Chapter 29
Sadie
Except for the few minutes Boone left me to make a sandwich, we’ve done nothing but fuck. For what feels like days.
The world outside has blurred into something I can’t name—just the rhythm of his body inside mine, the endless spiral of need, the scent of sweat and sex clinging to the sheets.
But through it all, he hasn’t knotted me.
Every time I arch under him, every time I feel that edge coming closer, he holds back. He pulls away, grits his teeth, refuses that final surrender.
And I know why. I know he’s angry. I know I’ve broken something in him. But I’m selfish. I can’t stop myself.
Right now, I’m straddling his hips, riding him slow and deep. His head is tipped back, eyes closed, sweat running down the ridges of his chest. My thighs burn, my body strung tight, but I don’t stop.
“Boone,” I whisper, leaning forward, letting my lips brush his throat.
“Mmh,” he grunts, his big hands gripping my hips.
“Look at me.”
He shakes his head once, jaw tight, refusing.
“Please.” I press kisses along his neck, tasting salt and heat, begging in a way I shouldn’t have to.
Finally, his eyes open. The storm inside them nearly breaks me.
“You’re close,” he rasps.
I nod, my breath catching, my body trembling as another wave crests. I want to tell him how good this feels, how it’s the best I’ve ever had, but the words that spill out are the ones clawing deepest inside me.
“I’m sorry I hurt you.”
His eyes go glassy, the sheen of tears he’ll never let fall. His voice cracks. “Why can’t I be enough?”
“You are.” My hands cradle his face as I lean down, pressing my lips to his, trying to pour everything I can’t say into that kiss.
His hips jerk upward, driving into me harder. His chest heaves against mine.
“It doesn’t feel like it,” he mutters against my mouth, raw and broken.
“You are enough.” I repeat it, fierce this time, tasting the desperation in both of us.
The kiss turns messy, teeth and tongues colliding, my hair sticking to my damp cheeks as he suddenly flips us. My back hits the mattress, the breath punched out of me, and then he’s above me, braced on his forearms, eyes wild.
This isn’t control anymore. This is Boone losing it.
He lowers his head, biting down at my chest, my neck, marking me in ways I’ll never be able to hide. Each thrust drives me deeper into the mattress, the bed creaking, my nails raking down his back until I feel the skin break under my fingers.
“Boone—” My voice is a wrecked cry. “I’m so close.”
“I love you,” he blurts, voice guttural, right as his hips slam forward and he spills into me, hot and thick.
The words sear me. They burn through my bones even as my body tips over the edge. My climax rips out of me, shattering, tearing me apart as I scream his name and convulse around his cock.
For a heartbeat, everything is perfect.
And then I feel him pulling back.
“No.” My hands clutch at his shoulders, my voice breaking. “Please.”
He freezes above me, resignation etched across his face. He swallows hard, jaw flexing, and then he gives in. He sinks deeper, hips locking against mine, and his knot swells, stretching me wide. Wider than I thought possible.
I gasp, the breath punched out of me as the pressure builds, almost too much, almost unbearable—until it isn’t. Until it’s everything. Until I’m full in a way that makes me dizzy, breathless.
He collapses onto me, chest slick against mine, his weight pressing me into the bed. My arms wrap around him automatically, holding him like I’ll never let go.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbles against my shoulder, voice muffled.
“For what?” My fingers trace the ridges of his back, sliding over the raw indents my nails left behind.
He lifts his head, eyes red, expression torn apart. “For what I said. Yesterday. Today. All of it. I’m just… sorry.”
The words sting. They feel like a taking-back. Like he’s retreating even now, even with his knot locked inside me, even after whispering I love you with his release still hot in my body.
“Do you mean it?” My voice is small, betraying me.
His gaze doesn’t waver. “Yes.”
I bite down a sob and kiss him instead, clutching at him, clenching around his knot like I can anchor him to me with just my body. “Then we need to talk. About everything. Because I like you, Boone. I might even love you. But we can’t keep running in circles like this.”
He nods, forehead pressed to mine, breath uneven. “I know.”
Our lips meet again, slower this time, softer, like we’re relearning each other in the wreckage. His hand slides into my hair, holding me close, and for a moment I believe we can make it through.
Until he pulls back, eyes shadowed. “Sadie… I think you need to go to the police. Get a restraining order against Scott.”
The words slice me open. The bubble bursts.
“That’s the last thing I want to talk about right now,” I whisper, shaking my head. The thought of Scott intruding into this moment, into this fragile, broken, beautiful thing Boone and I are trying to build—it makes me want to scream.
“Sadie—”
“No.” My voice is sharp, final. I kiss him again, swallowing the rest of his words, clinging to the only truth I can hold onto. Him. Here. Us.
