CHAPTER 13
M allory had ignored his calls and texts for a full twenty-four hours, and Beckett could not blame her. Not one bit. He was a coward of the highest order, and hated himself. The only saving grace was that he could hobble around without the blasted crutches and drive himself again. It was a small victory, but he’d take it.
Beckett’s job as a virtual accountant was perfect for times like these—days when all he wanted to do was bury himself in work and hide away from the rest of the world. The sun hung low outside the kitchen window, and Beckett felt his stomach growl. Unlike his time with Mallory, he knew he couldn’t survive on takeout alone. Not to mention, there was no way in hell he’d be able to stomach Frizz and Freeze until they were back on solid ground. Just the thought of it made his body revolt.
Tidying up his work, Beckett attempted to make the kitchen a kitchen again. When Gramps was on the decline, he kept his office upstairs in his room. He wanted to be close by in case the older man needed anything. Now he was downstairs hiding away from all possible memories of the past, and it suited him fine.
Well, maybe not his back. In his haste to avoid his grandparent’s room, he slept on the couch last night. At least when Mallory was there it was fun and cozy—and very sexy. But a guy nearing thirty couldn’t pretend his back was invincible. Much like his heart, he needed to give it extra care. What a depressing reality.
The sound of gravel crunching alerted him to a visitor. Unable to play it cool, Beckett sprinted toward the front door, only to trip over one of his sneakers and tumble against the wall. Unfortunately, it was his busted hand that broke his fall, and a bolt of pain shot right up his arm. A few choice profanities later, and he was back on his feet. It was Mallory, it had to be. There was no way she wouldn’t come back and check on him, right? Didn’t nurses have to follow the Hippocratic oath?
“Foxy!” Evan’s voice boomed from beyond the door, and Beckett grimaced. He loved his buddy, like a brother, but right now, he wasn’t in the mood for sunshine vibes. He was in the mood for sulking and beating himself up. Although if Evan knew why I was hiding out, he’d probably take care of the beating-up part...
Beckett ran his hands through his red hair, attempting to make it look less disheveled. His glasses had a smear of ketchup on the left lens, but he wasn’t worrying about that now. Throwing the door open, he was greeted to the aroma of chili cheese fries and cholesterol.
“Hey, man.” Evan shoved past with a literal armload of food. “I swung by your place and saw it was still dark, so I thought I’d take a field trip.”
Evan strode into the kitchen and made himself at home, pulling out plates and glasses while he set up their spread. Despite wanting anything but more fried food—and painful memories—Beckett took his seat at the table and moved a stack of files to the side. “Thanks, I was just about to search for dinner.”
“I gotta ask, man,” Evan said, pouring a variety of sodas and shakes into glasses. “Why not stay out here? Granted I love having you closer in Buckeye Falls, but if this is your home, you should stay.”
Beckett reached out for one of the cups of pop, touched that Evan bought one of all their favorite soda combinations. Eventually their metabolism will catch up to them, but that was hopefully a decade away. “I don’t know,” he replied, uneasy at opening yet another wound. He himself couldn’t fully explain the need to leave this house, despite the fact it was truly the only home he ever had.
No matter what happened with his parents, no matter how his grandparents passed, he’d always felt like he could come back here and feel safe, feel protected from the world. Now, with everyone gone, it felt like he was trying to wear someone else’s skin.
Before he could continue his lame explanation, Evan grabbed his forearm and tugged him closer. “What the hell is this?” He wiggled Beckett’s limb and frowned. “Are you hurt?”
Beckett muttered under his breath, “I guess we’re doing this now.” He sighed and shook his head. Turning to Evan, he said, “Yeah. I sort of shot a nail through my hand on Saturday.”
Evan snorted, dropping his friend’s hand and looking incredulous. “I’m sorry, what?”
Regaling Evan with the story didn’t take long, especially since he didn’t mention Mallory once. The impetus for his seclusion was based on the fact he couldn’t mention her to Evan without turning as red as a tomato and stumbling over his words. He’d spent time with Mallory, kissed her, and held her like she belonged to him—like he’d always wanted. How was he supposed to come back to reality after stepping through heaven?
“Did you go to Buckeye Falls General?”
There it was, the out Beckett needed. He could lie to his best friend, and tell him that he’d stayed local and avoided his sister like the plague. Yet as strong as the urge to lie was, Beckett wanted to be honest. Evan was family, and he was tired of tiptoeing around the truth like it was landmines.
“No, actually. I went to Columbus.”
Evan frowned. “You should have called. I could have driven you.” He took a handful of fries and dipped them in ranch before shoving them in his mouth. “Did you see Mal while you were there?”
Beckett’s neck grew hot as he flushed crimson. The infernal blush rose until he was practically as red as his double cherry cola. Damn his Irish heritage...
“Yeah, she was my nurse.” He cleared his throat and coughed, a dribble of soda sliding down his chin.
“No way, what a coincidence.”
