Chapter 15 #2
“Yes! Mom and Abigail made an awesome picnic basket with all our favorite things. We spent most of the day at the beach, and Ethan, just to annoy me, put me on his shoulders and threw me into the water. I ended up liking it, though.”
She pauses, then adds softly, “I really wish you could’ve come, Daddy. We had a really good time.”
As Alicia rambles on about her day with her mother and Ethan, a genuine smile reaches my face. I love my little girl more than I can articulate.
“Is your brother around?” I ask during a lull.
“He’s in the shower,” she says. “We’re roasting s’mores after dinner, just like you like to do when we come here. Oh—Mom’s out of the shower. I love you, Daddy!”
“I love you very much, my little princess.”
My breath hitches as I wait for the hand-off.
"Colin," she says. Not 'Hi, love.' Not 'Hi, baby.' Just my name.
I clench my teeth. "Ceci, why did you take the kids without saying anything?"
She sighs, and I can picture the exact look of weary patience on her face. "I sent you a text telling you."
"A text, Ceci? Not even a call?"
"I already knew you wouldn't answer. Not when you're focused on your contracts. I just wanted to make sure you knew where we were."
I bite back the retort that she could have called the office. I run a hand over my forehead, the knot in my throat tightening. "We talked about this yesterday. I said I was making time. I was going to leave work early today so we could go to Prospect Park."
"Oh..."
That’s it? A hollow 'oh'?
The silence stretches, heavy and uncomfortable. "Colin, it’s their last week before school starts," she says finally. "I promised them the whole summer. We talked about this several times."
I lean my head against the wall and close my eyes. The feeling of failing her isn't new, but this time, it feels like a physical blow. "I could come over tonight? We could drive back together tomorrow," I offer, the hope evident in my tone.
She shuts it down without a second thought. "There’s no need. You must be tired after working all day. Why spend two hours on the road? We’ll be back Monday morning, in time for Ethan’s birthday cake."
She doesn't want me there. She’s moved on with her weekend, and I’m not part of the plan.
I feel the weight of a gaze on me and open my eyes. Maya is standing at the end of the hallway, watching. I give her a flat, warning look that warns her to stay silent.
"Fine. Have it your way," I say, my voice coming out harsher than I intended. My heart is aching, Ceci has never frozen me out like this. "I love you," I add, letting the longing bleed through.
"Me too. We'll talk later."
She hangs up.
Maya approaches the second the call ends, telling me the food is ready. I sit at the table and let her serve me. I can’t even taste the food past the obstruction in my throat, but I go through the motions, thanking her and offering a compliment.
Maya tries to keep a conversation going, drifting through office gossip and asking about the contracts I supposedly spent the day on. As we finish, she leans in. "Did your family travel? Sorry, I overheard part of the call."
"Yes," I say, my tone clipped and dry.
She bites her lip, sensing the opening. "You could sleep here tonight."
I look at her, and my mind drifts to the silent, empty house—the cold side of my bed waiting for me in Brooklyn.
"Alright," I say, nodding.
She beams, leaning over to give me a quick kiss as she starts clearing the table. I watch her load the dishwasher, but my mind drifts back to my conversation with Ceci, replaying on a loop.
That’s when it hits me.
She didn’t say she loved me. She just said, “me too.”
Maya
I wake up with my face pressed against Colin’s chest, and the feeling pulls an unguarded smile from my lips. I’ve spent so many nights wishing for this, missing the simple comfort of curling into his arms after he falls asleep.
I catch myself hoping that soon it won’t always be me reaching for him. I want him to be the one who draws me in, who pulls me against his chest before we drift off.
From the moment he arrived yesterday, I knew something was off.
He was distracted, a silent storm simmering just beneath the surface.
Even after we had sex in the living room, he remained impenetrable, his mind clearly miles away.
It wasn't until I overheard his phone conversation that everything clicked. So, his family is gone. It’s a shame they’re only away for the weekend, but I’ll take what I can get.
I let him have his way with me last night—fucking me in every way possible, letting him use me to bleed off whatever frustration had been building inside him. When he finally slipped into an exhausted sleep not long after, I felt on top of the world.
