6. Chapter Six
Chapter Six
Rafe
There are worse things in the world than getting locked out of your cottage in Ireland for the third time in one day—like having the woman you invited arrive and completely ignore you when you wave at her.
But she’s here, which has to mean something.
I can’t fathom she would get time off from work, fly all the way across the ocean, and stay in the cottage I got her if she only intended to ignore me for a free vacation.
That’s not Luna. She’s here because she accepted my offer, and I try to keep that at the front of my mind while I wait patiently for the right time to reach out to Luna and try to strike up some conversation.
I scratch the now properly groomed beard covering my chin and sigh before turning back to the cottage.
I hadn’t anticipated the other two homes on the property, but so far, I haven’t been bothered by anyone renting them.
I can only hope it stays that way while I work my rear end off to get Luna back.
I still can’t get used to the view, and I find myself staring out over the coastline for the fifth time since I arrived.
Fortunately, I’ve got the key and I won’t lock myself out again by accident, so I can try to relax and unwind a little before heading over to confront—no, not confront.
That seems too harsh. To…whatever it is when you want to throw yourself at a woman’s feet and beg her to take you back.
With a sigh, I settle into one of the lounge chairs in the rear yard.
I can’t help thinking this sunrise is perfect for a romantic walk along the coast, but we’re not there yet.
I’m not sure we will get there, but I remind myself once more that Luna is here.
She didn’t call or come to the cottage to greet me, but she’s here.
It does mean something--a positive something.
Unless it’s goodbye. Would she fly all the way here for a romantic goodbye? I doubt that. That wouldn’t be like her either.
Cold, salty air fills my lungs. I should go inside, but inside the cottage is too closed off.
Out here, I’m closer to God…closer to a simple life…
closer to nature…just closer. I glance at the little house up the hill once more.
The lights are off now, and on this cloudy morning, only a faint glow from one window indicates Luna has a fire roaring.
That, and the copious smoke billowing from the chimney.
I love this little place. It’s peaceful, quaint, and unimposing.
Three things my family has not been since Luna and I broke up.
They try to fill my days with activities, get me out of the house, when all I want to do is grieve what I lost a little longer.
On one hand, I get it. They love me and worry about me, but pushing me into a phase in my life where they think I should be doesn’t help me get there.
In fact, all it does is make me want to stick to my guns, stay in this stalled position for as long as possible.
But here? Here makes me want to take a step back and reevaluate everything I thought was wrong.
Here makes me want to move forward, finally, into something resembling a functioning adult human being.
I sigh and lean forward, clasping my hands the same way I do every morning and every night. I pray for serenity, for peace, acceptance, and some sign that this will work out. Or a sign that it’s okay to move on if it doesn’t. My prayers are punctuated by the dinging of my phone.
“This thing,” I growl, annoyed that I forgot to silence it before setting up on the patio to watch the shoreline.
I check to ensure it isn’t anything important—like my bank account has dwindled down to nothing or my parents have yet another party to plan—and notice that it is an email from an old friend, one I haven’t spoken to in some time.
I’m curious, so I tap on the screen and open the email.
Pleasantries abound to us all—lovely, it’s a group email—and it goes on to inform us that Hayden Laughton and Alexandra McFallon are engaged.
I blink a few times and let that sink in.
A massive sinkhole opening up and inhaling my entire hometown in a blink is easier to wrap my mind around than these two getting married.
There it is, though, in black and white—okay, it’s in frilly pink and green—but it’s there.
Solid evidence that even opposing personalities that grate on one another’s nerves until one might leap from a cliff for some relief can somehow come together in love.
“Hayden and Alex. Go figure,” I whisper and tap on the photo of them.
They look good, happy, and for a second, I think about reaching out to them.
We had such great times in high school, but color me surprised that these two got together.
I was positive she hated Hayden’s guts, but I did always wonder if he had a thing for her behind all of his teasing and taunting.
Nevertheless, I’m happy for them. It stings a little, but it isn’t a bad sting.
