Chapter 16 #2
Before she went upstairs, she checked her breakfast preparations. She’d baked so there’d be bread to accompany chops from the deer Lee brought over. Leftover potatoes were ready for slicing and frying.
She wandered to the sitting room to put away the checker game. The spines of the books bumped beneath her touch as she ran her fingers along them.
More and more, she saw Jace being drawn back into ranch life…in the way he cleaned up the remains of the barn, in the way he arranged for meat for them to eat, in his interest in teaching Eddie.
Was it enough? What could she do to make it more? Was that why she was allowing those stolen kisses? Except they weren’t stolen, they were freely given.
Pushing aside her troublesome thoughts, she climbed the stairs and prepared for bed. She sat on the mattress and opened her Bible. She read a few verses, then knelt by her bed.
Lord, guide me. My fondness for Jace is growing. You know that. I want him to stay and not solely to run the ranch. Lord, I want him to stay for me. For Eddie. I need Your strength and wisdom to follow the right path.
The next morning, she was up before Eddie and slipped down to the kitchen.
She had put the chops to fry when his feet hit the floor. “Mama!”
“Get dressed and come down.”
He clattered down the stairs, his trousers unbuttoned, his shirt on crooked.
“Hang on while I straighten you out.”
He barely stood still long enough for her to adjust his clothes. Then he was at the door, begging her to lift the bar and let him out.
“Eddie, they might still be sleeping.”
“No. They’s men. They’s up.”
She chuckled. “It appears you think men go to work before daylight.” The sky was pink with the promise of dawn.
“A man does his work.”
The words were no doubt a quote from something Jace had said, and pleasure as sweet as the call of a dove reached into her thoughts.
The following days fell into a routine of meals shared at the house, Cal and Lee helping Jace—and Eddie, of course—clean up the barn site. She kept busy with cooking, baking, and canning the meat.
Each evening, Jace joined her for tea and a visit, eagerly tucking Eddie into bed before he and Dianne went to the sitting room. Never once did he win at a game of checkers, even when she almost gave the play to him.
When she protested, he silenced her with a look of denial or a shrug. Seldom did he kiss her again. As if he read her mind about what it meant and didn’t want her to have the wrong idea.
Unfortunately, it was too late on her behalf. More and more, she dreamed of him staying, even though she warned herself she was asking for a broken heart to think along those lines.
One evening, she sat on the bottom step waiting for Jace to come down from tucking in Eddie.
“You always be here?” Her son’s voice came to her clearly, demanding an answer.
She sat motionless to hear Jace’s reply.
He took a long time to speak. “Eddie, I wish I could promise that, but I can’t.”
Her heart hit bottom with a thud. She stilled her disappointment as Jace continued.
“None of us lives forever. We only have as many days as God grants us.”
“Like my papa and gramps? They’s dead already.”
“Something like that.” Was that uncertainty?
“Did God sends you instead?”
The innocent question and silence stalled her thoughts.
Would he acknowledge it was part of God’s plan? But would that include Chet’s death? She couldn’t go down that trail. It was impossible to believe God had used Jace in such a troublesome manner.
Jace murmured something she couldn’t make out. Hearing him close the door, she hurried to the kitchen to pour tea.
Would he mention his conversation with Eddie?
She put cookies on a plate and handed him a cup of tea. He didn’t say anything, but she didn’t want to let it go.
“Eddie is getting attached to the place.”
Jace angled his hip against the cupboard, making no movement toward the sitting room. “Guess that’s an indication you should stay.”
She’d never planned anything else. There were no options for her just as there was no point in reminding him of that fact and the bigger one—that she couldn’t manage the ranch on her own.
“He’s growing fond of you as well.” Her gaze steady, challenging, and perhaps hopeful; she didn’t shift from his study.
“He’s a nice little boy.” He eased away from her. “You ready for another game of checkers?”
Her chin jutted out. “Only if you play honestly.”
“Are you accusing me of cheating?” His mild tone might have been teasing or denial. But all she saw was his back, so she couldn’t tell.
“At least try and win.”
Balancing his tea on the nearby table, he unfolded the checkerboard and set out the pieces—red for her, black for him—and sat back to study her.
“Aren’t you enjoying the evenings?”
“Of course I am.” The heat in her cheeks likely glowed pink.
“Then what does it matter who wins or loses?”
She lowered her gaze lest he read her silent admission that it was his company she enjoyed. The game was but an excuse to spend a few hours with him. “There’s something true about that.”
“You go first.”
They played for several minutes until he cleared the board in one move.
“I won.” He raised his hands as he cheered.
She laughed. “I wasn’t paying attention.”
“I won fair and square.” He readied the pieces for another game.
Peering into his eyes, she said, “I got used to you playing sloppily.” Would he kiss her? Did she want him to?
He tweaked her chin. “Guess you better pay attention.”
The next game was a deadlock as they both concentrated on each play.
He didn’t set out the checkers again. Instead, he settled back to study her.
Would he say something about their future? Their shared future?
“Eddie’s a great little boy. Eager to learn. He’ll do well on the ranch.”
Her tea was gone. The cookies were eaten. She didn’t want to talk about Eddie’s opportunities.
Jace drained his cup and pushed to his feet. “I’ll bid you good night.” He carried his cup to the kitchen. “Be sure to bar the door.” And like that, he was gone.
Annoyance scratching like a hot burr under her shirtwaist, she followed him to the door. He had rushed away like he regretted any shared kisses. And added a warning that reminded her of Al as if to keep her wary.
Was he doing it all on purpose? Trying to discourage her? Was it his way of warning her things hadn’t changed in his mind?