Chapter 3
CHAPTER 3
I showered as soon as I got home, worried that Brennan's scent would cling to me as much as the smoke from the campfire.
When I had dressed in my t-shirt and sleep pants and opened the bathroom door, still wringing my hair out in a towel, Curtis stood waiting.
I jumped back, shocked to see him standing there.
"You made it home all right," he said. "They kept you late at work."
His tone said he knew I was lying.
"It was a long day. I need to get some sleep," I said.
His gaze dropped to my chest, and I crossed my arms awkwardly.
Then his nostrils flared, as if he were breathing in my scent. I stiffened, pressing my back against the wall as I tried to edge around him to my room.
Curtis let me go, but the way he watched me still made me feel sick.
* * *
The next day, Alison looked miserable with her hangover, more miserable than she usually was when waiting on a Sunday. The Sunday lunch patrons were different from our regulars. They tipped like shit and left the tables a mess.
But she still brightened when she saw me. "Do you regret not getting Brennan's number last night?"
"No. Why? How often does he come to those things, anyway?"
"He's a regular," she said. "He comes to the diner sometimes too."
"Does he?"
"Are you sure you don't regret not getting his number?"
“Alison…”
Her answering smile was wide and mischievous.
"What did you do?"
"I've got his number," she sing-songed. "And I know he wants to take you out."
"I'm not dating anyone."
"That's why I told him he should come for lunch today."
She was lucky I couldn't shift yet, because I might have murdered her right there on the Formica counter.
"Why?"
"Because you deserve to have some fun and be happy, Amelia! All you do is work and look after your ungrateful little brat-siblings."
"Hey." I frowned at her.
"Your words."
"Yes, and my siblings," I said. “It’s different when I call them brats.”
She raised her hands. "Just... take your lunch break and eat some french fries with Brennan when he comes. I'll get your tables."
“You’re meddling,” I scolded her. Then I softened, realizing that I was going to disappear from her life soon and she might think it was because she'd done something wrong. "But thanks. Now let's survive the lunch rush, then I’ll think about Brennan."
Brennan didn't come until three, when everything had quieted down. I could feel him when he walked in, and I knew it was him before I looked up from the Coke machine and saw him. His shoulders looked broad in his leather jacket, and he smiled at Alison and said something to her. She practically buckled at the knees; my best friend swooned for him like everyone else, apparently.
He took a seat in a booth, and when I came over, he looked up at me. For the first time, Brennan looked uncertain.
"I hope you don't mind," he said. "I wanted to see you again, but if this makes you uncomfortable, I'll go."
"Why?"
“Because I don't intend to force my presence on you. But I thought you might not want to see me again because of pack bullshit, not because you genuinely thought I was ugly or boring.” He grinned at me in a way that suggested he was keenly aware he was neither.
"I meant why did you want to see me again?"
"Isn't that obvious?" He gestured at the seat across from him.
"No."
"You're beautiful, kind and clever."
"You have no idea if I'm clever or kind. You barely know me." And having people claim I was beautiful had only led me into trouble so far.
"I'm an excellent judge of character." He tilted his head to one side. "Are you?"
There was an open challenge in those deep blue eyes.
"You're welcome to join me for lunch," he added.
"I work here. I shouldn't date a customer."
His nostrils flared subtly. "You won’t work here for much longer, will you?"
So he knew I was about to shift. He knew I'd be dangerous when I did, to anyone outside our pack.
"It's the wrong time for me to date." I slid into the booth across from him. Then I felt suddenly awkward. "Not that you..."
"I am looking for a date," he said. "I like you. I thought I'd made that clear."
I didn't know how to respond. But Alison dropped off two sodas and a basket of piping hot french fries, saving me from having to reply. Brennan seemed startlingly honest and direct.
It made me wonder what he was hiding, because every shifter has secrets.
We ate french fries and talked. I told him about my family and my job, and he seemed genuinely interested in the diner and the food and the people who came in and out. After a while, I noticed his gaze kept flickering to the door.
"What are you waiting for?" I asked.
"I'm just worried someone will come in who knows me," he said. "Or who knows you."
The thought sent a chill rushing down my skin, accompanied with a memory of Curtis watching me the night before.
"What is it?" he asked, frowning, almost as if he'd picked up on my feelings. He seemed unusually perceptive, even for a wolf. "Something's bothering you."
