8. Darius
Chapter eight
Darius
Darius felt the growing tension in the car as he exited the freeway for the surface streets that would take them into West Hollywood and then home. He knew Luis as well as he knew himself and would have been surprised if ideas of what would happen once they got home weren’t occupying his thoughts. They’d be occupying all of Darius’ as well if he hadn’t had to concentrate on getting them home in one piece so they could have those moments after they got there.
As it was, he nearly rear-ended someone who stopped at a yellow light rather than speeding through the intersection before the light turned red because he was more aware of Luis sitting next to him than he’d ever been. Luis, who had called him his boyfriend. Luis, who had said “I love you” to him and not meant it in a completely platonic way. Luis, who had called him full of fear that he’d lost Darius and then made all his dreams come true with those three words. Luis, who was and always had been his everything. Luis, who sat beside him, restless and unable to stop biting his lower lip the closer they got home.
“Is it weird to be nervous?” Luis asked as Darius pulled into his parking space next to Luis’ bright pink Mini Cooper convertible.
“I don’t think so because I’m right there with you.” Darius put the car in park and turned off the ignition, then reached for Luis’ hands and brought them up to his lips. “This is new for us. I think it’s normal to be nervous and maybe a bit overwhelmed.” He kissed each of Luis’ fingers in turn, pausing between words as he spoke. “We don’t have to do anything, you know. We can take it slow. However it works for us is how it works. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Neither am I.”
Darius stared into Luis’ eyes and was met with an intensity and growing heat as Darius continued to kiss his fingers.
“Like hell we’re going to wait,” Luis said, his voice husky. “I’ve loved you and wanted you for as long as I can remember. Let’s get out of the car. Go inside. And show each other what we want.”
They stared at each other, the tension, the desire building between them. Darius had no idea who made the first move, but suddenly, they were kissing, mouths opening to each other, tongues tangling, teeth scraping against lips as if they were trying to devour each other. It was messy and uncoordinated, completely different from the kiss they’d shared in the airport. That one had been a welcoming home, a promise of everything he and Luis had been and would be together, while this kiss was born of repressed and pent-up desires that no longer had to be hidden or held back or denied.
Darius’ body jolted to life, a searing ball of white-hot energy forming in his chest. The longer the kiss went on, the more Darius felt as if his whole being vibrated with this energy. And it wasn’t just him. He felt Luis, not just his body, but his heart and his soul. Nothing he had ever experienced compared to this moment with this man, but as amazing as it was, Darius knew they were moving toward a moment that would transform them.
Pulling back from Luis, Darius raised his hand and cupped Luis’ cheek. “Let’s go inside, chico. Please?”
Leaving Luis’ flight bag and the roses in the car, along with the uniform jacket and vest Luis had tossed in the back, they got out. They were giddy as teenagers as they made their way out of the parking garage, stopping to kiss every few feet. As they attempted to climb the stairs to the condo they had called home for the past six years, they kept falling against each other and laughing, then kissing again. With Darius one step below Luis, their mouths met at exactly the right height, and Darius wished Luis would wrap his legs around his waist so he could carry him the rest of the way to the door. He grinned at Luis as an idea entered his mind.
“You’re planning something, aren’t you?” Luis asked.
“Me?” Darius gave him a smirk. “Just want to get upstairs as quickly as we can.” He gave Luis another kiss, then squeezed his ass, making Luis fumble with his keys and nearly drop them. At the door, he actually did drop them—twice—as he tried to unlock it. Darius took them from his hand.
“Is anyone else home?” Luis asked as Darius turned the doorknob.
“Nope. Ricky’s on a flight, and Greg went up to San Francisco to visit Micah so we could have the place to ourselves.” He pushed the door open but blocked Luis’ way forward by kissing him again. It was a sweet kiss this time, but no less intense. Then Darius bent down and swept Luis up in his arms.
Luis’s laugh was full of joy as Darius carried him across the threshold and into the condo. “Oh, my God, I cannot believe you just did that,” he said as Darius swung the door shut with his foot and lowered him to the floor.
