Chapter 28 #2
Huh? Rubbing my tired eyes, I blink quickly to find many concerned faces staring at me. “Summer?” Bay helps me sit up as Zander hands me my laptop, and I see Sarah on the screen.
“I’m here. Sorry. I’m back.” Damn it, I passed out after the news. Pretty impressive considering I was sitting down.
“Excellent. There are a lot of concerned people around you, but perhaps we can talk in private?”
“Oh, yeah. Can you give me a few minutes, and I’ll call you back from the bedroom?”
“Of course. Talk soon,” Sarah says before hanging up.
I meet Zander’s eyes. “Thanks for calling her. I’m sorry, everyone." I get up and hug Hurry as tight as I can. "I'm so, so sorry Hurry. Do you want to join me in the bedroom?”
“Sure, Sunshine,” he nods. He looks as though he might crumble, his shoulders slumped like a stark echo of my own feelings.
I grab his hand and my laptop and walk to my bedroom. Getting comfy against the headboard with Seb beside me, I give him a side hug. “Sorry, I zoned out. How can I help you?”
“Shit. I don’t know, Sunshine. This is so messed up.”
“Let’s talk to Sarah and see if that helps.” I open my laptop and video call her.
“Hello Summer. Hello Seb,” she smiles kindly. “You both have had a very difficult day so far. Zander filled me in. Summer, how are you feeling about Lily’s father?”
“I think I went into shock for a bit.”
“Understandable, given the news. You are no longer tied to Ben.”
“True, and that’s a relief. Maybe I won’t get any more letters from him now.”
“That’s possible. Another positive is that Lily has gained an amazing big brother.”
“Nick would’ve spoiled her,” Seb says with a little smile.
“Lily would’ve had him wrapped around her finger in no time,” I add. Tears start flowing again when I think about Nick and Lily bee together. She would’ve started rolling her eyes like he does. What am I going to do without him? My life is a book with more missing pages.
“From what I understand, someone will handle Patrick at some point, so he will not be a part of your life for long, Summer. He has nothing to do with Lily or Vanessa, and there is no reason he ever will. Remember that. It’s a very brave thing Nick did this morning,” Sarah replies.
“I’m mad at him,” I tell Sarah.
“That makes sense, Summer. How else are you feeling towards Nick?”
“Mad, sad, terrified, heartbroken, in love, proud. Did I mention terrified?”
“Me too,” Seb adds.
“He’s definitely in a difficult situation, but he possesses highly trained skills, from what Zander has said. He also has experience on his side. Believe in him. He has so many reasons to fight to come back home.”
“What if something happens to him?”
“Don’t play the ‘what if’ game, Summer. You have no reason to doubt that Nick can handle himself. Believe in him. He has the FBI helping. He put his father away when he was younger, and he has more experience now.”
“I guess, but his father has more experience, too.”
“That’s true, but remember, Nick has you and his family to fight for. Patrick is fighting only for himself. That makes a difference.”
Nodding that I heard her, I look at Seb. “What do you think, Hurry?”
“I think I need another vacation,” he says, rubbing his hand down his face.
“Seb, how is Beth?” Sarah asks.
“Doing okay, I think. Her treatment is progressing.”
“If I may make a suggestion?”
“Yeah, go ahead,” Seb replies.
“A new location may be best for her right now. I can make a few calls and get her transferred to a different rehabilitation center. That would decrease the chances of anyone giving her drugs again, and it would be more difficult to fall into old patterns if there is nothing familiar.”
“That’s actually a good idea. Is there somewhere close by?”
“Yes, there should be. If you give me Troy’s phone number, I can make arrangements.”
Seb rattles off his number to Sarah as I watch a slight weight lifting off his shoulders already. Sarah is very kind.
“Lean on each other and your family and friends. Difficult times can forge stronger bonds. The best thing you can do is live your life to its fullest, one moment at a time.”
“Thanks, Sarah.”
“Of course. Would either of you like to discuss further?”