Sure, a coincidence that Beckett orchestrated by asking for Nurse Lawson every five minutes until she finally arrived. He’d feared at one point that security would throw him out for being a creep, but he didn’t care. As soon as he’d fallen off that ladder and shot himself with the nail gun, he’d wanted Mallory—and not just because of her nursing degree.
Changing topics, Evan asked, “Have you seen Mal recently? I know she picked up some extra shifts this week, but she’s been radio silent for days. Even when she’s slammed at work, I’ll get a handful of memes about animals or some crap. Something’s up.”
Beckett took a huge bite of his BBQ mushroom burger, enjoying the savory tang of the sauce as he chewed. If they kept eating, he could avoid more thoughtful conversations, right? “I’m sure it’s just work.”
Evan wiped his hands on a wad of napkins and tossed them onto the table. “I don’t know. This reminds me of a couple of years ago.”
Beckett’s throat tightened, and he nearly choked on his burger. “Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah. I didn’t want to bother you with it back then, since Gram had just passed, but she was really down for a while. Like hiding in her apartment and eating cookie dough from the tub depressed.”
What little food Beckett had managed to eat turned to cement in his gut. He’d done that to Mallory. He’d been the one to break her heart. “It was that bad?” he asked, already knowing the answer.
Evan’s head was down, studying the cooling stack of onion rings between them. “She doesn’t get that like, Foxy. Mal’s always the one to make us laugh and keep us on our toes. She never gave me details, but I think some asshole broke her heart. I mean, why else would she shut people out?”
“Does Mal date a lot?” Beckett knew the answer, or at least thought he did. Mallory wasn’t exactly living the life of a nun, but she always was selective when it came to dating. She wouldn’t spend her time with just any Tom, Dick, or Harry.
“I guess? We’ve always been close, so I think I know when she’s dating. There was that one loser last year. They lasted about five minutes. It was the married guy.” The vein in Evan’s temple pulsed at the memory.
“I still can’t get over that,” Beckett shoved his chair back, unable to sit and listen to this story another minute. He strode into the pantry for Gramp’s secret stash and returned with the vodka bottle and a pronounced limp. He’d likely march himself back to the hospital with a compound fracture at this point. Without asking, he splashed a shot into each of their pop glasses before falling back into his chair, his shoulders sagging with guilt.
Evan raised an eyebrow at his friend’s reaction. “Calm down, man. I took care of it. You think I’d let any asshole get away with treating Mal poorly?”
“I guess not,” Beckett said, unable to hide the fact he was pouting like a toddler. “What did you do?”
Evan smirked, the curve of his lips devilish. Evan wasn’t a guy who gave brotherly enforcer vibes, mostly because he usually smiled like he’d just celebrated Christmas. But this look was a little scary, and Beckett squirmed in his seat. “I invited him to the diner and pretended I didn’t know what he did. We chatted for a while and then I offered to walk him out.”
“Yeah?” Beckett asked, his fingers digging into his palms.
“Then I sucker punched him in the stomach. He fell down like a sack of potatoes. I probably would have done more, but Max came out and stopped me.” He shook his head, clearly upset he didn’t get to finish his—clearly justifiable—ass kicking.
“Jesus, Lawless. That’s awesome.”
Evan shrugged. “That clown deserved more, but Max was right. It wasn’t worth me getting arrested for attempted murder.”
Beckett waited for Evan to chuckle, to give a sign he wasn’t serious, but the edge in his jaw and the tension radiating off him proved he was still mad as hell. “I’m getting those vibes now, man. I feel helpless. Here I am, engaged to the best woman in the freaking world, and Mal’s moping about some jackass. What the hell can I do?”
Clearing his throat, Beckett asked, “And you asked her what’s going on?”
Evan snagged a balled-up napkin and tossed it at Beckett’s head. “No Foxy, I’m taking mindreading lessons at the community college. Hopefully I can just read her mind and get to the bottom of this. Yes, I’ve asked her. She said she’s fine, and we all know women aren’t fine when they say they are.” Evan drained his glass and grimaced when the vodka hit. “I guess that’s the benefit of growing up with three older sisters. I’ve become very good at reading moods, or at least knowing when to hide from them.”
Beckett’s neck thrummed. A tension headache threatened to knock him to his knees. There was a pink elephant in the room, sitting between them and their melting milkshakes. The truth burned the tip of his tongue, begging to be unleashed. Hey Lawless, funny story. Turns out I’ve been breaking your sister’s heart for the last fifteen years. But don’t kill me, because I’m going to be your best man.
Shaking his head, Evan pulled himself to standing and collected empty plates. “Let’s change the subject. I didn’t come over here to be angry and depressed. I came to help with the house and talk about my fiancée .” He put extra emphasis on the last word, his signature grin sliding back into place.
“I don’t need much help with the house tonight,” Beckett said, putting the leftovers in the fridge. “But I’m sure there’s wedding stuff I should be doing? Have you guys set a date yet?”
