Chapter 30
Chapter Thirty
Chrissy
I ’m his.
I never belonged to anyone before. My heart was always mine. I kept control and wouldn’t allow myself to fall headfirst because the love I sought was out of reach. Now I’m falling, and I know Rome won’t let me collide with the ground. He’ll catch me, hold me in his arms, and whisper reassuring words until I believe everything he says.
When he looks at me, it feels like he’s committing me to memory.
I reach out and trace my knuckles over his sculpted jawline. His breathing is relaxed, and his nose crinkles occasionally while he sleeps.
Contentment seeps into my muscles. I have him. I am his, and he is mine. The man who has plagued my mind for seven months is finally with me, and I couldn’t be happier. Everything is going in the direction I only dared wish it would. Zack was a massive bump in the road. At least, I thought he was going to be. Turns out he was a tiny obstacle, and our stubbornness was the biggest barrier. I don’t allow the worry of my curse to resurface and ruin the moment. I push it to the back of my mind.
Rome and I should have been up front with our feelings, acknowledged them, and spoken to Zack like the adults we think we are. Rome took the step while I cowered. I claim to be an adult who can make big-girl decisions, yet I haven’t made a single one yet. I have a lot of internal work I want to focus on, and I honestly think this is my first step.
The rain stopped pelting against the window about an hour ago. My body and mind are tired, but every time I close my eyes, I open them because I want to soak in this moment. I need to go to the bathroom though. I slip out of his bed, and chills coat my skin. Thankfully, Rome is a typical guy and he has clothes on his floor. I reach for a stray Castle Brook football jersey and do a quick sniff test. His natural musk and cologne fill my nostrils. I put it on and hurry toward his adjoining bathroom.
This was my first experience without a condom, and the first time anyone has ever come inside me. I’m not typically so reckless. Yes, I’m on the pill, but I follow precautions. The pill doesn’t protect me against STIs or STDs, and I don’t trust any of these college boys, except Rome. I don’t know for certain that he’s ever gone without protection, but I’m willing to bet the last thing he wants is to impregnate someone before he graduates. And I know he wouldn’t knowingly pass something onto me. Hell, it was my idea for him to finish inside me.
Before I finish peeing, I rake my hands across my scalp. Without looking in the mirror, I wash my hands and then stand there, unsure if I want to look at my reflection.
Be a big girl.
Inching my gaze upward, I meet my parallel self, and I do the unexpected. I smile at myself. My lips are swollen from kissing Rome. My cheeks are stained pink from all the blushing I did today. My hair is a mess, but when isn’t it? I move my gaze down, and my fingers dance along the stitching across the jersey. The number 35 is red, and the rest of the fabric is black. I turn around and look over my shoulder. His last name is on my back, and I dare to imagine something out of character for me.
Chrissy Carter.
Has a nice ring to it . . .
I walk back into the bedroom. The carpet is warm under my feet, and a small smile spreads across my lips when I see Rome sleeping peacefully. My body is itching to curl up next to him, but my restless mind wants me to explore. I still don’t know much about the blond man across from me. Other than how his mom left him and his dad when he was eight. What was he like when he was a kid? What is his dad like? What does Rome do other than play football and eat food?
If Rome has a roommate, he’s either oblivious or not home. Rome and I barreled through the door without a care in the world, so I assume he doesn’t have a roommate because he wouldn’t do something like that.
I peer out of the bedroom before starting down the hall and running my hand along the wall. I note the lack of decor, but it doesn’t raise any flags. I wouldn’t expect him to have decorated. One, because he’s a man, and two, because he barely has free time. Especially with Malik being a shit leader.
The kitchen is quaint, nothing special. There’s no kitchen table or chairs, which makes sense if it’s just him living here. Strolling into the living room, I chuckle when I notice the gaming system and forty-two-inch TV. He has the same taste in video games as Gwen. Loads of zombie shooters, and wait... is that a farming simulator? Huh, I wasn’t expecting that.
I look at the bookshelf against the wall and zone in on the only picture in the apartment. An iron fist wraps around my heart when I focus on it. The woman has long golden hair and piercing green eyes. Her smile is wide, and she has a light trail of freckles over the bridge of her nose. The man has light brown hair, close to dirty blond. He has a neatly trimmed beard and looks at the woman with a loving expression. The boy is a perfect combination of his parents. His blond hair is messy, and he has his mother’s eyes. He’s smiling wide, showing a few missing baby teeth. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to put two and two together. If I were to guess, Rome is about seven in this picture. His mom would leave a year later, dismantling his family structure.
