12. Ember
CHAPTER 12
EMBER
BURY MY BONES – WHISKEY MYERS
“Where are we going?”
Fisting the steering wheel in stony silence, Hyland glowers at the road ahead. Mr Grump is back in full-swing this morning. After my little adventure, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.
He’s deflected every attempt I’ve made at conversation so far. I expected to be walking into a full-scale argument when he summoned me with a text. Looks like he’s going for the silent treatment.
“Are you expecting me to apologise?”
Nothing.
“Because I’m not going to.”
Snorting, Hyland remains focused on the road.
“You should be apologising for tracking me like some kind of runaway teen! What kind of insane tactic is that?”
Still not a peep. He just stares ahead, strangles the steering wheel and acts like he can’t hear me.
“Fine. Don’t talk to me, then.”
Nothing.
“I won that fight,” I say acerbically. “So if you’re mad at me for sneaking out, perhaps you should pull your head out of your ass and realise that fact.”
His stubbled jaw tics, betraying his annoyance. The grump is mightily mad. He can join the long line of people I’ve pissed off in the last twenty-four hours.
“If Warner hadn’t intervened, I could’ve gotten answers. I know he has information about Gael! He found me! Blaine can help.”
“Don’t call him that,” Hyland finally speaks.
“What?”
“That criminal piece of shit doesn’t get to be on a first name basis with you.”
My laughter bounces around the car. “Oh, grow up.”
“I went back to that fucking warehouse last night to burn it down with him inside.” His head shakes in disappointment. “Too bad the bastard had already cleared out.”
“So you’re mad because he outsmarted you?”
“I’m mad because he’s dangerous, and you can’t see that! You can’t trust Madden!”
Studying his side profile, I try to fathom what goes on in his thick skull. Hyland is complicated. His hot and cold attitude gives me whiplash on a good day, but this feels like something far more complicated.
Neither of them had much to say to me on the drive back to Tom’s apartment last night. I felt like the problem child being sent home from school. After Tom finished yelling at me, I curled up in bed with the sound of fists hitting flesh ringing in my ears.
But it was the first night since I came home that I didn’t dream of Mexico. Gael’s victims. The sound of my skull cracking against concrete. Endless nights spent battling to survive. Debilitating black outs and constant anxiety, never knowing when the next will hit.
My dreams were filled with bottomless onyx eyes and confident smirks instead. While I went looking for answers, I got something else from Blaine. Now I want more.
“I shouldn’t have snuck out,” I try to appease him. “But I don’t regret going to look for Blaine. I’m a part of this case.”
“You’re the heart of it! And we’re trying to protect you.”
“I have the skills and the right to help.”
Hyland harrumphs, scratching his light blonde scruff. “Be careful what you wish for.”
Slumping in the passenger seat, I kick my legs up to rest on the dashboard. “I’m wishing you’d admit that you’re salty about missing my fight.”
“Hah. Dream on.”
“You’re totally jealous because I kicked Blaine’s ass while Warner had you relegated to the role of getaway driver. I know I’m right.”
“Delusional, more like.”
His mouth twitches as he fights a smile. Hyland likes to pretend that he’s all terrifying and aggressive with his insane height and stacked muscles, but I can see beyond that.
I worried him.
Because… what? He cares now?
Fuck if I know.
Looking out the window, I watch the dizzying heights of Canary Wharf rise above us. Beyond being the beating heart of London’s business district, this canal-side suburb boasts multimillion-pound apartment buildings, endless cocktail bars and high-end restaurants.
At the feel of my phone vibrating, I quickly check my messages. I was half-tempted to leave it behind, knowing that the guys are tracking me. Seeing as I’m with Hyland anyway, it felt pointless.
Unknown number: I want a rematch, sweetheart.
Unknown number: If you still want those answers.
Lungs sputtering, I quickly shove my phone back into my pocket. Blaine bloody Madden is the whole reason I’m in this mess. As much as I want to, I can’t think about him or his fascinatingly scarred body right now.
