Chapter 38
Thirty-Eight
Only a foolish queen falls in love.
I am a fool.
- King Richard
If they take her from me, I’ll kill the gods to get her back.
I can’t lose her. I couldn’t lose her before, but now that I’ve said the words, now that I’ve given myself permission to believe in our future – I can’t lose her. This vote has to see the monarchy end.
So I debate harder and longer, adding new cities to my tour, trying to make up for the day I missed.
I counter every point the Court makes. I take the time to educate even the morons rather than dismiss them.
I do not sleep the night away, leaving my wife alone in bed.
I work, finding answers to the questions I didn’t know, finding new arguments to sway them.
Until finally, today is the day.
My people are voting.
But despite how much I try to relax in the presence of my queen, a dark restless energy moves inside of me. I need an outlet that she can’t give me.
Which is how I find myself down in the dungeons, inside Kiki’s cell, Tanya’s niece, and the last member of the group of women who tried to assassinate me on my wedding day.
I don’t want to be a monster that Arienna fears, but today, I cannot quiet the hunger.
Not when I’m so terrified of losing her.
My thoughts racing, I step up to Kiki’s naked body. She cowers on the soiled ground, bloody and bruised from her earlier attempt at fighting. Her arms and legs are spread eagle, chained to points on the floor.
“Please,” she begs as she stares up at me, but all I can concentrate on is the fear coiled in my belly.
What if we lose the vote?
What if they order Kiki to be executed on the day of my wife’s coronation?
Kneeling over her, I pull out a box of toothpicks from my pocket.
“Noooo!”
I stab one after the other into the fleshy parts of her body: breasts, stomach, cheek, eyes – all places where they won’t hit bone and snap.
The trick is to slam them in fast and to let go without jerking one’s hand so they stay intact.
If they break, they don’t go in as far and it’s an absolute pain to pull them out.
My mother taught my father how to use them just right. He then taught Seqora and Aurelia while she went off to fight the Alzans. I learned from watching them practice.
But I’ll never teach Arienna.
Eventually, Kiki stops screaming. The hours pass, but still I work, trying to kill the thoughts roaring in my head.
What if I haven’t done enough to convince them?
What if Petre is planning something?
The Court has been terrifyingly silent. Evangeline hasn’t uncovered any plan. There’s been no whispers of a violent coup. People are just waiting for the outcome of this fucking vote. And life, dammit, life feels too damn good.
Everything is so close in my grasp, and I can’t shake this horrible feeling that I’m about to lose it all. Nothing good ever survives Raza.
I stab another toothpick in Kiki’s stomach; she cries.
By gods, do I understand my ex’s abhorrence to patience in this moment.
I half wish I hadn’t stopped her from using my wife to infiltrate the coup.
Or from charging Dragons Coo, Chi, and Tanya with some made-up crime.
But none of their seconds are any better than they are; I would just be moving the problem down the line and stirring up a wasp’s nest of mistrust and fear.
All we can do is wait for this damn vote.
Finished with the toothpicks, I pull out a piece of sand paper that’s been magically spelled to never clog. As I start to sand in-between her toes, having just finished the soles of her feet, a voting official approaches the cell. She first hands out cards to my guards, then steps inside.
“Apologies, Your Majesty,” she says as I turn around. “But if I could have a moment with Kiki, I can get her vote.”
“Of course.” Stepping back, I gesture to her.
Pulling out a card, she approaches the girl. “Hello, sorry to interrupt, but I just need you to fill out this…” She trails off as she notices all of the toothpicks spitting out of her fingernails. “Ah. I shall ask you the questions instead, and you can answer verbally.”
“Fuck… you,” Kiki wheezes.
“You will answer her,” I say coldly.
“Or what?” she snorts. “You’ll throw me in jail? Torture me?”
“Yes. Your favourite book is Eliva Forgotten. I will hire the worst actors and the worst screenwriter to butcher it on the screen. Then I will carve off your eyelids and force you to watch it on repeat for weeks. And just when you start to get used to it, I’ll create another adaption, this time even worse.
Repeating and repeating. Then you will die with no memory of how good Eliva Forgotten actually is. ”
Her eyes widen in horror. Looking at the official, she nods quickly.
“Thank you,” the woman says. “Your cooperation is much appreciated. So the first question: Do you understand that by abolishing the monarchy, you will be required to learn everything about politics yourself, which could cut into your down time?”
My eyes narrow. An uncomfortable coil starts tightening in my stomach.
“Yes,” Kiki says.
“Do you understand that with this new system, everyone, including all the idiots, gets a chance to vote?”
Fucking hel. Is this Petre’s play, or is this just a terrible luck of the draw? Both I and the Court wrote hundreds of yes and no questions for them to choose from. Supposedly at random.
“Yes.”
She checks the box on the card. “Do you understand that this isn’t a trap set by King Morningstar to gather a list of names of those who hate him, so he can kill them later when he doesn’t abdicate the throne as promised?”
“That question –” I start to cut in on a rage.
“King Morningstar!” the official says loudly. “The rules specifically state that no one can be bothered while they are in the voting process in order to not manipulate their vote.”
My jaw tightens. “But that question –”
“Is one of the officially listed questions. Some of them are true. Some of them are false. But you cannot give the voter any knowledge while they’re answering these questions so that we may know whether or not they understand what they are voting on.
If you interrupt again, by decree of King Morningstar, you will be thrown in jail. ”
Seething in silence at the injustice of these questions, I cross my arms and wait.
She smiles tightly before turning back to Kiki. “Do you need me to repeat the question?”
“No,” she says. “I understand.”
“Good. Now, I just need a fingerprint and some of your DNA to make sure there aren’t any duplicate votes.
” She looks at her tortured hands again.
Hesitates for a second, then bends down, and very crisply, places the card under a bleeding finger.
“There we go, got two in one. So,” she says as she straightens, “how would you like to vote?”
Kiki doesn’t look at me. “I vote for Richard to stay king.”
I frown.
“Thanks!” The official marks down her vote.
“Wait a second,” I say, stepping in front of her so she can’t leave. “Kiki, your answer will not impact your torture. Are you sure –”
“King Morningstar!” the official interrupts. “The rules specifically state that no one can intimidate someone into voting a certain way. By decree of King Morningstar, I’m going to have to place you under arrest.”
My eyes narrow, causing her to swallow hard. “I’m not intimidating her. I’m trying to make sure she isn’t being intimidated by her current situation.”
She takes a step back and accidentally crushes Kiki’s fingers. “Well… um… okay then.”
After Kiki is finished screaming, the official asks her, “Do you wish to change your vote after this new information?”
“No.”
My hands clench into fists, but I don’t say a word. It is one vote. It won’t matter when stacked up against the others.
As the official leaves the cell, having taken my vote too, I pick up the piece of sandpaper.
It’s just one vote, I tell myself as I start rubbing her little toe. It won’t make a difference.
I start on the next one.
But think about how dumb the average person is…
Another toe turns red.
Half the populace is even dumber than that.
I rub so hard, I reveal bone.
Fuck.
How many hours until the vote is in?