It means I lost something—namely my own perfect ending—and miss it, but it doesn’t take away from the joy I have for my friends.
I decide I’ll reach out tomorrow despite all the years and miles between us—well, miles right now.
I still live close to them in Coldstone Creek, but we’re so far out of touch I’m surprised they even thought to send the announcement to me.
I cram my phone in my pocket and head inside where it’s significantly warmer.
I don’t know where the day has gone, but it’s already brunch.
Eating should probably be a priority, but I can’t stop thinking about my friends and all of the double dates Luna and I went on with them—when they were dating different people, of course.
I chuckle and wonder what Luna will think about Hayden and Alex getting married.
Maybe she already knows? There’s a chance she’s kept in contact with them, but I’m not sure.
It hits me how little I actually know about my former girlfriend’s life.
I mean, I knew about her dreams and the things she wanted for our future.
I knew about her work and what I thought mattered but…
I have no idea who her friends are now. I don’t know who she kept in contact with, who she hangs out with now that she’s not with me, who fills her days with conversation and acquaintanceship.
Scrubbing my hand over my scruff again, I try to think.
Who did she hang out with when she wasn’t with me?
Viv and Lore, yes, but other than that, I can’t say.
A knot tightens in my chest. I miss those days, those friends, and all the great memories Luna and I made.
Reconnecting with the guys from those days might be what I need to jump-start real life again, but that also means facing questions about how Luna and I are—assuming they don’t already know.
And once again, I’m back to the beginning.
Luna. Nothing moves forward without her.
I can’t go back, and going forward means convincing her that I won’t go back, but she needs to hear that first. Believe it…
which is what this trip is for. I’ve circled all the way back to where I was when I first looked up at that cottage this morning.
Rehashing old wounds and spreading my already fragile heart even thinner is a horrible idea.
Reaching out to old friends who might have stayed in contact with Luna could be bad right now, and I need as many brownie points as possible if I’m going to win her back.
Angry Alexandra would hate me more than mustard if she discovered I hurt Luna, and the woman had incredibly strong feelings about condiments.
Then again…they were my friends too. I should reach out.
Without overthinking it again, I scroll through my phone and find Hayden’s old number. There’s a good chance it’s not the same, but it’s worth a try. I tap it and try to be patient while it rings.
“Hello?” Hayden’s voice hits me hard. Man, I’ve missed him. I stop the flood of memories so I can focus on this moment, this conversation with an old friend.
“Hey, it’s Rafe. I uh…was calling to congratulate you.”
“Rafe Thomas, I never thought I’d hear your voice again. How are you?”
“I’m making it. How are you? I got the email just a little while ago.” I say a silent prayer he doesn’t ask me about Luna and how she’s doing. I’m not ready for that conversation yet.
“Ah, you got the announcement. Alex tried to talk me out of sending them to save money, but you know my mother. She wanted everyone to know. Email was the best way to appease them both, even if it is a little rude.”
I chuckle. Hayden was always worried about offending people. Except Alex, of course. “No, I’m glad I got it. It’s like a blast from the past, but a good one. How is Alex?”
Hayden chuckles and whispers. “Still a handful, but I love her. So much has happened just this year, but yeah, obviously we got over our mutual disgust with one another. Are you still in North Carolina?”
“Yeah, I am. Well, right now I’m on vacation, but I still live in Coldstone.” I swallow hard and wait for the inevitable question that comes next. I should have thought this out more. Had a better reason for my breakup than my own idiocy driving Luna away.
“Yes, the old hometown. I don’t know if you know this, but my family moved back to Virginia to be close to my grandparents. I decided to go with them, spend some time with family, and oddly I ran into Alex on the beach one day.”
“Is that when things changed?” I ask, steering the conversation farther from Luna.
“Absolutely not. We said hello and in fifteen seconds I managed to make her angry. Long story short, she was on a girls’ weekend with her sister and cousins and had ‘zero time for self absorbed idiots,’ as she put it.”