Sneak Peek
my stupid heart
Ryker and Molly
CHAPTER ONE
He could recite it verbatim, he’d read it so many times.
But that didn’t stop the chills from sweeping down his spine as Ryker McKnight stared at Molly’s text message for the five hundredth time.
Hey Ryker. I’m really sorry to do this right now. I know you’re all at the wedding. I wish we could be there. But you’ve always said that I could call or message whenever. Well, I need help. I’ve gone to the police and filed a restraining order, but it’s not working. I’m scared for Sasha and for me. I briefly tried dating her soccer coach. It was great at first, but after a couple of months, he became really possessive and would demand to read my text messages and emails. He found an email from Rob and Skyler thanking us for the twins’ birthday presents and he lost his mind. Accused me of having an affair with Rob. He tried tapping my phone, and I found cameras in the house—even the bathroom and Sasha’ s room. He’s been arrested, but he was released. He won’t leave us alone. We came home last night after Sasha’s dance recital to find Sasha’s cat dead and nailed to the side of the house. Sasha is terrified. The police have been notified again, but I’m scared. I don’t know what to do. Please help.
The pilot had already made the announcement that they were less than thirty minutes from landing in Jackson Hole. Ryker already had a rental vehicle lined up, and he never checked a bag. He’d be at Molly and Sasha’s door in under an hour.
Molly O’Shea. The widow of one of Ryker’s best friends. Of his brother in arms.
Brendan O’Shea had been the salt of the motherfucking earth.
He was the guy who reminded them all of what they were fighting for. He was the guy who grounded them when shit got way too fucking real and bleak as fuck.
He was the guy who wasn’t afraid to hug his brothers, to tell them he loved them and to check in with a call or a text message just because . He was the guy who reminded them that it was okay to cry, it was okay to feel, and it was okay to not be okay.
And he was the brother who took his own life, because while he was busy making sure everyone else was okay, he was battling his own demons behind the veil of his charismatic smile. Because what he saw and experienced in the field, fighting the Hellspawn of the earth and protecting the innocent was too much for him to bear.
Not a day went by they didn’t all think about Brendan and about what they could have done to help him. To save him from himself the way Brendan had saved them all from themselves at least once.
Guilt took up permanent residence in each of their hearts and they eased that pain just the smallest bit by making sure Brendan’s wife Molly and their daughter Sasha were always taken care of .
But over the years, Ryker’s constant presence in Molly and Sasha’s life—helping them move to a bigger house, building them a fence and Sasha a playhouse, fixing drywall and spraying insulation in the attic, it all turned into more than just Ryker showing up for Brendan.
His heart got tangled up in the mess, and he showed up for Molly, too.
If he wanted to be quick about it, he’d take a detour on his way to Molly’s, stop at the stalker’s house—because he already had the guy’s address and every other bit of information about him—and dispose of the creep.
He was a master at making things look like an accident.
He was a master at making people disappear and never found again.
One of his many nicknames among him and his brothers was Mr. Clean. Because he never left a fingerprint, let alone a drop of blood or a muddy footprint. He’d taken care of more and enough bad guys in his career that he could probably erase a crime scene in his sleep or with a blindfold on.
But this was Molly and Sasha he was talking about.
He wouldn’t be doing anything with a blindfold.
He first needed to get to their house and find out how they were, then create a plan. He’d reach out to local law enforcement and see what they were doing besides placing a vehicle outside Molly’s house. Yes, the perp had been arrested, but now he was out. Free to terrorize again. Hopefully, Sasha didn’t have any more pets that the soccer coach could get his hands on.
The pilot touched down flawlessly on the tarmac and Ryker was off the plane and running across the asphalt toward the door less than a minute later, his carry-on duffle bag slung over his shoulder.
He grabbed his rental pickup truck at the front desk and shot off a quick text to Molly.
In JH. On my way to you now.
He didn’t need to punch her address into the GPS. Making his way to Molly was also something he could do in his sleep.
In fact, she often came to him in his dreams .
Which had him waking up guilty as fuck because what they did in his dreams, what he did with his best friend’s wife in his dreams, was nothing short of filthy and depraved and fifty-six shades of wrong.
He could put his desires aside. He always did and always would. Molly needed his help and he would do everything in his power to protect her and Sasha. It was a vow they all made at Brendan’s funeral and one they all continued to uphold.
Regardless of his feelings, he would help Molly. He would always help Molly.