Crowding Luis against the door, Darius aligned their bodies and lowered his mouth to Luis’ but stopped just before he made contact with Luis’ lips.
“And I’m gonna do a lot more than that,” Darius said as he closed the distance between them and lost himself in the joy and pleasure of kissing his best friend without worrying he would jeopardize their friendship and lose the most amazing man he’d ever known. He trusted that it wasn’t possible to ruin what they had.
Luis melted against him, his body going soft and pliant as Darius plundered his mouth. His hands loosened Luis’ tie and slid it from around his neck, let it drop to the floor, and then he undid the top buttons of his uniform shirt and pulled it out of Luis’ pants. They both fumbled off their shoes, kicking them to the side and out of the way.
Then Darius took Luis by the hand and led him toward the bedroom. They paused once again in the doorway and stared into the room they shared. There had always only been one bed in this room since it had been Luis’ until he confessed how much he hated sleeping separately from Darius when they were under the same roof. It had become their bed, but only for sleeping or cuddling unless they invited a third home with them, and those men were only there for a few hours, a night at most, before leaving Luis and Darius alone again. They’d never stepped into this room as lovers—or potential lovers—until now.
Darius took Luis’ hand in his. “Do you still want this, chico?”
Stepping around him, Luis crossed through the doorway first, then turned, still holding Darius’ hand, and pulled him forward. “I have never wanted anything more. Come here.”
With his heart pounding, Darius let Luis lead him to the side of the bed. This moment felt almost surreal. He’d fantasized about it for as long as he could remember even though it seemed impossible until the night of the quincea?era when Luis had kissed him. Even after Luis broke his heart when he didn’t remember it and then broke it again when he came out but chose someone else to be with, Darius had still dreamed of a moment like this when Luis would be his in every way possible.
“I love you,” Darius said, eyes searching for any sign of doubt, any hesitation in his best friend’s expression.
“I love you, too,” Luis said and looped his arms around Darius’ neck so he could pull him into another kiss.
This kiss lingered, a slow coming together as their lips met and their breath mingled. Darius tasted Luis on his tongue, something he’d been too overwhelmed to notice until this moment, where the only thing filling his senses was Luis. He reveled in the things he already knew and the things he was learning. Luis’ taste. His smell. The way he felt in Darius’ arms. The familiar was made new, and the new was made wonderous.
Darius sat on the edge of the mattress without breaking their kiss and pulled Luis on top of him as he lay back, then rolled them so he lay on top of Luis. He ran his hands down Luis’ sides, then slid them under Luis’ shirt and tugged it over his head. There was a brief awkward moment because Darius had forgotten to undo the buttons on Luis’ cuffs, but he managed to get the shirt off without the need for future repairs.
The diversion dissipated the anxious tension that lingered between them like morning mist fading before the rising sun.
Luis’ kiss became more insistent, more heated. His hands slid under Darius’ T-shirt, pulled it up and over Darius’ head, leaving Darius no option but to lift up to extricate his arms. He tossed the shirt to the side and moved to lie down on top of Luis again, but Luis had other ideas. He was a bossy bottom even at the best of times, but Darius had never been the focus of his intentions before. It was thrilling to have Luis wrap his legs around Darius’ waist, the heels of Luis’ feet pressed against the place where Darius’ ass met his thighs. Thrilling to have Luis’ arms around his neck, to feel the pressure of those strong limbs pulling him down to join their mouths again, and to feel the small thrusts of Luis’ hips against his need began to drive them forward.
And then there were the sounds coming from Luis’ mouth. The sighs. The groans. The whimpers. An occasional curse whispered in either English or Spanish. All while Luis’ body writhed against his own, thrusting up to meet Darius’ hips or driving his heels against Darius’ ass to bring their still-clothed cocks into alignment.
A tortured sound tore from Darius’ mouth as he pushed himself up on his arms. “Stop, chico,” he panted. “You’re going to make me come, and I don’t want that yet.”
