Untouchable - Chapter 18 #2
There was no way to say he stole the kiss this time.
I’d initiated it. Maybe I did it because I was still scared.
Maybe it was because I was drunk. There were a million ways I could describe my actions away.
But I was pretty sure the truth was that I wanted this.
Him. I wasn’t dangling from a banister or being eaten by a vampire.
I was alive. And I wanted to be alive with him.
His hands felt like fire as they trailed down the sides of my body, pulling me against him.
“You’re mine,” he said against my lips.
I breathed in his cinnamon exhales. I didn’t push him away this time.
I didn’t tell him to stop. I didn’t call him a thief.
But he was most certainly a thief. Because he was trying really hard to steal my heart.
And in that silent room, just the two of us breathing hard, it felt real. It felt like falling in love.
“Is Matt in there?” A female’s voice drifted beneath the wooden door.
“Shit,” Matt said and released me from his embrace.
“Nope,” Rob said much louder than the girl was speaking. “Pretty sure he’s downstairs! Matt is definitely not in his bedroom!”
“Why are you shouting? And why are you holding the doorknob?” She knocked. “Matt, are you in there?”
Matt grabbed my hand, pulling me farther into the dark room. “You need to hide,” he hissed.
“What?” I pulled my hand out of his.
“Please. I’ll explain everything in a minute.” He opened a closet door.
“You’re not serious?”
“Matt, I know you’re in there!” There was pounding on the door. “Let me in!”
“I promise.” He grabbed my face in his hands. “Just…please, Brooklyn. I swear I’ll tell you everything as soon as she leaves. I need you to trust me.”
I could just make out his features in the darkness. I had never seen him look worried before. Something was wrong. Really wrong. I heard the click of the door opening.
“Matt?” the girl was definitely in the room now. Now that I could hear her better, her voice sounded so familiar.
“Told you he’s not in there,” Rob said, his voice clear now too.
“Where the hell is the light switch?” she asked.
I wanted to trust Matt. But the kiss we just shared was the only reason I stepped back into his closet.
I was holding on to that moment instead of all the other ones.
Like when he’d let Charlotte make fun of me in class.
Or when he ignored me in the halls. Or when he scared me half to death in that auditorium and then again tonight. I didn’t trust him. But I wanted to.
Matt closed the door behind me. The light turned on a second later and I could see his bedroom clearly through a crack.
A huge four-poster bed was in the center of the room.
I thought there’d be decorations or posters or something that screamed him.
But it just looked like the rest of the house.
Dark red wallpaper. Cold. Creepy. My thoughts trailed off when Isabella came into view.
It felt like the blood in my veins turned to ice.
“Oh, my bad,” Rob said. “Guess he is. I’ll just leave you two alone then…I guess?”
“You can stay,” Matt said.
But at the same time Isabella said, “We actually need a moment alone.” Then she glared toward the door where I assumed Rob was still standing.
“Right. I will catch you two later then,” Rob said and left, the door closing behind him.
I closed my eyes. This wasn’t happening. I wanted to wake up. I pinched myself but it just hurt and I was still standing in a closet.
“What are you doing up here?” Isabella asked, stepping closer to Matt. “The party’s downstairs.”
He cleared his throat. “Changing. I spilled something on myself.” Some of the stains from my dress had transferred onto his shirt. “I’ll be right back down.”
“I’ll wait.” She sat on the edge of his bed and crossed her legs. Her skirt was so short that if it rode up any more she’d be flashing him her underwear.
Matt glanced toward his closet. Me. And then back at her.
He pulled off his t-shirt. I’d never seen him without a shirt before.
And for a moment, I forgot that Isabella was sitting on his bed and I was hiding.
Because his abs? If I wasn’t so mad at him I probably would have been drooling.
He grabbed another t-shirt from a drawer.
“You know,” Isabella said and stood up, grabbing Matt’s hand that was holding his shirt. “The party’s kinda lame. Did you know that Rachel is here? It’s so humiliating for me. Her throwing herself all over James in front of all my friends. Doesn’t he know how that looks?”
“He probably thinks it looks like he’s dating her. Because she’s his girlfriend.”
