Chapter 40
Kairi leaned in slightly, just enough for her voice to dip. "If I asked one more question, would you answer it?"
Miss Herrera's eyes didn't move away. "Depends."
Kairi's voice softened into a challenge. "On whether you want to?"
Miss Herrera tilted her head, her voice dipping too—measured, steady, kalmado. "No. On whether you're brave enough to ask it."
Napakurap si Kairi.
She hadn't expected that.
But Miss Herrera wasn't done.
"You've already asked," she said, unhurried. "About people I've dated. If I've left them. If I've ever dated someone younger." Hindi umiwas ang mga mata niya. "And I let you."
Kairi swallowed, pero hindi rin umiwas ng tingin.
Miss Herrera's next words were slower. "Pero alam nating pareho na that wasn't really your question."
Napabuntong-hininga si Kairi—parang gusto niyang itanggi, pero hindi niya magawa. Hindi niya kaya. "Miss, you're overreading."
"No, I'm not."
Miss Herrera shifted slightly, her posture looser now—elegant, but unguarded in a way Kairi hadn't seen often.
One leg crossed over the other. Her arm draped along the back of the sofa—close enough para dumikit ang dulo ng daliri niya sa sleeve ng damit ni Kairi. Not touching. But enough to be felt.
"You want to know if it's possible," she said, gaze steady. "If someone like me could ever look at someone like you and feel...uncertain."
Kumabog ang dibdib ni Kairi. Her fingers tensed on her lap.
"You're not asking out of curiosity," pagpapatuloy ni Miss Herrera. "You're asking because part of you is scared it's already happening."
Mas malakas pa sa kahit anong salita ang katahimikang sumunod.
Kairi glanced away, jaw tight. Hindi siya agad nakapagsalita. Then—
"You didn't answer my question, Miss."
Miss Herrera tilted her head slightly. "Which one?"
"The one about dating someone younger," Kairi said, trying to recover a smirk. "Like...stupidly younger."
Miss Herrera exhaled through her nose—hindi galit, pero may halong amusement at warning. "You're still pushing that?"
"You didn't deny it."
"I didn't entertain it either."
Kairi turned slightly, catching her gaze again. "So you have."
"I didn't say that."
"Miss—"
"What, Kairi?"
Miss Herrera's voice stayed smooth, her eyes unreadable—but something in her posture gave, just slightly. Her fingers moved again—this time, intentional na ang pagdampi sa edge ng sleeve ni Kairi.
Kairi's breath caught. Hindi siya umatras. Pero parang nanigas ang katawan niya sa simple at maliit na pagdamping iyon.
Miss Herrera leaned in a fraction more—not closing the space completely, pero sapat na para maramdaman ni Kairi iyong init, iyong presence na nagmumula sa babaeng kaharap niya.
"Let's say I did," Miss Herrera said, almost in a whisper. "Let's say I dated someone younger. Much younger. Someone who tested my patience. Made me question things. Pull back, then pull closer again."
Hindi kumurap si Kairi.
"And let's say," Miss Herrera continued, her voice soft. "That I knew better. But didn't always do better."
Kairi's mouth parted slightly—but she didn't speak.
Miss Herrera let the weight of those words settle before finishing. "What would you do with that answer?"
The silence that followed wasn't hesitant.
It was heavy. Electric. Almost cruel in how gently it held them suspended.
Kairi blinked slowly, her throat dry. Her lips curled into something between a smile and surrender.
"I think I'd ask another question."
Miss Herrera smiled now—small, knowing. "Of course you would."
Pero bago pa makapagsalita ulit si Kairi, bago pa man siya makalanghap ng hangin para sa isa na namang tanong na baka hindi rin niya kayaning bitiwan—
Narinig nila ang tunog ng mga hakbang pababa.
Ella's voice cut through the air like a slap of reality. "Okay, ten minutes lang akong nawala and now, it feels like a war's about to start or someone's about to make out. Did I miss something?"
Bahagyang umatras si Kairi—trying to keep the smirk, pero binigo siya ng sariling pulso niya dahil sa bilis ng pantig nito. She could feel it. In her throat. In her hands.
Umayos rin sa pagkakaupo si Miss Herrera, face unreadable again.
"No," she said coolly. "You didn't miss a thing."
The movie had long since stopped making sense.
Background noise na lang, static colors on screen, half-finished drinks and half-spoken words.
At some point, tumayo si Miss Herrera mula sa sofa and slipped outside, saying something about needing air—kahit obvious naman sa kanilang lahat kung anong ibig sabihin nito.
Naghintay si Ella hanggang sa marinig nila ang pag-click ng back door bago siya nagsalita. Her tone wasn't loud. Just deliberate.
"So," she said, not looking directly at Kairi. "What was that?"
Kairi didn't move. "What do you mean?"
Ella gave a soft scoff. "Don't insult me my intelligence, cousin."
Kairi's gaze stayed on the screen, pero wala naman talaga siyang tinitingnan. Her voice dropped lower. "It wasn't anything."
"That's the kind of nothing that makes people forget to breathe," Ella said, turning her body toward Kairi. "You two were talking like the world might end after the next sentence."
