Chapter 53
Lily
M y heart was suspended in the air as l'ascenseur...ooh fancy!... took us from the ground floor past tourists climbing the hundreds of steps and snapping pictures. The long-standing metallic nuts and bolts held together seven thousand tonnes of wrought iron. Giant wheels turned as we went up to the second floor, which was over three hundred feet off the ground, by the way. The lattice framework made it easy to see everything at once: the mechanics, the people, and Paris growing smaller and smaller beneath our feet.
Ethan had ensured a private elevator. Ryan kept smiling at me when our eyes met before looking away at his phone. Though there was room in the lift, we were all close together. Ethan's thumb was stroking the back of my hand, Eric was holding the other, and Matt was perched against the glass behind me, as he claimed he was enjoying the view. I couldn't look at him.
Despite how strong the construction claimed to be, I couldn't stop myself from thinking something was going to break. Which was nerve-wracking and romantic all at the same time. I know. It's weird. But the tension from our earlier chat was still very much ripe, and the intrusive idea that we could somehow collapse to our death was creating quite the rhythm in my chest and belly. And that was competing with the flutter against my clit. I kept imagining that Ryan wasn't just looking at me, but he was also looking at Matt behind me, and the thought of that made me want to feel them all inside me.
There wasn't a chance in hell of that happening though. I loved my life more than I savored making love to my men. I love my life. Huh. That's a hell of a thing to say. I wouldn't say I hated living before. At some point, I didn't want to die. But I wasn't exactly in love with living either. I was taking it day by day. As my heart breathes a new breath, however, I find myself yearning for the next moment, the next day I want to spend with my men. Not ready for it all to end yet. Interesting.
"You okay?" Ryan mouthed when he looked up at me again.
I nodded and smiled.
"It's okay, I used to get a little queasy in the beginning too," he smiled back.
Ethan raised my hand to his lips. Only when he kissed the back of my hand and the tension eased did I realize that I'd been squeezing the hell out of his fingers the whole time.
"Me too," Eric assured me. "But wait till you see the second floor."
"Oh, it'll be nothing compared to you. You're breathtaking in that dress," Matt rumbled, making that flutter beat more rapidly.
"Okay, Mr. One-up," Eric rolled his eyes. "You do look divine in that dress. I can't wait to get you out of it." He moved closer to my ear and let his breath do crazy things to my body.
I thought the opportunity to dine in such luxury required an elegant dress. So I put on a long satin thin-strapped dark red dress with low-heeled sandals to match. When I stepped out, I felt like a fool as the guys were dressed in sweats. Assuring me that I definitely had the right idea, they hurried back in to get changed into trousers and button-down shirts.
Ryan went for a looser fit, opened at the chest. Ethan and Eric went for something closer to their bodies to accentuate their muscles. And Matt went for a crisp white long-sleeved shirt tucked into grayish-blue, steam-pressed pants to complement his eyes.
I couldn't even begin to imagine how much their colognes cost. Plus Eric popped out a fuckboy cross earring I'd never seen him wear. With his hair pulled back in a low bun and his reddish-brown beard trimmed not too low, it fucking suited him. Ryan's gold necklace and matching bracelet reflected the sun, and my tongue was somehow inspired to lick where they rested.
Ethan's arms were bursting out of his shirt. His only accessory was a white gold watch that must have cost more than all of my life's savings. And Matt went with a simpler silver necklace resting just above his chest hair. It was like I was surrounded by a walking catalog of sexy men, and they were definitely getting the looks. Was it any wonder that I wanted to jump on them every few seconds since we'd been here?
As the elevator jerked to a stop and the sliding doors creaked open, I kept hold of Ethan and Eric's hands. If I had more hands, I'd hold on to Matt's and Ryan's too. There was no harm in making sure everyone knew who they were with. Matt and Ryan didn't make it hard to tell though, walking close to me and taking time to look at me in utter and complete love...or was that lust? Either way, they had me convinced I was the most beautiful woman in Paris, even though I knew that was far from true.
But in comparison to the view ahead, no one gave a damn. Ethan wasn't wrong. Standing on solid unmoving ground again, I took a deep breath and moved closer. All thoughts, all fears, all weight left my body.
It was magical.
