Chapter 13 Mari
Mari
The feeling of the king’s hands against my neck, the closeness of his face, the way his fingers had flexed into the curve of my waist, the heat rolling off his body like a wave that slammed into mine.
Demanding.
“Asshole.” I hissed as I tossed and turned, the bed sheets suddenly heavy and tangling around my legs, and I kicked them off as if that would help my current state of insomnia.
All the removal of the blankets did was leave my skin bare to the cool air, prickling and oversensitive in ways that I did not want to think about.
Flat on my back, I kept my eyes closed, counting my breaths. I needed to sleep, I had to sleep. The morning was not that far off, and I had another full day of interviewing Doves and taking on their trauma ahead of me.
For that…that fucking Demon. I sucked in a sharp breath as a zing of something I did not want to name curled closer to my center, begging for something more than straight up denial.
I was starting to think that Tulli was right, that I needed to get laid, because I had not had a reaction like this to a male in…years. If I was being brutally honest, I wasn’t sure I’d ever had this kind of reaction.
Without even realizing it my hand drifted between my legs, my mind going back to the king, to his body so very close, the feel of his chest under my hands, his eyes dilating as he drank me in, and his very obvious desire as he’d turned away from me.
But if I thought of him, while I took my own pleasure, what did that mean? That I wanted him? I snatched my hand away and sat up straight, hating that he’d done this to me, make me doubt myself. “Probably that fucking magic trick.”
I swung my legs out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom, flicked on the cold-water spray and stepped into it, the icy underground river water coursing over my head down to my toes.
I stood under the flow, letting it calm me until my teeth chattered with cold. Wrapping myself in a thin towel, I dried myself off, wide awake.
There would be no sleep for me, so I might as well do something productive. I grimaced at the thought of being moved into the castle. But for the moment there was nothing I could do.
I would find this girl he sought, and I would hand her over knowing that she would stop terrible things from happening to the whole world, and then I would use that distraction to get me, Feather, Tulli, and Jastani free of this place once and for all.
Slipping on a simple, thin dressing gown, I packed a few things, tucking my set of rings deep into the bag and burying it under a number of silken underthings.
I would need to find a way to make sure that I had a room next to Tulli and Feather in the castle or this ruse I’d spent years holding together, would be gone in a flash.
A scuffle outside my window froze me.
My dagger was on the side table and slid across carefully, without a sound. If Demon thought he would sneak up on me a second time, I would abuse him of that notion.
A thrill shot through me as I edged up to the window and peered around the edge. Catching him off guard was a small reward for the trouble he was causing me.
But it was not the king, but two figures below my window.
The one I recognized. I stepped back, grabbed my Briar Queen cloak and dress and slid it over the dressing gown. Only then did I step out onto the balcony fully. “Harald, what are you doing here?”
The two men looked up, and I saw the face of one of the younger guards. Harald lifted his hand. “I came to escort you and the ladies to the castle.”
“I was sent to guard them,” the other said, his words reaching me even as quietly as he spoke.
“And then the king sent me too. He just wants to make sure they are all safe. What with…” Harald shook his head and waved his hands in air as if that would somehow encompass the killings.
“That’s fine, boys. The other Doves are not awake yet, give us some time, yes?” I waved a hand at them and the guard melted back into the shadows. Harald stayed, and gave me a salute, which I returned.
He looked over his shoulder and surprising me, made a quick climb up the side of the building, using the lattice from the rose garden until he was right at the balcony.
“Harald, what is it?”
“I’m worried, Briar Queen,” he swallowed hard, knuckles white where he clung to the top of the railing. “I’m just real worried for you, and Feather and Tulli, you know? I look out for you three most of all.”
I put my hand over his, knowing his loyalty ran deeper than most. “I know, Harald. But the king has sent extra guards, and—”
Harald shrunk as if I’d hit him, a trickle of tears running down one cheek. “I don’t want that killer to get you…”
“Oh, Harald.” I crouched so we were eye to eye, as much as I could be with the cloak on. He’d been like this on the boat when we’d been children, but I thought he’d grown out of the panic attacks. “He won’t.”
“You don’t know that, and then what? What if he decides that one of you is next? I couldn’t…how could I go on?” He scrunched his eyes shut, tears leaking from both.
