Chapter 10 #3
The officiant was an older man with kind eyes. He started reading the ceremony - the words about love and commitment and partnership. Then he asked us both if we took each other to be husband and wife.
"I do," I said, and my voice was steady. This was the one thing that I didn’t even need to think twice about. Had you asked me this weeks ago, that would have been a different story.
Kaseem opened his mouth to say his "I do" but then he stopped.
"Wait," he said. "Let me say this."
He turned to face me fully, still holding my hand, and I could see something in his eyes that made my chest tight.
"Tattiana, I've always been the nigga to believe that everything happens for a reason," he said, his voice steady and real.
"And I know that's true for why you came into my life.
In this short amount of time you're teaching me how to care about someone other than myself.
I won't lie, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing as a husband, but every day, I'm willing to wake up and try. "
People were quiet. Even the string quartet seemed to have softened their playing.
"I know life been dealing you a fucked up hand," he continued, and I felt tears start to form.
"But I hope you can trust me enough to lay everything on me and let me handle it. I know I may fall short, but all I ask is that you correct a nigga and give me a chance to get it right. I'm all in, and I need you to know that. I want this shit bad as I’ve ever wanted anything and I’m ready to show you that.
" He spoke and Namier looked down, shaking his head in disbelief with a light smirk on his face.
He wasn't finished but I couldn't wait another second.
I kissed him.
Not soft. Not gentle. Deep and real and like I was trying to show him everything I was feeling that I didn't have words for.
He grabbed my face and kissed me back just as hard, and for a moment it was just us in that garden.
The officiant laughed, a deep laugh that broke the tension and made everyone else laugh too.
"Well," he said, shaking his head, "there you have it. You may kiss the bride." He said sarcastically.
"You know I had to do that," Kaseem said without breaking his smile, and the whole garden erupted in cheers.
We held hands and walked back through the garden together. My friends were crying - actual tears running down their faces. Kaseem squeezed my hand one more time before he went off to talk to Namier, giving me time with my girls.
Nyla immediately tried to grab Namier's arm to speak with him, her face lighting up like she wanted to share this moment with him.
He shook her off.
"I'm good," he said, and something in his voice made it clear that wasn't an invitation for conversation.
Nyla's face fell and she stepped back like he'd physically pushed her away.
I pulled her close before she could spiral.
"Something serious happened with their brother and the family is going through something right now," I told her quietly. "Give him time. It's not about you, I promise. He’s dealing with personal things.”
She nodded but I could see the hurt sitting in her eyes. We'd have to talk about this later.
For now, we took pictures. So many pictures with the photographer. Me and my girls, me and Kaseem, Kaseem with his brother, all of us together. The sun kept getting lower and lower, painting everything in gold.
Then a beautiful horse and carriage pulled up.
Kaseem came over and told me it was for us.
My mouth dropped. The carriage was pristine white with gold details, and the horses were black as night with white plumes on their heads.
Nyla and River practically shoved me toward it, squealing and taking more pictures.
That's when I noticed them - four black trucks that pulled up and surrounded the carriage. Security. Real, visible security that made it clear this wasn't just a beautiful moment. It was a protected one.
I looked at Kaseem, worry crossing my face.
"Is it safe for us to take the ride if you gotta do all that? Do we really need this much protection for a carriage ride?” I asked, gesturing to the trucks.
He stepped closer to me and took my face in his hands.
"This your big day," he said simply. "I'd die before letting anything happen to you. Trust that. As far as us being protected, hell! That’s something I have to do. Don’t let that take away from this moment.”
We got into the carriage and he pulled me close, his arm around my waist. The horses started moving and we rode through the garden as the sun finished setting, the candlelit pathways lighting our way.
Then we left the arboretum and rode through downtown Dallas. The city lights were coming on, reflecting off the buildings, and I was in a carriage next to my husband riding through the place we both called home.
This was real.
I was Tattiana Carter now.
And as we rode through the streets with security surrounding us, I realized that I wasn't scared of any of it. Not the trucks. Not the danger that those trucks implied. Not the reality of what being married to Kaseem actually meant.
I just held onto him and enjoyed the ride.
This was my muthafuckin husband, and I was gone stand beside him.