Runaway - Chapter 58
Saturday - Present Day
Jacob was fast asleep in my arms as I walked down the hall. He was heavy. But the gun in the waistband of my jeans felt heavier.
Tonight everything would change.
I’d never be able to go back.
I swallowed hard and stopped outside my uncle’s old apartment.
Someone new probably lived there now. If I’d had any idea how short my time was going to be there, I would have tried to spend more time with my uncle.
I would have tried to be better behaved.
I would have done so many things differently.
I turned away. Thinking of all my regrets wasn’t why I was here. I kissed Jacob’s forehead and he stirred in his sleep. He made this adorable little moaning noise.
And I almost changed my plan. Looking down at his sweet face made me want to rethink everything.
But I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t do this. I couldn’t. As hard as it was to risk everything…I had to do this.
Please still live here, Mrs. Alcaraz. I walked down the hall and knocked on her door. I tried to breathe slowly, settling my nerves. Please be here.
I heard the muffled sound of someone saying “puta mierda” and smiled.
I still had no idea what that meant. All I knew was that it was something bad.
And I knew exactly who was on the other side of the door.
I knew exactly how shocked she was to see me after all these years.
And I’d kind of guessed she’d call me that.
The door opened and it was like I was transported back in time. Knocking on the door when I was back in high school. I couldn’t help but smile through all the pain of the last couple weeks.
Kennedy was standing there. Staring at me like she was looking at a ghost. Which made sense.
She thought I’d died 16 years ago. And even though she looked shocked…
I could tell she was happy. She looked like the Kennedy I knew when I first met her.
Before everything broke. Before I messed everything up.
There was a reason I’d stayed away this whole time.
Because I knew that everyone was better off without me.
“Brooklyn?” her voice wavered.
I didn’t even hesitate. God, I’d been dying to talk to her for 16 years.
Dying to let her know I was out there. And it was so fucking good to see my best friend.
I threw my arms around her. Or…one arm. Because I was still holding Jacob.
I didn’t care if she was happier without me in her life.
I’d missed her. I’d missed her so freaking much.
For a second she just stood there frozen. And then she started to cry and she hugged me back.
“You’re alive.” It didn’t sound like she believed her own words. “What the hell?” She took a step back from me. Looked back at my son. Back at me. “Seriously, what the hell is going on? Where have you been all these years?”
“I’m really sorry. For everything. I’ve spent half a lifetime wishing I could fix what happened between us. And I wish I had more time to explain but…I have to go.” Before I chicken out.
“Wait, what?”
I wanted to ask her a million questions. Was she still with Felix? Was that why she looked happy? Had everything turned out the way she wanted? But I didn’t have time to catch up. And it would just make leaving harder. “Is your mom here?”
Kennedy nodded.
I could tell she was in shock. And as much as I wished I could sit and talk to her for hours, I didn’t have time.
I walked over to the couch and lay Jacob down.
Tears formed in my eyes as I leaned over and kissed his forehead.
I love you. So much, sweet boy. I’m doing this for you.
For us. I pushed his hair off his forehead.
And I said a silent prayer that everything would go according to plan and I’d be back in an hour.
This wasn’t goodbye. It couldn’t be. He needed me.
I’d come back and we’d disappear for good this time. The two of us against the world.
I wiped the tears out of my eyes and knocked on Mrs. Alcaraz’s bedroom door.
“Mi amor, please stop questioning a good thing…” Mrs. Alcaraz’s words stopped as soon as she saw me. “Ay dios mío. Mi amor.” She grabbed both sides of my face. “You’re alive.”
God, she still smelled like empanadas and home. I was seconds away from falling apart. Seconds away from staying. But I’d be putting them all in danger. I needed to finish what I should have finished years ago.
I pulled the envelope out of my pocket. I’d written down everything.
What had happened years ago. What I was about to do.
All of it. I’d arranged for Mrs. Alcaraz to be Jacob’s guardian just in case something happened to me.
All she had to do was call my lawyer and sign the papers.
My will was rock solid. My father wouldn’t be stealing Jacob away like he’d stolen me.
Not that I was worried about that happening after tonight.
“I’m going to be back in an hour. But if…if I don’t come back…” my voice cracked. I couldn’t think like that. But I had to think like that because of my son. I had to think of everything to protect him. “If I don’t come back, I need you to take care of my baby,” I said.
“What?”
I gestured to Jacob on the couch. “It’s all in here,” I said and handed her the envelope.
“If I don’t come back, read it. It explains everything.
But he likes watching football on Sundays.
And don’t always make him wear a shirt. He hates them.