When Hyland indicates right to pull into one of the huge apartment buildings’ parking garages, tapping a code into the keypad so the barrier will rise, realisation hits.
“Wait. You live here?”
“Don’t sound so surprised.”
“I guess I am.”
“Warner, Axel and I share a penthouse apartment here. We moved in a few years ago.”
I know Sabre pays my brother’s firm a small fortune for his legal jiu-jitsu, but I hadn’t stopped to consider how the Anaconda Team has risen through the ranks too. They’re top dogs now.
“How come I’m getting a magical mystery tour?” I joke dryly.
Hyland swings his SUV into a parking spot. “Team meeting.”
“And I get an invite?”
Casting me a look, he doesn’t answer.
Huh.
I climb out of the SUV, adjusting my blue jeans and tee. Tom turned his nose up at the big rip in the right knee this morning. While he’s mad at me, he still found time to insult my style in typical brotherly fashion.
After fiddling with his sandy-coloured man bun, Hyland shoves a few loose tendrils behind his ears as we head inside. The doorman stands to attention when he sees us coming, the pair exchanging nods.
“One of yours?” I mutter.
“Yeah. James is on our pay roll.”
He steers us over towards the elevators, glistening beneath modern glass chandeliers that illuminate the marble floors. Hell, this place is grand. It feels like some luxurious five-star retreat.
“We have 24/7 security, Ember. This line of work paints a target on your back.”
“Speaking from personal experience?”
Hyland jabs the button for the penthouse. “Something like that.”
The doors click shut, sealing us in the tight space. I’m drumming up another line of conversation to get him talking to me when Hyland abruptly spins around, barging into my space.
“Woah!”
I’m backed up by his intimidating frame until my spine presses against the mirrored wall. His hands land on either side of my head, bracing him in a dominant position while his scowling face leans in close.
The rapid shift makes my head spin. I’m caged by his oversized frame, locked in a steely prison of muscles and golden skin.
“What the fuck were you thinking?”
“Now you want to talk?” I crane my neck to see into his mossy pools. “We had a whole car ride to hash this out.”
“I’m in charge of your security! You made me look like a complete fool.”
“Oh, shucks. Did I embarrass you?”
“This isn’t a joke,” he hisses back.
“No, it’s not! And I’m not your prisoner. This isn’t protection. It’s a fucking insult. I’m more than capable of looking after myself.”
“That really helped last time someone took you!” Hyland throws the accusation like it’s a weapon he can use against me.
And his aim is true, causing indignation to flutter in my gut. When I hammer a curled fist against his chest, Hyland doesn’t even flinch. God, I’d love to punch his stupid, handsome face next.
“How dare you,” I snarl at him.
“It’s not a fair observation? You were trafficked.”
“And spent six years being made into a weapon!”
His strong, rugged features are pulled tight in annoyance. I’m going to settle this now before I cave in his skull.
“I was held captive. Starved. Sold.”
“Em—”
“Whipped. Humiliated. Threatened. Beaten almost to the point of death for good measure. I was forced to fucking fight for the right to exist!”
We’re almost nose to nose, his nostrils flaring with each sharp inhale. Warring emotions tangle in his olive eyes—regret, concern, anger, frustration.
Well, fucking same.
“While other women were being distributed to be gang raped, I was trying not to get my spine cracked by a revolving door of thugs looking to make a quick buck.”
“Okay, Em. I get it.”
“No! You don’t!”
Now that the frustrated tsunami is pouring out of me, I can’t stop it. I want him to know exactly why I went to that warehouse in search of answers.
“I almost died once.”
His visible flinch offers a taste of satisfaction.
“I lost plenty of fights,” I continue. “But one nearly took my life from me. My opponent was vicious. He cracked my goddamn skull against the ground, putting me out of action for months.”
The colour drains from Hyland’s face, making his blonde-stubble gleam like shining gold threads against his translucent skin. It only spurs me on further.
“That didn’t stop Gael from putting me back in the ring as soon as I could move again.” I laugh coldly, a phantom pain slicing through my head. “All I could think was that I wished I had died.”
Still deathly silent, Hyland doesn’t respond.
