9. Chapter 9
Mermaid Motel
Smuggler’s Hideaway
Dear Ben,
Are you reading this while eating a cookie?
Or did you break the sacred rules of care package opening and read this letter first?
If so, just remember – I know how to make a glitter bomb.
And I’ve recently become friends with a woman who is a chemistry whizz.
(Paisley is awesome. She pranked her enemy with red dye.) You have been warned.
But seriously - do you have an address for your parents?
I feel the need to kick their asses. How dare they cut you out of their lives because you joined the Army!
You’re a hero. You deserve to board planes first, be revered on Veterans’ Day, and get discounts at restaurants.
(We have a twenty-percent discount for veterans at the Mermaid Motel.
Hint. Hint. Nudge. Nudge.) What you don’t deserve is how they’ve treated you.
I truly am sorry. And am standing by with my glitter at the ready. Just say the word.
I know you’re right about my parents. (But tell anyone I said that and you can forget itching powder, I’m going straight to glitter bombing). I need to be patient with them. Something horrible happened to my mom in college and my dad is very protective of her and his girls.
I understand where he’s coming from and I love him for how much he worries but assault isn’t the only way for a man to hurt a woman. I could never be with a man like Warren who doesn’t respect me or my gender.
Anyway, I do respect you and I totally respect your service to our country. Which is why I sent the care package. Also, it gave me an excuse to visit Pirates Pastries, which has the best Blackbeard’s Revenge Cookies you will ever taste. What do you think? Heaven in a cookie, am I right?
I nearly forgot to answer your mermaid question. You are so silly. This is Smuggler’s Hideaway, where smugglers are sexy, mermaids are real, and seals are wild animals. They shouldn’t be touched. It’s a great place to visit. ??
But seriously, the island is full of mermaid legends.
One legend has it a mermaid fell in love with a smuggler.
They could only spend brief moments together as she couldn’t stay on land for long and he couldn’t stay in the water (obviously!).
One day, another mermaid came to the smuggler and promised him he could stay in the water with his mermaid lover forever.
All he had to do was dive into the ocean.
Unbeknownst to the smuggler, his mermaid lover paid a visit to a witch.
In exchange for her mortality, she was given legs to live on land.
But when she arrived on the island, she discovered her smuggler had drowned in the ocean.
She committed suicide by diving into the ocean from the highest cliff on the island.
There’s a statue there to commemorate their love. It’s right next to Mermaid Mystical Gardens – an amusement park with nautical themed rides. You’ll love it!
Anyway, I really hope you like your care package. Don’t forget to wear the socks!
Stay safe soldier boy,
Sadie