Chapter 15
Bo
I’m in bed alone.
My eyes are shut but I can feel it. It’s like this empty hollowness has filled the room, and I don’t want to open my eyes and confirm what I already know.
I still can’t believe yesterday happened, and I have no idea what it means.
I have no idea what came over me or Cam.
After one the greatest orgasms I've ever had we watched a couple movies in awkward silence. I don't know what's happening.
What I do know is that he may not be attracted to other men, but he was more than turned on last night.
Is it because we’re so close? I don’t know.
Why now? That’s the question, why now? I’ve loved him for as long as I can remember, but never has he even hinted of teetering on the queer balance beam.
Even as I fell asleep in his arms last night, I knew it wouldn’t last. It was hard to fully enjoy the warmth of him wrapped around me.
Daring to open my eyes, my thoughts are sadly confirmed as I stare at Cam’s side of the bed.
Reaching out my hand, I feel the sheets.
Surprisingly they’re still warm. Maybe he didn’t spring out of bed early to freak out, then.
I guess it’s time to face this.
I get up to pee then brush my teeth, and I breathe in the humid cloud of Cam’s bodywash. So maybe he hasn’t been up for too long. I know he’s going to freak out, and I’m trying so hard to build up my armor and protect myself from the hurt I know is coming. I just hope we can get past this.
Last night was . . . a lot. I brace against the sink letting the memories flood me. I want to relive them and keep them, even if it hurts.
They’re all I’ll have left when he inevitably tells me it was a mistake again. Mentally, I’m too tired to care or think to much on it. Whatever’s going to happen will happen, and I just want to enjoy how it felt to be his.
Even if it was only for a few hours.
The way he looked at me, his eyes dripping with desire as he watched me. I’ve never had someone look at me like that. He came watching me come, and I will never forget the hooded gaze of his honey eyes as they locked onto me in his arms. It’s like he wouldn’t dare look anywhere else.
I will never forget it.
My dick starts to chub up, and I squeeze it hard. “I’ve had enough of your bullshit! You’re going to embarrass me.”
“Why are you strangling your dick?” I flinch, seeing Cam standing in my bedroom.
“Uh . . .” I look around. My lungs tighten.
Drop. It! I let my dick go, taking a breath to still my beating nerves.
My heart is racing. Shit. It’s hard to take a full breath.
I hold my finger up, walking to my nightstand and taking a puff of my inhaler.
“Just a sec.” I sit down and close my eyes, trying to focus.
Just easy. Take it easy. Everything is fine. It’s fine.
I slowly open them to Cam standing right beside me.
“You okay?”
“Yeah. I’m fine. Just scared me is all.” When my breathing becomes easier I get up, going to the mirror and making sure my hair isn’t sticking up everywhere.
Smoothing it down, I jump a little when Cam comes up behind me.
I try to focus on my reflection and not the six-foot pain in my ass behind me.
I look tired. And mentally I am. I’m still wearing Cam’s shirt, which I’d slipped on last night after I showered.
Which reminds me. “Fuck.”
“What?”
I hold the shirt down, making sure it covers everything.
“What?” He smirks. “What are you hiding from me?”
I can’t help myself, and I don’t know who this man is and what he’s done with my goofy best friend. I would really like him back. It was hard to resist him before, but this feral man is nearly impossible not to give in to.
The gleam in his golden eyes terrifies me as much as it excites me. He backs me up to my dresser, and I’m barely breathing. “What have you got for me under there?”
Who is this person!
“N-nothing.”
“Nothing?” He cocks his head, voice lowering. “I know that can’t be true.” My ass hits my dresser. With one arm he scoops me up, placing me on top of it. “Tell me to stop,” he whispers, leaning in and kissing the corner of my mouth. “Why can’t I help myself when it comes to you?”
My hands reply, holding on to his biceps. “You’re asking the wrong person.” I moan as Cam’s knees part my legs and he steps into the hollow of my thighs. “Don’t stop.” I’m not sure what’s happening, but I know I need more of it.
Cradling my skull with one hand, his other squeezes my thigh, tugging my ass to the edge. “What are you wearing down there?”
His breath is warm against my neck. “Nothing,” I somehow choke out.
He lifts one of my knees, placing my foot on the edge of the dresser, then does the same with the other.
He can see how much nothing I’m wearing right now as his shirt slides up my hips.
He looks down, his eyes heating on me. “Beautiful nothing.” He tsks.
“Look how hard you are. Do you want to come? Was last night not enough?” His warm breath hits my ear before he takes the lobe between his teeth. “Do you need to come?”