“But something in me just wouldn’t stop fighting to get home. I had to pick myself up and continue fighting every day, earning them even more money.”
“Fuck, Ember…”
“The men who did that to me are still out there. In fact, they’re looking for me at this very second, planning to drag me back to that life. And you want me to sit still?”
“Okay.” His voice is a sorrow-filled plea. “I get it now.”
“No. You don’t get to barge in here, throw your weight around and accuse me of being weak. Not when I’ve fought tooth and nail to be the exact opposite of that ever since I was taken.”
“That’s not what I was doing,” Hyland rushes to assure, shaking his head. “I don’t think you’re weak.”
“But it’s my fault I was taken?”
“No! No. That’s not what I meant.”
“It’s what you said,” I argue hotly.
“It’s not what I meant. I just want to keep you safe.”
“You can’t protect me! Not from this!”
Still braced above me, his eyes are swirling with panic. It stokes the rage that fuels me even more. I’ll never let anyone talk shit without facing the consequences of their careless words.
“This is a case for you, but for me… this is my life. It’s the life that I couldn’t see a way out of for a very long time. It’s the life I survived.”
“I know.” Throat undulating, his deep tenor swells with emotion. “You deserve credit for that.”
“Then what’s your problem? I went to that warehouse for answers!”
He drops his eyes, breathing raggedly. “I don’t… I’m not…”
“Not what? Capable of admitting I can handle myself?”
“No…”
“Then what?” I press urgently. “Spit it out!”
“Em. Enough.”
“Just tell me! What is your problem?”
“I’m pissed because you put yourself at risk last night!” His hand slaps against the elevator wall beside me. “And I need you to be safe.”
“Because I’m your client? Your burden?”
“Because, you infuriatingly insane woman, I care about you!”
His words bounce around the inside of the elevator as I silently gape at him.
“I care what happens to you, Ember!”
Nope. Still not a word.
“Is that really so hard to believe?” He releases a strangled huff. “I care about protecting you from those traffickers. Clearly, I care too bloody much. As usual.”
The elevator dings when it reaches the top floor, but neither of us move to exit into the corridor. We’re suspended in an impenetrable bubble, the invisible boundary pulsating with anger and tension.
Hyland’s entire body seems to be vibrating. I’m shaking just as badly. Anger and shock collide hard enough in my chest to split the organ into individual atoms, but still, I can’t leave him.
“You want the truth?” He finally breaks the silence.
Throat constricted, I can only nod.
“I think you’re strong.” His baritone softens to a low rumble. “Strong enough to survive horrors I can’t even dream of. You’re powerful. Formidable. So goddamn beautiful, I want to destroy anyone… fucking anyone… who dares to mean you harm.”
My tongue glues to the roof of my mouth.
“You’re a ball buster, and I’ve never been happier to let someone walk all over me.” His mouth crooks in a smile. “The way you storm through life like it’s a mountain to be conquered is so hot, I can’t even begin to tell you.”
When his huge hand lowers to cup my face, I forget how to suck in air. His massive palm is rough and warm, sparking an electric storm inside my veins that threatens to decimate my entire being.
What was my plan here?
Whatever I hoped to achieve, it’s obliterated by pure instinct as I lean into his palm. Anger has distilled into a concentrated shot of longing. For his touch, his harsh words, his gentle declaration. Any and all of it.
I want to take.
I want to feel.
I want everything .
“So why do you treat me like I’m made of glass?”
“Because you survived a living nightmare,” he replies simply. “I don’t want anyone to try to break you ever again.”
“But why? I’m not your responsibility.”
“You’re my client. My assignment.”
“So what?”
“That makes you my responsibility.” He shrugs. “If I have one job in this miserable life, then it’s to protect you from experiencing pain ever again.”
Peering into his expanded pupils, the black point drinking in all light and colour around it, I wait for Hyland to take the next step. Lord knows, I want him to break this stifling tension.
Regardless of our location. Regardless of the kiss I shared with Axel. Regardless of the fact that we’re client and bodyguard. Something is screaming inside me, begging to be released.
