Chapter Sixteen
Ionian scale in C – Lyrics to Memories
My eyes create a memory for my heart:
My lips create a memory for my soul.
A love that was never meant to be is stronger
Thanks words can ever make it so.
—Isobeau de Shera de Wolfe, 15th c.
Wolfe’s Lair
“When is the last time you spoke to her?”
The softly uttered words came from Warenne.
Atticus, trying to fix a long-shafted spear tip that seemed to be coming loose, heard the question and knew exactly who Warenne was speaking of but, in truth, he wasn’t ready to acknowledge it.
Doing what he’d done as of late, he simply ignored the question.
“Who?” he asked, then deliberately moved to change the subject.
“Can you please have someone bring me more strips of leather? The smithy should have some. These spears are old but they are still serviceable. If Norfolk charges tonight, which all indications seem to be that we will have a second wave of their assault, then these spears will come in handy. So barbaric, though. I feel like a wild man pitching sharp sticks at my enemy.”
Warenne was fully aware that Atticus didn’t wish to speak of his wife; he’d spent six days refusing to discuss or address the woman.
Ever since Alrik du Reims’ lifeless body had been hurled over the massive stone walls, landing in a heap in front of his horrified comrades, Atticus had refused to even mention Isobeau’s name.
If Warenne hadn’t known better, he would have sworn there was agony in Atticus’ eyes over the situation with his wife.
Warenne knew that Lady de Wolfe had been distraught over Atticus’ killing of du Reims and he was fairly certain terrible words had been spoken between the two as a result, but so far, Atticus hadn’t said a word about it. He kept his mouth shut.
But his manner was growing increasingly bitter and snappish as the days went on.
He was professional and cool as always, and he had directed the defenses against Norfolk brilliantly, but as the days wore on, he seemed to grow more and more sullen.
Warenne suspected it was because Atticus was greatly distressed over his wife.
When he thought no one was looking, Atticus would glance back at the structure of Wolfe’s Lair in the direction of his mother’s former chamber where his wife now resided.
He thought no one had noticed but Warenne had.
Considering he was in anguish over what was happening with his own wife, Warenne well understood Atticus’ pain.
But Atticus wouldn’t speak of it and Warenne didn’t press, not until this morning when Atticus had practically shoved his father aside when the old man got in his way.
That was very unlike Atticus. Therefore, Warenne thought he’d better speak with Atticus and see if he could ease his mind, or at least help him reason through whatever he was feeling.
For all of their sakes, it had to be done.
The tension surrounding Atticus because of the siege, and because of issues with his wife, was growing to splitting proportions.
“I will have someone fetch the smithy,” Warenne replied belatedly to Atticus’ question. “He will bring the leather to you. Now, answer my question; when is the last time you spoke to your wife?”
Atticus didn’t look up from his task. “The day du Reims died.”
“Why have you not spoken to her since?”
“Because I have nothing to say.”
“Not even to check on her well-being?”
“The servants would tell me if anything was wrong.”
Warenne was becoming less understanding with Atticus and more irritated.
Foolishness always upset him and at this moment, he was under the opinion that Atticus was either being extremely cold or extremely foolish.
Reaching out, he stilled the man’s hands as they wrapped a strip of leather around the wobbling spear tip.
“Enough of this, Atticus,” he said, his voice low.
“When I should be heading home to speak with my wife, whom I would move the sun and moon to be with, I am here, at Wolfe’s Lair, watching you ignore a woman you are clearly fond of.
Do not give me that look; I’ve seen that cynicism before.
I’ve seen that aloof manner before, too.
I have watched you ignore Lady de Wolfe for the past six days and I am offended by it.
I am deeply offended by it. You have an opportunity to be with your wife, to resolve whatever issues are between you two, yet you have soundly ignored her.
I would give anything to be in your position with my wife only a few steps away from me, but I am not.
I must remain in this God-forsaken fortress and look at your ugly face all day long.
I am sick of it, do you hear? Now, stop acting like a foolish squire and go talk to the woman you married! ”
By the time he was finished, Warenne was rather animated, which was unusual for the usually-collected young earl.
Had Atticus not been so surprised by his tirade he would have been offended by it.
