Chapter 8
W e arrived in Charleston at 9 AM, bleary-eyed and exhausted. The last thing we all wanted to do was spend a weekend working; even if it was an all expense paid trip. There wasn’t time for rest, though—the expo started at 10:30 AM sharp so we needed to haul ass and look alive.
Ben had taken one for the team and headed down last night so he could set up our table.
The expo was a two-day event—Friday and Saturday, with an early morning flight home on Sunday. It wasn’t a good sign that it was day one and I was already tired; running on three hours of sleep and not a hell of a lot more.
Networking wasn't my forte, and sales was the last thing I wanted to do, so I didn't envy Carly and Ben having to work the crowd and chat up suppliers. All I had to do was take photos, shake hands, and put names to faces of suppliers we had long-standing relationships with. Still, it was a long day of standing around and having to mill in and out of crowds.
The expo ended at three, and since it was still early, Carly, Ben, Mike, and I agreed to meet up at the hotel bar for a drink. Even though I wanted to face-plant onto my hotel bed, a cold beer or two was exactly what I needed after a long day of work.
I sat quietly, picking at my beer label while Carly and Ben regaled us with stories about their day. Carly had met with a new supplier and lined up a meeting to talk shop and numbers with them. Ben’s day had also been successful, going by the amount of business cards he’d given out and collected. Whether they would convert into new suppliers remained to be seen. I let Mike recount how our day went, my social energy depleted. Or maybe I just didn’t care.
My mind was elsewhere and the last thing I wanted to talk about was our work day. Even though this was a paid trip, it was still work for me. Boring. Mundane. Even with the drinks and food that would end up on the company's card.
"So, what's everyone up to tonight?" Carly piped in. Her question was to the group, but her blue eyes fixated on me. I shifted uncomfortably.
"Early night for me," I confirmed. My bed had been calling me for hours. "Will probably have dinner before then, though. What about you guys?"
"We're gonna find a few bars. Maybe a club," Ben said, waggling his brows.
I hid a grimace. Clubbing? I couldn't think of anything worse. "Well, you kids have fun," I quipped.
Carly leaned forward, eyes flashing. "Can I join you for dinner?"
There was a subtle exchange between Ben and Mike. It was a brief meeting of the eyes and a raised brow from Ben before they focused back on their drinks. My face blanched at that silent give.
Fuck. What the hell was that? My eyes dropped to Carly who was contently sipping at her cocktail. Surely, they didn't think…they didn’t think anything was going on between Carly and me… did they?
"Why don't you join us for dinner?" I suggested to them, desperate to smooth over any unnecessary suspicions. Carly and I were just friends, but even I knew that having dinner alone with her in a hotel thousands of miles away from my wife wasn’t right.
"Nah," Mike refused. "I'm gonna have a nap; then we'll grab something quick in my room before heading out."
"So shall we meet in the restaurant at, say, 7?" Carly pushed.
Fuck.
It was too late to change my plans; I'd already announced to the table that I was going out for dinner. Carly would be embarrassed if I refused. Plus, not having dinner with her felt like I was admitting that something more…dangerous was happening. Nothing was going on.
I swallowed the remains of my drink, the liquid sitting heavy in my stomach. "Sure."
I quickly made my excuses and disappeared to my room. Since I'd left home so early this morning, I didn't get to say a proper goodbye to Frankie. I missed her. It was so hard getting out of bed this morning; so hard to leave her warmth when there were so many things unresolved between us. The desire to pull her into my arms and tell her how sorry I was overwhelmed me. Instead, like a coward, I kissed her flushed cheek before quietly leaving.
"Hey, how's the expo?" My hand tightened at the sound of her sweet voice.
"Tiring. I got most of the photos done today. We'll see what tomorrow brings."
"That's good. What are you up to now?"
I rubbed at the ache between my eyes. "Gonna head out to dinner, then hit the sack. It's been a long day."
"Who are you going to dinner with?"
My brow furrowed at her question. Even though it was a perfectly innocent query, I could feel its heavy implication. Tiredness gave way to annoyance. What Frankie really wanted to ask was whether Carly was on this trip. Despite my rebuffs at her constant pushing, I knew her suspicions were never satisfied.
But she is here. And you are lying.
"Just me. Everyone else is going out and hitting bars, but I'm not in the mood for that."
"Okay."
I rubbed at a spot close to my heart. Shame and guilt crushed me at misleading Frankie. But what my wife didn't know wouldn't hurt her.
"I'm gonna meet Nellie for dinner. I'll let you go so you can rest a bit before you eat."
My eyes closed, hot moisture threatening to leak. My wife. She was so sweet. I didn't deserve her. "Frankie…Frankie, I love you." So much.
