Chapter 42
Chapter Forty-Two
Chrissy
T he door bursts open and then slams shut, startling me out of my skin. Turning around, I catch Rome storming off into his bedroom. I ready myself for the next door to slam, but it doesn’t come.
I can’t approach him now, even if I wanted to. One of the first things we’re taught in psychology is to not confront someone while they’re hot. They’ll likely say something they don’t mean because they aren’t thinking rationally.
So, when I hear the shower turn on, I pray to the universe he cranked the temperature as cold as it can go so he can simmer down.
With slow and methodical steps, I walk into his bedroom. The first thing I see is his phone on his bed, and the lock screen is a picture of me. Tilting my head, I recognize where the picture was taken, and my heart melts.
I’m wearing his red hoodie, chewing on a straw from the frozen drink I got at the movie theater, and my face is scrunched at him. I don’t remember him taking the photo, but I’m glad he did. The next thing to pop up sets my once-melted heart ablaze.
Fucking Malik.
I can’t see the message because his phone is locked, but my blood boils at the sight of his name. I’m not sure how Rome deals with that guy almost every day. I would have set him on fire by now.
I’m still not sure what happened yesterday. Rome hasn’t told me about the conversation he had with his coach yet. I wonder if it has anything to do with what Raina told me. Malik was acting stranger than usual, but I can’t say for certain. Nothing is clicking, and it’s frustrating.
What makes matters worse is that Rome is still lying to me. He doesn’t know that I know he’s still helping Malik with the play reviews. He told me he was going to take a step back, but he didn’t. That boy is going to push himself off the brink, and there’s only so much I can do to help him, to cushion the fall.
I need to see this message... but it’s against my code to break into someone’s phone—unless your name is Gwen. I can’t cross this line, especially because I’m his acting therapist. There’s a reason you don’t mix business and pleasure, and the fact that I want to protect him so fiercely is one of them.
Give him a chance.
With a long release of air, I step into the bathroom and rest my back against the sink. I listen to the sound of the running water hitting his body and flooding down the drain, contemplating making the first move.
“Do you want to talk about it?” I start, being as careful as I can.
No answer.
“I’m here for you. You know that, right?”
Nothing.
“Was it Malik?”
“Just leave it alone, Chrissy.”
“What did he say? Please, I just want to help.”
“As my girlfriend or as my psychologist?”
A sting lances my chest, radiating and spreading through the rest of my body.
“As your girlfriend who cares about you, who loves you.”
Silence.
“Okay, we don’t have to talk right now. But it would help you feel better. I can go back to my dorm and give you some space?—”
“Coach told Malik he knows I’ve been reviewing and making the plays. He also knows I’ve been helping the rookies. Malik found out, and now he won’t toss me the ball, which means my future as a football player has ended before it even began.” Rome pulls back the shower curtain, and I meet his tired gaze.
“There has to be a way?—”
He cuts me off before I can continue. “There isn’t. It’s this or...”
“Or what?”
He looks at me, unmoving.
“Or what, Rome?”
“It’s out of the question. He’s a prick and an entitled one at that. He’s not going to get what he wants from me. End of story.”
“What does he want?” My voice turns pleading and desperate.
His gaze darkens, almost like he’s gauging whether or not I can handle the truth.
“Tell me,” I insist.
“You.”
My brow furrows.
“He wants you.”
“I’m not yours to give away. I’m not some sort of prize to win.”
“I know, and that’s why I said it’s out of the question.” He pushes the curtain closed, but I’m not done talking to him face-to-face.
Gripping the shower curtain, I pull it back just enough so I can see him. “He won’t throw you the ball unless he gets me? What does that even mean?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t press further because it’s not going to happen.” Rome’s tone is tight and stern. He’s not going to budge.
“What if he only wants me to be his mentor? I can swap with Raina?—”
“No, Chrissy,” Rome orders.
“I won’t have you jeopardize your future for me,” I respond with the same resolve. “Not now, not ever.”
“I said no. End of discussion. I won’t give him what he wants. You said so yourself, you’re not a prize to be won.”
