Chapter 30 Abeni Mensah #3
Treasure continued, “You have been holding on to that baby because deep down you are a mother, and you know what it is to lose, and you know what it is to fear loss. You also know that taking a child from his mother is something that will haunt you, even if you never show it.”
I exhaled slowly. “You assume I am haunted.”
Treasure’s eyes stayed on mine. “You are. It is written all over you, and I can see it because I have known you since we were girls.”
I tried to speak, but for the first time in a long time, words did not come easily.
Treasure’s tone shifted slightly, still gentle, but more direct. “You are so used to ruling with an iron fist that you don’t always notice how heavy your hand can be. You don’t always notice how far you have gone until you are standing alone with the aftermath.”
My jaw tightened slightly, but I didn’t argue, although arguing would have been easier than admitting she was right.
“Pressure survived,” Treasure said. “He healed. He married Pluto. He had more children. The life you were trying to protect continued, and the rage that fueled you then is not the same rage you carry now.”
I swallowed. “You think my rage dissolved.”
“I think your pain changed,” Treasure replied. “I think you were in survival then, and now you are in reflection, even if you don’t want to admit it.”
The word reflection made me uncomfortable, but I didn’t correct her.
Treasure stepped closer and lowered her voice. “I see the real you under all that armor. I have always seen her. You have a good heart, Abeni, but you keep it behind power because power has always protected you.”
I turned my head toward her. “Do not romanticize me. I’m not gentle.”
Treasure’s lips curved into a smile. “No, you are not gentle, but you are not evil either. You are a woman who loves fiercely, and sometimes that love turns into something sharp.”
That sentence sat in my spirit because it felt like the truth I had been avoiding.
Treasure continued, “You know giving Kashmere her child back almost a year later feels insane. You know your pride will scream at you. You know guilt will rise up too, because returning him will feel like surrender, and you don’t surrender.”
My eyes stayed on the flowers, but my mind was not there anymore.
Treasure’s voice softened again. “But you can return him, and if you want to, it will be okay. You can clear your conscience, and you can still be the woman you have always been. Doing the right thing doesn’t make you weak.”
I laughed, but there was no humor in it. “The world would not see it that way.”
“The world doesn’t matter. Not in this.”
I turned to her. “You speak as if it is simple.”
“It is not simple, but it is clear.”
I stared at her, and for the first time in a long time, I allowed myself to look conflicted in front of someone. Treasure was the only woman alive who could hold my gaze like that and not fear me, because she loved me more than she feared me.
“What would you have me do?” I asked, my tone calm even as something deep in me trembled.
Treasure did not hesitate. “I would have you make a plan, and I would have you return that child to his mother in a way that does not put him in danger. I would have you do it with care, and I would have you do it soon, before your heart attaches any deeper.”
My chest tightened at the word soon.
I looked down at the flowers again, then back up at the mansion. From this distance, it looked untouchable. It looked like a place where nothing bad could happen, and yet I knew better. Pain could live anywhere, and guilt could sit behind any door.
“I don’t know if I can do it,” I admitted, and the honesty tasted unfamiliar on my tongue.
Treasure’s face softened, and she reached out and touched my hand.
“Yes, you can,” she said. “You have done harder things than this. You have survived losses that would have ruined other women. You have carried a nation on your back and never allowed it to bend you. Returning that baby will not destroy you. It will free you.”
I blinked slowly, keeping my face composed even as my eyes grew warm. I looked out over the yard again, over the flowers pushing up through soil, over the light fading into evening, and I felt something shift inside me that I did not like, but I could not ignore it.
For once, I didn’t know what I wanted more; to keep holding on to what I had taken, or to finally set it down and breathe without that weight pressing on my spirit.
Treasure squeezed my hand once. “You don’t have to decide in this moment, but you do have to stop pretending you don’t feel it.”
I nodded slowly, and my voice came out low. “I feel it.”
Treasure’s eyes held mine, and she spoke softly, like she was giving me permission to be human. “Then that is the beginning.”
We stood there together in the quiet, two women who had grown into power, motherhood, and womanhood, and for the first time in a long time, I felt the edge of my own certainty begin to soften, but I didn’t know whether I should be relieved or afraid.