Chapter 28
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Marisol sat alone in the kitchen, her head spinning. She knew it couldn’t have been from blood loss. The incision on her chest was barely an inch wide and relatively shallow. Though she admitted that having eaten very little over the last three days, and losing her hydration regimen was probably making things worse.
Closing her eyes longer than strictly necessary for blinking, Marisol pictured her bag full of snacks stuffed into the drawer in the ER. With an ache in her chest, she accepted that she’d never go back there again. If nothing else, how would she ever explain why she absconded with a patient in the middle of her shift without a word?
Marisol pressed her pendant to her chest, letting the cold metal against her skin reassure her. Her routine was a comfort, but she couldn’t deny that she wanted more than anything to understand who she was. It was worth the trade off.
The edge of the bandage on her chest was rough under her fingertip. If she didn’t have evidence of the experience carved into her skin, she wouldn’t believe it happened. It had been so surreal, so… hot .
The thought of behaving like a cat in heat horrified her, but she couldn’t deny the lingering feeling of Elena’s touch on her waist and Zuri’s lips on her neck. All she’d wanted was more. Was it supposed to be like that?
Thinking about how good it would have felt if Elena had pulled her shirt down further, she imagined her full lips on her skin. Could almost feel her tongue swirling around her nipple.
Jesus . Marisol shifted to ease the rush of desire that pulled at her again. Get a grip .
Movement in her periphery dragged her attention to the fridge. To the small lizard skittering across the floor and out the open doorway of the kitchen.
“Oh no, little guy, how’d you get in here?”
She stood, grabbing the broom and dustpan hanging by the back door. Grateful for the distraction from existential confusion and stress-induced arousal, she followed the lizard.
Moving slowly, she tracked it until it slipped into the tiny gap between one of Zuri’s bookshelves and the wall. “Damn it.”
Looking up from her book, Elena regarded her with dark eyes. Eyes that seemed to peel off every thread of Marisol’s tank and shorts.
Marisol ignored her. Lust still lingered low in her belly, and she didn’t trust herself not to make a mistake. Not to straddle her sexy hips and beg her to bite her. To do whatever the hell she wanted with her.
Zuri was so insistent about Elena not biting either of them. She trusted that it was for a reason. Spiky as she was, Marisol didn’t get the sense that Zuri was full of shit. Elena, on the other hand, seemed like the kind of person who never told the whole truth. Who had too easy a time convincing people to make terrible choices.
“What are you doing?” Elena’s voice sang with her amusement at watching Marisol squat down, trying in vain to see behind the bookshelf.
“Catching a lizard so I can take it outside,” she replied without looking back at her.
“Why?” Elena’s curiosity was a wild spark, and she imagined her being the sort of kid that kicked ant piles to watch them scramble.
Marisol stood, eyebrows raised in open judgment. “Because the AC will kill it. It’s too cold in here.”
Blinking at her, Elena’s smile only bloomed on one side of her dangerously beautiful face. The expression made Marisol’s blood warm against her will. She could still feel Elena’s lips on her chest. Her tongue running along her skin. Her blood, bright red and alluring on her lips.
“Survival of the fittest, baby,” Elena decided after a beat. “If it couldn’t survive in here, then it shouldn’t have slipped in through a crack.”
Narrowing her eyes, Marisol glared. “It’s a living thing and it’s not harming you. Why would you want it to die?”
Elena moistened her lips as if to remind her she was a predator. That she was a loaded gun. A pointed blade.
“It’s not that I want it to die.” Her voice was low and seductive, slipping into Marisol’s shorts to find her lingering desire. “It’s that I don’t care if it lives.”
“That’s basically the same thing,” Marisol shot back, anticipation awakening her muscles.
Elena tipped her head to the side, watching Marisol. Studying her with endless interest. “Markedly different things. If I wanted it dead, it would be dead.”
“Just like that?” Marisol drifted closer to Elena. She wanted to turn away. To tell her she didn’t believe in killing anything.
“Does that scare you?” Elena’s voice was dripping with every dirty thought Marisol had ever had. She was the fingers she slipped into her underwear when she just couldn’t find any other way to sleep. The darkest fantasies Marisol would never let out of the confines of mind. “Do I scare you?”
“No,” she lied, because she couldn’t explain exactly what was triggering her heart to race against her rib cage.
“Are you sure?” Elena beckoned her closer with nothing but a look and the way she parted her legs, inviting Marisol to straddle them again.
Holding her breath, Marisol had to tell herself that it was stupid to kiss her again. That despite how very much she wanted to taste her, she shouldn’t. Right? No. She definitely shouldn’t. It had been reckless once and insane twice. God, why did she want to?
The back door in the kitchen opened, stopping Marisol’s terrible judgment from gaining traction.
“Come on, Bambi,” Zuri said, pulling Marisol back to her body. “I have an idea.”
Eager not to make a mistake, Marisol followed Zuri out of the house, her gaze lingering on Zuri’s curves while she walked fast in front of her.
Really? Out of the frying pain and desperate to find the fire?
She forced herself to look away from her, shielding her eyes from the afternoon sun and looking at a tree in the distance. There was no way she was going to let herself think about Zuri’s lips on her neck, or how good her arm felt around her. Nope.
They walked in silence, the crunch of gravel beneath their feet the only noise. Zuri led her to a small clearing under ancient oak trees, where sunlight dappled the earth. A tiny man-made pond lay still, its dark water filled with plants.
“This is one place that helps me feel closest to my power,” Zuri said before producing a tartan blanket Marisol hadn’t noticed. “Water and life together are kind of my thing,” she added, eyes avoiding Marisol’s in a way that made her regret having pulled her closer.
Accepting that she couldn’t change what had happened that morning, she took a deep breath and tried to be present. The air was thick with the scent of damp earth and blooming jasmine, a calming fragrance that eased the tension in her shoulders.
Zuri sat and gestured for Marisol to sit across from her. “I’ve been trying to figure out how to explain it,” she said, her brow furrowed in concentration. “How I access people’s memories. It’s not like reading a book, more like... projecting myself into their minds. Becoming a part of their experience.”
Marisol nodded and wished she understood. “Maybe if you can put it into words? I can try to follow?”
“Imagine a golden thread,” Zuri said, her voice low and steady.
Closing her eyes, she visualized Elena broken and unconscious in the hospital. Tried to remember every detail from the trauma room.
“A thread that connects me to the person whose memories I want to access. I reach out with my mind, feel for that thread, and gently pull it towards me.”
Trying to follow her instructions, she imagined a thread, shimmering with light, extending from her hands when she approached Elena. Let it mix with how badly she’d wanted her to wake up. To give her a chance.
Marisol’s heart strained against her chest, her stomach tight and muscles tense. She reached out, her pulse pounding behind her eyes. She tried so hard she forgot to breathe, but she felt nothing. No connection, no spark, no thread.
She opened her eyes, disappointment dropping her shoulders. “I don’t feel anything,” she admitted, letting her irritation show.
Zuri nodded, her expression surprisingly understanding. “It takes practice.”
They tried again, and again, but Marisol couldn’t summon her power at will. The frustration gnawed at her, making her feel inept and useless.
As the afternoon wore on, Zuri’s patience waned. “Let’s take a break,” she said before standing. She didn’t wait for Marisol to agree before she was already walking away.
Marisol laid back on the blanket instead of following her. Eyes closed, she cried on her own so that Zuri didn’t have to be subjected to her failure and her emotions.