Luis wriggled beneath him, the hard ridge of his cock rubbing against Darius’ thigh. Darius closed his eyes and tried counting to ten to calm himself down. He only made it to three before Luis was scooting down the bed, leaving a trail of kisses on Darius’ upper body, his hands slipping into the waistband of Darius’ shorts. With teasing fingers, Luis slid the shorts over Darius’ hips, then down his legs, where Luis caught them with his feet and pushed them the rest of the way to the floor.
A newfound appreciation for Luis’ flexibility bloomed in Darius’ chest as he watched Luis work his briefs off next until Darius was completely naked, held over Luis by the strength of his arms and the intoxicating feel of Luis touching him. Those deft fingers and talented mouth teased and nipped at his abdomen, his hips, working lower until Luis’ nose nuzzled into the short, dark curls that framed the base of his cock.
Luis tipped his chin up, their gazes meeting in the protective cave created by Darius’ chest and arms. “Do you know how much I’ve been craving your cock in my mouth again?”
“How much?” A sly smile curved the corners of Darius’ mouth. “Because if it’s anywhere close to how much I want yours in mine, I’m gonna explode as soon as you touch me.”
“Oh, no, we can’t have that.” Luis laughed.
The sound brought tears to Darius’ eyes because it was so playful, so…Luis, his dearest friend, his soul twin. As much as he had loved Luis all his life and wanted him in every way possible, he had been afraid and uncertain, worried about how crossing the lines of their friendship might take away as much as it gave, even as they moved toward something that seemed inevitable. It was a faint worry, but a worry nonetheless, that they were being carried along by the aftermath of what had happened on Darius’ flight and that Luis’ panicked admission of being in love with him had been born from fear, not desire.
Those fears faded as Luis’ laughter, his teasing and silliness, surfaced. Darius couldn’t remember seeing Luis laugh with another man, and it settled something in him, let him relax and feel the rightness of this moment bathe him in contentment.
That feeling lasted only a few seconds, shattered as Luis moved beneath him, hands and mouth working on the sensitive flesh of his lower abdomen and inner thighs. A hand pushed at his leg.
“Move up,” Luis commanded. “I want your dick in my mouth, and I can’t get to it without falling off the end of the damn bed.”
“I’m not the one who crawled down there,” Darius said as he shifted his position so his head was on a pillow, his ass raised over Luis’s mouth. “And what’s this ‘I want your dick in my mouth’ business? What happened to asking for consent?”
“Fine.” Luis rolled up to his knees and turned so he was now facing Darius. “Please, may I have your dick in my mouth?”
Darius looked over his shoulder. “Maybe I want to hear you beg for it.”
“Really?” Luis reached down and stroked his fingers lightly over Darius’ balls, making Darius groan and shift his hips to get more friction. “That’s really what you want right now, Dar?”
“No. No.” The soft touches were driving him nuts, and it was his turn to flex his hips and chase after the contact he desperately needed.
Luis laughed again. “I didn’t think so. Roll onto your back, Dar.”
Not needing to be asked twice, Darius rolled over. As soon as his back hit the bed, Luis pushed his knees apart and moved into place between his legs. Instead of immediately going to town, though, he looked at Darius, eyes raking him from cock to face and back down. Luis licked his lips, then swallowed hard.
“You’re gorgeous, you know,” he said.
“You are, too, chico. You’re absolutely perfect. I can’t believe that we’re doing this.”
“I know. Now, hush, and let me take care of you, okay?”
“Okay. But don’t let me come.” Darius stared up into Luis’ eyes. “I want to be inside you.”
Luis grinned. “Oh, yeah. Don’t worry. I’ll be careful. Just lie back and relax.”
Still keeping eye contact, Darius sank back on the pillow and sighed as Luis began kissing his way down Darius’ inner thigh. He nipped lightly at the soft skin, then inhaled deeply at the juncture of pelvis and leg and groin.
“You smell so good,” Luis whispered, his voice low and sensual. “All musk and spice. I’ve always loved the way you smelled. I hug your pillows when you’re not home so I can smell you.”