And I want him to silence it.
I want him to devour it.
“I didn’t protect someone once before.” His admission comes in a rough rasp. “I failed, and she paid the price.”
“Who?” I ask in a whisper.
He shakes his head, actively dislodging the painful memories. “I was so stupid, Em. My family got hurt because of me. That’s why I’ll never fail anyone again.”
My insides twist at the sight of anguish leaking from his expression. “I’m sorry, but you can’t protect the entire world.”
“Watch me,” Hyland challenges. “I can, and I will.”
Just as a delicious heat begins to pulse between my thighs, he straightens then steps away from me. The space that opens up between us makes me want to pathetically sob and plead.
I must be losing my mind if I’m expecting him to do… What, exactly? I’m his client. His assignment. That’s it. For all his grandiose words, our relationship will always boil down to that dichotomy.
“We’re late.” He clears his thick-sounding throat. “Shouldn’t keep them waiting.”
Unable to speak, I can only summon another uncertain nod. I’m still distracted by thoughts of him pinning me against the wall and destroying my mouth with his tempting lips.
I bet his muscles would fit snugly against mine. I’m hardly short, but compared to him, I have to wonder how I’d take the brunt of his raw desire. Damn me to hell, I want to find out.
“Ember?”
Shaking off the thought, I push away from the wall to follow him out. “Coming.”
Walking out into the plush corridor feels akin to a fever dream after that intense moment. My legs are wobbly and unstable. I mentally berate myself to get a grip as we approach the apartment door on their private floor.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Hyland hesitates, hand wavering over their security system.
“What is this , exactly?”
“You getting what you want.”
My gaze darts between him and the door. Surely not.
“You mean…?”
“It’s not too late to change your mind,” he replies in confirmation. “Once you do this, there’s no turning back.”
Holy shit. It’s happening.
“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Hyland mutters in disbelief. “But you’ll be part of our team. Our… family.”
Surprise sends my stuttering brain into overdrive. After Axel’s suggestion and the total silence that followed, I never thought they’d consider recruiting me. And especially not after last night.
Do I even want this?
Watching Hyland scan his thumbprint to unlock their front door then hold it open for me to step inside, my feet won’t respond. The weight of this decision feels crushing.
All I wanted was to go home.
The woman who built that life died in the ring. She died time and time again until all I was left with is the person I am now. The broken shards of my former existence are scattered across the Mexican desert.
“You can still walk away.” Hyland watches as I internally debate. “Let us investigate. When it’s safe, you can start over.”
“I thought I wanted that.” I lick my suddenly dry lips. “But I don’t care about that life anymore.”
“What do you care about?”
My answer is immediate.
“Justice.”
Feet carrying me forwards without having to think further, I feel my anticipation build. I want the chance to take back my power and fight the monsters who did this to me. I want vengeance.
“Why are you doing this?” I ask over my shoulder.
“Warner thinks you proved yourself last night.” Hyland follows behind me. “And at least this way, I can keep an eye on you. We can train you. Keep you safe.”
“You’re seriously on board with this?”
“On board?” There’s no mirth in his olive-green eyes when he chuckles. “Hell no. Reluctantly agreeing to stop you from taking unbelievably stupid risks, more like.”
“Fuck you.”
Hyland rolls his eyes, stepping over the threshold. “I said you’re strong, red. I meant it. Our team needs a bit of fire right now.”
The nickname rolls over me like a welcome embrace. I find myself smiling at the asshole.
“I can bring that.”
“Of that, I have no doubt.” He looks over me in a slow, sensual perusal. “Why do I feel like I’m going to regret this?”
“Because I’m going to make your life hell, tough guy.”
“Great.” He sighs loudly.
Inside the penthouse, endless lines of polished glass, exposed metal beams and clean lines of grey and muted blue greet me. Bright light spills through 360-degree windows in dazzling beams.
The entryway is huge in itself, divided by a glossy, black bookcase several metres long. My gaze catches on rows of framed photographs, nestled in the shelf’s cubbyholes with other valuables and trinkets.
