Chapter 4 ~ Isabella #2
She sighs, “No, but yes. Isabella: Business is always first. You’ll get used to it.”
She stands. “I’ll be out front with James.
Take your time.” His mother gets up and walks away to the door towards James.
He opens it for her as they leave. The crowd is thinning out now.
Everyone is filing out the door, and I grab Anna’s satchel and shoes, meeting her on the dance floor.
We link arms and head out to the waiting car.
We chat and laugh on our way back to Alexanders' house. There are no worries about seeing him tonight, he is staying at the hotel with his brothers.
I thank his mother for a wonderful dinner and I rush out of the car with Anna.
We run through the house, passing Sasha by the door, and head straight to the kitchen, digging in the cupboards for wine and glasses.
Sasha tries to follow us at our pace as we race up to my room like two teenagers.
We get inside, and I smile at Sasha as I close the door in her face.
As Anna takes the bathroom to change into her jammies, I head over to my suitcase and grab my bunny set. I set the wine and glasses on the table and gather up my wilted flower petals, putting them in my bowl.
I open the wine and pour us two glasses. Anna comes out about a half hour later.
“Holy Shit! That bathroom is lit, man. No wonder you locked yourself in there.” She laughs and plunks down on the couch.
I smile, “It’s great, right?” She grabs her wine and takes a sip. “You sure you can’t hang on long enough for that dickhead to come around and be normal? That bathroom might be worth the wait.” She tips her glass at me and takes another sip.
All humor vanishes, and I look away. This moment will be our last time alone together, to be just us, and it feels so much like the goodbye I never wanted to have with her. I can’t hold back and I start to cry.
Anna puts her drink down, jumping closer and holding me. We are both crying now, the snotty hiccup kind that turns your eyes puffy and your nose red. I get up and grab some Kleenex. We blow our noses and try to hold back the emotions.
“We have a lot to discuss, Anna. We only have tonight. After that, I’ll never be alone again.”
Anna straightens up and holds my hand, breaking out into a wide smile.
“Well. Let’s get to it. To freedom!” She snags our wine off the coffee table and hands me my glass.
We sit there for hours; the wine is gone, and we are pretty tipsy by now. But it worked out. Giggles erupt as we continue to refer to ourselves as DD7 rather than 007. We are both double D’s cup size. I guess it’s only funny when you’re drunk.
Anna will somehow contact me once she’s reached out to Helen, and the gift is ready. I already have an envelope I prepared a few days ago in case I told her my plan and I wrapped it in a box to look like a Maid of Honor gift so it wouldn't raise any suspicion.
It has my driver’s license, banking information, and birth certificate inside it. She’s supposed to give it to Helen so she can start the plan.
I somehow have to get to the museum and Anna will distract Sasha and whomever else is on my butt that day. I’ll make a run for the store, and Helen will have the rest already worked out. She’s done this before with many women who needed to disappear.
It sounds easy, but there is no set date or time, so Anna has to be ready the day I walk through those doors. No tears, no goodbyes, I just run.
We were both exhausted, and we climb into bed. Anna curls up facing me, and I turn off the lamp. She grabs my hand in the dark and we just lay there silently.
“Izz? Why get married? You could have bolted days ago if you would have told me.”
I sigh, “I’ve thought about that, Anna. I was trying to keep you out of it, and I’m never alone or out of this room, and there was no way to contact you privately.
Plus, my father will get what he wants, and Alexander will be free to make up some excuse that I’m on some holiday when I don’t appear at functions on his arm. ”
I sigh and roll onto my back, looking up into the dark.
“He was going to get rid of me after tomorrow, anyway.”
I can feel the bed shake as she laughs.
“You’re delusional. He’ll be so pissed. I can’t wait to see his face. So? Why don’t you just wait till he puts your ass up in a condo?”
I squeeze her hand. “No matter how pretty the walls are, Anna, a prison is still a prison.”
We remain silent for a bit. Anna whispers, “What about the wedding night? Are you going to sleep with him?”
My stomach drops and I feel the wine turning rancid in my stomach. “I don’t know, I don’t want to.” Anna shifts to her back.
I ask her, “What about Danny? Are you going to sleep with him?”
