Chapter 22
Aiden
“To make things painfully clear to you, just because I’m going along with this little scheme doesn’t mean this is a dictatorship,” Mia reminds me dryly.
I take a bite of my food and watch her as I chew.
She’s feisty and persistent, which tells me she’s gone through some shit in her life she doesn’t talk about.
My curiosity has finally inspired me to dig, and I’ll know exactly who Mia Crawford is as soon as Stone comes back with the info I requested tonight.
The sight of her choking on my cock made me realize that the only way I’m gonna be able to fight my desire is to find out I was right, that Mia is a little spy.
I haven’t decided yet what outcome I’m hoping for.
“Why do you feel the need to anticipate the next step?” I glance down at her untouched food. “And Dottie prepared that for you.” I mention the house chef. “So you eat.”
“What part of this isn’t a dictatorship do you not understand?” she challenges.
“Eat,” I order.
I watch as she relents, picking up her fork. “I’m only eating because this does look delicious, not because you told me to.”
“Of course,” I retort sarcastically, taking a bite. This food is always perfect. Dottie makes everything from scratch, and the way Mia leans back in her seat and moans is confirmation.
“You need to take a bite with a little bit of everything, then you’ll see,” I order as I do just that.
“No.” She swallows, wrinkling her nose, before taking another scoop of mashed potatoes. “One thing at a time. Meat doesn’t touch potatoes or veggies.”
I grin at her as I chew, then gather another bite with every single thing on my plate and shovel it in.
“And I don’t like surprises,” she says, before licking the last bit of gravy from her fork. “That’s why I like to know the next step.”
I eye her up for a moment, as if those bright blue eyes could give me the answers about who she is. Why she’s been on a bike before, why she’s strangely fucking strong and knows how to fight. And lastly, what the fuck she’s doing working at my club.
“Why don’t you like surprises?” I’m beyond asking for recon purposes. I just want to know.
She takes another piece of her meatloaf and swirls it around in her gravy, thinking. “I don’t talk about it.” She shrugs.
“Yeah, that isn’t gonna work for me,” I tell her, analyzing her.
“I need to know everything about you, Mia. You don’t realize the kind of man you’re dealing with in Dagger.
He fixates. Dwells. Watches. He’ll watch you and me, together.
Claiming you may protect you, but we also just gave him a real good challenge. ”
“That’s what I don’t get. Frankly,” she says, taking a sip of her drink, “you don’t seem like the kind of man who would put up with that sort of shit around your club. I would’ve thought that a man like you would take care of that problem.”
“Are you asking me to take care of him?” I query.
“If the shoe fits,” she retorts. Christ. I can’t figure her out. There are times she talks to me like a fucking cop would.
“This isn’t the fucking Sopranos.” I hold my glass up for Ruth to fill it as she approaches, ready to pour. “There are rules.”
She doesn’t speak, but her eyes search for more as Ruth wanders back to the counter.
“I asked you a question. Why don’t you like surprises?” I don’t fucking trust her, and the evasion sends up even more red flags.
“We’re having two conversations at once.” Mia sets her fork down.
“No, we’re having one. Answer the question,” I urge.
“I lost someone. I didn’t expect it, and then…” She swallows, and grief lines her pretty face. “Then I lost another person. I don’t like…the unknown.”
I lean back to analyze her. It’s obvious whoever it was meant a lot to her. Her eyes tell me it was a profound loss.
“See, that wasn’t so hard,” I tell her. “Who?”
“Who?”
“Who did you lose?” I clarify.
“My dad,” she answers hesitantly. “Then my…my friend. My best friend.” She swallows again, like she’s pushing down tears, and I realize the second wound is fresh.
“Loss is inevitable. Planning ahead or trying to control everything won’t change it.
” I set my fork down on my now empty plate.
“Every decision made by every other person around you can change your trajectory in one split second. So, in order to plan ahead, you’d have to plan the course of every single person who crosses your path.
It’s an impossible feat, and it will drive you fucking crazy. ”
I look down at her perfectly sectioned plate. “It’ll make you do obsessive things, like not letting your meat touch your fucking vegetables.”
She smiles softly, and it’s the first time I’ve ever really seen it aimed at me, and I look away because…I like it. I want it, and instead of pushing her away, I’m forcing her closer, struggling to keep my head straight.
“Keeping your food separate isn’t crazy.”
“Yeah, it is,” I argue. “It’s good to mix it up, Mia, every once in a while. Taste everything together instead of one thing at a time.”
“Is this life advice from the outlaw biker?”
“No, it’s life advice from a man who’s seen things you can’t even imagine.”
Something in her eyes shuts down at my words. She goes from semi-relaxed and conversing like an actual person to completely loathing me. Interesting.
“Tell me why you’re so comfortable on a bike.” I change the subject, and this time, she doesn’t fight me.
“My dad rode. He’d take me for hot chocolate every Sunday. I grew up riding with him.”
Something settles in me. At least that stops me from having to find some ex-boyfriend she rode with and slitting his throat. I accept her answer and don’t press her any more.
“Are you going to let me go home first? Get my toothbrush?” she asks as she leans back against the booth and folds her arms over her ample breasts, eyebrow raised.
I peel enough cash out of my wallet to pay the check. I might technically own the place, but I always pay and tip well.
“No. Not tonight. I have everything you need.” And I wouldn’t put it past Dagger to have someone watching us.
“You heading out, honey?” Ruth Anne makes her way over to our table as I stand.
I kiss the top of her head and hand her a hundred-dollar bill. “For the service.”
She smiles and takes it from me. “Thanks, darlin’.”
Ruth Anne turns to Mia. “Nice to have you here. Beats him sitting there alone grimacing at his food.”
“He still grimaced.” Mia smiles fully at Ruth Anne, and something foreign comes over me. What would it be like to have her smile at me that way more often, to sit here with me when I’m not forcing her to? I run a hand through my hair.
Who the fuck am I?
Merve stands and says good night as we pass.
He lives in a small cabin the next road over and walks here every night.
It’s his only real social interaction since his wife died three years ago.
The staff knows he eats for free, and when his son is in town, he brings him too.
Just the thought of what he went through when his wife died reminds me of why I’ll always be alone.
I’ve only lost one person I cared about, which taught me that with this life, anything I touch is at risk.
It taught me never to care about anyone else again, ever.
“I can’t wait to see your selection of non-chemical face creams and shampoos, since you have everything I need, boss,” Mia tosses over her shoulder as we head out the door.
I remind myself I don’t need to care about her to tear those fucking yoga pants to shreds and sink my cock into her ass just to shut her up.