Darius groaned. “I do, too, chico. Your scent drives me nuts. I could come from the way you smell.” He groaned again as Luis nudged his sac with his nose, this barest of touches arcing like electricity from his balls to his chest to his throat. When the tip of Luis’ tongue played with the sensitive skin, Darius’ head rolled back on the pillow, his mouth open in a soundless gasp. They hadn’t really done anything yet except kiss—Luis was still only half-undressed—and yet Darius felt as if his body was on fire. He knew his cock was leaking, could feel the damp, cool spot at the tip of his glans, and didn’t think he’d ever been so hard in his life. His cock ached. It fucking ached.
Just as Darius was about to break down and beg Luis to touch it, he was engulfed in the hot, wet heat of Luis’ mouth, and he yelped in surprise and joy. This felt nothing like what they had done before the world shifted and brought them to this place where Luis was taking him all the way to the back of his throat. It was glorious. Darius’ mind incinerated, disintegrated, left his body to fend for itself as rational thought ceased, and he was left with pure sensation and the unadulterated pleasure that reality was so much better than his fantasies.
He had no idea how long Luis worked him over, how many times Luis perfectly edged him to the point of climax, then backed off, but he knew when it was time to stop. Reaching down, Darius tapped on Luis’ shoulder, pulled him up and into his arms.
“I love your cock,” Luis said as he settled against Darius’ chest and brought their mouths together.
“It’s been too long since I got to kiss you,” Darius said as he ran his hands down Luis’ side. “And why the hell are you still wearing your pants?”
Luis giggled. “Because I was too impatient to taste you.” He aimed a flirty, sly grin at Darius. “And I didn’t hear you complaining.”
“I will never complain about you using your mouth on me wherever and whenever you want.” Darius bent his head and took said mouth once more, teasing along the seam of Luis’ lips until Luis opened for him.
As soon as their tongues tangled, Luis moaned, which ramped up Darius’ desire. He pressed harder, opened his mouth wider, and his teeth grazed against Luis’ lower lip, eliciting a sound that was half wail, half groan. In response, a growl rumbled from Darius’ throat without his conscious volition. His hands traveled all over Luis’ body, caressing, pressing, kneading as he found all the places he knew were most sensitive until Luis was a writing mess beneath him, clawing at the button on his pants and begging Darius to get them off him.
“Now, Dar, now, now, now. I can’t take it anymore. I need you.”
Darius didn’t think it was possible to be turned on more than he’d been, but the urgency in Luis’ voice, the way he was nearly crying as he begged, hit Darius in the very core of his being.
“Sh-h-h, chico,” Darius soothed as he slowed his hands, let them linger on Luis and drew them down his body until he encountered the waistband of Luis’ uniform pants. He undid the button and pulled the zipper down. “Is that better? They got twisted.”
Darius’ hand slipped inside, ran up the hard length of Luis’ cock, and felt the dampness where Luis had leaked all over himself. Luis thrust his hips upward, trying to get Darius’ hand to move, but Darius laughed softly at the frustrated whimpers coming from Luis’ beautiful mouth. In one movement, he pulled Luis’ pants and briefs off his well-muscled legs and tossed them aside, then scooped Luis’ legs up and over his shoulders as he lay down and buried his head between his best friend’s thighs.
“Fuck. No, Dar. I’m all sweaty and gross, and I just got off a sixteen-hour flight and…”
Luis batted at Darius’ shoulders, but Darius held tight, laughing at the feel of those light blows as he lifted Luis’ legs higher and exposed his hole. For a moment, Darius held still at the sight before him. He’d seen almost every part of Luis’ body, seen it since they were five, watched it change from boy to man, and loved every inch of it even before he first touched it. But he’d never seen this most intimate part before. When they played with others, this had still been a dusky shadow hidden like the most precious treasure. And now, Luis was offering it to him.