“Y-yes.”
“Stroke your cock for me.” I listen, wrapping my fist around my dick and stroking. I’m not sure what he’s going to do when he shoves his middle and ring fingers into his mouth, sucking the digits together. “You want it? You want my fingers, Bo?”
“Y-yeah please. Please, Cam.” His fingers smooth up my crack before probing against my hole.
“Has this tight hole had enough?" His fingers push in a little. Just a tease. It sets my blood on fire. "Or can it take more?”
“More. Always more.” Holy shit, is he going to fuck me? I don’t know if I can do it like this, or even handle that right now. Luckily I don’t have more time to think as he sinks both fingers in slowly, my body clenching against them as they slide deeper. “Holy shit.”
“Yeah? You okay, Bo?” My eyes pinch shut.
I nod. He begins to move them, thrusting slowly, rubbing the pads of his fingers along my walls.
I jolt each time he slides deep inside me.
“Are you dripping?” I look down, and precum beads at my slit.
His thumb begins to rub my perineum, my hand sloppy as I stroke myself.
I squeeze my tip, not wanting to come so quick, but it’s useless.
My thighs shake; I’m right there. How can I not be?
The sweet pressure of him inside me is messing with my head.
“Cam. More.”
“More?” Biting my lip, I nod. “Fuck yeah, Bo. Ride my fingers,” he whispers.
“Look at you. So sweet and desperate, huh? You want to feel good? Make yourself feel good. Ride me.” His fingers slide deeper and he wiggles them around inside me sending electric shocks to my balls. I pump harder. I’m so close. “Come on.”
“Camden, so close . . . so good. So—” His lips slam onto mine as I start to moan, come spilling over my fist. His fingers move faster, letting me ride them through every wave. His tongue plunges into my mouth, making me groan louder. I don’t know how long it is until he pulls out, leaving me empty.
I hear the water running while I try to catch my breath.
Smoothing his shirt out, I slide off the dresser, grabbing a pair of briefs and sliding them on.
I think about the bag of lingerie I bought and change my mind, finding the new jock I bought in the hamper and changing into that instead. “Fuck.”
I turn, seeing Cam standing in the doorway. I have his long shirt pulled up so I can look at my jock in the mirror, and his eyes heat on my skin. “How good is your recovery time?”
“Wha—why?”
He pushes away from the doorway and stalks toward me. “Because I just might want to see how many times this gorgeous pussy can come.” He grabs a handful of my ass, kissing the back of my neck. What has come over him? Am I still asleep?
Kissing the back of my neck one more time, he lets me go.
“I made breakfast.”
I don’t let myself think to much on it, finding a pair of jeans and slipping on a shirt that actually fits me and is not covered in cum. Grabbing my hoodie, I pull it over my head. I don’t want to get my hopes up. Part of me knows how this is going to go.
Hope is mean. I try my best not to be filled with it.
Walking into my living room, I smell muffins. It smells like the cinnamon coffee muffins he likes to make, which may mean that Cam was stress baking. Was he freaking out earlier? That doesn’t explain what just happened?
I sit on a bar stool, looking at the spread.
It’s funny to me that he can bake the most insane things, yet he can’t make his smoothies right.
Cam comes back into the room. “The ones on the left are banana ones.” I take a muffin, nearly groaning at the sweet sugary taste of it.
That’s one more thing I love about him. He’s super into health and fitness, but he doesn’t sacrifice food for the sake of it.
Everything is balance. There’s no such thing as a guilty pleasure.
There’s nothing guilty about eating. He’s always making new things for me to try with my diet restrictions.
I know it’s one of the reasons he’s so requested at the gym—that and he’s kind. He actually cares about the progress his clients are making, and at the end of the day he just wants them to feel good. To him, the outside is superficial and pointless. It’s how you feel inside that counts.
And right now my insides are feeling fantastic.
“Good?”
I look up, nodding. “Always.” The awkwardness is starting to seep in. I can’t believe he just did what he did. If it wasn’t for the soft ache in my ass, I might believe I was still asleep. “What’s the spice?”
“Cayenne. Just a little.”
“Yup.” I can’t meet his eyes. We both eat quietly, but I feel Cam’s eyes on me.
He’s wearing dark jeans and a black Dragon Ball T-shirt with Goku going super Saiyan on the front of it.
Everything is making me uneasy. I need to stop, I know I do.
I’m living out a fantasy I’ve had ever since I first learned what sex even was.