Because the world can wait.
But my heat, my heart, my hunger for him—none of that can.
Boone is still inside me, his weight draped heavy over my body, his knot locked so deep I can feel every twitch of him. My chest rises and falls under his, sweat drying tacky between us, and I can hear his heart hammering in sync with mine.
Neither of us speaks. I don’t know if he’s avoiding it, or if he’s just too raw to start. But the silence feels like it’s pressing down on us, demanding to be broken.
“Do you know what it’s like for an Omega?” I whisper finally.
His head shifts on the pillow, eyes dark, watching me. “Tell me.”
I lick my lips, gathering the courage. “It’s not just sex.
It’s need. It’s biology turned into fire.
My body doesn’t ask permission—it takes, it burns, it devours.
Heat is like being trapped in a storm you can’t control, and every nerve in me screams for relief.
You think this is about them—Shepard, Gabe.
But it’s not. It’s about me. My body. My choices.
Boone, I asked them because I needed help. Not because you weren’t enough.”
He flinches at the word.
“Not because I wanted to hurt you,” I add quickly, my fingers sliding through his damp hair.
“You’re the first man I’ve been comfortable with in years.
The first man I’ve trusted with my body, my safety, my heart.
You’re my best friend. But I like them, too.
I can’t pretend I don’t. They make me feel safe in different ways.
And I don’t want to lie to you about that. ”
His throat works, eyes flickering away.
I press on, even though my chest aches. “But if it’s too much, if it’s too hard for you, then you are enough. Just you. This, us—it’s enough for me. I’ll never ask for more if it destroys you.”
His jaw clenches. His arms tighten around me. Then his hips shift, just slightly, his knot rocking inside me. I gasp, my nails biting into his shoulders.
“Don’t say it like that,” he mutters, voice wrecked. “Like you’d cut yourself off just to make me feel better.”
“Because I would,” I breathe. “If it meant keeping you.”
His eyes squeeze shut, and then he lets out a laugh—low, broken. “Christ, Sadie. You don’t know what you do to me.”
I stroke his jaw. “Then tell me. Please.”
He swallows hard. His gaze locks onto mine, and for once, he doesn’t hide.
“My brother Sawyer… he was everything I wasn’t.
Stronger, faster, braver. He was the one people looked to, the one who made it out of the firehouse alive when I didn’t.
He beat me at everything. Every damn thing.
Girls, sports, work—you name it. And then I lost him.
Just like that. Gone. And now… now I feel like I’m losing again.
To Gabe. To Shepard. To men who are supposed to be my brothers.
And it’s killing me, Sadie. It’s ripping me open in places I thought had scarred shut. ”
My chest tightens so hard it hurts.
I cup his face, forcing him to see me. “This isn’t you losing me.
This isn’t them taking me away. This is me.
My choice. My body. Boone, you don’t lose when I open myself to more people I trust—you win, because you were the first one I let back in.
You’re the one who made me feel safe enough to even think about letting anyone else near me again. ”
He blinks rapidly, eyes glassy, like my words are cutting through something thick inside him.
“You’re not competing with anyone for me,” I whisper. “Not anymore.”
He shakes his head. “You make it sound simple, but it’s not. It’s messy. It’s fucking complicated.”
“I know,” I breathe, my chest pressed tight to his. “And I’m not even sure how this is going to look. But Boone—I think I’m falling in love with you.”
His breath stutters. He stares at me like I’ve just stripped him bare.
“Yeah?” His voice is barely audible, broken.
“Yes.” I nod, tears burning my eyes. “How could you ever doubt that?”
His knot throbs inside me as his hips roll, slow and steady. The movement wrings a gasp from me, my back arching, pleasure and emotion tangling until I don’t know which is which.
“Jesus Christ,” he mutters, pressing his forehead to mine. “I feel like such an ass. For how I treated them. For how I treated you. For everything.”
“You’re not an ass,” I say softly, brushing my lips against his. “You’re human. You’re hurting. And we can fix it. But not by ignoring it. We need to talk to them. Really talk. All of us.”
He nods, slow, resigned. “You’re right.”
“Then we will.”
“I’ll never control you,” he says suddenly, fiercely.
His voice vibrates against my skin. “Not ever. Not in this. Not in anything. You have to know that. But—” He swallows.
“Can you be patient with me? With the sharing? Because I want to be that man for you, Sadie. I want to give you everything. I just… I’ve never had to share. And I need time.”
Tears slide hot down my cheeks as I kiss him, clenching around his knot like my body is echoing my words. “Of course. I can be patient. I’ll wait as long as it takes.”
His hand cups my jaw, his mouth crushing mine in a kiss that’s tender and fierce all at once.
I hope I’m not just deluding myself, but I believe we might actually make it.