"I love you, too. Will you call me before you go to bed?"
"Yeah, I should be in around 9 PM, 10 at the latest," I promised.
When I arrived at the restaurant, Carly was already waiting. Her face lit up when she spotted me, throwing a little wave my way. As I strolled closer, my gaze caught her full profile and I almost tripped over my own feet at the sight of her tight, red dress. It was way over the top for a casual dinner between co-workers at a three-star hotel restaurant. I kept my eyes averted from her exposed chest. This was a mistake.
"Hey, you," she greeted. She went to stand, so I quickly sat before she initiated some type of physical contact.
"Hey. Were you waiting long?"
"Nope! Just got here. I took the liberty to order you your usual beer."
My smile strained against my face. "Thanks. I'm sorry I'm a little late. I was just chatting to my wife."
Even though we’d ended our call an hour and a half ago, I still felt the need to establish a barrier with Carly.
Her red mouth curved slightly before she brought her drink to her lips and sucked through the straw. I focused on perusing the menu.
"So, how long have you and Frankie been together again?"
I closed my menu, deciding to settle for a cheeseburger and fries. "A little over twelve years."
"Wow," she whistled. "That's a really long time."
Was it? It didn't feel long to me.
"So, no kids?"
Fucking hell, why did everyone ask that? Just because a couple were married or together for a long time didn’t mean they automatically had to have children.
Carly must've sensed my irritation because she immediately raised her hands. "Sorry, did I hit a sore spot? I shouldn't have asked."
Her face reddened, and I instantly felt like a jerk. "No, no. It's okay,” I sighed.
Maybe it was because Carly didn't know us as a couple; didn't know Frankie. Or perhaps I just needed someone to vent with. Sene was my closest friend but I already knew what his advice would be: get your head on straight, dude. He’d encourage me to talk with Frankie, and he’d keep nagging at me until I did. I didn’t need two people in my life constantly on my case.
"Frankie wants kids, but…" my voice trailed off.
"And you don't."
The waitress stopped by then to take our orders. I could've cut our conversation then and there. The interruption had given me the perfect out. That's what I should've done. Instead, I picked it back up again.
"I've never been a kid person," I finally admitted out loud. "Never had that desire."
"Ugh, me too!" Carly exclaimed, rolling her eyes. "Every time someone comes back from maternity leave and brings their baby in, I'm like, why?"
I snorted at her outburst because I felt the same. Kids didn't belong in the workplace.
"So tell her you don't want children." Carly offered, as if it were that easy. "Is that not something you talked about before you got married?"
Instead of giving her a straight answer, I shrugged. "I thought my opinion would change."
She shook her head. "This is why you don't marry young." She waved her straw at me. "No offense."
My eyes dropped at her comment, and my stomach pitched forward. What she said was wrong. I didn't regret meeting and marrying Frankie young. I'd never bitched about anything in my marriage before, except for joking gripes with Sene about Frankie nagging me on my messiness.
As soon as Carly went in on our marital choices, I knew I shouldn't have said anything. Instead of responding, I swiftly changed the subject. Carly wisely realized that the subject of my marriage was firmly closed, so she moved on to the latest office gossip. I listened with half an ear, but as the minutes ticked on, and another drink was slid in front of me without my knowledge, I slowly started to relax.
My earlier faux pax forgotten, I started to enjoy listening to Carly's story about who was dating who. I had no idea who these people were and, frankly, didn't care, but it was nice to just be around someone fun with no questions or nagging expectations.
When Carly suggested we move to the bar lounge for a few more drinks after dinner, I found myself agreeing. My earlier tiredness had vanished and I could feel myself getting a little tipsy. At first, the conversation was friendly; we sat apart and talked about nothing in particular. But when Carly returned from the bathroom and retook her seat, I soon realized that she’d moved closer to me on the couch.
Her words became a little too flirty—more than the innocent, friendly banter we’d previously engaged in. Her light touches to my knee lingered and, at first, I didn't think to remove her hands. It wasn't until I went to the bathroom and the cool air somewhat sobered me up. I could barely look at myself in the mirror as I washed my hands, afraid of what I would see.
I was entering dangerous territory and I had to leave. Not because I was worried something was going to happen; I didn’t want anything to. I didn’t want her like that. But I couldn’t deny that her attention made me feel good.
When I came back, I quickly made my excuses: my body was tried and I wanted to get some sleep before another busy day tomorrow. I ignored the flash of disappointment in her knowing gaze before I stumbled back to my room.
As soon as my head hit the hard pillow, I was out like a light.
And in the back of my hazy brain, a floating thought that I’d forgotten something clawed at me before darkness quickly took over.