Despite the hundreds of tourists oohing and ahhing, amongst the view of the river, the bridge, the boats, the buildings, the lush, manicured landscape everywhere as if it was mandatory for it to look that pristine every single day, and the tiny cars on the road, and what seemed like all of Paris, I stood there with my men as if there was no one else around us. My fear of heights—well, I wouldn't say it was a fear of heights, more like a fear of a moving object floating hundreds of feet in the air— diminished as I walked toward the enclosed edge, the wind blowing my hair off my face.
"Is it immature if I stand on the railing and yell, 'I'm queen of the world!' for all of Paris to hear?" My hands tingled as I gripped the railing, and my feet started to sweat against the sole of my strappy sandals, sparking electricity through my nerves and tingling through every inch of my body.
"You're my queen." Ethan's arms wrapped around the small of my waist, and I eased back against him as he nuzzled my neck.
"Well, damn, Ethan. You took the words right out of my mouth." Eric leaned in to give me a quick kiss, smiling afterward in a way that made my blood heat.
"Same here," Matt and Ryan echoed together before looking at each other.
It was dangerous to be this hot and bothered in such a public place. I had to clench my legs together and pray no one could see how stiff my nipples were. It was a rather drafty dress, so they could think it had something to do with that. Next time, wear nipple covers.
"It's beautiful, Ethan. Thank you." I turned around to kiss him. "Now, you're not the only one with a surprise. I know I don't have a gift of this magnitude..."
"Being with you is the greatest gift I could ever ask for..." He held me tighter and pressed me against his tempting body. I blushed like I'd never heard him say these things to me before.
"Stop. You're making me wet. And I'm wearing satin," I whispered.
"Hmmm," he groaned.
"Ethan!" I grinned and took his hand. "Let's go take our seats. I have something to show you."
"Just him?" Matt echoed.
"Seriously. Behave. Until we get back to the hotel." I smiled back at him. I did not want to get up from my seat and leave here with a wet spot on the back of my dress, so I focused on my mother instead, and well, that dried me up. It was also a bad idea because it brought her negative voice back, trying to ruin things.
Matt ended up leading the way. As it turned out, I didn't know where I was going. When each of them grabbed hold of my chair to pull it out for me, I clamped my legs together to ease the pressure. Who knew I got off on being claimed in public like this? There was a time this would have had me cringing so hard.
"Okay, so..." I reached for my purse.
"Uh, uh. Hold on, you're not the only one who's come bearing gifts, and I'm sure yours is going to top mine. Then I'll be too embarrassed to share it." He scrunched his face.
"Oh, psh." I rolled my eyes. "There's no world in which that could be true."
"Oh, there is. We'll save the best for last," he insisted.
"Okay," I groaned. "I was wondering why you had that backpack over your shoulders. Thought you might be getting back into vlogging."
"Well, speaking about getting back into stuff. Ryan mentioned that he didn't bring his camera..." Matt pulled out a massive professional camera.
Ryan jumped up. "Is that the newest release?"
"Aw, I thought he wasn't your boyfriend..." Eric teased as Ethan snickered.
"Today's about Lily..." Ethan started.
"This IS about Lily." He tilted his head.
A man, immaculately dressed, started wheeling a suitcase toward us. I looked at the guys to gauge whether or not I should be startled by this stranger. Matt gave me a smile and wiggled his brows. I furrowed mine.
Speaking in French, the man unzipped the suitcase, and my mouth fell open. All I had before was a paint palette, the primary colors in acrylic, scalpel, easel, canvas, and the necessary high-quality brushes. But this was an artist's dream.
"This is all for me?" Tears filled my eyes.
"Of course. I thought that IF Ryan and I hook up, not only could we film it, but he could photograph it for your personal collection." He moved closer so that he could whisper against my lips.
"Ugh. Come on. We're about to have breakfast," Ethan groaned.
"Shut up. You're just jealous," Ryan jested.
"Jealous of who? You and Ryan? Ha!" Ethan laughed in the background of Matt's hypnotic stare.
"Why are you so bad?" I moaned, just as Matt moved in the rest of the way to claim a kiss.
Yup, that damp spot was definitely going to be there now. Thanks a lot, Matt.
"Didn't I hear you say something about liking bad guys?" He smiled.
"I never said that. I like good guys. And it doesn't get any better than you. All of you." I ran my fingers through Matt's freshly cut short brown hair.
"Well, we can't help being perfect." Eric's hand found mine under the table.
I grinned. "Now, my gift's going to be cheesy."
