock, like an old-fashioned calling card.
Did all glamorous Italian men carry these? Or was it a security thing?
It was early evening, not even six o’clock. I needed to contact them early, to convey my professional concerns and avoid it seeming like something different.
I’d also spent the whole train ride home crafting the perfect text.
Hi, it’s Bridget from the study. I have some important information to share with you. Please give me a call at your earliest convenience.
I read the message three times. It was professional, informative, and efficient. Perfect.
As soon as I sent the message, I flung the phone across my room. It landed with a soft thump on my bed. I stared at it from my desk chair, willing it to ring but also terrified that it would.
I didn’t have to wait long. My phone started buzzing just a couple of minutes later.
“Hi.” My voice was too breathless to be mistaken for casual. I hoped he wouldn’t notice.
“Hello ‘Bridget from the study,’” Andrew said, taking me off guard. I’d been expecting Gabriel. The deep, sultry timbre of his voice set me pacing to offset the drop of molten pleasure that settled inside. “Should I be offended, or is that how you text everyone?”
I blushed, but kept my voice steady. “I don’t send many texts, honestly. And I wanted you to know who it was.”
“It was very effective. So, what’s this important information? Gabriel is here, too.”
“Ciao, carissima.”
Since I now knew Andrew was attracted to me, it was easy to read flirtation into everything he said. It was unfair, but then I was the one who had asked them to call me.
I launched into an explanation, leaving out some of the finer scientific details. My heart pounded the whole time, not just because of my audience. This was crossing a line, and I couldn’t take it back. I tried not to think about what Nathan would say if he knew.
“The foundation of the study is wrong. We’re operating under the assumption that these Omega cells are mutable, but that’s not true anymore.
In your knee, the complications probably wouldn’t be dangerous, but with how unpredictable the immune response has been, I’m nervous about how your body will react long term,” I finished.
In the silence that followed, the part of my brain that had been holding onto the secret relaxed, and relief flowed in. My shoulders drifted away from my ears as I resolved to contact the rest of the subjects anonymously, maybe using that fake email I’d created to contact Axion Biostorage.
“Well. This sucks,” Andrew said.
“I will not say I told you so, amore,” Gabriel muttered, then continued, “Thank you, Bridget. I told him before that this treatment would not be a miracle, no matter how much he paid for it.”
My brain snagged.
“Paid for it?” I repeated. I must have heard incorrectly. “This is a research study.”
“Yeah, and Dr. Davis said it would be a hundred grand per injection to take part,” Andrew said, as if this wasn’t a tremendous revelation.
A wave of dizziness rushed over me. “No. That’s so… wrong. None of the other participants are being asked to pay.”
Oh god, what if they were?
I could hear Gabriel muttering darkly in Italian.
“That’s such a huge ethical violation that I kind of feel like I’m going to pass out,” I said. Was I hyperventilating? My short-lived peace of mind evaporated as quickly as it had come. A hundred thousand per injection? If all the subjects were being asked to pay, and if Lisbeth knew…
No wonder she didn’t want the study to be derailed.
“Bridget. Hey. Deep breaths,” Andrew said, dropping his voice into an almost-growl that cut through my panic a bit. I inhaled through my nose and held it for four counts before slowly exhaling.
“I’m sorry, I have to go.” I needed to tell Nathan.
Would he dismiss me, tell me he’d ‘handle it’?
He couldn’t. This was way too big a deal.
The whole study seemed nefarious now, and I felt sick for being a part of it.
Forget cross contamination by the biostorage facility.
This was like a smoking gun, or a smoking flamethrower.
“Wait, carissima,” Gabriel interjected. “Please. You are upset.”
“Of course I am!” I nearly shouted, then glanced towards the door of my room. “Do you understand this is breaking the cardinal rule of scientific integrity? Research has to be objective. A significant financial incentive like this throws any results we might have found into question.”
“How can we help? Should I talk to Patrick?” Andrew asked.
I considered that while Gabriel muttered in Italian, and I fought the panic that threatened to engulf me again.
When this came out, because it definitely would, my career would be ruined before it even started.
Which Ph.D. program would accept me? I’d be toxic — an Omega and an unethical hack.
What the hell was Lisbeth thinking getting involved with someone so willing to compromise scientific integrity?
I also needed to consider Nathan and Anvi. I would have bet my life that neither of them knew about this. Nathan was an overbearing ass, but he wasn’t a hypocrite.
If we wanted to come out of this without looking complicit, we would have to be the ones to blow the whistle. And I needed to talk to them first before we went any further.
“No, please don’t say anything yet. I need to talk to my colleagues first.” My voice was surprisingly steady in the face of impending doom. “And, professionally speaking, I wouldn’t continue treatments.”
“Alright,” Andrew said after a moment. “I feel like I just ruined your night.”
I laughed. There was a hysterical edge to it. “Likewise. But it’s not like I wasn’t already a ball of anxiety.”
“We are here for you, carrissima. Please be careful. I do not like all this secrecy,” Gabriel said.
I promised I would. There was a beat of silence, when I was hoping and dreading in equal measure that Andrew would say something flirtatious, or even ask me out again. But then my shame asserted itself.
“Okay, um, goodnight,” I said.
“Goodnight,” Andrew rumbled, and I hung up before I begged him to say it a few more times, just for the pleasure of hearing his voice.
Sleep would be impossible.