Just keep my baby safe. Please.” I grabbed Mrs. Alcaraz’s hands. “Please.”
She just nodded. “Of course.”
“You can’t leave,” Kennedy said. “You just got here. You can’t.” There were tears in her eyes again.
I’m so sorry. For everything. “Don’t tell a soul I was here. No one can know. Not until it’s safe.”
“When will we know it’s safe?” Kennedy asked.
“When I come back. Or…when you read the note in an hour.” I gave her another hug. “You’ve always been my best friend. Always, Kennedy. And I really am so sorry about everything.”
“I’m sorry too,” she said. “I’m so fucking sorry, Brooklyn.”
I closed my eyes. “And if I don’t come back, make sure Jacob knows how much I love him. And that I did it for him.” I quickly stepped back before I completely lost it.
I took one last look at Jacob and it felt like my heart was breaking.
I wasn’t ready. I needed one more minute.
Just to make sure he’d be okay if I didn’t come back.
I needed him to be okay. And he was scared of strangers.
I didn’t want him to freak out. I crouched down in front of him on the couch and lightly shook his shoulder. “Jacob, wake up.”
He moaned in his sleep.
I shook his shoulder again and he slowly opened his eyes. “Mommy.” His eyes darted to Mrs. Alcaraz and then he tried to duck under my arms.
“Sweet boy, I have to run out for a bit. But these are Mommy’s friends and they’re going to be right here with you while I’m gone.”
“Nooo.” He kept trying to hide.
I blinked fast so I wouldn’t cry. “I’ll be back. I promise.” I didn’t want to lie. I wanted it to be true.
“Hey, Jacob,” Kennedy said and sat down beside me. She always knew when I needed her. And right now I really needed her. She smiled at me and then down at my son.
Jacob blinked at her.
“It’s nice to meet you,” she said. “I heard you like football.”
He pressed his little lips together as he stared at her.
“She’s my best friend,” I said. “And she’s going to be right here until I get back, okay?”
His eyelids were growing heavy again. “Footie,” he mumbled. If he was calm enough to fall asleep knowing there were strangers watching him, he’d be calm enough waking up too. He had to be. He had to be my brave little man. I watched his eyes close and his breathing slow.
I glanced over at Kennedy who was staring down at my son. She reached out and pushed his bangs out of his face. “He looks like you,” she whispered.
No. He looked like his father. I blinked faster, barely keeping my tears at bay.
Jacob would be safe here if the next few hours didn’t go as planned.
Kennedy and Mrs. Alcaraz would make sure of it.
I leaned down and kissed his forehead. I love you.
I love you so much. I closed my eyes tight and breathed him in.
I needed his strength. I’m doing this for you, sweet boy.
For your father. For our family. I stood up and turned away without looking back.
It felt like my heart was on fire again as I ran down the rickety stairs and climbed into a taxi.
I stared out the window at the cars zipping past. I hated it here. The air smelled rotten. There were too many people. It was stifling.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
The last thing I needed right now was to have a panic attack.
The cab pulled to a stop outside my dad’s apartment building.
The doorman let me in and I ducked my head and hurried past him.
I slammed the door closed button on the elevator before he could realize I wasn’t a resident.
The doors slowly slid closed and I breathed a sigh of relief.
This place definitely didn’t have the best security in the city anymore.
I would have said it was my lucky day, but I didn’t have lucky days.
My days were all hell because of my father.
He’d ruined everything.
He’d ruined my whole fucking life.
The elevator slowed to a stop on his floor. I stepped off. I remembered the last time I’d been here. The morning after Thanksgiving.
My father stole my kidney.
He never cared.
I’d forgiven him for stealing my kidney. But I’d never forgive him for killing my husband. I’d told him what would happen if he ever came after Miller. I’d fucking told him.
I said he’d be dead to me. Buried in the grave next to my fake one. I meant it metaphorically back then. I didn’t mean it metaphorically anymore.
Jacob had been eerily calm following Miller’s instructions after the explosion. I was eerily calm now. Because really, I’d been planning this for a long time. I’d gone over it a million times in my head over the past 16 years.
I took a deep breath and knocked on my father’s door.
I thought I’d be scared.
I thought I might change my mind.
But now that I was here, I wasn’t second guessing a thing. Because I’d been debating one question over the past 16 years - Had my father ever really loved me? I knew the answer now.
No.
He’d told my mom to abort me.
Never.
He only got close to me to steal my kidney.
Nunca.
He’d killed my fucking husband.
I pulled my gun out of my waistband and held it up in front of me. It was time for Richard Pruitt to take his last breath.