Chapter 46
I wind myself up into a frenzy thinking of things they could be doing differently, until I finally resort to putting one of my sleep apps on and drift off for what must be less than an hour.
When I wake up, I drag myself to the bathroom mirror and groan.
I haven’t had circles under my eyes like this since last Halloween.
My big meeting takes place mid-morning, when I enter the virtual meeting room and discover that Niles is already there.
Which means there’s just the two of us. Schoolgirl error.
Never, ever be early on Zoom with your new boss unless you want to face the sort of excruciating small talk usually reserved for standing in lifts after someone has farted.
‘Hello!’ I grin, sounding like a children’s entertainer about to pull a bunny out of a hat.
He looks up and peers in.
‘Julia,’ he says smoothly. I decide now isn’t the time to correct him. ‘How is it in sunny Manchester?’
‘Not that sunny,’ I chuckle, lamely.
But he’s now typing, apparently taking the opportunity to respond to a couple of emails. A silence thunders through my ears. He hits a final decisive key, then sits back, as I resort to the conversational techniques that work for my hairdresser.
‘Did you do anything nice at the weekend?’
But he seems too busy to have registered the question and offers no immediate response, leaving my mind to shuffle through all manner of possibilities about what he got up to. Pottering about a garden? Having his bottom spanked by a high-class call girl? Feasibly, it might have been both.
‘I did. Thank you,’ he says, so long after the question I’d almost forgotten I’d asked it.
I try to work out whether the fact that Niles himself is in this meeting has any meaning.
But just as I’ve convinced myself it might be a positive sign, I remember that they’ve only scheduled ten minutes, four of which have been taken up waiting for Jacinta.
Even accounting for the shortfall, this is probably the precise amount of time you’d need to sack someone.
She finally appears, her expression so impassive as to be entirely unreadable.
‘As you know, Julia, we’ve had to make some tough decisions lately,’ Niles says. ‘But it isn’t all bad news. The Fable that’s become patently obvious. But with that, comes an opportunity for expansion.’
Of the twenty-eight Fable & Punk stores, he tells me, seventeen will be sold off.
The rest will make way for a major growth plan for The Neutral Company.
The remaining eleven units will be refitted and rebranded, with staff retained where possible.
Niles seems confident this will have shareholders and investors alike wetting their pants.
At this point, Jacinta steps in to talk about a multichannel approach and relocation strategies and throughout her whole speech the only words going through my head are I am completely fucked.
But then she says something that takes me so by surprise I am initially convinced I must have misheard.
‘We want you to be a part of this, Jules.’
I blink. ‘Me?’
‘We are a company that values talent and experience. Plus, I like your style. I don’t believe in surrounding myself with yes men.
Or . . . women. People. Yes people,’ he settles on.
‘The point is, this is an exciting period of transition which offers some excellent opportunities – for the right personalities.’
My heart begins to rev. ‘Are you . . . saying I get to keep my job?’
‘No – that will go. But we’re offering you a promotion,’ Jacinta steps in. ‘There’s a group role we need to fill as a result of my own increased responsibilities. You’d be working closely alongside me initially, with a view to you becoming deputy.’
My jaw drops. I feel a rush of relief that is close to spiritual. Until this point I hadn’t appreciated just how badly I’d never wanted to retrain as an undertaker.
‘Obviously, we need to move quickly so we’d ask that you give us an answer within a week. Is that okay?’
‘Y— I . . . of course,’ I stutter.
‘HR will send through the details later today, but I’m confident the salary will more than meet your expectations and there will of course be a generous relocation package.’
‘A . . . sorry, what?’
‘The Manchester base is being wound down,’ she says. ‘Your job would be here in head office. In London.’