Devotion - Chapter 12 #2
I thought about that for a second. "And even that makes me a little nervous. I'm worried he's going to change his mind at the last minute and not show up. I know it's ridiculous. But you know, like if he realizes he's making a mistake again."
"I don't think you have to worry about that," Melissa said. "James has been obsessed with you ever since you first met. He wanted to marry you as soon as you moved to New York. The only reason it took this long was because you wanted to graduate first."
"I know." I shrugged my shoulders. "It's still scary."
"Mason would never let him skip town," Bee said. "I actually made him promise not to lose track of him tonight after what happened this morning. I got your back, girl."
I laughed. "Thanks. I have no idea why I'm nervous, I just am. I feel like my stomach is filled with butterflies."
"That's why you should be drinking with us," Jen said and raised her glass.
"No way. I don't want to have a hangover for my wedding."
"I sure do."
I laughed. "Okay, Jen. Truth or dare," I said.
"Since everyone is being super lame, dare!"
"I knew you'd say that. I dare you to ask Ian on a date tomorrow."
"Ian? As in, your driver Ian?"
"What other Ian would I be talking about?"
She laughed and took a sip of her drink. "Ian's not interested in me. Besides, even if he was, I live on the other side of the country. And it would just never work."
"See. You didn't say anything about not liking him ."
"Of course I like him. He's sweet and funny. And he always goes out of his way to help me. But that's his job. He doesn't like me like that."
"Trust me, he likes you."
"Did he say that?"
"You should hear how excited he gets whenever you're coming to visit."
"Stop messing with me, Penny."
"I'm serious! Besides, you have to ask him out tomorrow. You can't break a dare."
"Fine, I'll ask him. But he's going to say no. And then I'll be mortified and never be able to come back to New York."
"He's going to say yes and then you'll be the first ones running about with grandchildren for your parents."
Daphne laughed. "Good. That was too much pressure for me."
We all laughed.
"Geez, kids," Bee said. "I can't even picture that right now. That seems like a million years away. We should seriously all plan to have kids at the same time. They can all grow up and be best friends too."
"I'm not even dating anyone," Melissa said.
"It sounded like Matt wanted to change that," Jen said.
"Matt isn't interested in a relationship.
He just wants sex. It seems like that's all anyone ever wants with me.
Tyler and I lasted for like 5 seconds. I don't even know how to be in a relationship anymore.
I really liked him. I thought...God I don't know what I thought.
He was such a nice guy. And even he just used me. I'm such an idiot."
I knew that Tyler didn't use Melissa for sex. He did like her. He just didn't love her. It still hurt to think that Tyler wouldn't be at my wedding tomorrow. And it hurt to know that he was hurting and Melissa was hurting and it was all because of me.
"I'm so sorry," I said. "Melissa, I know you said you didn't want to talk about it, but..."
"I'm not mad at you. It's not your fault. It's me. Everyone always leaves me. I have some internal flaw that disgusts people or something."
Daphne laughed.
Melissa glared at her.
"I mean, Melissa, I know I don't know you very well. But couldn't your flaw be that you expect everyone to leave you? So maybe you push them away a little bit?"
"I don't think I do that. Do I do that?" she looked at me.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know. Do you?"
She bit her lip.
"I'm sorry," Daphne said. "It's just that I've always been terrified of losing people. So I stopped getting close to people. And if you're doing that too, you should stop. You're going to miss out on someone great if you don't."
"Maybe I push people away. I don't know if it's that exactly. I don't mind being alone. I'm kick ass at being single."
"Here's to that," Jen said.
"I'm just worried about getting hurt. I'm defensive. I hate feeling like I'm not in control of a situation."
"Sounds pretty similar to me," Bee said. "I think you should give Matt a chance. I know him better than you guys because he is literally at our apartment all the freaking time. He has a sweet side just like Rob. You just have to dig a little deeper."
"I think that's true," Daphne said. "Obviously I don't know him as well as any of you. But Rob told me that Matt gets sad at weddings. Because it reminds him that he's alone."
"Matt seriously said that?" Melissa asked.
"That's what Rob said."
"Hm."
"Whose turn is it? Jen?" I asked.
"Guilty," she said.
"Dare Melissa to hang out with Matt tomorrow."
"Too obvious," Jen said. "I'm pretty sure she's going to do that anyway now that she knows he's not a mindless sex robot."
Melissa laughed. "Yeah, maybe."
"Do you want a dare?" Jen asked.
"Sure, why not?" Melissa said.
