Chapter 18
CHAPTER 18
Honey brown eyes stare up at me in awe over a heaping mound of chocolate ice cream. “You’re the girl from the other night,” Jamie says to me before looking to his mother for confirmation.
Smiling warmly at her son, Megan ruffles his hair. “That’s right, Sprout.”
Sprout.
My heart launches into my throat, choking me at my father’s own nickname for me.
I look down at my own mint chocolate chip and try to collect myself before tears and emotion fully takes over.
Immediately, Holden’s hand finds mine beneath the table and gives it a reassuring squeeze. Like he knows.
Of course he knows.
He knows me better than anyone. And he always has.
“And she’s an old friend from college, too?” Jamie asked, looking at me skeptically.
Megan’s lips thinned momentarily, but she quickly nodded. “Sort of. She was Holden’s friend in college and I met her back then, too.”
“And now she’s your girlfriend,” Jamie states, looking at Holden and me for confirmation.
“That’s right,” Holden says.
Jamie nods, seemingly satisfied with this answer. “Mom, can I go play on the jungle gym?” he asks, pointing at the playplace in the center of the ice cream shop.
“Sure, sweetie.”
With a kiss to the top of his head, he bounces out of his seat and takes off at full speed toward the slide.
And then, it’s just Megan, Holden, and me, sitting awkwardly with our rapidly melting ice cream.
“So…” Megan says, catching a dollop of whipped cream on her spoon. “We should probably do the paternity test soon.”
“Actually,” Holden says after clearing his throat, “Katherine and I were talking and… well, with my dad not wanting any part of his life, I’m not sure a paternity test is needed.”
Megan’s eyes narrow. “You don’t want the paternity test now?” she whispers, her voice venomous.
“Not because I don’t want to know!” Holden clarifies quickly. “But because I don’t care if I’m biologically his dad or not. We’d like to be a part of your family, Katherine and I. One way or another, he’s mine and just because my dad doesn’t want to step up doesn’t mean I won’t. I want to be his father regardless of what the test says.”
Her eyes shift to me. “And you’re okay with this?”
Slowly, I nod. “I love Holden. And any part of Holden’s life is part of my life.”
“And vice versa,” he clarifies with another squeeze of my hand.
“But he might be your brother ,” Megan says.
“Maybe,” Holden says carefully. “But the important thing is he’s family. And regardless of how he’s family, guardians and parents can take many forms, right?”
Megan seems to regard us for the longest breath known to man. “I suppose. What about when he's older though? Don't you think he'll want to know who his real father is someday?"
At this, Holden falters. "I...I don't know. I haven't thought that far ahead." He runs a hand through his hair anxiously. "You're right, he probably will want answers eventually. But we can cross that bridge when we come to it, can’t we?”
Megan crosses her arms, fixing Holden with a piercing gaze. "And what will you tell him then? That you were too scared to face the truth?"
Holden bristles at the accusation. "No, of course not. I'll tell him… that I chose to be his father no matter what. That DNA doesn't determine who cares for you and loves you. That's what matters most."
My eyes drift over to the playplace where Jamie was clambering up the plastic steps, oblivious to the grown-up drama unfolding at our table. He’s such a happy, carefree kid. This news could completely rock his world if not handled delicately.
As I watch Jamie zoom down the curly slide, laughter spilling from his lips, my heart aches. He’s so innocent right now. The worry creeps over me that he isn't ready for this truth. That he might resent all of us adults for keeping it from him.
Megan's eyes flash as she listens to Holden's response, her lips pressed into a thin line.
But she doesn’t say another word.
Unnerved, I glance at Holden. I don’t know Megan well, but I can tell that something about our interaction today isn’t sitting right with her.
“I hope you know we’re not looking to replace you,” I say quietly as my eyes once again find Jamie. He’s hopped off the swings, allowing another kid to play on it and is pushing her instead. “He’s a great kid and Holden and I just want to be part of his life. We’re family… and that includes you.” Her gaze snaps to mine and softens slightly when she follows my line of sight to Jamie.
“It’s, um, it’s just a lot to process,” she says quietly. “A couple weeks ago, it was just me and Jamie and I had fully sworn off the Dorseys. Your dad had made it very clear that I was to never contact you again after your mother’s funeral. So when I was invited to the theater, knowing Erik was a producer, I thought maybe he’d had a change of heart and wanted you to know the truth.”