She was quiet for a long time.
“Okay, let’s make a pact. We will ride dicks tomorrow night. We each have one, right? Both are grade-A assholes. So… fuck it! Let’s really go out with a bang!”
The way she says it as if we are ordering a pizza, makes me giggle, then it’s full-on laughter, and then Anna laughs as she curls in on herself. We slowly stop after a few last chuckles, both laying on our backs looking at the ceiling in the dark.
“I love you, Izzy.” She says it softly.
I wipe the tears off my face and say, “I love you too, Anna.”
I can hear Anna sniffle, “Get some sleep, bitch, we have a fake wedding to pull off tomorrow and dicks to ride. And I’m going to make sure you’re hot as fuck, so he regrets being such a prick and losing the best thing that would ever have happened to him.”
“Okay.” I smile in the dark.“
~ ~ ~
As soon as I open my eyes in the morning, my gut twists.
Today is the day I will belong to him.
Anna is a flurry of activity, flying around the room setting up the breakfast Sasha brought us.
I try my hardest to be cheerful and a part of her excitement, but I can’t get my anxiety under control.
I threw out my medication, so I can’t take one of my pills, and the idea of drinking any alcohol makes me feel like throwing up after the amount of wine we drank last night.
The conversation and wine kept flowing, even though I’m not a drinker.
I make my way to the bathroom, giving Anna a quick hug on the way there. I do my business, brush my teeth, and go sit on the couch beside her. She’s crunching on toast.
“My god, I could get used to this, Izz.” She waves her hand around the room. “Wake up, roll over. Oh look, here’s your breakfast.” She giggles and takes another bite of her toast.
I grab a plain piece of toast and take a small bite. The crumbs are like grains of sand in my mouth, and I reach for my coffee and take a swallow, slightly swishing it in my mouth to help it go down.
“You can’t eat, can you?” Anna puts her hand on mine.
I just shake my head and put my toast down, looking at her. I can feel my eyes starting to sting. Anna drops her toast quickly onto her plate and pulls me into her arms. The tears flow as soon as I feel her arms around me and she just rubs my back, soothing me.
“Shhh, we will get through this day. Together! She pulls back and looks me in the eye.
“We are going to get you looking hot so you can marry that dick.”
She squints her blue eyes.
“Then we are going to get your ass out of here. Got me?” She lifts my chin. “I mean it!”
I nod. That’s all I can do. I can’t talk or I’ll lose it again.
“Go shower, get under the hot water and just try to breathe, Izz. Chuck in some of that enormous bottle of lavender salts in there. You need to mellow out.”
I smile and get up, “Okay.” Walking to the bathroom, I turn back to look at Anna’s tiny form all tucked up on the couch, eating toast. I smile. I’m so glad she’s here with me this morning.
“My mother and sister will be here soon. I’m not sure what time his mother is coming, but the ceremony is at two this afternoon, so once we shower, it’s going to be nuts in here.”
Anna smiles at me, “My kind of party!” She punches one hand in the air. I laugh and head to the bathroom. I have my hand on the cold brass knob when her soft voice says, “Izz?”
I turn and look at her.
“Fuck them, think of today as the beginning, not the end, okay?” she says as I turn back to her. “We will get you out of here.”
I give her a weak smile and go to the shower.
The morning passes by so fast that I can’t keep my head straight. I’m shoved in a chair and primed and fluffed; I’m in a silk robe sitting in the chair facing the mirror and watching the hairdresser and my mother get into an argument about whether my hair should be up or down.
To me, it doesn’t really matter. It’s not going to make a difference. I twist my fingers together.
The closer I get to marrying him, the more my stomach turns.
The hairdresser tosses the brush onto the vanity, facing my mother. “I have specific instructions from Mr. Russo that the bride’s hair must be up.” She puts her hands on her hips and glares at my mother.
They banter back and forth, tugging my hair up and tossing it down.
“Down,” I say. But no one hears me. I clear my throat.
“I’d like it down, please,” I say loudly.
They both stop immediately and look at me in the mirror. My mother breaks out into a patronizing smile and looks at the hairdresser.
If Alexander wants it up, I’m going to wear it down.