I check in with Seb, but he shakes his head, so we hang up for now, with an invitation to call back anytime. “Did that help?” I ask Seb.
“Some yeah. Beth didn’t deserve that, you know? She was clean for a long time before Patrick interfered. What if she can’t get clean again?”
“If she did it once, then there’s no reason she can’t again Hurry.
Hopefully, with some distance, she can take control of her life.
” I really hope she can, for his sake. It’s been tearing Seb apart to see his mom failing.
Now we need to add worrying about Nick on top of everything else.
Taking a deep breath, I squeeze his hand. “Let’s go back to the couch.”
Seb stands and pulls me up into a hug. “I wanted to ask what you thought of E not volunteering to leave with us?”
“Oh. I understand the hesitation. It was a life-altering decision, Hurry.”
“Yeah, but it’s us. Would he have really let us leave, not knowing when we would see each other again? He was my forever.”
“He’s not anymore?”
“I don’t know, Sunshine,” he shakes his head. “I don’t know anything anymore.”
“Do you want me to haul him back here so we can talk?” He nods, so I go out and find E, asking him to join us in my room.
I take a seat on the bed as the two of them stare at each other.
Since no one is speaking, I start. “E, you hurt Seb when you hesitated about moving with us for witness protection.”
“It was a life-changing move. Something I needed to think about,” E says, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Would you have come with us? If we had to leave?” Seb asks him.
“Why does it matter? You guys don’t have to leave now,” E replies. Oh damn. That was the wrong thing to say. He’s deflecting.
Seb drops onto the bed beside me and grabs my hand. “I guess I have my answer.”
“That’s not fair, Seb. There’s school to consider, and I’m trying to work things out with my grandparents.”
“Your inheritance again? That’s more important than us?” Seb asks. I look up and see his shoulders slumped, and tears welling in his eyes—the picture of devastation. “It’s not love if money is more important, E.”
“I do love you. I love you both. I probably would've chased you both down if you left. I keep screwing everything up. I’m sorry,” E says, defeated, before walking out.
Wrapping my arms around Seb, I lean my head on his shoulder and get him to talk some more about E.
I’m less hurt than he is because my relationship with E wasn’t as long.
I know he cares, but he’s also overwhelmed with his life right now.
I wouldn’t blame him if he stayed. Seb, however, does, and I understand his feelings.
If Jake had hesitated to come with me, I’d have been destroyed.
But Seb’s situation is different; he chose to leave, expecting E to follow.
Bay comes in to check on us, knocking on the doorframe. “Is everything okay? E seems pretty upset.”
“Not really.” I shrug and pat the bed beside me. Bay takes a seat, grabbing my other hand. “I spoke to my dad, and I was going to come with you guys.”
“That’s amazing. Thank you, Bay,” I smile.
“No thanks needed. You guys are family. Although I suspect our family isn’t doing so well right now.”
“Understatement,” Seb replies. “E wasn’t going to come.”
“I’m surprised,” Bay says. “Although he’s struggling with his family right now. I’m glad I wasn’t born into money,” he jokes.
I bump my shoulder into his. “Me too. At least not around here. Their lifestyle makes no sense to me.”
“Me three,” Seb mumbles.
“Suggestions on how we get our two friends to get their heads out of their asses?” Bay asks.
“No idea,” Seb shrugs.
“I have an idea for Alex that I’m keeping up my sleeve, but I’m not sure about E.”
“Since both of you have already tried, I’ll talk to him,” Bay offers. I squeeze his hand in thanks. “Come out when you guys are ready. Z's in the office with Troy, and the rest are watching a movie.”
Seb and I sit together for a while longer on the edge of my bed, just thinking. How did we end up here with everyone’s life so messy? We’re splintering apart.
A few hours later, Troy and Zander join us in the living room again.
We’re all still dazed, not talking much.
I’ve cried on and off, as has Gabby. “Okay, guys,” Troy begins.