“Who’s this?” I study a gold-gilded frame.
Hyland stops at my side, the door clicking shut behind him. “That’s my son, Luke. He’s six years old.”
“I had no idea. Why haven’t you mentioned him?”
Hyland deliberates for a moment, his suddenly sad gaze locked on the image of the blonde-haired kid showing off a toothy grin. The heaviness that settles over him is palpable.
“I don’t see him much with my work schedule. My divorce from his mother wasn’t amicable, and she got full custody. They live down south near her parents now.”
“You’re divorced?”
“For a few years.” He shifts uncomfortably on his feet. “Like I said… my family got hurt because of me.”
Cutting off the conversation, Hyland walks farther into the apartment. I follow in his looming shadow, looking back over my shoulder at the sweet little boy one last time.
He looks a lot like his dad, though his wide eyes are a beautiful shade of turquoise-blue, and his features are rounded with youthful innocence. I wonder if he’s the reason Hyland needs to protect the whole world.
Maybe that’s his monster.
He’s forever bound to protect others because he failed those he loved most in the past.
“Hyland? Ember?”
At the sound of Warner calling our names, Hyland halts, gesturing for me to walk ahead. The ceiling rises sharply at the end of the entrance hall to a dramatic, ten-foot expanse supported with huge steel beams.
The penthouse is open plan and boasts a living space that could probably fit my entire old apartment. Sunken floors lead into the impressive lounge, marked by two cream, L-shaped sofas, a stone fireplace and massive flatscreen TV.
In the nearby kitchen, spotlights and concealed beams of muted light illuminate the space, dominated by speckled-black marble counters, multiple barstools and several high-end burners.
I’ve never seen such a grand fridge. It’s one of many top-end appliances, the array of gadgets failing to fill even half of the available counter space. Their ten-seat dining table next to the window is equally large.
“Damn.”
Behind me, Hyland snorts sardonically. “It’s a bit excessive for me too.”
“Are you kidding? This is awesome.”
“Glad you like it.”
The view out of the floor-to-ceiling windows captivates me. London’s vast wealth and urban landscape stretch on for miles like a breathtaking, panoramic painting.
“Over here,” Warner’s voice calls.
At his words, I turn to face him. “Oh, hi.”
The sight of him in navy-blue workout gear stuns me. It isn’t his exposed metal prosthetic peeking out of his shorts that steals my tongue. I’ve seen it enough times since his car accident.
His built shoulders, hair-smattered forearms and strong, bulging biceps are on full-display in the vest he wears. Warner prefers to be comfortable, but I’ve never seen this much of him before. He’s… muscular .
“Hey.” He eyes me warily. “Coffee?”
“Um,” I falter, feeling flustered. “Sure.”
“Coming up.”
Stepping into the kitchen, I drag my fingers over the silky-smooth countertops, trying hard not to gawp. He moves to work an intimidating coffee machine that I’m longing to drool over next.
“You still take sugar?” Warner asks, keeping his tone neutral.
“Uh, no. Black is fine.”
“Sweet enough as you are?”
“You know it,” I reply sarcastically.
Wincing at the awkward silence while he fixes my coffee, I search for the right words. I feel far guiltier for scaring Warner than anyone else. He risked himself to come after me, diving straight into enemy territory.
After all this time, he’s still loyal to a fault. That sweet boy who played secret agents and astronauts with me grew into a devoted man who would do anything for those he cares about. Then I went ahead and scared the shit out of him.
“Look,” I eventually break the silence. “While I’m not sorry for attempting to communicate with Blaine, I am sorry that I worried you. It was unfair and careless.”
Palm braced on the counter, he slides my coffee over to me. “Worried me?”
“Erm… terrified you? Made you prematurely age? Dragged you into the middle of nowhere to rescue me? Shall I list more?”
“Sure. Keep going.”
I fight a smile. “Nah, I think you get the picture.”
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Warner drags in a breath. “I don’t know whether to yell at you for taking such a risk or thank you for trying to corner Blaine.”
“I’ll be here when you figure it out.” I gratefully accept the steaming mug then sip. “Take your time.”