"I wouldn't call you a something," I said quickly and lightly, but he kept looking at me with that same intensity.
"If you want me to go, I'll go. But I have a feeling you're in some kind of trouble, and if you need someone to talk to..."
I felt so alone all the time, and it was strange to have this shifter ask me about my problems as if someone cared.
"I shouldn't talk to you," I said, but it was just me trying to talk myself out of it.
"Probably not," he said, with one of those easy smiles. His face lit up in a way that made him look even more handsome.
"So there you have it. I won't talk to you, and you won't talk to me."
“But I want to talk to you.” His bark of laughter sounded rough and real. "I'd like to tell you more than I probably should.”
It was hard for me to tell if he was flirting, or if he was just making himself clear.
"I was going to take you for a ride on my motorcycle today," Brennan said. "But I think you need to know me better before you'll trust me on a motorcycle ride. Given we are not from the same pack."
"All those girls at the party last night would love to go with you on a motorcycle ride."
He stared back at me as if he heard the tinge of jealousy in my voice, and it didn't matter to him at all. As if the girls didn't matter to him at all, either. "So?"
"What pack are you from?"
"The Steele pack."
My breath left my lungs with a gush. The Steele wolves were our enemies. I glanced around. The room was filled with humans laughing and talking, but that didn't matter. He could kill me in a heartbeat. He could kill everyone in this room in under a minute if he shifted.
“Amelia.” His voice was calm and certain and soothing. “You're safe with me. This is neutral territory.”
“But it’d be really easy for us to leave neutral territory,” I reminded him, thinking of the strips of land or the cities that formed neutral territory between packs.
"You'd still be safe with me," he promised.
There was something wrong with the way I reacted to him. I lost my mind, as if he were my...
My mind shied away from the word. As if he were my mate.
"Okay," I breathed. "After I get off work tonight. Before someone sees us."
He smiled. "I'll be waiting behind the diner when you're done."
He popped one last French fry in his mouth and rose. I could feel everyone watching him as he left the diner.
As hard as I tried to focus, I worked distractedly, smiling at customers but forgetting their drink orders. Alison came over to me to ask me if I was okay.
"Your cheeks are flushed," she said, giving me a knowing smile. "You're either sick or you're in love."
“I'm not in love. I met him twice. That would be ridiculous.”
She spread her arms in a shrug. “Love is ridiculous!”
I didn't have time to be in love, even if I wanted to be. I should focus on work and on getting out of Curtis’s house, the way I had until last night.
But now I couldn’t stop thinking about Brennan, no matter how I tried. There was an electricity to him, a power that I could feel from across the room. I knew what kind of man he was, and he didn't seem the type to settle down with anyone, let alone a quiet and serious girl who spent all her free time working. I’d built up a stash of cash hidden in my room. Once my shifting was stable and I knew I wouldn't kill anyone, I’d move out.
There were free pack territories where I could start a life without having to answer to any pack. I wasn't sure I had the guts to leave, because I wasn't sure my pack would let me still see Aiden and Rose.
Falling in love would be an unnecessary complication.
And yet, there I was after my shift, joining Brennan as he waited leaning against his sleek black motorcycle. His hands were shoved in his pockets, the wind tousled his hair, and he looked incredibly sexy.
I had the feeling he knew that, but it was hard to be annoyed by his arrogance when he looked up at me and smiled, his eyes brightening when he saw me.
"Ready?" He straightened from the bike, his full height drawing him over a foot taller than me.
I might have felt intimidated, except I didn't see any lust in his eyes, just open friendliness. He waited, not touching me, not kissing me, not even looking like he wanted to. It was strange to be with a male who wasn't looking at me like I was something to be devoured.
"I'm ready."
He handed me a helmet and watched to make sure I put it on properly. Then he straddled the bike, and I slid onto the back. It felt awkward to wrap my thighs around his waist, but he patted my leg with one hand—absently, just making sure I was all right.
He started the bike, revving it loudly. I buried my face in his back, hoping I wouldn't show how afraid I was of riding on the back of a motorcycle.
We didn't speak as he drove. There was a part of me that was terrified, but there was also something pleasant about being on the back of his bike, the wind in my face, the heat of his body, the sense of safety I felt with my arms around his lean waist.