“I know this is really hard for everyone. It’s hard for us too.
First thing is, we’re still on high alert.
Travel in pairs. Gabs, no going anywhere alone.
Summer, you’ll have Ceres with you for a while yet.
Please be vigilant. Second, we have a leak in the FBI, obviously, since Patrick knew we were talking about WITSEC.
I’m pretty confident it’s not Eddy, so we had a chat with him while he stepped out of the office this afternoon.
He’s looking into things on his end, but has agreed not to speak with anyone in his office about us.
Off the record, there’s an investigation happening that involves the FBI here and in Tennessee. He couldn’t tell us details.”
“What about Nick working with the Tennessee branch?” Alex asks.
“The FBI can’t discuss ongoing investigations, but Eddie has a friend in the Tennessee branch, and he made sure he was aware of Nick’s situation.”
I rest my head in my hands. I’m so worried about him.
He has to be okay. This no-contact situation is so hard.
It reminds me of when I woke up from the medically induced coma and had no one to talk to.
Without Mom, Lily bee, and Jake to turn to, profound loneliness and unbearable pressure bore down on me.
“I’ve contacted the school and the principal to let them know Nick is away for a while. They don’t know the details. Ceres has also been updated,” Troy adds.
“So we just pretend everything’s all right?” Gabby asks with a wobbly lip.
Troy kneels down in front of her while Seb pulls her to his side. “No Gabs. Everything isn’t okay, but Nick would want us to keep going and live our lives, wouldn’t he?”
“Yeah, but he just left. I’m not ready yet.”
“That’s okay. I know it’s going to be strange, but hopefully he won’t be gone long,” Troy tells her before kissing her hair.
“What would everyone like to do for the rest of the day?” Zander asks.
Alex, E, and Bay are heading home for dinner. The rest of us are going to eat here.
After dinner, Seb, Gabby, and I sit under the live oak in the backyard. We’re all scared for Nick, so we end up talking about him until dark. Troy insists Seb and Gabby go home with him, so I walk them out to the Jeep with hugs goodbye.
When I get back inside, I find Zander on the couch watching sports, so I take a seat in the couch corner. “Holding up okay, darling?” He asks.
“Not really. I’m terrified for him, and I miss him so much already,” I cry. He slides over to wrap me in his arms.
“You two have gotten close. It’s not forever, darling. Remember that. I have faith he’ll be okay. You must believe that.” He slides closer to give me a hug.
“I hope you’re right because I can’t lose anyone else.” Zander holds me until I settle, then gets up and grabs us some ice cream. I sit with him until Seb calls, then excuse myself to my bedroom. “Hi Hurry.”
“Sunshine, how are ya?”
“The same. You?”
“I’m pretending Nick’s just out somewhere and not gone, so it’s not so weird to have this room to myself.”
“I don’t blame you. What are we going to do?”
“There’s nothing we can do. Pray he’s alright. Are you gonna go to school tomorrow?”
“I dunno. Haven’t thought about it yet.”
“Troy wants me and Gabs to go. Bay and Alex are going, too.”
“I’ll go too, then. What about E?”
“I haven’t talked to him. Why is everything such a mess, Sunshine? I feel like you and Bay are all that’s left of our friend group.”
“I don’t know, Hurry. Maybe I should enact my plan for Alex, see if that helps?”
“What’s your idea?”
“I’m gonna call his dad directly and tell him what’s happening. I really think his dad doesn’t know about most of what’s going on, and he’d help Alex if he knew.”
“Good idea. I think you should.”
We talk for a while longer before I hang up to get ready for bed and take a sleeping pill.
I try to review for the test I missed today, but it’s no use.
Hugging Jake’s pillow isn’t enough tonight either.
Poking my head out into the hallway, I see the lights are off, so Zander must be in bed.
I tiptoe into the guest room and crawl into Nick’s bed.
His scent envelops me like a cocoon, and I breathe deeply.
Tears fall again as I hug his pillow, eventually falling asleep.