Exposed - Chapter 26
Tuesday
Brooklyn
It was easy to feel okay when Matt was by my side. But it was just as easy to feel not okay when he wasn’t with me.
Guilt wrapped around my chest at just the thought of laughing with someone other than Miller. Holding someone other than Miller. Loving someone other than Miller.
Love wasn’t supposed to hurt this fucking much.
I drew closer to the fire. The smell of burning wood reminded me of my husband. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath of him. Tonight everything just hurt.
My phone buzzed.
I opened my eyes and stared down at a text from Tanner: “Are you okay?”
I took a deep breath of the burning fire. Tanner understood. And even though he wouldn’t talk to me about the woman he’d lost, he knew exactly how I’d be feeling tonight. He knew I needed this check in. I texted him back: “It hurts the most when Matt’s not here.”
“I told you grief is easier when you’re surrounded by love.”
He had told me that. I stared down at his words.
And he was right. Of course he was. I’d tried to tell myself that I could do this on my own.
But I didn’t want to drown in my grief. Not again.
I remembered feeling like a shadow of myself when I’d moved to California.
I didn’t want that. I just wanted to be… me.
My phone buzzed again. “And even though Matt’s busy right now, there are other people that love you in this city. Open the door when you hear a knock.”
I lowered my eyebrows. What was he talking about? The only person I hung out with one on one other than Matt was Tanner. And I was pretty sure they were together right now. Maybe it was Nigel? But Nigel wouldn’t knock. He’d walked right in this morning while I was baking.
I jumped when there was a knock on the door.
Jacob came running down the stairs. “Is Abuelo here to play with me? He’s the best to play knights with.”
I laughed. Yeah…because Tanner actually let Jacob hit him with his sticks for some reason. “I’m not sure. Let’s see who it is.”
I peered out the blinds to get a look. I was still a little on edge in this city. My dad might appear at any moment and try to steal my liver or something. Or Poppy might pop up with a bomb.
But it wasn’t some sinister presence. Penny was standing there with a bottle of wine and Scarlett.
And a few people I didn’t recognize - another woman, a little girl, and a little boy.
Or maybe I did recognize the other woman.
I think she’d been at the homecoming game. But that day was a little blurry.
I knew Penny was close to Matt. And she was James’ wife. I wanted to get to know her better. Really, I wanted to thank her for taking care of the Untouchables when I couldn’t. Because I knew she had. And I knew just how much work that was. They were all impossible.
“Scarlett!” Jacob yelled. He ran to the door and threw it open.
“Hey, Jacob!” Scarlett walked into the house and pointed to the other kids. “This is Sophie and Axel. They can be your friends too.”
“Okay,” Jacob said. I thought he’d be nervous, but he looked so excited to have more playmates. “Can we play cowboys and Indians?”
Well, that explained it. That was much more fun with more people. And we’d always played everything just the three of us.
“Can I be a cowboy?” asked the little boy.
Jacob nodded.
“Where are the guns?”
Jacob didn’t have any toy guns. We’d lived a really simple life at the lake house. We used sticks as swords. And we just made finger guns for our pistols.
Jacob lifted his hand, not at all embarrassed that he didn’t have some fancy toy gun. “Pew.”
The boy smiled and lifted both his hands.
Scarlett screamed and grabbed Jacob’s arm. They ducked for cover behind the couch.
The other little girl looked up at me. “Can I have one of those?” She pointed to the cupcakes on the counter. “But only if the icing is chocolate. And the cupcake is vanilla. And no sprinkles. I’ll have them on the side if I have to, but I don’t really like them.”
I laughed. Because it was the most ridiculous request and also kind of the cutest thing ever. “I think I have just what you’re looking for.” I grabbed one of the cupcakes that fit her descriptive list.
Her eyes beamed.
“Sophie!” Scarlett yelled. “You need to be a cowboy with Axel!”
“Coming!” She ran into the family room carrying her special order cupcake.
The woman next to Penny cringed. “There’s probably an 80 percent chance that is going to end up on the floor.” She hurried after Sophie.
“Sorry to barge in,” Penny said. “But the guys were hanging out and…I figured maybe you could use some company. Plus Scarlett asks me ten times a day to hang out with Jacob again.”
“Jacob does the same thing.”