“There you are.” His voice is deep and soothing, still husky from sleep, making him sound even sexier.
“You look just like her.” I nod at the photo on the shelf before me without looking at him.
Silence fills the space; the only noise is his muffled footsteps as he approaches me. His shoulder brushes against mine, and a heavy sigh leaves his chest.
“What was she like?” I ask, being as careful as I can.
“She was . . . good. Until she left.”
A hint of resentment fills his tone, and I don’t blame him for it.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that. No one deserves to have their mother or father leave them without an explanation. I’m sure it still hurts. Not knowing why she left and dealing with that trauma.”
He doesn’t respond, but I can feel the tension radiating from his body.
I move my attention to his face. His jaw is clenched, and his cheeks are splotchy.
“You know it’s not your fault, right?” I reach out and brush my hand against his. “You aren’t to blame.” I keep my tone low and tentative.
“I don’t think I agree,” he murmurs.
“And why is that?”
He furrows his brow, and his eyes don’t leave the framed photograph. “They loved one another. I mean, look at them.”
I glance back at the picture before returning my focus to him.
“If she loved him, and if he loved her, she wouldn’t have left. I’m the only factor I can think of. I wasn’t an easy child. I begged them to let me play football. I threw tantrums, screamed, and cried if I didn’t get what I wanted. They never fought, so there’s only one explanation. She left because of me.”
Keeping my emotions in check, I take a moment to curb my defensiveness. I graze his jawline with my knuckles before tilting his head so he’s looking at me.
“Listen to me,” I start, trying to keep my voice steady. “You are not the reason she left. I will not speak ill of her even though I really want to. Do you know what children do, Rome? They cry, they scream, and they drive their parents up the wall. You are not at fault. You don’t know what happened between your mom and dad. For all you know, they weren’t as in love as they seemed. Even if they were in love, even if they never argued, she made the conscious decision to leave you and your dad. She’s an adult, and she is the only one to blame. You may never find the answer you’re looking for, but you must start accepting that it’s not your fault.”
He tries to look away from me, but I guide his focus back. “And no, this isn’t me evaluating you. This is me protecting the man who deserves nothing but the best in the world.”
“No one has ever said that to me before, not even my dad,” he mumbles, tears coating his eyes.
“I will tell you every day until you believe me. I will remind you that you are worth everything the universe has to offer. And you are not the reason she left. You never were.”
“I don’t know if I can believe you.” Tears slip down his cheek, and I catch them with my thumb.
“You won’t right away. You can’t undo a lifetime of beliefs in a day. It’s going to take time, but I can promise you that with work, you will begin to believe me.” I offer him a kind smile before he rests his chin on my head.
“You know, I wasn’t prepared for this. When I saw you in my jersey with bare legs, I planned on taking you in my arms and throwing your fine ass back into bed.”
I snicker and start to soften when his lips tilt upward, showing me his flawless grin. “Sorry, handsome. I can’t help it. Helping people is in my DNA.” I stand on my tiptoes and kiss his cheek. “Want to go back to bed?”
With a sniffle, he nods and places a kiss on my forehead. “I would love that, but you owe me for both turning me on and making me cry.”
I wrap my arms around his bare waist and follow him back into the bedroom. “Yes, Captain,” I giggle.
We climb back into bed, and I rest my head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. He runs his fingers up and down my arm, and my eyes start to flutter closed as sleep overtakes my body.
“If I knew the trouble you would cause me, I would have better prepared myself. I’m going to trust you because I know you’ll change my life,” Rome says as he wraps his arms around me, securing me against his body.
Fatigue settles in my bones, and my mind starts to sway.
“And because I’m falling for you, Wildflower. Harder than I want to admit.”
That’s the last thing that registers in my mind before I succumb to exhaustion.
The bed shifts, and I begin to stir. I flop onto my stomach and shove my arms under the cool pillow with a long release of air. I’m about to fall back asleep when Rome squeezes his hand against my belly and inches it downward. He brushes my hair away from my neck and trails his lips along my skin.
“Wake up,” he hums in my ear, and chills run up my spine.
“No,” I whine and shake my head.
“You have a debt to settle,” he says before nibbling on my earlobe. “And you made the grave mistake of falling asleep in my jersey. I need to fuck you, princess.”