“Luis,” he breathed out. It was a prayer, an invocation, a benediction. “Chico…”
Unable to hold himself back, Darius leaned forward and put his mouth on that spot, let his tongue run over the knotted skin, pressed against the tight furl of muscles at its center. His heart soared at the sounds Luis made, at the rich, musky scent, the earthy taste, and the way Luis couldn’t help but press himself against Darius’ tongue.
As much as he wanted to be inside Luis, as much as his own cock ached with the need to tunnel its way into this most intimate of places, Darius wasn’t going to be rushed. He wanted to savor this moment.
“Relax, chico. I’ll take care of you.” Darius reached up and placed a hand on Luis’ belly while he continued to lap at Luis’ hole and press the tip of his tongue inside. He followed it with a finger, pressed into the spit-dampened skin, loving the way Luis’ muscle resisted, then relaxed and allowed him in.
Darius knew Luis didn’t need a lot of prep; he liked the bite of pain, the sensation that he might not be able to take a guy’s cock, and the profound relief when he did. He’d seen the bliss on Luis’ face as he took a cock deep into his body. As he worked Luis over, Darius marveled at how different this was from any other time he’d been with a guy. He and Luis knew everything about each other in every way possible. Even though this was their first time with each other in this way, Darius knew what Luis liked, what drove him crazy. He knew the map of Luis’ body, even if he did not yet know all of its topography.
“Dar,” Luis whimpered. “Please?”
“Can you reach the lube and condoms, chico?” Darius asked as he worked his finger deeper, brushing against that bundle of nerves that would send Luis soaring.
With a cry, Luis twisted his upper body and reached for the nightstand. Darius kept working at him, alternating finger and tongue, trying to drive Luis out of his mind. It seemed to work as Luis fumbled the drawer open. Darius heard the tumble of the lube bottle as Luis tried to grab hold of it and then the cry of triumph as he succeeded. His movements were uncoordinated as he rolled onto his back again and handed Darius the lube but held on to the condom.
“Do we need it?” he asked, and Darius stilled.
They were both on PrEP and tested regularly. They went together and shared their results with each other. There were no secrets between them, but neither of them had been bare with anyone.
“We can,” Luis said. “I just thought—”
“I know.” Darius let Luis’ legs slide from his shoulders, then rose over him so he could stare into Luis’ eyes. “Are you sure?”
“Of course.”
Darius shook his head. “I think we’re doing this all backwards.”
“Well, we could…” Luis aimed a flirty grin at him. “But I want to see your face.”
“Chico,” Darius breathed out and leaned down to kiss him. “I want to see yours as well.”
“All right.” Luis thrust his hips up at Darius. “Enough talk. Fuck me already.”
“Your command, my wish,” Darius said and flipped open the lube bottle.
He poured the liquid into his palm and smoothed it over his cock, then slid his finger back into Luis’ hole, adding a second to widen his entrance. And then it was his cock, pushing against Luis, breaching him, as they stared into each other’s eyes. They were both panting, Luis’ hips rising and falling in slow thrusts as Darius worked his way inside his body. It was everything he had ever dreamed of and so much more than he could have imagined and unlike anything he had ever experienced before.
“Oh, my God, chico,” Darius groaned. “You feel amazing.”
Luis opened his mouth, but no words came out, so he nodded and gasped, then thrust his hips up so Darius slid deeper. “Fuuuuuck,” he breathed out. “More. Fill me. Please. I need you.”
With Luis back to begging, Darius began to move, thrusting forward and pulling back so Luis would chase him. He was gentle at first, letting himself experience the moment, trying to hold the miracle of it in his mind, even as his body begged him to get as deep as he could inside Luis.
When he was fully seated, Darius leaned down. “I love you, Luis Roberto Herrera.”
“I love you, too, Dar.” Luis slapped a palm against Darius’ ass hard enough to sting. “Now, enough with the mushy stuff. Fuck me like you mean it.”
“Yes, sir,” Darius laughed.
He sobered quickly as he began thrusting into Luis for real with long, deep strokes and slow slides as he pulled almost all the way out, then slammed back in. Luis cried out, then reached for his cock and began to stroke. The sight of it was all the incentive Darius needed. He sped up, his cock driving into Luis in time with Luis’ hand.
