Chapter 30
Dax
I ’m dreading today. I haven’t seen or spoken to my father since Cedric’s birthday—outside of the text he sent about expecting me home for Thanksgiving.
Having a big meal with him and then sleeping over isn’t my idea of fun.
There’s not a chance in hell it’s his either.
The only reason he’s doing it is because of Cedric, so why do we pretend otherwise?
Miles rubs his dick against my ass, making soft, waking-up sounds, his hand running up and down my chest. “Why is it morning already?” he asks.
“The universe hates us?” I tease.
“You’re not supposed to be the pessimist in this relationship. You’re the sunshine. I’m the storm.”
I roll over to face him. “I like storms.”
He gives me a small smile, then kisses me. The second he pulls away, I have this thought…and I wonder why I didn’t consider it before. Maybe because I never had someone I wanted to bring home? “Come with me.”
“Huh?”
“Come with me. Today. We always have a shit ton of food. He hires someone to come in and cook. There will be plenty.”
He tenses. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know that being good with parents is gonna be my thing. I’m not great with people in general, so I can’t imagine I’d magically wind up being amazing with a boyfriend’s parents.”
“My dad is shit with me, so who cares?” I tease, trying to lighten the mood.
I run my fingers through his hair, playing with the strands.
“You’ll be great. I love being around you.
I don’t want to be without you today, and I don’t want you to be alone either.
You deserve to be with someone who cares about you today. Come with me.”
Miles brushes his nose against mine, hand now tangled in my hair too. “You care about me?”
“Maybe a little,” I joke, before getting serious. “Maybe a lot.”
Miles sighs, but I hear the resolve in it, know that he’s coming around because even if Miles doesn’t see it, not only is he good at being a boyfriend, at being someone’s friend too, but he’s lonely. He doesn’t want to be alone, and I’ll do anything in my power so he’s not.
“Please.” I flutter my lashes. “I’ll make it worth your while.”
He cocks a brow. “Oh yeah? How will you do that?”
“I’ll give you a hint: it has something to do with my ass.”
“How can I turn that down?”
“Really?” I grin, happier about this than I realized I would be.
He shrugs as if it’s not a big deal. “That’s what boyfriends do, right?”
“It is.”
I kiss him, and we get out of bed. Miles goes into the bathroom and starts the shower. I take a minute to text Cedric, letting him know Miles is coming with me and asking him to make sure Dad knows.
Cedric: You’re really serious about this guy, aren’t you?
Me: I am. More serious than I’ve ever been about anyone.
Cedric: I must admit, I was nervous at first, but as long as he treats you well, that’s what matters. I’m happy for you.
Me: Thanks, Ced. That means the world to me. How is he today?
Cedric: In a bad mood. Who knows why. I’m trying to avoid him. Hey, do you know where our birth certificates are? I need to get my passport. Dad’s pissed I’ll be taking time off, but I’m going on a trip to Europe with friends in the fall.
Cedric never does anything for himself, he’s always in Dad’s pocket, so I love the thought of him doing something that’s just for him. He deserves a trip with his friends. It’ll do him good to have some distance from Dad and his expectations.
Me: I think he keeps that shit in his office. Good luck! And good for you. The trip sounds fun.
I stick my phone on the charger, then join Miles.
He kisses me as soon as I’m in the shower with him, pressing me against the wall, rutting his cock against mine and jerking us off.
I’m not proud to admit it only takes me about two point five seconds to come, Miles teasing me about being a quick trigger this morning, before I get on my knees and blow him.
It’s not long before he’s giving me a nice shot of morning protein, and then he’s washing me and taking care of me in this way I never knew I liked and that I never expected from him.
“So…I might want to kick your dad’s ass today,” he says when we’re in his car, heading to Atlanta.
I laugh. “Can’t say I’d blame you. He deserves it, but maybe we can try and refrain from violence.”
“Hey, you’re the one who wanted me to come,” he jokes.
I know he’s only teasing. Miles is a lot of things, and yes, he struggles with his temper, but I’ve also seen the changes in him, seen him letting this lighter side out to play more often. He’s kind and bighearted and wants so much to feel loved.
“Why are you being all weird today?” he asks.
I chuckle. “Is wanting to spend time with my boyfriend and having him meet my brother and asshole father weird?” Though I’d told Cedric about the fire and what went down last year, and there’s overlap between his time at Peach State and Miles’s, they’d never met.