His heart would heal later. Like it always did when he said goodbye to the woman he loved.
“Uncle Ryker!” Sasha said, her long, gangly teenager legs in short-shorts, carrying her down the cobblestone path from the front door to the driveway. She threw herself into his arms as he grabbed his duffle bag from the backseat.
“Holy shit, half-pint. What the hell are you eating? Fertilizer? You’ve grown like five inches since I saw you last.”
She let go of him and stepped back, beaming. “Maybe because it’s been over a year since you’ve been here. People grow up, you know.”
A police officer was already getting out of their car and cautiously making his way across the lawn.
“It’s okay, Lenny. Ryker is a friend. He’s here to help,” came the soft, feminine voice of Molly from the front door.
Lenny nodded, glanced at Ryker, who smiled and waved, then the cop returned to his patrol car.
“I’m taller than Mom,” Sasha beamed, glancing at her mother who, standing at only five-foot-two, was as petite and sweet as Ryker remembered. She took her time meeting them in the driveway, her green eyes bright and full of joy as she stared at him with a wide smile .
“She is taller than me. She’s going to be tall like her dad,” Molly said with pride as she reached them and lifted onto her tiptoes to hug Ryker. She smelled like she always did, of sunshine, almonds and gardenias. It was a unique scent just to her and one that drove Ryker wild. She held on for just an extra half-second and he covertly buried his nose in her strawberry blonde waves, before she released him. “It’s good to see you, Ryker. It’s been way too long.”
“That’s what I said,” Sasha chided. “Do we smell or something? Why has it been over a year?”
Heat infused his cheeks from both women chastising him. “I know.” He scratched the back of his neck. “I’m sorry.”
“Well, you’re here now. Thank you for coming on such short notice.” Molly’s expression turned grim. “Let’s go inside and we’ll fill you in.”
He followed Sasha and Molly into their quaint but well-kept bungalow. It wasn’t too big. Just the right size for a mother and daughter. The yard wasn’t huge, so Molly could easily maintain it herself. When they first moved in, Ryker, Aaron and Rob flew out for a week and put in a nice big deck for her off the French doors. They also painted her fence and replaced her gutters.
Molly never asked them to do any of it. She said she could just as easily hire someone, but she was Brendan’s wife and Ryker and his brothers swore to take care of her. All they had to do was call her, check in, and ask what she needed. She knew better now than to tell them she didn’t need anything. That didn’t stop them from flying out. It just made them fly out sooner.
“Guestroom is all ready for you,” Molly said, closing the door behind them. “You know where it is.”
Yes, he did. Across the hall from Molly’s room.
“I can take your bag to your room, Uncle Ryker,” Sasha said, forcing him to relinquish his duffle bag to the lanky teen. She disappeared down the hallway, leaving Ryker and Molly alone.
“I’m sorry again for pulling you away from the wedding,” she said, wringing her hands together in front of her as she made her way into the kitchen. The marble-topped island that Ryker, Decker and Cal installed a few years ago sat looking just as new as the day they finished, only this time it had a big pitcher of lemonade on it with three glasses.
She knew he was a sucker for a tart homemade lemonade.
“Wedding was yesterday. It’s all good. The happy couple is getting ready to head out on their honeymoon. Deck’s staying to help Asher around the ranch while Nate is away. It was good to have us all there together. Never happens anymore. You were surely missed.” Sasha rejoined them. “You both were.”
“Next wedding we go no matter what, Mom,” Sasha said. “I can miss a dance recital.”
“I think Decker and Ryker are the only two single soldiers left,” Molly teased. “Not a lot of weddings left to go to.”
“Uncle Cal and Hannah haven’t gotten married yet, though, right? There still needs to be a wedding.”
“Less people are making it official these days.”
“Too expensive,” Ryker murmured.
“Among other things,” Molly replied ruefully. She picked up the pitcher of lemonade and poured three glasses. She didn’t even bother to ask him if he wanted one. She knew the answer. Everyone and anyone who knew Ryker knew the answer.
He took a long sip and sighed as he swallowed. Damn, that was good.
“Sasha made this batch,” Molly said, making a puckered face. “Oof, not enough sugar.”
“I think it’s perfect,” Ryker said, draining his glass. “Perfect, Sash, don’t change a thing.”
His favorite teenager in the world grinned at him over the rim of her glass.
“So, let’s get down to brass tacks here,” Ryker said. “Tell me about this lunatic.”