They were both moaning, panting, the sound of the bodies coming together ramping up Darius’ arousal even more. His orgasm was building, and the need to come was almost overwhelming.
“I’m there,” he shouted just as Luis cried out and froze, body rigid, cum flowing from his cock and coating his hand. The sight of it, tipped Darius over the edge, and he felt as if his heart had exploded with the intensity of his orgasm. His cum filled Luis, the heat of it surrounding him, bathing him, joining him with Luis in a way he’d never thought possible.
“Oh, fuck,” Darius said as he lowered himself to the bed.
They shifted, still joined, so they could lie side by side as they regained their breath. Darius’ mind reeled with the rightness of this moment as Luis snuggled close to him. Even when he softened and slid from Luis’ body, they remained lying as they were, ignoring the mess on the covers until it began to feel uncomfortable.
“We’ll have to do laundry,” Darius said.
“Hush.” Luis kissed him. “We can do that tomorrow.” Another kiss.
“Okay.” Darius kissed him back.
“That was easy.”
“It’s not every day I get to make love to my best friend.”
Luis sighed and draped himself over Darius’ chest. “Is it weird that it isn’t weird?”
Reaching up so he could run his fingers through Luis’ coal-black hair, Darius shrugged. “Maybe. But I love you, and I think that’s all that matters.” He laughed.
“What?”
“It’s going to sound stupid.”
“Tell me.”
Darius could tell Luis was gearing up to tickle him and realized this might be a downside to falling in love with your best friend: they knew all your secrets.
“Dar…” Luis warned as his fingers moved toward Darius’ right side.
“Okay. Okay.” He took a breath. “Before you left, that whole thing with your mom about Andrés?”
“Yeah?” Luis had gone still against him.
“I thought…” He shook his head. “I’m telling you, this is stupid. You’re going to laugh.” Darius turned so he could fully see Luis’ face. “Okay. Right. Before you went to Brussels, I thought you were upset because you were in love with Andrés.”
Luis shot into a sitting position. “What on earth would have given you that idea? He’s a fucking asshole.”
“Yeah. I know. But the way you reacted to him being out of jail, I thought—”
“I hate him.”
The vehemence in Luis’ voice surprised Darius. He’d meant for this to be a joke between them, like how could Darius have thought Luis cared about Andrés? But Luis was angry. At Darius? At himself? He couldn’t tell.
“Come on, chico,” Darius soothed. He took hold of Luis’ hand and pulled him back down to the bed. “I know you don’t. Now. It was a passing thought, a way to explain why you never wanted me.”
“Never wanted you?” That got Luis lying back down. He faced Darius and came in close. “I always wanted you, Dar. Always. There were just…” Luis trailed off.
“I know.” Darius gathered Luis into his arms. “None of that matters anymore because now you’re mine, and I’m yours.” When Luis’ body relaxed, Darius smiled. “I am never letting you go, chico. I love you too much.”
Luis sighed. “Thank you.”
“Nothing to thank me for. It’s been the easiest thing in the world. The hardest thing was thinking I was never going to have you the way I wanted.”
They lay quietly, fingers tracing patterns on each other’s skin, trading soft kisses back and forth.
“Was that okay for you?” Luis asked.
“Are you fishing for compliments, chico?”
Luis wiggled against him. “Maybe.”
“Yes, it was very ‘oh-kay’ for me.” Darius rolled them over so he lay on top of Luis and joined their hands over Luis’ head. “And you?”
“Perfect,” Luis said. He lifted his head to kiss Darius.
“Hm. Good answer.” Darius moved his hips, and Luis sighed. A stray thought whispered through Darius’ mind. “We wasted so much time,” he said. “I wish I could have been your first.” Again, Luis stiffened, and Darius searched his eyes to see if he’d said something wrong, but Luis smiled at him and freed a hand so he could caress Darius’ face.
“You were, cari?o. You are my first love, my only love. No one else matters.”