He took us further away from my pack's territory, onto the open highway. Free territory. No one owned this space, because even the packs needed to use the highways. At first, I just wanted him to keep going; I wanted to drive together to the ends of the earth. I could stay in this moment.
My body tensed as we kept going, no longer enjoying the trip so much as I worried he was taking me toward his pack's territory. What if he was kidnapping me?
He slowed the bike, pulling into a parking lot, and the motorcycle came to a smooth stop. I slid off and looked at him in confusion. "What is it?"
"You tensed up," he said. "You're worried."
"I'm not," I said.
His lips quirked. But it was a different smile than before, one that seemed a bit sad and a bit condescending, as if he knew all about me. "You don't have to pretend. I want you to know you're safe with me, Amelia."
He climbed off the bike. "You get on in the front. I'll teach you how to ride."
I looked at the bike doubtfully. "I'd hate to kill us on our first date."
He grinned. "So you admit it's a date!"
"I don't know what I'm doing with you. But I have to admit it's a date."
“You don’t have to.” He patted the handlebars. “But if you want to… I’ll teach you.”
I slung my leg over it, feeling intimidated at the thought of being the one to drive.
Brennan got back on the bike, and it felt crowded and awkward. Especially because of how my body reacted to him. I wondered if he could smell my desire. Shifters had enhanced senses from the time we were children—but they grew even more intense once we began shifting. I didn’t know what that would be like yet.
He kept his feet flat on the ground, squishing himself backwards in order to give me space. "The first thing you have to do is put the bike in first gear. Do you know how to ride a regular bike?"
"I know how to ride a bike," I said, a little irritated.
“Just in case you didn't.” He walked me through the motions of how to start and drive the bike.
I tried to start it up again, but the engine sputtered and died. Brennan was so close to me, and his clove and pine scent was just as addictive as last night. I bit my lower lip and tried to focus.
“Try again, if you want,” he said. He seemed like he was trying to give me all the power, and it felt strange, but nice.
I put the bike in first gear, but I missed it and put it in second. The engine roared loudly. I instantly tried to take it back out of second gear, but my fingers slipped and cranked the gears into third. The bike lurched forward.
"Take it out of third. You’ve got this, Amelia.” He was so patient that it calmed my nerves.
The bike lurched forward, and it felt like I was losing my balance, but Brennan’s arm was strong around my waist and his voice always stayed cool and collected.
I cranked the gear into neutral, trying to keep the bike from falling over. We both dismounted. Brennan let me lean against him while I caught my breath.
He was a solid, reassuring presence. It made me wonder what it would be like to lean against him in bed.
He put his hands on my waist. "It was a great first try.”
“It scared the hell out of me,” I said, looking up into his handsome face. Trying to drive the bike wasn’t the only thing that scared the hell out of me.
"It's scaring the hell out of me, too," he said, smiling. "But that's your job. You make the decisions, you learn, and I’ll be here to keep you safe."
His hands fell from my waist, and he straddled the bike again. "Starting is the hard part. Stop once you're actually going."
I nodded, and he got off the bike again. I slung my leg over the bike, squishing up to make room for him.
"That's good," he said.
He was still standing by the side of the road. He didn't get on the bike with me. I felt like he was pushing me to do this on my own.
I put the bike in first gear, and then I pushed down on the kickstand.
"Give it some gas. You have to get up to speed on a motorcycle.”
He had to have ridden the bike a million times before, and it seemed like it was probably his prized possession, so I was amazed by how relaxed he was now.
I revved the engine.
"That's it," he said. "Now give it more gas."
The bike lurched forward. I let out the clutch, and the bike took off down the road. I only went about forty feet before I stopped and turned back. He was jogging down the road toward me, his face lit with a triumphant smile. He seemed genuinely so happy for me.
And before I knew it, we were flying down the road together. His grip on my waist was light, even though I would've had a death grip riding behind an unexperienced driver. He exuded so much confidence not just in himself, but in me. I relaxed, having fun easing around the curves of the road, watching the pines whip by.
Then suddenly, the bike skidded out from underneath me. My heart leapt in my chest as I let go of the handlebars and braced myself for impact, but Brennan was already a step ahead. He had both hands on the handlebars and expertly maneuvered the bike back under control. We’d narrowly avoided disaster, but he acted like it was nothing.