“And I brought wine.” She lifted up the bottle. “I’ll be honest with you, I know very little about wine. Daphne is great at picking things out though and she recommended this one.” She lowered her voice. “She orders everything just like her daughter. It’s a nightmare when we go out to dinner.”
I laughed. “Okay, so Sophie is Daphne’s daughter. And Daphne is married to Rob, right?”
“Nailed it.”
“I was kind of a mess on Saturday. What is Mason’s wife’s name again?”
“Bee. She had a work thing or she would have been here too.”
Daphne walked back over carrying the cupcake. “I can’t believe Matt restored this house. I really thought he lived in a bachelor pad.”
“Wait, you’ve never seen this place?”
“No,” Daphne said. “He never invited us over.”
“Really?” I knew Matt was close with his friends. And his friends’ wives.
Penny nodded. “I only saw it because I showed up unexpected with a housewarming present he didn’t want. I refused to be turned away.”
“I wonder why he didn’t want you to see it,” I said.
Daphne looked at Penny.
“What?” I asked.
“I know everyone’s already told you this, but ever since I’ve known him he’s been holding on to all this pain. And…” Daphne looked around the kitchen. “This is a family home. Do you think maybe he made it for you?”
Matt had said that. He kept this part of his life private from his friends. Not just the house. But his paintings upstairs.
“One of the reasons why Daphne is amazing,” Penny said. “She’s the most understanding person I know. She…gets it.” It looked like she wanted to say more, but she pressed her lips together.
“I lost my brother,” Daphne said. “And I know that’s not the same.
At all. I can’t even imagine what you’re going through.
But I’m here if you want to talk. We all are.
Matt wouldn’t let us in. But I don’t want it to be that way with us.
I know only Mason and Matt are related, but I view them as family just as much as Rob and James.
As far as I’m concerned, if you’re with Matt, you’re basically our sister. ”
“Agreed,” Penny said.
I barely knew these women. But Tanner was right.
I did feel loved. They wanted to get to know me just as much as I wanted to get to know them.
But I didn’t know if I wanted to spend the whole night talking about how much my heart was hurting.
I’d rather fill in some missing pieces. “So what on earth is it like being married to Rob?”
Daphne laughed. “An adventure. Even more so now with the kids. Every day is like a circus.”
That was a really great way to put it. “And is that your son?” I looked back over at the kids. The little boy didn’t look very much like Rob or Daphne. He had a head of blonde hair. “Or is that maybe Mason’s son?”
“Mason and Bee don’t have any kids,” Penny said. “Yet. But I bet they will soon. That’s Axel. He’s the son of my friends Tyler and Hailey. You’ll love them too. Sophie, Scarlett, and Axel are all the same age. They’re practically inseparable. And now Jacob too. How old is he?”
“Four.”
“That’s so perfect. They’ll all be in the same grade. All the kids are enrolled in the same kindergarten. We’ll have to get Jacob a spot too.”
“Oh. I don’t think…” my voice trailed off. These women were both married to Hunters. They were filthy rich. “I doubt I can afford the same school that your kids are going to.”
“Well Matt can,” Penny said.
I was sure that was true. But Matt and I weren’t technically together. And I wasn’t going to ask him to pay for my son’s kindergarten. As far as I was concerned, children should go to free kindergartens.
“Sorry,” Penny quickly said. “It’s just…the two of you are going to end up together. I have a really good sense about these things.”
“Penny thinks she’s a matchmaker,” Daphne said. “She’s definitely not. She set Matt up twice. Once with a girl who accidentally set his dick on fire. And once with our wedding planner, Justin, because she thought Matt was secretly gay.”
I had a lot of questions about what she just said. But my mind stuck on one thing. “Wait. Justin Belle?”
“Yeah, do you know him?” Daphne asked.
I nodded. Yeah I knew Justin. He’d practically been my fairy godmother back in high school.
And now he was a wedding planner? That was his dream.
I couldn’t believe he’d done it. “I’m so glad he followed his dreams. I knew him back in high school when he was working for Odegaard. Did he plan both of your weddings?”
Penny nodded. “And he’s amazing. He planned Daphne’s shotgun wedding in record time.”
Daphne laughed. “Let’s have some wine and you can rapid fire questions at us. Penny and I haven’t had a drink in a million years. I figure now is as good of a time as ever to pump and dump.”