Kairi didn't answer.
"She gets under your skin," Ella said gently. "You get under hers. Obvious kaya."
Kairi swallowed, her fingers curling into the hem of her shirt. "It's not that simple."
"Yeah, hindi nga," Ella's voice softened. "But it's not nothing either."
Finally, Kairi turned to her. "She didn't say anything, Ella. Not really. Hindi naman talaga siya nagsasabi."
"She said plenty," Ella replied. "Just not in words."
That silence stretched between them, the kind that didn't need filling. Ella didn't push. She just let the weight of it settle hanggang sa sa wakas, ibinagsak na lang ni Kairi ang ulo niya pabalik sa sandalan ng upuan, exhaling through her nose.
"I don't even know what I'm doing," Kairi admitted, quieter now. "Parang...every time I try to step back, she does something. Says something. And suddenly I'm right there again."
Tumango si Ella, like she'd already guessed. "You don't have to have it all figured out."
"I shouldn't even be—" Kairi cut herself off, shaking her head. "It's complicated."
"Of course it is," Ella nudged her knee gently. "Pero nakita ko kung paano ka niya tingnan. Like you weren't just a question she didn't want to answer. Like you were the one she couldn't stop asking."
That nearly undid Kairi.
Kairi looked down. Her voice was a whisper. "She went outside."
"She did," Ella said, tilting her head toward the door. "Go."
Nagdalawang-isip si Kairi. "What if I shouldn't?"
Ella gave a soft shrug. "Then bumalik ka rito. But if you don't go now, you'll wonder what she would've said. And I know you, Kai. That'll eat at you."
Another pause.
Then Kairi stood, slow, uncertain. Tumingin siya sa pinto. Then kay Ella.
Ella just smiled—gentler this time, walang halong biro. "No script. No plan. Just go."
And with that, Kairi quietly made her way to the door—heart somewhere in her throat, footsteps light, like the floor itself might give out if she wasn't careful.
She opened it slowly.
The night air was cool, and the scent of faint smoke lingered.
Miss Herrera stood just outside, close enough for Kairi to catch the ember's brief flare between her fingers as she lifted the cigarette to her lips and inhaled slowly, like she had all the time in the world.
She didn't turn right away, but Kairi knew she'd heard the door.
Then, softly—
"You're not supposed to be out here."
Pero lumabas pa rin si Kairi, letting the door fall shut behind her. "I didn't know this was a restricted area."
Miss Herrera didn't respond at first. She just stood there, her hand holding the cigarette like a habit she'd grown used to hiding. The faint ember glowed for a second before she flicked it, letting it dangle between her fingers.
"You know, Miss, if you keep that up, you're gonna ruin your whole mysterious academic reputation."
Miss Herrera glanced at her. "Didn't realize I had one."
Kairi grinned. "Oh, you do. Cold, elegant, intimidating."
Miss Herrera gave a dry huff of a laugh and brought the cigarette to her lips again, drawing in only slightly. "Well. I'll try not to disappoint the myth."
There was a pause.
Then Kairi, trying to sound casual, asked, "Miss, are you ever gonna let me try one?"
That made Miss Herrera turn to face her properly, brows lifting. "No."
"Bakit naman hindi?"
"Because you're smarter than that," she said flatly.
Kairi smirked. "I might not be."
"Not in this case," Miss Herrera replied, taking another shallow drag before flicking the ash away. "You're not touching this."
"Fine," Kairi said, mock-sulking. "Guess I'll just go back to judging people who smoke."
Miss Herrera raised a brow. "Including me?"
Kairi pretended to think about it. "Normally? Yeah. Ayaw ko kasi iyong amoy. And the taste it leaves in the air. Plus the whole 'slowly killing yourself' thing is kind of a turn-off."
"Mm," Miss Herrera hummed. "Appreciated."
"But," dagdag ni Kairi, looking at her sideways. "You get a pass."
Tiningnan siya ni Miss Herrera. "I do?"
"Yeah," Kairi shrugged. "With you, it looks...different."
"Different how?"
"I don't know. Cooler. Controlled. Like everything you do is on purpose."
Hindi agad sumagot si Miss Herrera. She just watched Kairi—with suspicion. Or maybe interest. O baka both.
Then Kairi looked straight at her and said, too easily, "Kind of hot, actually."
That made Miss Herrera pause mid-motion. Hindi siya umiwas ng tingin, but her fingers stilled slightly near her mouth.
A slow exhale followed. Then a faint, dangerous smile.
"That right?"
Kairi's heart skipped.
Just slightly.
She tried to keep the grin on her face. "Don't let it get to your head, Miss."
Miss Herrera took her time with the cigarette this time, gaze steady. "No promises."
The silence that followed was different—tense and sharp, pero hindi naman entirely uncomfortable.
Then Miss Herrera looked away, flicking the cigarette again. "You really shouldn't be out here."
"Miss, sinabi mo na 'yan kanina."
"And yet nandito ka parin."
Kairi tilted her head. "Should I leave?"
Hindi agad sumagot si Miss Herrera.
She just looked at Kairi again, slower this time.
"No," she said eventually.
And Kairi stayed.