Once we were in a safe spot, he stopped the bike. He helped me off, and I yanked off my helmet. My heart was hammering in my throat, and I expected him to yell at me.
His face was gentle, like he knew how scared I had been. "You did great. It's not always easy to keep control."
He wrapped me in a hug that I didn't realize I needed until I melted against his body. Adrenaline was still coursing through my body, and his presence only strengthened it.
Finally, I found my voice again. "Thank you. That could have been terrible."
With my cheek pressed against his sweatshirt, I could how his heart pounded in his chest as if it were keeping time with mine.
"You did great."
I let out a shaky, disbelieving laugh. “I almost killed us both.”
"Well, you didn't kill us. You’re learning." His eyes twinkled down at me, warm and open. Everything in me longed to get even closer, even though I was already wrapped up in his arms.
I kissed him.
It was an uncertain, tentative brush of my lips against his. His calm, friendly presence had made me wonder if he even wanted to kiss me or if I’d misread him, but I wanted him so badly.
He responded instantly, his arm tightening around my waist. But his lips barely brushed mine back.
When I pulled away, he looked at me uncertainly.
I asked, “Did you… is it okay that I kissed you?”
“It’s better than okay. I could kiss you all day.”
“Then why didn’t you kiss me first?”
He shook his head. “I don’t think that’s what you need from me, Blue Eyes.”
“Blue eyes?” I crinkled up my nose.
“What? It’s a bad nickname?”
“It’s a little generic, isn’t it? What if I just called you broad shoulders?”
His smile widened. “You think my shoulders are broad?”
“You know you look—” I cut myself off, but I couldn’t resist smiling back. “You’re impossible.”
We left the bike parked and went for a walk, rambling through the forest near the road as we chatted. The sun was sinking behind the pines, and when I shivered, he stripped off his sweatshirt and handed it to me. It was freshly washed, smelling like Tide and his own scent, instead of campfire smoke. But the little holes in the sleeve were still there.
I told him about my younger siblings, and he told me he had an army of siblings: three brothers and a bossy sister that he found slightly terrifying. Imagining Brennan intimidated by anyone seemed ridiculous.
A prickle ran down my spine. I could’ve sworn I felt someone watching us. When I turned to study the forest behind us, Brennan asked, “Are you all right?”
“Maybe,” I said. “Maybe it’s just my imagination.”
Brennan looked at me closely. He didn’t press, but his face was so open, as if I could tell him anything.
And so, for the first time, I told someone about Nathan. His jaw tightened when I described the odd encounter in the woods, but he stayed as calm as ever.
“Nathan Longroad. He’s the alpha’s son?” He spoke as if he knew the name.
I nodded. “But there are stories his father disowned him.”
“Even so. If you ever need to leave, you can call me, and I’ll pick you up.”
“You can’t come onto pack territory,” I said. “You’d start a war.”
His answering look said he knew that perfectly well. For a second, he looked stern and intimidating. Then we turned to head back to the bike, and he offered me his hand. “So, are we going out for another ride tomorrow?”
“Another date already?” I teased him. I slid my hand into his. His skin was deeply tanned from the sun, and white scars threaded over his knuckles. Before he could rescind the offer, I said, “I guess I don’t mind.”
He laughed, and the moment in the woods seemed like nothing but a distant, uneasy dream as I climbed onto the back of his bike.
* * *
The next few weeks passed in a blur as Brennan and I sneaked out for many more dates.
“Hey, blue eyes,” he greeted me.
“That’s a terrible nickname.” But I leaned up and kissed him anyway, and it was a deeper, more searing kiss than ever before.
He broke the kiss first and looked at me with a mixture of surprise and desire. "Are you really sure you're ready for this?"
"No," I said. "I'm not sure of anything."
"I want to be clear… I can't promise you much. I can't promise you a house or a family or even that you'll ever meet my pack. But I will promise you this." His gaze searched mine. "I will promise you a fun ride."
"A little bit arrogant. I didn't ask you for anything.” My voice came out too soft despite the hardness of the words. "We just met."
"I know." His hand cupped my cheek. "But I imagine you want those things too... because I have the craziest feeling. I want to give them to you."
Because we were mates.
I knew it; I could feel it thrumming through my blood when I looked at him.
But we were on the wrong sides of a war.
For now, here in the shade of neutral territory, I just kissed him again.