“I had no idea Jamie existed, Megan. You have to believe me.”
“Oh, I do,” she says with a roll of her eyes. “But I also know how cutthroat your dad can be and I don’t want Jamie to ever see that side of your family.”
“I don’t want Jamie to see that either. I promise you, he doesn’t ever have to meet or see my father?—”
“How?” she cuts Holden off. “How can you promise that?”
Holden’s jaw goes tight, twitching and I drop my gaze to find him fidgeting with his grandfather’s spinner ring nervously.
Reaching over, I rest my hand on his thigh giving him a reassuring squeeze.
“And…” she adds after a pause before looking at me. “I hate to have to say this, but Kate, you’re not part of this family. Not yet at least. So these decisions need to be between me and Holden. And maybe Erik. That’s it.”
His thigh muscles bunch, turning hard beneath my palm.
“Wait a minute—” he snaps.
“It’s okay,” I interrupt quickly.
Both of them glance at me in shock. “Katherine, don’t say that?—”
“Really, Holden. It is okay. Megan’s right. I’m not one of Jamie’s parents. I’m not his stepmom. So I respect what she means. As long as I can have some sort of relationship with him… the cool friend of the family maybe? I’m okay with that. For now.”
Megan blinks rapidly and nods. “Thank you.”
“No,” Holden says again, staring at me with his mouth gaping open.
“Holden,” I whisper. “Don’t ruin your relationship with your son over this. We’ll be fine?—”
He turns and looks at Megan, taking my hand from his leg and lacing his fingers into mine. He brings our hands to the table, leaning in and looking at Megan. “I love Katherine and she isn’t going anywhere. She is part of my family. We may not be engaged yet, but she will be Jamie’s stepmom sooner than later… if she’ll have me.”
A gasp clutches my lungs. “Did you just… are you proposing?”
“No,” Holden clarifies quickly. A smile slowly forms on his mouth, softening the firm lines at his brow. “I’m definitely not proposing to you in front of my ex at an ice cream joint.” He pauses, his glistening whiskey eyes latching onto mine. “But it’s coming. Soon. So get ready.”
Megan clears her throat and stands, grabbing her purse from the back of her chair. “I… I have to think. There’s a lot to consider here.” She slings her purse over her shoulder, pausing to look between us for a beat. “But… you two are really good together. Holden, you seem happier than I’ve ever seen you.”
She turns abruptly on her heel, calling over to the playplace. “Jamie! Time to go.”
She shoots Holden one more withering look.
Jamie's head pops up from the ball pit, his eyes wide. "But I don't wanna go yet!"
" Now , Jamie," Megan repeats firmly. "Say goodbye to Holden and Kate."
Jamie's lip quivers but he drags himself over to us. "Why do we have to leave? Holden didn’t show me his Pokemon cards yet.”
“Next time, buddy,” Holden says, ruffling his hair.
Jamie looks up at me, his eyes filling with tears. “Will you bring your Pokemon cards, too?”
“Of course,” I say as cheerfully as I can.
Jamie shoves his hands into his pockets, scuffing his toe along the floor. “Okay. Thanks for the ice cream,” he mumbles, not meeting our eyes.
Megan takes his hand and leads him away without another word. Jamie looks back at us, confused and crestfallen.
As they exit, the bell above the door tinkles, marking their departure. Holden and I remain seated, the weight of the unspoken lingering between us like a thick fog. Our ice cream has melted into a sticky soup, forgotten in the midst of emotional turmoil. The shop seems quieter now, the echo of Jamie’s laughter haunting me.
Holden pulls me into his arms. "It'll be okay," he murmurs into my hair. "We'll figure this out."
But despite Holden’s pronouncement of intending to marry me, I can’t help the uneasy feeling gnawing at my stomach.
I look at Holden, his face a map of worry and determination. "We can't let it end like this," I say softly.
He nods, gripping my hands tighter. "We won’t," he promises. “This situation doesn’t have to be complicated. People blend their families all the time, as long as we all have the common goal of Jamie’s happiness and well-being, it’ll be fine.”
Out of nowhere, his phone buzzes aggressively on the table. Holden glances at it and goes pale.
"What is it?" I ask, my heart pounding with renewed dread.
He doesn't respond straight away as his thumb hovers over the screen. But then he looks up at me with an intensity that chills my blood.
Swallowing, he places the phone on the table and slowly slides it over to me to read. “It just got complicated.”