An hour later, I’m in my dress, my hair cascading down my back in a fishtail braid beautifully threaded with pearls and baby breath, and my veil trailing down my back.
The flower bouquet of white roses and orchids shakes in my hand as I stand in front of the door, staring at it. Anna and I are the last ones in the room. She has her hand on the small of my back.
“Let’s do this shit, baby.” She hugs my shoulder, and we head out together to face my impending future.
We arrived at the church. I get out and Anna holds my hand as we make our way to the church doors.
His mother kisses my cheeks and takes me into the side room, where we all take a seat and wait.
My sister smiles at me. My mother is actually being nice, fixing my veil and swiping at imaginary wrinkles.
The door opens and my heart drops. My father is standing there with a smile on his face. “It’s time, Isabella.” He crosses the room and takes me by the shoulders as I stand on shaking legs. “You look beautiful.” He kisses both my cheeks.
My mind spins; this is so weird, my father hates me. Again, another man putting on a show. I follow his lead as he takes my arm and puts it on his forearm as he leads me from the room. Anna and Rebekah are waiting by the double doors.
Anna sends me the “You got this girl” look, and I smile at her. The music starts and the doors open. The girls proceed in and my stomach drops. Oh god, I think I’m going to throw up. I clutch my stomach.
My father grips my chin in a tight grasp, his teeth are clenched together and he snarls. “You fucken smile, keep your head up and don’t trip. Don’t fuck this up this close to the end, Isabella.” He lets go of my chin and flips my veil over my face. He takes my arm and we head to the entrance.
My hands start to shake as I take tentative, careful steps towards the front of the church, where I know Alexander stands, his broad shoulders back, hands clasped in front of him, standing straight with his brothers at his side.
I quickly glance around the room; hundreds of eyes look at me and I die inside. We reach the front, and Alexander steps up to take the hand my father offers him. My father lifts the veil and kisses my cheeks before leaving to go sit with my mother.
Alexander holds my hand tight in his warm palm, leans down and kisses my cheek, his vanilla musk assaulting my nostrils.
“You look beautiful, Isabella.” I still can’t bring myself to look at him. He leads me to the altar and we face the priest. I pull my hand from his and hold my flowers, doing my best to stop them from shaking. Alexander gives me a brooding look and faces the priest once again.
Words are spoken, but I zone out. I can’t think straight except for the fact that I am standing here, going through with this, all the while planning my escape.
Alexander is talking, and he turns me to face him.
But I can’t look him in the eyes; I don’t want to give myself away, so I stare at his lapels, at the beautiful white rose boutonnière pinned to his tux.
“Isabella!” Alexander growls low, tugging my hand slightly. I bring myself out of the fog I was in and glance down. He has my hand in his, and a huge diamond ring is now on my finger.
My chest constricts, and I can feel the sting starting in the back of my eyes. I had hoped that one day, if I was lucky, a ring on my finger would mean I had found someone to truly love me, protect me, and be mine forever.
As I look at it, it feels more like an anchor on my hand weighing me down, a tiny glittering handcuff ending all those hopes and dreams.
Alexander drops my hand; Anna reaches around me and takes my flowers.
Alexander places his left hand in mine and passes me a large platinum ring.
I take it from him and look up at the priest; I say the words he asks me to say, never once looking at Alexander.
With trembling fingers, I push the ring on his left finger; his strong tanned hand clasps mine softly once it’s on.
A tear escapes down my cheek as I look down at his finger. That should have meant something, would have meant something to me with the right man.
Alexander wipes it away, gathering me in his arms to kiss his new bride. I turn my head, finally looking into those cold gray eyes. Another tear falls, and he leans towards me to kiss me. I turn faintly and kiss the corner of his mouth slightly, backing away, and putting my head down.
I thought I was stronger than this. I had it all planned out and sealed my heart. But as I look once again at the shackle on my finger, I am grieving the love I have lost for the man who would have been my entire world.
Alexander places his hand on my back, bringing me under his arm as we face the church full of people.
“Fucken smile, Isabella.” He mumbles low in my ear, kissing the outer shell. So I do.
I mentally shake off despair and step down with him as we make our way to the front of the church as our friends and family clap for the new couple.