Ethan reached across the table and took my hand. "I'm sure it's going to be priceless."
"And perfect. Just like you." Matt leaned in for a kiss.
"Don't you mean you?" I threw my arms around his neck. "All of you." I smiled at each of them.
Yes, I knew I was including Ryan in that all, okay? And it wasn't because I'd suddenly lost my memory. But he didn't actually hit me, did he? He almost did. And yes, it was terrifying that there could be a next time that he would.
But we were in Paris, okay? Let me live.
By all of his friends' accounts, Ryan wasn't violent before and something had shifted in him since the kidnapping. I knew that didn't excuse it. But for some reason, I couldn't see him the way I saw Marco and my serpent dead 'dad'. Maybe that meant I still had some healing to do.
For now, though, could I just exist in the fantasy of Paris, the Eiffel Tower, my four beautiful men whom I loved, even if I couldn't bring myself to fully surrender my heart and body to Ryan, yet? Tell me that was allowed.
With a deep breath, I pulled out my phone and looked into their encouraging faces. "Okay, so I know I'm no pro, but I wanted to do something that would honor you." My cheeks heated. My heart was pounding. It's so silly that I'm nervous, I thought to myself, smiling. "You know those videos I've been filming? I put them in a vlog. I figured when you guys start filming again, maybe I can be a part of the journey. We can get our own little ship name." I squinted my eyes at Eric who chuckled.
"I thought I took those videos with my ex down." He pondered.
"You did. But the people in the comments won't let it go," I started.
"You checked?" He interrupted me with a grin.
"Of course I did." I pursed my lips. "And whoever isn't still pining after your old relationship, they're pining after all of you. I thought I'd fix that."
"What do you mean?" Ethan asked.
Don't look so worried. I thought to myself. What did he think I did? Go through each and every comment and tell them off or something? I wasn't crazy.
Placing the phone in the center of the table, I waited for their eyes to light up, their cheeks to flush and for them to reach across the table, competing for my lips, grabbing me in places they shouldn't with public eyes upon us, while they read the caption on top of a photo of them sleeping. 'Am I not the luckiest woman in the world? Soon to be Mrs.' The caption was accompanied by a link to my vlog. At least Ryan smiled when Ethan scrolled and he saw a picture of himself on the couch, sleeping.
Matt clicked the link. I was watching all their reactions, so I noticed the gulp.
"Is there a problem?" I asked, unable to keep my thoughts to myself any longer. "I thought you guys would be happier."
"We are happy." Eric smiled, but I wasn't an idiot. It didn't reach his eyes.
My belly started rolling over, a sickness rumbling in its guts. "Are you guys..."
Ethan tsked. "Are we what? Aw, Lily. Don't look so disappointed. We love it. Genuinely."
Swallowing the bile in the back of my throat, I asked a nonsensical question that went against all their public displays of affection. "Are you guys ashamed of me?"
I couldn't help but wonder if they were okay with showing me off around their family and in Paris where no one knew us, but my thoughts were taking me all over the place. Was that why we'd never leave the new house? Was that why they bought such a huge house on a private island so no one else would have to know? Was showing our love to their audience a step too far? An internal gasp. Was a polyamorous relationship bad for marketing? Was that why they hadn't posted since we'd dated?
All the questions must have been bulging out of my brain and tattooing across my forehead as they sought an exit through my skin, because Ryan reached out and gripped my shoulder. "Lily? Are you okay?"
"Lily. We're sorry. It's just a bit of a shock, that's all. Of course we're proud to show you off." Eric always had that ability to somehow read my thoughts.
Their reaction didn't make sense, though. It shouldn't come as that much of a surprise. Unless they were worried about my vlogging abilities. Don't be stupid. Wow, I loved my internal voice. Such a loving and gentle critic. Okay, I was overreacting. As soon as my body was allowing me to relax, like whiplash, a thought cracked me on the back of the head. They're hiding something.
No, no. Not this again. Nothing was going to ruin this happiness we'd rediscovered with each other.
Matt
"It's going to be okay," I assured them.
"Yeah. Tyler said we have nothing to worry about. So, who cares if our faces are out there?" Eric smoothed his hand over his low messy bun.
"It's just going to take some getting used to. It's not so long ago that we were on the run, trying to stay hidden. We don't have to hide anymore. Right?" Ethan looked between Ryan and Eric, since they were the ones who spoke to Tyler and were convinced we were in the clear.