“That’s not how everyone else sees it and you know it. Rachel doesn’t belong here. She’s not even smart enough to get a scholarship to Empire High. She attends public school. Public. School. It’s sad, really. I’d pity her if she wasn’t so horribly annoying.”
“We’re not at a party with our parents, Wizzy. James doesn’t have to pretend to like you here. Cut the bullshit.”
She huffed. “How many times do I have to ask you to stop calling me that? And you know I don’t like it when you curse around me.” She put her lower lip out like she was a child.
Gross.
“If you don’t like the way I talk you can leave.”
She sighed. “No. I don’t think I can face seeing anyone else tonight. You know what would make me feel better? Hiding out up here.”
Matt glanced over at the closet again. I was pretty sure he couldn’t see me. Did he know I could see him?
He cleared his throat. “I’d rather go back downstairs.”
“Are you sure? I could think of a lot of things we could do right here.” She sat down on his bed again and I tried not to vomit all over the thousand dollar tuxes hanging in his closet.
“Maybe later. Right now, I was hoping we could…dance.”
Dance?
Isabella smiled. “Now that sounds fun. Do you have any music up here?”
“I meant downstairs.” He pulled on his fresh shirt.
“Oh. Well, I guess I could use another drink too.” She stood back up and walked over to him. “But you have to promise to dance with me the rest of the night so I don’t look like a fool. Or else I might make a scene with Rachel and that would really ruin James’ night.”
“One dance,” Matt said.
“Oh, Matt.” She pressed her index finger against his lips. “I wasn’t asking.” She trailed her finger down, pulling at his bottom lip. “Dance with me the rest of the night. I’ll make it worth your while like always.”
He didn’t say a word. I held my breath. Waiting for his response. What did she mean when she said, “I’ll make it worth your while like always.” Why was she touching him? Why wasn’t he pushing her away? I stared at Matt, willing him to tell her to leave. To kick her out of his freaking bedroom.
Instead, he nodded his head.
“There. That wasn’t so hard, was it?” She grabbed his hand. “Tonight is going to be so much fun now.” She pulled him toward the door and then the lights went out.
For a second tonight, I hadn’t felt like a dirty secret. But now? I was literally sitting in a closet with a stain down the front of my dress. I was the definition of a dirty secret.
And for some reason I waited. A minute. Maybe two. Maybe freaking fifteen. And as the seconds ticked by in my head, I knew Matt wasn’t coming back. He left me. He left me alone in his dark room. Locked away in his closet like the dirty secret that I was.
I wiped away the tears beneath my eyes. Matt Caldwell was an asshole. And I was done believing a word from his mouth.
I pushed open the closet door. I’d waited so long that my eyes had already adjusted to the darkness. I went to open his bedroom door, but paused. I needed to tell him what I hadn’t before. I’d let him kiss me instead like an idiot.
I switched on his lights and walked over to his nightstand. The top of it was empty except for the bedside lamp. I opened up the first drawer. I swallowed hard. Like me, he had a huge box of condoms. But unlike me? It was open. I’ll make it worth your while like always.
I rummaged through the drawer, looking for a notepad and pen.
I found a pen but nothing to write on. I opened up the next drawer and froze.
There was just one folder inside with Isabella’s name on it.
I lifted it out of the drawer and opened it, assuming it was old school notes or something.
But it was filled with pictures. Candids.
Of her. I lifted up one. Then the next. And the next.
They were all of Isabella. Her laughing.
Her with her friends. Her freaking eating at some posh restaurant.
I thought about the way she touched him.
The way he didn’t flinch. He told me they weren’t dating.
But Matthew Caldwell was a liar. It was the only thing I knew about him for sure.
I grabbed one of the pictures and turned it over. I closed my eyes and it was almost like I could still feel his body pressed against mine. Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me you felt nothing and I’ll leave you alone.
I opened my eyes and stared down at the back of the picture.
“I feel nothing,” I wrote out. I didn’t sign it.
He’d know it was from me. Besides, if he brought Isabella back to his room tonight, I didn’t want her to see a note from me.
She tortured me enough. I didn’t need to give her any more ammunition.
I walked out of his room, feeling the weight of the lie in the note. Because honestly? I didn’t feel nothing. I felt…broken. And I was pretty sure it was exactly how Matt wanted me to feel.