Chapter Sixteen
sixteen
Lanie
Lanie left the chair’s office with two sandwiches, chips and soda from the dining hall tucked into her small tote and set off at a quarter after one. To her surprise, Ridley was standing at the massive brick archway and black wrought iron gates at the entrance to her university when she got there.
“Hey!” she said. “How are you already here?”
As she approached, Ridley’s face brightened without actually smiling. He pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose like he wanted a better look at her. “I think even as I said it, I didn’t realize how close we were to each other.” He surprised her by leaning in with a hand to her waist, giving her a peck on the cheek.
“Y-yeah,” she stammered, unnerved by his sudden closeness. “W-we’re practically on the same campus.”
“And it’s beautiful! It’s a real shame I’m not on this side of Manhattan more often.”
The tiny arboreal campus was the first location of the original liberal arts school that became her university and it remained tucked into a tranquil, if forgotten, little nook between the affluent old-money town houses of the Upper East Side and the East River. Lanie loved it because it reminded her of how much she enjoyed the hidden-in-plain-sight, Secret Garden –esque nature of their “main” campus. In truth, given her less than ideal experience in its halls of academe, she’d have quit years ago if not for the lush, idyllic grounds, her family of coworkers and the general kinetic bustle of student life.
“Can I...?” Ridley held his hand out and it took a moment before Lanie realized what he wanted.
Her heart gave an achingly painful thump in her chest when he didn’t reach for her hand, but for her tote. After a moment of hesitation, she gave it over. His eyebrows rose and fell quickly, looking at two large soda bottles jutting out the top.
“I like Italian soda.”
“Very much, apparently.”
“You’re usually Uptown, right?” She ignored his gentle ribbing.
“That’s right. West Harlem. Lead the way, Tour Guide,” he entreated her.
“It’s a little walk but a good place for lunch.”
Considering he had longer legs, Lanie could still have left Ridley far behind. Eventually, Lanie paused, waiting for him to catch up, then extended the crook of her elbow to him.
“Too slow for you?” He sounded amused.
“If we plan to get there and back before dark? Yes.”
Ridley rewarded her with a smirk, and obligingly took her arm. She clamped down on it, tucking him into her side like walking a three-legged race, and set a brisker pace.
“You New Yorkers. It’s obvious why none of you drive. You all have little motors in your backs.” Ridley wasn’t winded but it was clear he wasn’t accustomed to her faster pace as they crossed the avenues, headed west. The further they went, the more crowded the sidewalks became with shoppers, businesspeople and, as they got closer and closer to Fifth Avenue, tourists. As they passed Madison Avenue with its high-end boutiques, Lanie paused to look at the small cluster of bridal ateliers that lined the block.
“Window-shopping?”
Lanie came to a full stop, glancing between him and a particularly showy strapless dress with a straight neckline, crystal bodice, full skirt and a huge bow at the back. It would be ostentatious for her but exactly the kind of over-the-top style Gemma liked.
She’ll be shopping for something like this very soon.
“What?” Lanie asked once she realized Ridley was waiting for an answer to some question.
“Are you getting married sometime soon?”
She supposed he was teasing but since Ridley rarely smiled, it could just as easily have been a real question. But the possibility of that felt further away than ever before. And Lanie didn’t know how to feel. Like the question hit ctrl-alt-delete in her brain and she was waiting on the reboot. Lanie hated when she got like this.
“Lanie?”
“Huh?” Her eyes lost focus. He drifted into a haze in front of her. She shook her head, unable to formulate a coherent lie to change the subject.
He gestured at the dress spotlighted in the window with his chin. “Picking something for your cousin?”
“Certainly not for myself,” was all she could manage, feeling slightly lightheaded.
Lanie had never been especially fragile or desperate... despite recent appearances to the contrary. But try as she might, she couldn’t shake him—the only person she’d ever truly been in love with her whole life: Jonah. And now he’s marrying my cousin Gem.
She couldn’t escape the high-velocity impact of that reality, and it never failed to bowl her over. Shock her into a complete mental shutdown. She was supposed to be over this. She’d promised her grandmother and her mother and Narcisa she would be.
“I’m so sorry,” he said.
Lanie blinked. Ridley was looking down at her and holding her arm tightly now instead of vice versa. He was holding her steady, like she was about to pass out. She tried to shake him free but found her legs were a little wobbly.
“For what?” Since she was the one about to wither from embarrassment.
“I’m sorry about your friend and your cousin.”
Oh. My. God. “How much of that did I say out loud?”
“Did you not mean to say any of it?”
“No, I didn’t.” She looked back up at the dress in the window until Ridley distracted her.
“Oh. Well, don’t worry,” he cut into her thoughts. “I’m like a vault. Your secrets are safe with me.”
Lanie was still slightly dazed so she only understood every other word. Revealing her reluctance to attend the engagement party on that first plane ride to London was one thing. Admitting it was because she was in love with the groom once upon a time was completely different, a level of friendship Lanie wasn’t sure she’d reached with Ridley yet.
Ridley adjusted his grip on her arm, pulling her gently from the bridal shop window. Lanie didn’t resist and realized then she couldn’t have even if she wanted to.