That sounded like a good idea. I had so much more I needed to know.
***
Okay, I officially loved these girls. I’d never really been able to see why James was with Rachel.
And I definitely couldn’t see him with Isabella.
But Penny and him made total sense. I bet she made him smile every day.
And that’s exactly what he needed. I remembered his silly proposal back in high school.
Where he said we could be miserable together.
Why be miserable when you could be so blissfully happy?
And Daphne was the complete opposite of Rob. I loved Rob, but I felt like this was a good thing. No one needed two Robs in a room. And I bet Daphne balanced him out. She was always quick to laugh at a joke too. She was a perfect match for him.
“Isabella left you naked in the warehouse district?” Penny asked.
I nodded. “I had to make my way all the way back to the hotel in just my underwear and a map wrapped around myself.”
Penny cringed. “And then what happened?”
I went to your husband. I walked in on him with his cock shoved down Rachel’s throat.
He helped me when no one else would. I remembered him holding me in the shower as I cried.
“James helped me.” That seemed like the best way to put the events of that night.
“But God, I messed everything up so bad back then. The Caldwells were fighting with the Hunters. And even though it was Isabella’s fault…
I put some of that blame on myself. I’m just so happy they’re all friends again. ”
“They had another falling out after college,” Penny said.
“Not anything like what you described in high school. It was more that they drifted apart. I asked James about it the other night. And I think they were all just so broken from what happened. It was hard for them to see each other. It was hard not to talk about it because Matt didn’t want to.
It was all such a mess. You left such a hole in all their hearts. ”
I got that. They’d all left a hole in my heart too. I was only in love with Matt. But I’d loved each of the Untouchables in my own way. “I can’t believe no one calls them the Untouchables anymore.”
“Because they weren’t untouchable,” Daphne said. “They lost you.”
I took another sip of my wine. “Part of the reason why I stayed away was because I thought everyone was better off without me. I thought they were okay. I really did. I never meant to hurt anyone.”
“Time heals all wounds,” Daphne said. “I truly believe that.”
Penny nodded. “Time helped James, Rob, and Mason. And I know it would have eventually healed Matt too, but I’m so glad you showed up when you did. You two are so meant to be.”
Penny was definitely a romantic. And I don’t know if it was the wine, or the fact that I couldn’t get Matt out of my head all night, but I believed what she said. That maybe Matt and I were meant to be now . It was our time to be happy together.
Penny’s phone buzzed. She downed her glass. “It’s showtime,” she said.
“What?” Daphne asked.
“Wait for it.”
I laughed. “You sound like Rob.”
“This is actually even more epic than something Rob would plan. Come with me. Daphne, will you stay here and watch the kids?”
“Um…sure?” Daphne seemed just as confused as I was.
Penny pulled me out the front door.
Matt was standing there with a boombox on his shoulder, blasting My Dirty Little Secret . He was in his old football uniform, minus the helmet.
And for just a moment, it felt like we were back in time.
“Brooklyn, I wanted to do this 16 years ago.” He put the boombox down and knelt on the city sidewalk.
Oh my God, what was he doing?
“Will you…”
I shook my head. I wasn’t ready. It was too soon. I couldn’t do this to Miller. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. I just kept shaking my head. I can’t, Matt. I can’t. I felt the tears trailing down my cheeks. And I was pretty sure I was freaking out because I wanted to say yes. I wanted to and it killed me.
Matt kept the smile on his face. But he lowered his eyebrows ever so slightly. Like he was disappointed by my reaction.
“Matt…” my voice cracked.
He cleared his throat. “Brooklyn, will you go to prom with me?”
Wait…what? “Prom?”
“It’s a promposal!” Penny said as she snapped a photo of us.
“Prom?” I said again.
Matt got up off his knee. “Don’t cry.” He wiped my tears away with his thumbs. “You said you missed out on so many things. I can give you this. We’re going to recreate prom for you. And for Penny. For her birthday party celebration this Friday. Be my date, Brooklyn.”
I nodded. I could do that. I could definitely do that. I threw my arms around him.
He laughed and caught me around the waist. He twirled me around in his arms to the song that meant the world to me. And I had the oddest sensation that everything was going to be okay. Because Matt would always be there to catch me when I fell.