"Okay. Then I dare you to go find out Porter's first name. And do whatever it takes." She winked.
"I'm not going to give the security guard a blowjob to figure out his first name."
"Oh, please, Melissa, I'm dying to know!" I said.
"Ew. Then you go blow him." She tossed a pillow at me.
I laughed. "I'm going to go tell him to come in here."
"Don't you dare!" Melissa shrieked when I stood up. "I'll go out there and ask by myself. No sexual favors. I'm just going to ask."
"At least pull your shirt down," Jen said.
"And your shorts up," Bee added.
Daphne laughed. "I'm so glad I keep picking truth."
Melissa opened up the hotel door and stepped out, closing it behind her. We all watched the door, especially after a few minutes had passed. Finally she came back in.
"Did he tell you?" I asked.
"Maybe."
"Shut up, he did not," Jen said. "I swear the only person that knows is James. And I guess Porter's mother."
"You're right, he didn't. And just for the record, I was very flirtatious."
"Fine. I guess you met your dare." Jen laughed.
"Truth or dare?" Melissa said and pointed at me.
"Now I kind of want to pick dare just to see what you'll come up with. But I'm going with truth because I don't want to do whatever crazy thing you would come up with."
"So lame."
"Fine, fine. Dare."
"I dare you to go up to the roof."
"Of the building?"
"Yeah."
I laughed. "Why?"
"I don't have to have a reason. It's a dare."
"Can you even get on the roof of this hotel? I told James I'd stay in the room."
Melissa started making chicken noises and flapped her arms.
I laughed. "You look ridiculous. Come on, just make me do something else."
"The dare has already been announced," Bee said. "Technically you have to do it now."
"Will you guys at least come with me?"
"Nah," Jen said. "You got this."
"I'll come if you want," Daphne said.
"Thanks, that would be..."
"Nope," Melissa said. "You have to go alone."
"Why?"
She laughed. "Sometimes you're so clueless. It's exactly midnight. All of us are trying to get you to the roof. And we're all refusing to go with you. Think about it." She winked at me.
I smiled. "James is up there?"
"Don't tell him I ruined it. Blame it on Daphne."
"What? I didn't even know." She laughed.
"What's he doing up there?"
"I don't know. He just sent us all a text a half hour ago about how we needed to get you on the roof at midnight.
And I didn't want to risk going up there with you in case he's naked or something.
Not that the sight wouldn't be great. It would just be hard to hang out with him after I saw how he was hanging. "
I laughed. "He's very well-endowed."
Jen put her hands over her ears. "Gross! Stop talking now."
I laughed.
"It's very tempting to text Ian while you're gone." She reached over and grabbed her phone off the nightstand. "But someone should probably stop me because I am officially drunk."
I grabbed her phone and tossed it at Melissa.
"I'll let you guys handle that while I'm gone.
I'll be right back." I tied the sash around my new robe and walked over to the door.
Bee had given it to me right when we got to the hotel.
It was silky and said bride on the back. It was the most comfortable thing ever.
"Sure," Melissa said. She stretched the word out tauntingly. "You're never right back when it comes to James. And if you two uncontrollable love birds are banging, it'll be like an hour."
Jen put her hands back over her ears as I stepped out in the hall. Porter immediately stood up from the chair he was sitting on.
"You don't have to get up," I said. "I'm meeting James on the roof."
"Yes, ma'am. He asked me to escort you."
"Oh. Okay, then. Thanks, Porter."
He nodded.
As we made our way to the elevator he kept trying to walk behind me. So I kept slowing down, trying to get him to walk beside me. Maybe I imagined it, but I thought I saw him smile briefly.
He hit the elevator button for me and folded his arms.
"So what's your first name?"
He looked down at me. "I'd prefer to keep this professional."
The doors dinged and we both stepped onto the elevator.
"I know. It would just make me more comfortable if I could use your real name. Like if there's an emergency and I need to call your name. Your full name would get your attention better."
"Porter will do just fine." There was a small smile at the corner of his mouth again. There was no denying it this time.
"Sorry about Melissa earlier."
"It's fine. She was just asking me random security questions. I thought you were checking up on me to see if I was qualified. I assure you that I am."
"She didn't ask you what your first name was?"
"No, ma'am."
Melissa! I should have known she didn't ask him for his first name. The doors dinged open to another floor. "How do we get to the roof?"
"Right this way," he said and stepped out of the elevator.
I followed him toward a set of stairs. "How did you and James meet?" I asked.