Heard about each other, sure, but they don’t know one another.
“When your boyfriend is me? Yes.”
“Stop talking about my boyfriend that way. Let’s play a game.”
“Are we twelve?”
“No, we’re fun.”
He humors me, and we play silly car games while we drive to my father’s house. I feel less tense than I have coming home in a long time.
When it comes to my dad, I always feel confusion and frustration, and while I’ve accepted this is the way things are, I still wish I could understand why . What is it about me that makes it so hard for him to love me?
“You okay?” Miles asks, reading my mood.
“Yeah. Just always dread going home. It’s easier this time, though.”
“I have that much power, huh?”
“You do, but I’ll never admit it again.”
We pull off the highway, and I give him directions to my father’s house. “Holy shit,” he says when we pull out front.
“Ridiculous, isn’t it?”
“I thought I came from money, but this is on another level.”
“I try not to act like a spoiled douchebag.”
He cocks a brow. “Only a douchebag would use the word douchebag .”
“Good point.”
I go to open the car door, but Miles stops me. “You good?” he asks, and I feel the smile in my chest before it makes its way to my lips.
“I am. Thanks for coming.”
“Just doing my boyfriendy duty,” he teases before kissing me, and like always, Miles’s kisses make me almost giddy. Who knew having sex or touching someone you have feelings for was so much better? Any kind of intimacy has always been great to me, but it’s even better with him.
We get out of the car, and I take his hand, holding it as we approach the large, Tudor-style house.
I’m so distracted with having Miles with me, I don’t knock like I usually do when I come home. I didn’t text Cedric first either, so he’s not waiting for me, playing buffer.
I close the door behind us, and just before I call out Cedric’s name, I hear him yell, “ What the fuck is this, Dad? ”
Great. Is my father making a big deal about Miles coming with me?
I probably should have checked in again with Cedric, but fuck that.
Shouldn’t a parent want to meet their child’s boyfriend?
Doesn’t it make him happy that I’m sticking with one guy instead of acting slutty, something he’s accused me of more than once?
“ It’s none of your business! ” Dad shouts back.
The two of them rarely fight, and when they do, it’s always about me. What could I have done before I even arrived, unless it has to do with Miles? If my father doesn’t want to meet my boyfriend, then he’s not going to spend the holiday with me either. We’re a package deal.
“Happy Thanksgiving,” I tease Miles. I’m about to head down the hallway toward my dad’s office, where the voices are coming from, when they continue.
“This says Dax isn’t…”
My heart stumbles. Dax isn’t what ? What did I do ?
“Hey, maybe we should…” Miles says softly.
“Shh.”
I step closer to the partly open door.
“My son. No.”
Dizziness hits me, nearly knocking me off my feet.
I’m not his son? What the fuck is he talking about? For whatever fucking reason, he doesn’t love me like a son, but that doesn’t make me not his.
“That doesn’t make sense,” Cedric says.
“I assure you, it does. The DNA results you dug out of my locked desk drawer tell you right there. Why were you going through my things?”
“I was looking for my birth certificate.” There’s a pause between them where I wonder what’s happening, and then my brother’s voice is softer, sadder when he asks, “How did you find out? How long have you known?”
I should say something. I should let them know I’m here or turn around and walk out, but I can’t make myself do either. I’m not his son. How could I not be his son? I can’t process this. Cedric is older, and he’s Dad’s son, right? Or maybe neither of us is?
Miles’s hand tightens on mine, offering support, tugging me closer like he doesn’t want me to hear this, but I can’t move. I need to know what he’s talking about.
“I’ve always known…or rather, since right after he was born.
Your mother cheated on me. She almost left me, but she didn’t know if he was mine or…
We did a DNA test, but the man she was in love with left her.
He didn’t want a child, and I didn’t want a scandal or public embarrassment, so she stayed, and I raised him as my own. ”
I shake my head, pull my hand from Miles’s and cover my ears as if that will change what I already heard, as if, if I don’t hear anymore, it won’t be true.
How can any of this be true? He’s lying.
He must be. My mother would never do that.
She loved him, loved all of us. She was honest and good and fuck him for making this shit up. I drop my hands, needing to hear more.
“You’re lying,” Cedric says, plucking the thought from my head.
“Don’t act like a child, Cedric. It doesn’t suit you. Clearly, I’m not lying. Now if you’ll excuse me—”
“Why didn’t anyone tell him?” my brother cuts him off.