Pulling on my hips, he lifts my bare ass and presses his cock against me. I shiver when his finger glides through my folds to my clit, tracing small agonizing circles.
“Do you have any objections?” he growls in my ear.
“No,” I breathe.
“Did I leave the Chrissy Willows speechless? Huh, who knew it was that easy.”
I go to sass the shit out of him but end up gasping when he drives his cock inside me. “Fuck!” I ball the sheets in my fists.
“So fucking tight,” he grunts as he drives in and out of me.
My walls massage his erection, trying to accommodate the girth and impressive length. I’ve never been with anyone as big as him, and there’s no going back. Rome has ruined me in the best way possible.
My back arches, and I moan as he hits that sensitive spot. “Right there, please,” I plead while bouncing off him in time with his rhythm.
“Shh.”
I purse my lips in response and turn around, only for him to wrap my curls in his fist and hold my head still, forcing me to watch him fuck me.
“Whose pussy is this?”
I fight back the moans of pleasure that threaten to leave my lips. When I don’t respond, his movements quicken.
“Answer me, Willows.”
“I’m sorry.” I smirk at him. “I thought you wanted me to be quiet.”
He grips my hips and presses deeper into me. When he stills, I shudder as he hits my pleasure point. “Rome!”
He wraps his hand around my throat and pulls my back against his chest. “I’ll ask you again. Whose pussy is this?”
With a staggering breath, I whimper, “Yours.”
“That’s my girl.”
He guides me back in place, and his abs press into the small of my back as he folds his body over mine and kisses my shoulder.
I expect him to continue ravaging me, but he pulls out. I start to beg him to come back but stop when he flips me on my back and kisses me with every ounce of passion he can.
“You are gorgeous. I hope you know that.”
I look into his eyes and offer him a warm smile. “You make me believe that I am.”
He trails his lips down my neck and hums against my pulse. “Tell me if I get too rough.”
“I will,” I reassure him.
The tip of his length settles into my entrance, and I dig my fingernails into his back when he presses inside me once again.
Rome grunts, and his eyes darken to a sinister shade of green. He enjoys seeing me writhe under him, hearing me moan and whimper, screaming his name.
I’m normally someone who takes control, always have been. I’ve never been with someone who is so... dominant. I wasn’t prepared for this, but it’s a more than pleasant surprise. Rome can take the power he wants, but he’s a fool to think it will always be like this.
His shoulder blades flex under my palms as he rams his cock into me repeatedly. Rome moans, and it sends a coil of desire to my core, another explosion building within me.
“Rome,” I manage to say before releasing a muffled curse.
He looks at me, and I cup his cheeks and kiss him with all the desire I feel. Wrapping my arms around him, I shove my face in the crook of his neck and groan against his skin. Rome presses the side of his face against my temple and groans in my ear.
“Harder, I need you harder.” My words are desperate as I near the peak.
Unlike most guys, Rome obeys. He listens to my needs and obliges without a second thought.
He increases his pace, his pelvis meeting mine, his balls hitting my ass while my grasp around him tightens. He hooks his arm under my left leg, allowing him to hit the spot I need him to reach.
“Yes, yes, right there!” My jaw hangs open as the muscles in my thighs tighten, and my toes curl. I gasp before the tension releases, and I’m left with stars in my eyes.
“Fuck,” I squeal while I hold onto him, unwilling to let go.
“Can I come inside you again?” he manages to ask, and I nod.
Not a second later, Rome groans in finality, and his cock pulses inside me as he comes. Warmth fills my core, leaving me wetter than I was moments before. He doesn’t pull out right away. Instead, he rests his forehead against mine and gives me a sloppy smile.
“You’ve ruined me.” He laughs darkly. “I can never go back now. I’m officially addicted to fucking you bare and coming inside you.”
I weave my fingers in his short hair and gently kiss his swollen lips. “Good thing I don’t plan on going anywhere.”
With a small smirk, he pulls out and collapses on his back next to me. We look at one another at the same time, neither of us moving.
“We have a date today. Remember?” I start.
He raises his eyebrows in confusion.
“The cat café. You, me, and my notebook.” I bop his nose before hopping out of bed.
“Does this mean I’m sleeping with my therapist?” he quips.
Spinning around, I walk over to him and kiss him. “No, it means you’re dating your therapist.”