Chapter 24 #2
There’s a tug-of-war happening between my heart and my brain, and it’s not letting me think clearly. The words I ache to say get stuck because saying them out loud feels too selfish. I don’t know if I can give her what she’s looking for. If I’m brave enough to admit what I’m looking for myself.
Ivy scoots closer, her other hand sliding into mine until I’m cocooned by her warmth. Her presence soothes and tortures me all at once.
“I spent the entire night worrying about you,” she confesses quietly.
“Nash wasn’t texting me any updates, so I kept telling myself you were fine.
No news is good news, right? But I couldn’t—” Her voice catches.
“I had this anxiety inside me that wouldn’t let me breathe.
Even now, with you sitting right here, I can still feel it.
I was so scared to lose you, Ford. I couldn’t stand it. ”
“You’re not going to lose me. I’m not going anywhere.”
“You can’t promise me that.”
I lift a hand to her face, cradling her cheek in my palm. Her skin is warm against my cold fingers, her breath brushing my wrist.
“When that wall was about to collapse on us, all I could think about was how badly I wanted to come home to you. To hold you. To know you’re okay, even though I was the one in danger.”
Her breath hitches. “Ford….”
“I don’t know what’s happening to me. This thing between us, we said it could only happen once, but—”
Ivy closes the space between our lips. A low, relieved sigh escapes her when I kiss her back, and she melts into me as I pull her into my lap with the kind of desperation that’s been coiled tight for far too long.
My hands find her hips, fingers flexing, needing the solid reassurance that she’s here and she’s mine. She tastes like toothpaste and something else—something so inherently her that leaves me wanting more every time. I’ve been craving her since the moment I met her, and I didn’t even know it.
When she breaks the kiss, I almost whimper. Then she starts to slide off my lap, and that ache sharpens.
“Where are you going?” I don’t care if I look and sound like a clingy bastard right now. I need her more than I’ve ever needed anyone before, in more ways than one.
Wordlessly, she falls to her knees in front of me, making me lose whatever little restraint I had left.
“You’ve had a very long night,” she drawls as she caresses both of my thighs, her hands climbing up and down the fabric of my sweats. Her eyes glimmer with heat and anticipation, and I know I’m in trouble. “I want to take care of you.”
“You don’t have to do this,” I grit out, my hands turning to fists at my sides. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”
“But I really want to do this.” She runs her nails along my thighs, her eyes on me. “One time wasn’t enough for me either.”
A jolt of electricity travels to my cock, but I can’t ignore the pressure in my chest. She only wants to continue with the physical stuff between us, and for some damn reason, it’s getting to me.
I could stop her. I could confess that my feelings for her run deeper than that, that I’m not just looking for a quick fuck. That I want more.
Enter the logical part of my brain. I’m too jaded, and she doesn’t need to deal with anyone else’s shit.
If she’s looking for release and comfort with no strings attached, it might not be what I want, but I will gladly be that for her.
After all, keeping things casual was my idea. I suggested it first.
And aren’t I such a fucking idiot for that?
Her mouth pressing against my thigh brings me back to the present moment, and I shut my eyes, grunting with impatience.
“You like my mouth on you?” she asks in an unexpectedly sultry voice that makes my hips buck.
“You’re a fucking tease,” I grit out. “And I like it way too much.”
Her grin widens. “Sit back and let me put my mouth on you.”
Fuuuuuuck.
Gripping her hair, I say, “Do whatever you want to me. I’m yours.”
She licks those plush lips and, at a punishing slow pace, slides her fingers all the way up my lap until she’s palming the hard outline of my cock.
I throw my head back when she grabs it through the fabric, squeezing me.
And because I was never meant to survive this woman, she presses her lips to my covered bulge. My grip on her hair tightens.
“You’re always doing all these nice things for me,” she says as she strokes my length in a slow, painful rhythm. “Always taking care of me and everyone else. But who takes care of you?”
I can’t speak. I can’t physically utter a single sound.
She grabs the waistbands of both my sweatpants and my underwear and pulls them down my legs until my cock springs free. It about sends me into a spiral when she licks her lips, her eyes on my length.
And when she wraps her hand around my naked hardness, I lose it.
“Baby…,” I grunt, my hips bucking, desperate for friction.
“I need you so badly, Ford,” she whispers before finally sucking me into her mouth.
The warm tightness of her throat nearly tips me over the edge. I still under her, careful as I keep her in place by the hair wrapped around my fist.
“Don’t move,” I grit out. “I need a moment.”
The sound of her laughter reverberates around my dick, sending a jolt of pleasure down to the base. Goddamn it, why can’t I control myself?
Taking a few deep breaths, I slowly sit back against the couch with a pained grunt. Ivy’s mouth makes a popping sound when she lets go.
“You okay?” she teases, a smirk stretching her lips.
“I’m in fucking heaven,” I breathe out. “But I was two seconds away from coming, and that would’ve been no fun.”
She smirks. “You’re right. I’ve been waiting far too long to suck you off. Ten seconds wouldn’t have done it.”
“Oh, yeah?” I tug her head down onto my lap again. “Then suck it, sweetheart. I want to see you choke on it, if you’re so eager.”
Seeing her on her knees before me, pleasuring me, beats all my wildest fantasies. Nothing compares to the real thing, to the feeling of her mouth on my most sensitive part or the sounds she makes.
My mind empties out until she’s filling every corner. I forget about the fire, the stress, the fact that what we have is thrilling but uncertain. I can’t get enough of her.
She presses her tongue to my base, and my hips buck again of their own accord, making her gag. And despite my previous claims of wanting to see her choke, I check that she’s okay.
Her only answer is a smirk before she takes me again.
If her mouth feels this damn good, I can only imagine what it would feel like to sink myself into another, tighter part of her. It’s that thought that snaps the very last of my restraint.
“Stop now unless you want me to come in your mouth,” I warn her.
I should’ve known she wouldn’t stop.
She sucks me harder, faster, deeper—so much so that I have to tighten my grip on her hair to anchor myself to something tangible. My whole fucking body is floating.
With one last buck of my hips, my warmth spills down her throat. The realization that I’m marking her in this primal way sends a bolt of pride straight to my chest.
Mine. She’s mine.
Ten seconds or ten minutes could have passed before my cock starts softening in her mouth, and she lets go with a pop. And then the heathen goes and kills me some more when I focus enough to see her licking her lips after she’s swallowed.
“Relaxed?” she asks nonchalantly, as if she didn’t just give me the best blow job of my goddamn life.
“You’ve destroyed me,” I breathe out.
“In a good way?”
“In the best way.” I hold out my hand. “Come here.”
It shouldn’t feel so easy, the way she fits into my arms.
“Was I too rough?” I ask her, brushing a strand of hair away from her face.
“Nope. Just how I like it.” She sighs happily. “But I’m thinking twice might not be enough. Third time’s a charm, right?”
“I’m not opposed to continuing this in my bedroom.”
She laughs but untangles herself from my arms. “Tempting, but I promised Joe we would go plane spotting this morning.”
“To film his videos?”
She nods.
“Can I tag along with you?”
She watches me carefully. “You don’t want to rest?”
“I’ll sleep later.” Why do I feel so damn shy all of a sudden? “I want to spend more time with you. If I’m not interrupting your time with your brother, that is.”
Her smile is gentle. “I want to spend more time with you too.”
“Does that mean I’ll get to be Joe’s camera assistant today?”
She laughs, and the sound embeds itself in my heart.