Evan wiped down the table and gestured toward the living room. “Let’s sit by the window. I love watching the sunset from the front of the house.”
Beckett said a silent prayer of thanks that he’d had the forethought to put away the pillow fort he and Mallory built. Granted he’d slept in that fort like a lovesick loser, but self-preservation won out in the nick of time. The Lawsons were well known for their pillow forts, and Evan would recognize his sister’s handiwork. At least I have a set of crutches ready for when Evan breaks my legs...
Evan flopped down on the far side and draped his arm over the back of the couch. Beckett took the other end and propped his busted foot onto the coffee table. “So, what’s the plan?”
“We’re thinking a short engagement.”
Beckett didn’t know the first thing about engagement periods, but short sounded good to him. The idea of years of wedding planning made him antsy. “Sounds reasonable.”
“Yeah, I mean, we’re still young, but we’re thinking about the future. We want to get a house and have kids, and it seems foolish to wait.”
The weight of his statement settled around the friends, and Beckett felt his eyes sting. There had never been a doubt that Evan would be an excellent family man, but that always seemed so far ahead in the future. Yet now, he was spitting distance to living the American Dream. “Wow, Lawless. I’m really excited for you guys.”
Evan reached out and flicked Beckett’s elbow, causing him to yelp. “Thanks, Foxy. But let’s not get all emotional about it. I already cried on the way over here, so I should be good until tomorrow.” He winked before settling back on his side of the sofa. “What I will need help with is an engagement party.”
“I love a good party.” Beckett waggled his eyebrows.
“We’re thinking lowkey, honestly probably at the diner. We just want our immediate family and close friends there. Nothing too fancy, just really good food and the people we love.”
“Sounds perfect to me,” Beckett said, meaning every word. Being a man, he’d never obsessed about the perfect wedding day. The more he thought about that fact, the more he realized it was because he’d already had the perfect wedding day. It was intimate and sweet, just the woman he loved and his best friend.
“Dude, are you okay? You’re as white as a sheet.”
Beckett waved off his friend’s concern. “Absolutely. I think it was too many onion rings. I hate to say it, but I might be getting too old for that much fried food in one sitting.” He rubbed his belly to illustrate his point, and fortunately, Evan bought it.
“Well, I won’t take up your whole night. I’ll text the dates we’re thinking, and I thought you and Mal could help me with the planning.”
“Of course.” Beckett tried not to get too excited over the prospect of seeing Mallory again, especially since it meant she couldn’t avoid him for all eternity.
Evan pulled himself to his feet, pausing for a moment to watch the sunset outside. The sky had turned orange and pink, like someone had left rainbow sherbet out to melt. The colorful light cut through the rows of apple trees, still bearing fruit despite being ignored for the season.
“God, it’s gorgeous here.”
“No argument here.”
“You should get married here,” Evan said, his smile infectious. “We’re going to find you a nice girl and you’ll live here and then our kids can be friends.”
“Probably need to find a date to your engagement party first, Lawless. Maybe there’s someone in Buckeye Falls.” Beckett hoped his voice wasn’t shaking. It was as if Evan had jumped inside his brain and found the truth. Maybe he had taken mindreading classes?
“Pfft, yeah right. The only ones I can think of are married or Mallory. And we all know that’d be a terrible idea.”
Beckett froze, unable to hold back his follow-up question. “And why is that a terrible idea?”
Evan was incredulous. “Um, are you serious?”
Unable to stop himself, Beckett puffed out his chest. “I mean, now I am. You don’t think I’m good enough for your sister?”
“I’m not saying that, but I think it’s a horrible idea. I can’t have my best friend and sister fooling around. When you guys break up, I’d have to pick sides, and that sounds terrible.” He chuckled, clearly not picking up on Beckett’s inner turmoil. “I’ll find you someone for the wedding. Don’t worry about it. You won’t have to resort to taking Mallory. I know you guys used to be each other’s backups, but we can do better.”
“If you say so,” Beckett mumbled, following his friend out into the cooling evening air. “Say hi to CeCe for me. Tell her if she wants to change her mind, I’m still available.”
Evan threw back his head and laughed before flipping him the bird and getting behind the wheel. The sound of his favorite K-Pop station blasted from the open window as he drove back to the woman he loved.
Beckett could barely get himself back inside before he collapsed onto the couch and covered his face. There had been his chance to tell Evan the truth, and he’d blown it. Worse still, Evan made it perfectly clear how he felt about Beckett and Mallory together. In fact, it was crystal clear. Perhaps this was the universe telling him to give it up. Pack up the farm house and figure out his next move. He’d be damned if he lost his friendship with Evan.
Judging from what Evan said, he already blew it with Mallory. Beckett hadn’t felt this low in months, and he yearned for just five more minutes with Gramps. The old man’s advice would go a long way now, especially since his directive was too simple. Beckett couldn’t just get the girl, he needed to get a time machine.