"Right," Eric nodded.
Ryan didn't.
"Right?" Ethan asked Ryan again.
He cleared his throat. "Mm-hm. Yeah."
"Never mind Ryan," Eric said. "He has a bad feeling about everything." Sensing the selfishness of his own words, he dialed it back. "It's gonna be okay, alright?" He made eye contact with Ryan before giving him a pat on the shoulder. "As Ethan said, it's just going to take some time getting used to being free again. What's the worst that could happen? The only people who know what we did are the four of us, Tyler and apparently the people he sorted it out with. It's just a couple pictures and a vlog with our woman showing us off on her social media. I mean, we're living our lives again. That was bound to be a part of it soon enough, yeah? It's okay."
"Yeah." I nodded and rubbed Ryan's arm. He took a deep breath and nodded along with us.
"Now, let's go inside our hotel room and thank our woman properly for her gift, instead of pretending as if it's going to be the end of us. Well, all three of us." He lifted his brows at Ryan. "Unless Matt wants to keep your company?"
"No. I'll be alright. Tell her I love her. And uh...I'm sorry, I guess." Ryan cleared his throat.
His eyes went blank.
"I mean, you can tell her that." I pulled on his bicep and tugged him forward.
Lily was in the king-sized bed with the deep red blinds pulled. She was polishing her nails. When she looked up at us, she spotted Ryan.
Her throat caved in. "Are you also staying with us?"
There was no hiding the way her nipples beaded through her top.
"No, uh. I'll be staying next door. I just wanted to see you again before I went off on my own..." he started.
She frowned.
He caught his words. "What? Did I say something wrong?"
Lily nibbled her bottom lip. "No..um. I just thought that maybe you guys would...well...then I thought you might stay to watch or...let me watch. I don't know."
His lips turned up at the edges.
So did hers. She looked at me. "I can't wait to break my new paint set in."
I grinned, grateful that the awkwardness at the breakfast table had skipped the need for a discussion.
"So, uh. Did you want us to leave?" Eric pointed between himself and Ethan.
"Of course not." She put her nail polish aside and groaned. "Just give me a minute for these nails to dry, then I'm all yours."
"Fuck the nails," Ethan rumbled.
"No, it's going to get everywhere." She backed up as Eric and Ethan advanced on her, taking off their clothes.
"Well, we'll just have to be careful getting you out of your clothes, aren't we?" Eric's voice dipped low.
She grinned. My body was on fire, but when I turned to look at Ryan, he was distant.
Hoarse, I asked, "What's the matter? Wanna sit this one out?"
"Hmm?" Ryan looked at me like I had just appeared there. "Uh, yeah." He turned to look at Eric sliding Lily's top up over her stretched out arms and Ethan being less careful with the shorts.
"Ethan! You're going to get them stained! I just bought those!" she chided.
"You can buy new ones." He tossed them aside and moved between her legs.
"And the hotel sheets?" she asked, looking up at him as she fell on her back and the polish on her fingers went everywhere.
"We'll buy new ones as well," he groaned, pinning her hands above her head.
"I spent a lot of time painting these nails, even got perfect little swirls on them and everything," she moaned as Eric moved into the crook at her side and covered a breast with his hand, the other with his mouth.
"You don't have to do your nails yourself anymore, remember?" Ethan said, just as she gasped and started begging for him.
He covered her mouth with his and slipped inside her. The delicious sound of satisfaction ripped through me and made my cock sturdy. If I was being honest, the last thing I wanted to be doing right then was checking in with Ryan. Fuck, my body craved hers.
"I'm not really in the frame of mind to watch what I can't have." He half-smiled and turned toward the door.
"Are you going to be okay?" I pulled myself from the sight of Ethan's big body claiming Lily's and her taking him like a champ. Fuck, I think I even whimpered somewhere in the back of my throat.
"Yeah, of course I am." He rolled his eyes. "Go enjoy yourself."
I'm sorry. I'm an ass. His words gave me such relief, I was walking out of my clothes over to Lily.
"Hey, big guy. Make room for me." I slapped Ethan on the shoulder. His eyes went wicked and his lips tilted upwards.
Lily's eyes popped open and she groaned. "Where's Ryan?"
"He didn't want to watch what he can't have." I climbed on the bed. "I, on the other hand, want to celebrate what a privilege it is to make love to my woman. I need to be inside you so bad."