“You’re a pain in my ass.”
“But you still love me, right?”
Warner shakes his head in mock-outrage. “Damn you, Em.”
Rounding the corner, he yanks me into a hard, fast hug. Luckily, I’ve placed the coffee back down so I don’t end up spilling the steaming liquid all over him.
Since we reach the same height, I can tuck my face into his collarbone. A fragrant forest welcomes me, the invisible arms of an ever-present woodland pulling me into its safety.
“Don’t scare me like that again.”
“Sorry?” I hedge.
“You’re not. So don’t lie.”
While Warner’s familiar heat steadies me, it also soothes the constant undercurrent of fear and anxiety that I’ve been keeping buried. Luckily for me, he doesn’t need to know how scared I am to show me compassion.
“I have enough grey hairs without you making things worse,” he mumbles against my hair. “That’s why you’re going to train with us.”
My head lifts so I can peer into his bottomless baby blues. “Are you serious?”
“I want to destroy the business model that allows people like you to get hurt. What do you want?”
“The same.”
His frame vibrates with a long exhale. “Then help me do it.”
When he tucks an auburn strand behind my ear, I feel my entire body clench in a way it never has around him before. Not with Warner. The unexpected sizzle of tension is immediate and intense.
His fingers brush the outer edge of my earlobe then move to trace my cheek. With each subtle stroke, fiery pinpricks explode in their wake.
“If keeping you safe means teaching you to use all that fighting power… then so be it.” He seems to catch himself, quickly lowering his hand. “That’s what we’ll do.”
“You mean it?”
Certainty brightens his crystalline eyes. “Come work for me. No one will ever dare touch you again.”
“It’s not me I’m worried about,” I rush to explain. “I want to prevent more women and girls from getting hurt. And… Well, I want to do something to fix this feeling inside me.”
“What feeling, Em?”
My chest spasms, tightening into a vice.
“This feeling like I want to hurt the whole world.”
Despite sensing Hyland’s presence in the kitchen behind us, I’m entrapped by Warner’s accepting stare. The glimmering, aquamarine ocean appraising me with nothing but concern and care.
A vulnerable part of me wants to dive deep into those calming waves and never resurface. I want to sink into his gaze and surrender my breath for the chance to rest there. Even if only for a second.
“I can’t undo what’s been done, Em.” His forehead creases with deep grooves. “But I can give you the chance to seek justice.”
“Please. That’s all I want.”
“Then join our team. Train. Learn. Let us protect you. In return, we can hunt down the motherfuckers who hurt you… together.”
Footsteps approach then a familiar scarred hand touches my shoulder. With Warner still holding my waist and Hyland’s heat at my back, I’m overwhelmed by them. Their scents. Their promises. The unexpected salvation they’re offering.
“I want to fight these fuckers,” I whisper after gulping. “I want to find Gracie. Gael has to pay for what he’s done.”
“He will.” Warner summons a small smile, his head shaking slowly. “I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this.”
“Agreeing to what?”
If Axel’s high-pitched, singsong voice didn’t announce his arrival, then his loud footsteps would. Warner hastily steps away from me, though Hyland’s paw remains locked on my shoulder.
Axel bounces into the kitchen, an open laptop in hand. “I am never pulling an all-nighter with the intelligence team again. Bunch of boring nerds with zero sense of humour.”
“Then I suggest you stop breaking the team rules,” Warner quips in response. “Thought you would’ve learned after the target practice incident.”
“Didn’t realise working for Sabre fucking Security would come with so many rules.” He deposits the laptop on the counter then moves to the coffee maker. “I hate you guys.”
With an eye roll, Warner rounds the marble slab to take a barstool. His hand automatically drops to his right thigh, massaging where his leg ends and the metal prosthetic begins.
“Well? What did I miss?” Axel looks over his shoulder.
The feeling that gathers in the pit of my belly is equal parts certainty and determination. It steadies my bones and offers me the first pulse of relief since I made that fateful phone call.
“I guess… I’m joining the Anaconda Team.”