A soft shuffle of bare feet and the smell of Tulli’s perfume reached me before she crouched down beside me.
“Harry,” Tulli’s voice snapped his eyes open. She smiled gently. “Harry, you have always been the one to look out for us. We know that, and we look out for you too. Being moved into the King’s castle means we’ll be closer to you too. Right?”
A shudder of what could only be relief slid through him. “You’re right Tulli, you’re always right.”
She leaned forward and kissed him gently on the cheek, “Go on, Harry, we’ll be out in a bit.”
Harald did as she asked, sliding down from the balcony, dropping to the ground and making his way around the corner to what I hoped was just the front of the house to wait for us.
“You were always best with him.” I stood from the crouch with a heavy sigh.
“He’s got a good heart, but the fear tangles him up,” Tulli said. “I get that, I really do. There are days I wish I could just break down and cry, but we don’t get that luxury, do we?”
I took her hand. “No, we don’t.”
“Like the ocean,” I said.
Tulli tucked my hand into the crook of her arm. “Like the motherfucking ocean, calm when we need to be, and raging when the time comes.”
I laughed. That wasn’t quite the saying, but it was close enough.
Right now I needed to find the calm instead of the upheaval that Demon had caused. He’d taken my true name, and bound me to him in a way that I didn’t understand. If nothing else, I needed to be close enough to him that I could find out just what he’d done, and how long it would last.
Hopefully it would fade before we had to make our last attempt at leaving. A hope that was feeling further and further away.
A few short hours later, my Doves and I were ensconced in the eastern side of the Seventhell castle that historically had never housed a Dove.
Malach had been the ruler for so long that the Doves had never been a part of this place.
Previous rulers might have had human women as pets, and playthings, but not Malach.
Our rooms were lined up down the long hallway, our names already written into them. “No,” I said as our guide stopped to offer Tulli a room across from Feather. “They stay together. With a conjoining door to mine.”
My other Doves, Jastani, Perry, Vinta, Holly, Anka, Snow, Faiza, and Berel squealed as they stepped through individual doors. The House of Rose and Lanterns was large, but they all shared rooms-there was no other way to fit us otherwise. To have their own rooms was a dream.
“Of course, this way to the end of the hall.” The servant was human, male, eunuch as they all were, and looked to be in his late seventies. I wondered how long he’d been here. Since he was a child, like us?
The thought of being stuck here that long…
fear crawled up my throat and tried to strangle me.
I spared a glance over my shoulder at Jastani and winced.
Already, I could see her body starting to change.
The flat belly becoming a gentle swell. It wouldn’t be long before her pregnancy became obvious to all.
We didn’t have a lifetime to get this job done and run.
We had weeks…maybe less.
The Demon King was anxious to find this woman, so in that, we were of the same mind.
One thing we could agree on.
Even the thought made me want to spit.
“Here, the king specifically said this was to be your room, Briar Queen. There is a door on the balconies leading across to the bedroom next door, will that do?” His voice was husky as he bowed to me, as if I were truly a queen. I put a hand on his shoulder.
“I am not royalty, friend, please do not bow to me.”
His eyes twinkled as he stood back up before leaning in to whisper, “Rather to you than one of them, Briar Queen.”
I didn’t even get his name before he backed away, leaving me in front of the door. Tulli and Feather stepped through into their room, squealing.
“Pink and green! I love it!” Tulli yelped.
I put my hand to the long iron lever and pushed down, stepping through into…
I stopped in the doorway like the room itself had pressed a hand to my chest and said, wait. Or perhaps it was the knowledge that Demon had requested this room specifically for me.
This couldn’t be mine.
Gold didn’t just decorate this place, it reigned over it. Climbing the walls, crowning the ceiling, curling itself into impossible shapes like it had grown there instead of being crafted.
Had he done it with his connection to metal?
The chandelier alone looked like it belonged in a palace not a bedroom given to a…to a whore.
I put my hand to my chest, steadying myself, because I was not sure what else to do.
Light spilled from the chandelier in soft honeyed layers, catching every edge, every carved flourish, turning the whole room into something halfway between a dream and a dare.
And the bed—gods, the bed.