Or he would have laughed. As it was, he walked a fine line between defending himself and agreeing to Warenne’s demands.
“It is not so simple,” he told him, speaking hesitantly. “She does not wish to speak with me.”
“How do you know if you have not tried?”
“She told me to stay away and leave her alone.”
Warenne cooled somewhat. “So you are doing what you think she wants you to do?”
“Of course. If she does not want me near her, I will comply.”
Warenne let out a hiss and shook his head. “Do you know nothing about women?” he demanded. “She regretted what she said the moment it left her mouth. The longer you let this fester between you, the worse it will be.”
Atticus averted his gaze, looking back to the unsteady spear tip. After a moment, he sighed heavily. “I do not wish to speak of this, Ren,” he said. “I cannot be distracted from what is going on outside of the walls. Whatever is happening with Lady de Wolfe will have to wait until this is over.”
Warenne watched the man fidget with the spear.
“It may be too late,” he said quietly, glancing off to the southwest, the direction he intended to travel home.
“Trust me when I tell you that every day you delay may create damage that cannot be repaired. Unless, of course, she does not matter to you. Is it possible that you do not care what she thinks of you?”
Atticus merely shrugged. “It does not matter.”
“To you?”
Atticus exhaled sharply and looked at him.
“Why do you care?” he hissed, looking around to make sure no one heard their conversation.
“I will not be distracted with talk of Lady de Wolfe. She believes me a murderer and wants nothing to do with me, so I have remained here on the wall, allowing her privacy in her chamber. That is the way of things, Ren. I would appreciate it if you would stop asking about it.”
Warenne could see the pain in Atticus’ expression as he spoke of Isobeau, but it was pain that Atticus would never acknowledge.
Either he didn’t truly recognize it or he was too proud to admit it.
Therefore, Warenne backed off on his approach.
He watched as Atticus returned to his spear, leaning against the stone wall behind him, noting that sunset wasn’t far off.
The earl’s gaze was distant, reflective, as he gazed into the darkening sky.
“The moon will be full this night,” he said casually, looking up to the surprisingly clear sky. “It will be as bright as day.”
“I know.”
Warenne glanced at him. “They will come tonight, you know,” he said.
“If it were me, I would launch a night attack with flaming projectiles and flaming arrows. Have you noticed that they’ve been collecting animal fat for days now?
They have it simmering over a big iron pot off towards the far east of the encampment. ”
Atticus nodded. “I know,” he said. “We have been soaking the roofs of the stables and outbuildings with water to ensure they do not burn.”
Warenne looked at him. “What about men, Atticus?” he asked quietly. “Men burn.”
“And the men will all remain inside, under cover, until the barrage is over,” he replied steadily. Then, he paused and looked at his friend. “What are you driving at, Ren? What are you thinking?”
Warenne sighed faintly, looking off to the west and to the muted colors of sunset across the expanse of sky.
“I am thinking that I should speak with my brother-in-law to see if we can resolve this,” he said.
“They can hold out indefinitely and we cannot. Already supplies are running low. Would you have your wife starve to death in a fortress under siege?”
Atticus wasn’t particularly agreeable to what he was saying. “We can manage with what we have for quite some time,” he said. “They’ll not starve us out any time soon.”
Warenne shrugged. “Mayhap not,” he said.
“But I want to go home and see my wife, and you have a task to see through. De la Londe and de Troiu are somewhere in this country and you must find them and make them atone for Titus’ murder.
We do not have time to be wasting here on the borders while Norfolk’s knights lay siege. This needs to end.”
Atticus stopped fussing with the spear and hung his head, thinking of his brother.
He grunted ironically. “It all seems so long ago,” he muttered.
“Titus’ death, my vow of vengeance. Nothing has gone as I have planned; not my determination to punish those bastards who killed my brother nor the marriage to Titus’ widow that seemed like a very bad idea from the start.
Now I find myself holding off a siege and married to a woman who wants nothing to do with me. This is not how it was supposed to be.”
Warenne watched him carefully. “And you want nothing to do with her?”
It was a leading question. Atticus knew very well that it was a leading question, but his guard was down. He was feeling momentarily confused and vulnerable. After a moment, he shook his head.