19
Maeve
I heard him before he even opened the shower door. I felt his gaze watching me from the other side of the bathroom. It was hard not to physically feel his presence when he was around. I quietly continued doing what I was doing as he watched me. Something about showering while he just leaned back on the counter was erotic.
What I didn’t expect to happen was when he took off his board shorts and opened the glass door. Even more unexpected was when his hard, thick body pulsed behind mine. When his burly arms reached around my neck and down my chest, I felt all the air escape from my lungs. We had just gone over this. It was a constant back-and-forth battle, fighting this natural chemistry between us.
When I felt his hands tighten against my chest and pull me in closer to him, I didn’t fight it. As the water from the shower rained down on us, I let him press his mouth to my shoulder blade. A slight moan escaped from my lips.
“Don’t make those noises,” Christian all but growled at me.
“Or what?”
“Or I won’t be able to stop.” His lips moved from one end of my shoulder up toward my neck, where he kept pressing his mouth to my skin. It wasn’t a full kiss and felt more explorative than anything. I could feel something hard press up against my back, and from what I felt, he was thick and desperate.
“This is a terrible idea,” I muttered softly through quiet moans that I couldn’t help but make as his lips made contact with my skin.
“It is a horrible one,” he agreed when he slowly pulled my hair away from my ear and pressed his mouth toward the shell of it.
His one hand moved toward my jawline, and he pushed my head up so I was turned in toward his chest while his other hand trailed down my stomach. Having two kids, I was always self-conscious of the little pooch I had after them, but the way that Christian didn’t even say anything, didn’t shy away from touching every part of me, only made me realize that I was desperate for him to touch me. So fucking desperate.
“So fucking perfect,” he murmured into my ear as his hand on my jawline tightened, holding me in place. His fingers were now dangerously close to my core as he pushed my thighs apart slightly, making me gasp for the very bit of air left in my lungs.
“Christian,” I threatened as his fingers slid around my opening.
“Mmm, just as I expected. You’re already so fucking wet.” Oh God. My body was not working together with my mind. Everything about this told me to run away. He had just been with someone else last night. My body didn’t agree. It was begging him to taste, touch, and fuck me.
In one swift motion, he spun me around, our bodies now facing each other, his fingers still teasing the entrance to my core. Our breaths were ragged, and I knew that if we stayed in this damn shower any longer, we'd risk unraveling everything we had just painstakingly built.
"I bet you taste like my newest addiction," he murmured, his gaze fixed on me.
Those words hit me like a bolt of lightning. Addiction. I couldn't explain why, but something about that word jolted me back to reality. Maybe it was the way his piercing blue eyes bore into mine, driven solely by desire. Whatever the reason, I couldn't let it consume us. With a sudden burst of strength, I pushed him away.
"Stop," I managed to utter, my voice shaky. He stood there, cornered by the shower as the water continued to pour down behind us. I slowly backed away, struggling to catch my breath. Grabbing a towel from the counter, I wrapped it tightly around myself. When I glanced back, he had turned around, shielding his face from my view. His hands were covering his face, and he looked so sullen like he knew.
I couldn’t help but let Tatum’s words sink into me. He was just replacing one addiction with another. I refused to let myself be anyone’s addiction. A mutual partner, sure, but never their complete obsession, especially if it was in an unhealthy way. I hated to admit it, but I cared too much about Christian to ever let him use me and then suddenly have regrets about it or throw me out. There was more than just me to think about here, especially with the girls coming tomorrow.
I turned around to head out the door that led to my bedroom.
“Maeve.” His voice was barely a whisper, almost unrecognizable. It sounded vulnerable and scared. I didn’t turn back because I feared that if I did, I would immediately rush into his arms to provide comfort. He needed to learn how to find solace within himself first before I ran into his arms, giving him what he longed for.
“Yeah?” I responded, my voice trembling. He was wounded, and my own inner child longed to go over and tend to his wounds. I was a fixer, always putting others before myself. But it was time for a change. It was time for me to prioritize my own well-being.
I walked out of the door, shutting it firmly but briefly pressing my back against it. Leaving him behind was tough, but I had to remind myself that I was making this decision for both of us. Right?
I didn’t sleep much last night and spent most of the evening tossing and turning, anticipating today. I had to work the second shift at work, so I was likely to run late for the girls’ pickup.
When I finally got dressed in a denim skort and work shirt, which was part of our uniform at the brunch restaurant, I noticed Christian had already left for work. He usually went over surveillance footage with James at Elio’s clubs on days that Julian didn't have him out. I had a slow start to the morning, and Tyler texted to confirm he had dropped the girls off at their daycare school.
I obsessively went over the two rooms, making sure the two girls would feel comfortable. I know it’ll be a change for them, so I think the nerves were just getting to me. I texted Christian to see if he was able to get them at their school. I had already put him on the preferred pickup list at their center.
Maeve: Hey. I have a second shift today. I should be able to get them at 4 p.m., but should I ask my mom to get them if I am running late?
This was a stupid idea. I should probably ask my mom to get them or let Stephen do it, even if it got me in trouble. It wasn’t but seconds later when I saw Christian’s bubbles on my phone like he was typing.
Annoying Roomie: I already told you, firecracker. I will get them. Just send me the details.
We didn’t speak to each other after what happened last night in the shower, but after reading his nickname for me in his text, somehow my chest already felt lighter. Things could go back to normal for us.
I quickly texted him the pickup details and then got in my car and headed out to work. I would be a solid half hour early, but I wanted to prove I could be on time now with my new “boyfriend.” No, rather my male roommate who is faking being my boyfriend, who I almost let finger fuck me in the shower last night, and I couldn’t stop thinking about since.
Fucckkk.