She panted as Eric reached between her and Ethan and stroked her clit. "Want to get behind me?"
Eric's head popped off her breast. "I know I'm always down for watching, but fuck Lily, I've been bursting to have you since this morning. I don't know if I can wait. I'd like that position if you don't mind."
She licked her lip.
"It's fine. I'll watch." I swallowed my disappointment.
Ethan groaned and picked Lily up so that Eric could slip behind her. Before Eric could insert himself, however, Ethan gave away the reason for his earlier wicked grin.
"Wait." He stopped Eric who grumbled, but busied himself with kissing Lily's neck.
"Don't stop." Lily protested as Ethan paused.
"Oh, don't worry. I plan on lasting until you get sick of me." He stroked her cheek before moving in closer to rumble against her lips. "Have you ever had two men inside your pussy at once?"
Lily's mouth fell open on a gasp. With Ethan's cock still inside her pussy, she started grinding her hips, bringing herself over the edge at record speed. Ethan's head fell back as she brought him close. He gripped the sheet in an effort to hold himself back. My cock ached from the throbbing.
Eric groaned against her neck, grabbing her breasts as she cried out. "Can you take them both while I'm in your ass?"
Her breath came out as a wheeze, her head fell back on his shoulder and she dug her nails in his upper thighs. "Yes."
"What?" My heart was about to drill a hole through my chest. "I can wait."
"I want you all inside me now." She fucking growled, pinning me with a 'no-fucking around' stare.
I had about one brain cell left that was capable of being rational. When she reached out and wrapped her hand around my cock, that brain cell flew out the window.
"Now." Lily demanded. "Please." She whimpered.
I looked at the tight way Ethan's filled her hole. As much as I wanted to get in there, there was absolutely no way.
"We're going to split you open." I reached out for that swollen erected flesh and she started winding those hips down on Ethan's thick rod, breathless as Eric breached her hole.
In the nick of time, Ethan burst. "Fuck!" He cursed himself.
I grinned. "Thank God."
Pushing him out of the way, I hurried to take his place, sinking deep inside her. Without any warning, I hammered her pussy with my cock, the sweet heat of her turning me into a madman. She gasped at the competing paces between Eric and me.
Lily reached for me, but I was obsessed with the view of her body. Flushed. Her modest tits bounced along with the pounding. Her pussy tightened around my cock. Fuck, when I couldn't stand it anymore, my lips found hers. I wasn't concerned with what Eric was doing, I was about to explode. Her nails dug into my back, her lips came up to my neck, sucking hard. There was sweat pouring off me as my lungs begged for air. I'd gladly pass out.
A rainbow of colors flashed before my eyes. The world went dark. My body imploded. My cock exploded. I was burst apart like fragmented dust particles in the air. Lily was still moaning in the distance and when I caught my breath, Eric was still fucking her.
It was like an art piece, watching her pleasure make her abandon all her inhibitions. Her mouth hung open as she was being robbed of oxygen. Her back arched upward like mine often did when Ryan was in there. I couldn't control it. I knew she couldn't either. It was too much all at once, but so fucking good. Eric relaxed the arch so that she didn't tighten up too much. Wanting to be her cheerleader, I slipped back into position and started kissing her neck. Her eyes opened when my fingers found her clit and then her soaking pussy, dripping with both mine and Ethan's cum.
"Next time, I want you both inside my pussy." She rode my fingers and Eric's cock.
"Always so greedy. Sometimes the thought is better than the thing itself. I love you too much to hurt you." I shifted from two fingers to four, and she whimpered. "Maybe we'll get you some toys to see if you like it first."
I didn't think it was possible for her pussy to get wetter, but it did. My thumb stroked her clit while the other four fingers summoned her pleasure. Fuck, my balls twitched as her forehead fell against mine. As Eric came against her ass, she tightened around my fingers, spasming, unable to form words. I watched in awe, kissing her neck again, finger-fucking her pussy, squeezing her breast with my free hand, pulling on her nipple. Tears came to her eyes and streamed down her cheeks before she fell on top of me, heaving. I wrapped my arms around her, kissing the side of her face. Eric showered her ass with kisses before flopping down next to us.
Ethan spanked a cheek and kissed up her spine before murmuring in her ear. "That's how much we loved your gift."
She laughed. "Good."