Chapter 18
MARCO
I’m pacing down the rows of the noir vines, breathing in the fresh earthiness of the ground and the woody green, slightly honeyed scent of the grapevines.
This is usually enough to center me, but today it’s not.
My coffee is still hot in my thermos, but my stomach is in knots and I can’t drink it.
This is fucking futile. Try as I might, I’m not going to find my zen out here.
Giving up, I lower myself onto the edge of the fountain and let the sun beat down on my upturned face, willing Karina to text me.
Why did she run out on me yesterday, without even saying goodbye? And what happened when she got home? Is she in trouble with her family? Does she need my help? Or am I supposed to give her space? When exactly is the goddamn wedding happening?
I’ve stopped myself multiple times from sending her a message. Each time I’m about to, something stops me. As if I know that it’s too risky, that it’s not a good time.
I check my phone for what must be the fiftieth time this morning, but there’s still nothing from Karina. Dammit.
Yesterday, I was flying high being with Karina while still reveling in my victory on the track. Today is the complete opposite. I have a bad feeling, or maybe it’s just anxiety, but I can’t pinpoint the source of it. I need to see her again. Maybe then the unsettled feeling will stop.
“Hmmm, that’s a look I never thought I’d see on your face.”
Frankie appears at the end of a row and heads toward me.
“What look is that?” I ask.
She eases herself onto the edge of the fountain next to me. “I don’t know what to call it, but I can’t help wondering if it has anything to do with…Karina Rossi?”
Electricity shoots through me as she speaks Karina’s name out loud. Jesus.
“Keep your voice down, Frankie.”
Glancing around, I can’t readily tell if there are any eavesdropping workers hovering nearby, or any of my brothers tucked amidst the vines.
Which is unlikely, maybe, but still possible.
The nice thing about the fountain, though, is that the splashing water muffles sound—so at least our conversation will be semi-private.
Frankie smiles gently. “So, just to be clear…the lovesick puppy dog look that’s been all over your face the past few weeks is because of a Bruno? You know she’s one of them, right?”
I rub the back of my neck, avoiding eye contact with my sister-in-law. Not that it’s any use. She’s always had an uncanny ability to read me. Most of the time, she’s spot-on. Which is why, even though I don’t answer her, my silence tells her everything she needs to know.
“Oh, Marco,” she says. “How did this happen?”
There’s no judgement in her tone, but her voice does have an edge. She’s thinking about how this will affect her husband, all of us really. A Bellanti and a Bruno. It’s unheard of.
Honestly, I knew the risks all along, but I was too caught up in my addiction to the raw emotions Karina drums up in me.
We’ve been enjoying each other and, for me at least, it’s overridden any possibility of trouble caused by our surnames.
But I never expected things between us to go this far.
And now I’m in deeper than I ever imagined.
“I don’t know.” I drink my coffee and stare into the fountain. “How’d you find out?”
Frankie sighs. “I saw you at the track the other day, coming out from behind the stands. She looked a little…flushed. And you looked like the most satisfied man on the planet. It was kind of obvious. Two and two makes four.”
“It’s not what you think,” I protest.
“You’re saying I’m wrong?”
I hesitate. “Maybe.”
She laughs gently. “Marco, look at me. What is going on?”
Frankie is the sweetest person I know. She’s quick to buffer any conflict between my brothers and me, quick to soothe bruised egos and soften sharp words.
I’ve never known her to be self-serving in any way and she’s done nothing but make Dante a better man.
That’s why I’m glad it was her who saw Karina and me, and not someone else.
Frankie might not like it, but she won’t interfere, and I know she’ll have my back for as long as she can.
Still, I can’t help wishing I’d been more careful.
“You’re reading too much into this,” I say. “It’s casual.”
Frankie searches my eyes for a moment. “Maybe, maybe not. But are you sure you have a handle on this?” Her voice lowers even more.
“That family is responsible for the deaths of your mom and your sister. Your father’s car wreck.
My and Charlie’s kidnapping. God, and that failed sabotage attempt on your race car last season.
Karina might seem different, but what if her motives aren’t as innocent as they seem?
I’m not trying to overstep, but you’ve got me worried. ”
“Karina isn’t responsible for any of those things,” I point out.
“She’s a Bruno by proxy. What’s going to happen when your brothers find out you’re falling in love with the niece of the man who still has hits out on your family?”
I swallow hard and finish the rest of my coffee. I appreciate Frankie’s very valid concerns. I do. But this is where I lie.
“I’m not falling in love. I just…I think she can help us,” I say. “I’m trying to get information out of her.”
Frankie regards me for a moment, cocking her head as if she’s trying to decide whether to believe me or not. I hope she buys it. It’s a convenient excuse that will allow me to keep seeing Karina without having to deal with endless guilt and grief from my brothers…if they find out.
“Karina is as innocent as they come,” I add. “I’ve got her practically eating out of my hand. It’s just a matter of time before I figure out what all she knows.”
“So, you’re using her,” she concludes. “What have you found out so far? And do your brothers know you’re playing spy with this girl?”
If she’s asking me, then it means she hasn’t said anything to Dante yet about me and Karina. Thank God. The last thing I need is to have him breathing down my neck.
I get up and pace a little in front of Frankie.
“I don’t have anything solid yet. She’s not really tied to the family business as far as I can tell, so if she does have any leads, it’ll be things she’s overheard or accidentally stumbled onto.
Hell, this whole thing is probably going to be a dead end.
But I figured it was worth a shot. She’s getting married off soon, so I have to squeeze her now before the chance is completely gone. ”
The more I talk about Karina like she’s nothing more than my pawn, the worse my unease grows. My fingers jerk as I nearly reach for my phone again, but I smile reassuringly at Frankie instead. I can tell by her eyes that she’s not completely buying my story, but I ignore it.
“Okay…” she says, chewing her lip.
“Anyway, that’s why I haven’t said anything to my brothers. Didn’t want them getting their hopes up over nothing. Plus, they get so overprotective. Think they know everything.”
“I believe that runs in the family,” she says teasingly. “But I won’t tell on you.”
Ignoring the jab, I hold out my hands to help her up. “Come on. It’s almost lunchtime.”
“You think you can distract me with the promise of food?” Frankie asks.
“Yeah, I do.”
“Maybe you’re right,” she says with a laugh. “Let’s head back.”
As we make our way down through the vineyard and toward the house, I try to pay attention to Frankie’s stream of excited chatter about the upcoming harvest and all her plans for the Bellanti grapes.
But honestly, my mind is miles away. I never imagined I’d be in this position.
Pretending I’m someone that I’m not and doing it because of a woman.
Sure, I’ve played my cards right when it comes to hookups, but I’m always straight about what I can offer and what I expect in return.
No strings, no attachments. Certainly no expectations of anything exclusive, long-term, or—dare I say it? —permanent.
Yet here I am pretending to be spying on Karina just so I can keep seeing her under everyone’s noses.
Not that I haven’t been keeping an ear open for anything she might let slip about her family…
but that was never why I wanted her. Or why my insides are so twisted up with this relentless longing to be with her.
It’s not why I want to snatch her in the middle of the night and carry her off like a fucking caveman.
I can’t put a name on whatever is driving me to be this way, and maybe I don’t need to put a label on it. But what I do need is to figure out a safe way to contact Karina.
Because one thing is certain: I can’t go much longer without her.