We stare at one another, neither of us willing to submit, to admit we’re right or wrong. Rome and I are alike in many ways, and our stubbornness is at the top of the list.
“You can’t tell me what to do,” I retort.
“If you go to him, I will know, and I’ll never forgive you.”
“Even if it’s to secure your future?”
“You said you wouldn’t leave me. I fell in love with you because you swore you wouldn’t break my heart. If you do this, I’ll see it as nothing more than an act of betrayal, and I won’t forgive you.”
“You really don’t listen to me during our one-on-one sessions, do you?” I don’t wait for a response to continue. “You’re burned out. You take on way too much for that team, and you don’t get the credit for it. I’m willing to bet how the coach discovered you’ve been stepping in, and I’ll place good money on a bet saying that he wants to make you captain. But you won’t do it. Want to know why?” I pause, taking a deep breath before I continue. “You’re afraid.”
His expression twists, but I don’t stop.
“Malik Chen won’t toss you the ball if you steal his title and spotlight. He won’t toss you the ball if he doesn’t get the girl he wants. Either way, you don’t get the fucking ball. You’ve told me time and time again you want to be drafted into the Philadelphia Eagles because not only is it your dream, but it will allow you to be closer to home. And you’re willing to throw that all away just to prove something to Malik. Well, Rome Carter, I don’t fly that way. Call it whatever you want, but what I’m going to do is certainly not betrayal. For once, let me help you.”
Our eyes stay locked. Rome doesn’t waver, and neither do I.
“I can’t do that.” His tone is low and dark.
And I leave on that note.
“Professor Clastis?” I call as I knock on her office door.
“Ms. Willows, please come in.” She waves me forward.
I take a seat with a polite smile, even though the last thing I want to be doing is smiling right now.
“There’s something I have to discuss with you,” I begin.
Do I want to do this?
No.
Do I have a choice?
Yes.
I’m doing this for Rome.
“I made a mistake. I broke the first rule in the ‘what not to do with your patients’ handbook. You see, my mentee and I are good friends, but over these last few weeks our relationship... deepened. I can’t give him the care he needs because I can’t separate the lines between professionalism and my relationship with him. I broke a rule, and I’ll understand if you dismiss me from the program. I just can’t move forward with this on my conscience.”
It’s not a lie either. Deep down, I knew that moving forward in this program with Rome was a bad idea. Either way, I don’t want to lose him. But it feels like I have him as my patient or my boyfriend. It can’t be both. Doing this will clear the weight off my shoulders, and it will protect Rome’s future. Fuck Malik Chen, I’m my own woman. I can play hardball too.
“If you’ll still have me, I spoke with Raina Bennett, and she is willing to trade partners with me. We’ll catch each other up and include it in our next paper, and if you’re not happy with the results, I will step down. I just want to do what’s right.”
Again, not a lie. I don’t want to evaluate Malik, but I’ll do what’s right for Rome, even if it means putting my happiness on the line. I can handle Malik, even though Rome doesn’t think I can. I handled him in the store, and I managed him in the hall. I’ve proven that I can stand up for myself. I don’t need Rome, or any man, to do that for me.
Professor Clastis sighs, her lips tilting into a small grin. “Thank you for coming to me about this, Ms. Willows. I’m glad to hear that you know a line was crossed. And because of your upstanding and academically impressive record, I will grant you this one time pass. You may switch with Ms. Raina Bennett. But I do expect a full report by the end of next week. Is that understood?”
“Yes, ma’am. I’ll have it ready for you.”
“Then you best get to it.”
My chest feels lighter, and my heart isn’t pounding against my eardrums. Rome is going to despise me for this, he said so himself. But I can’t stand by and allow him to give up. Relationships are a team effort, and I’m only doing what I believe is best for him.
I take my phone out and read Raina’s message, then copy and paste a certain asshat’s number into my phone and text him.
You got what you wanted. Meet me tomorrow at the cat café. If I hear that you didn’t pass the ball to Rome, I will end this partnership before it even starts. Understood?
Yes, clear as day ;)