I did that. I’m the one who gives him the release he needs. I’m the one who can make him forget.
Trying not to disturb him, I quietly get out of bed. I head to the guest bathroom to take a shower, leaving him to sleep a little longer in the silence of my room.
I’m finishing the table when Colin walks into the kitchen.
After my shower, I’d slipped out to the bakery downstairs to grab the specific breads and pastries I remember him eating back at the hotel in Miami.
I set the bowl of chopped fruit down and go to him, standing on my tiptoes to press a kiss to his mouth.
"Good morning," I say, unable to keep the smile off my face.
"Good morning."
His voice is level, but then I notice he’s already back in the clothes he arrived in yesterday, and I frown.
We sit down to eat, and I find myself watching him the entire time.
It could always be like this. The two of us, sharing coffee in the silence of the morning after a night of intense, earth-shattering sex.
"Do you have plans for today?" I ask, an idea starting to take root.
He watches me impassively. "Why?"
“It’s the wedding anniversary of the aunt and uncle who raised me this weekend,” I say, my voice softening. “I was thinking of stopping by a winery not far from here to pick out something special for them.”
I look at him from beneath my lashes, letting the invitation linger. “You know so much more about wine than I do. I thought you might come with me and help me choose.”
He frowns. "You were raised by your aunt and uncle? What happened to your parents?"
"They passed away," I answer simply, keeping my expression neutral. "My mother died a little over a year after my dad. People say it was from a broken heart."
"You never mentioned that."
"You never asked," I retort, a small edge to my voice. "I don't know anything about your parents, either."
He shrugs the comment off and stands up. "I can't go with you. I can give you some recommendations if you’d like, but I’m going to the office to get a few things done."
Disappointment clenches in my stomach like a fist. I stand quickly, following him into the living room as he pulls on his jacket and gathers his things from the couch. "I can go with you," I offer. "I can help."
"I'll see you tomorrow at the office," he says. It’s a dismissal. He barely grazes my lips with a kiss before he’s out the door, leaving my apartment as quickly as he can.
I stand there in the silence he left behind.
You can keep running, Colin, but you always come back.
Colin
I’m stopped at a red light just after leaving Maya’s building when Ceci sends me photos and two short videos. Alicia is practicing ballet movements in the sand, and Ethan is chasing after her after she’s pushed him into the water, clothes and all.
I find myself laughing alone in the car.
I should’ve been there with them. But Ceci didn’t want me there. That’s a bitter pill to swallow.
I get to Montgomery Clifford a little before ten.
As soon as I’m in my office, I call Ceci. We talk for a few minutes. Alicia jumps in with her usual cheerful hello, but Ethan isn’t around—or at least, that’s what Ceci says.
As soon as we hang up, I throw myself into work for the rest of the day.
I get home early in the evening, and silence greets me. I order dinner and wait for Ceci to call. The last time we spoke, she said she’d video call later.
A little after eight, my phone rings. I answer, and Alicia’s face fills the screen, smiling.
“Hey, Daddy. Today was really great,” she says, smiling.
I smile back. “Yeah? Tell me about it, princess.”
I recognize the background immediately, the kitchen at the Hamptons house. She starts talking about her day from the moment she woke up, moving easily from one detail to the next, until something she mentions makes my chest tighten.
“What were you saying about a fish?” I ask, keeping my tone light.
She laughs. “Oh. Mommy’s friend brought us a fish today. It was huge. Ethan said it was bigger than my head.”
“Mommy’s friend?”
“Yeah,” she says, like it’s obvious. “He was nice. And he has a dog—a golden retriever. His name’s Sam.”
Her voice stays easy, unaware, while the sound of blood rushing in my ears grows louder.
Is that why she didn’t want me there yesterday? Why she brushed me off so quickly?
“Alicia, is your mom around?” I ask, forcing my voice to stay calm.
“Yeah, she’s right here,” she says. “Hold on.”
She pulls the phone away, then hands it over. Ceci’s face appears on the screen. She smiles at me, but it isn’t one of those smiles meant just for me.
I don’t waste a second.
“Who’s this friend Alicia was talking about?”