Preston
"Why do I feel like this is just an excuse to get me naked?" Vadim asks, grinning slyly from ear to ear.
"Warm baths are good for your recovery," I inform him.
"Learn that in your physical therapy degree, did you?"
"Just shut up and keep getting undressed please."
He obeys, and I do my best to hide my own grin.
Secretly, I'm glad his corny humor is returning. I'm taking it as a sign he's feeling better.
After staying in the hospital for another day for monitoring, Vadim was released this morning. He's out of immediate danger but still incredibly sore.
And weak.
Walking more than a few steps really takes it out of him. I hate seeing him like this, so I'm determined to take care of him until he's fully recovered.
"What about one of your awesome massages? I could really go for one of those," he says, latching onto my wrist, coming up so close to me his face is all I can see.
I do everything I can to absorb every last tiny detail while I'm still barely able to. His dark hair that's grown out in a wicked tangle and now rivals mine in the unruly stakes, a far cry from the perfectly styled, not-a-strand-out-of-place style he had when we first met.
The rough stubble shadowing his jaw.
His hard, unforgiving gray eyes that soften ever so slightly every single time they land on me.
I trace my finger down the bridge of his nose, lingering over the slight bend where it must have been broken once.
"That is off the table for another week, mister."
I checked with the doctor about it. He confirmed what I suspected, that massage would be potentially counterproductive at this early stage of his recovery.
Vadim's muscles have been through severe involuntary spasms and are extremely tender and inflamed.
Applying any sort of pressure to them would only cause him more pain than he's already in.
The doctor advised waiting at least a week before applying touch.
So for now, it's warm baths and lots of rest.
"And that's at the very earliest and depends on how you're feeling," I add.
Vadim lets out an overdramatic sigh.
"I have a massage therapist boyfriend who's only ever given me one massage. Surely there's got to be someone I can complain to about that," he grumbles good-naturedly as he continues getting undressed.
I check the water for temperature then turn the taps off.
"It's funny, I never knew that Vadim was Polish for Karen."
He chuckles then winces as he bends over and slowly peels off his socks, his last item of clothing.
I offered to help him undress. He said he wanted me near but that he wanted to do it himself.
I get that.
He wants to get back to normal as quickly as possible. What he needs to realize, though, is that he has literally ingested poison, and his body is going to need some time to recuperate.
"Will you join me at least?"
"I can't. You've seen my phone. I have, like, seven thousand missed calls from Ellie. He probably wants to know where I am and if I'll ever be home again." I tap the rim of the bath. "Get in. Now."
Vadim moves closer. "Can we talk about your home situation?"
"What about it?"
"I'd like to raise a motion."
"Is that what you call this?" I close my fingers around the base of his cock. Even with my eyesight deteriorating, there's no way I could miss it lengthening as soon as Vadim peeled off his briefs.
"Well…" He chuckles darkly. "If you really want to look after me…"
"I do. And I will take care of you."
He moves in closer.
The head of his cock nudges my abdomen.
"All of me?"
"Yes. That part later, though. For now, get into the bath. I've added magnesium and bath salts, which your muscles will love."
The muscle currently pressing against my body pulses, the heat of him pressing insistently through the material of my T-shirt and seeping into my skin.
I shake my head, unable to not smile. Humor and now horniness, yeah, he's on his way to making a full recovery.
"Get. In. Now," I demand.
A low rumble finds its way through the small gap in his lips.
"Hm. I like this bossy side of you." He grabs his now fully erect cock and thwacks it a couple of times against his palm. "See?"
"Barely," I joke, which is enough to shut him up and get him into the bath on the double.
A long, drawn-out groan fills the air as he sinks into the warm water.
My own cock twitches in my pants, but I'm determined to keep this professional. The fun stuff can happen later, but only if he's up for it. Although, knowing Vadim, he could be in excruciating pain and on the verge of death and that still wouldn't hold him back from fucking me.
But I also do feel like shit for missing all of Ellie's calls today. I have to get back to him.
"So…about your living situation," Vadim says once he's settled in the bath.
"Yes?"
"I've been thinking, and I'd like for you to move in with me."
"Oh." I'm not sure what my face is doing, but he's definitely caught me by surprise. "Wow."
"Not what you were expecting?"
"No. I thought you'd bring it back to your dick in some way."
Vadim clears his throat. "I'm serious, Pres. I've been reflecting about…us."
"What about us?"
"Everything, really. Going right back to the start.
The way we met. The crazy shit that happened to you and your house.
Spending months apart while you were with your family.
If you think about it, none of that sounds conducive to starting a relationship, but, here we are.
I fell in love with you because even though we were physically apart, we talked to each other every single night for several months.
We probably got to know each other better that way than if you'd stayed in Reno.
And now that you're back, I can't just see you a few times a week.
I want to be with you every day." He reaches for my hand. "And besides, you saved me."
I wave my other hand dismissively. "I did not."
"You did," he reiterates, his tone leaving no room for argument. "If you hadn't found me when you did, I wouldn't be here, naked, soaking in a tub, asking my boyfriend to move in with me."
I take my hand back and wipe it down the side of my jeans. "It's not that simple."
"Why not?"
"Well, for starters, I'm going to need to make modifications. Big ones. Ellie's been looking at it from an interior design perspective with furniture and layouts, and…"
"And what?"
"I don't want you to go to any trouble for me."
"Preston." Vadim reaches his arms out of the tub and cups my face in his warm, wet hands. "Remember when I said that we're in this together?"
Pressure constricts my chest.
"I do," I say quietly.
"Well, those weren't just words. I meant them. Let me show you how much I meant them. Please. Move in here. Let's make this your home as much as it is mine. Whatever changes or modifications we need to do, we'll do them."
"I just hate—"
"Accepting help?"
I nod.
"Yeah," I whisper.
"Well, then, I guess I'm screwed."
"Huh?"
"I need your help now until I get better, and I guess since you don't like accepting help, that means I can't accept your help. If that's how it is."
"Of course that's not how it is. I like helping you."
"It's not too much of a burden?"
"No."
"Not too much trouble? Or an inconvenience? Or something you're just doing out of obligation?"
I lean back, realizing too late the trap he's set that I've walked straight into.
"You can't compare the two situations, Vadim. You're going to need my help for a few weeks max. My condition is for the rest of my life."
"So?"
"So? So?"
I'm sure there are a hundred arguments for that, but for some reason, my brain can't come up with any right this very minute.
"Look, I'm not saying we're going to be together forever in case you've gone there and are freaking out about that," Vadim says, guessing wrongly.
"But I do want to be with you, whether it's for a month, a year, or the rest of our lives.
I'm committed to you and to us. So let me in, Pres.
Let me be there for you the way you're there for me.
We're a team, mój kochany. That's how this boyfriend thing works. "
I pull back, my cheeks wet from his touch.
In my head, what he's saying makes complete sense.
I hear it.
I understand it.
I just can't seem to make myself believe it.
Teamwork is the foundation of a solid, healthy relationship. My parents set a great example when it came to working together. Even when they made mistakes, like with the way they handled Shannon's adoption, it was something they took accountability for together.
But there's something in me, some sort of block, that prevents my heart from being able to fully get on board with it.
"What's going on, Pres? Talk to me."
I fumble around for the small stool and sit down on it since my legs are starting to go numb from the crouching. I don't even know where to start, so I just open my mouth, and whatever comes out, comes out.
"Mom once asked me what I was most afraid of when it came to losing my sight," I begin, recalling a conversation I had with her when I got my latest diagnosis, before I banned the topic from being raised.
"She assumed it was not being able to see anything, the world going black, and how hard it would be to navigate that. But that's not what is for me."
I pause, take a breath, and collect my thoughts.
"I've always had poor vision, and I knew that one day it would be gone forever.
Admittedly, I thought I'd be closer to sixty-five than twenty-five when it happened, but still, in the back of my mind, I guess I was in some way mentally preparing myself for that eventuality someday. "
"Is that why you didn't wear glasses?"
"Bingo. I felt like what's the point of knowing what perfect vision was like if I was only going to lose it some day?"
A beat of silence follows.
"So what is it that scares you the most?" Vadim asks gently.
I rest my forearms against the side of the tub, my fingertip dipping into the warm water.
"Relying on other people," I reply with a glum smile.
"You've seen it for yourself. I'm fiercely independent.
Always have been. And in some ways, that's a good thing.
I just think where the wires got crossed is that along the way, I equated needing help with weakness.
That's why when I got this latest diagnosis, I kept powering through with my life.
I kept working, kept studying, kept telling myself I was doing it because I needed to support myself and set myself up for my future when really, I was deluding myself. "
"I'm not sure I follow. People without vision can still work, right?"
I blow out a breath. "Yeah, but…"
"But what?”
"It's harder. Accommodations need to be made, and in all honesty, most employers don't want that burden. It takes up too much time and effort and money when they can just hire someone who doesn't have these issues. Why would anyone choose to take the harder route when they don't have to?"
"Because you're worth it." Vadim reaches out and takes my hand in his.
"Because what you think of as problems, some people might see as opportunities to support you, to champion you, to show you how much they care for you and how much you mean to them.
And sure, there may be a bit more work involved, especially at the start to set things up, but they know that it's worth it.
That letting you shine and be the best, truest version of yourself makes life a little bit better. "
My eyes fill with tears.
I can't process Vadim's words entirely all at once, but I do my best to remember them so that I can draw on them for when I need strength and reassurance later.
"I need you to stop thinking of yourself as an inconvenience and a problem," he goes on. "And I want you to start thinking of yourself the way I see you. As my equal. As someone who's on the same team as me. As someone who's got my back just as much as I've got yours."
Tears spill down my face.
"That's what I want, too. I just don't know if I can make the switch like that."
"There's no rush, mój kochany." His fingertips glide along my jawline. "We'll go at your pace. And that goes for moving in as well. If it's too soon, or it doesn't feel right for you, just tell me, and we can shelve it for now."
"No. I want to."
"Are you sure? You can take some time to—"
I cut his words off with a kiss, almost toppling into the bath in the process.
I'm more sure of this than I am of anything, even if I will still need some time to get the hang of this whole relying-on-others thing.
But I trust Vadim.
I feel safe with him.
And there's a small voice inside me that's urging me to take the plunge and move in with him. Telling me that somehow, we will find a way to make it work, no matter what obstacles we come up against.
"I'm sure," I murmur against his lips. "Now you stay in here and soak while I go break the news to Ellie."