Chapter Eleven #2
She finally broke the seal and opened it, flipping it around because it was upside down.
In the weak light of the bank of tapers that was lit to stave off the coming darkness, she peered closely at the writing, which she did not recognize.
She was halfway through the missive when she began to catch on to the message it bore.
As Millicent watched, Marian’s jaw went slack and her eyes widened.
Then, she read it again.
“What does it say, Marian?” Millicent asked, curious. “Who is it from?”
“I knew it!” she exploded, tossing off the coverlet in her rage. “I knew he sent me away from Ravenscar so that he could… could fornicate with that woman! I knew he sent me away just so he could shame me!”
She leapt out of bed, completely unmindful of the fact that she was now exposing her pregnant body to her cousin, who expressed some shock when she saw Marian’s rounded belly.
“Marian!” she gasped. “Are you with child?”
Marian had just collected her shift from a stool where Gaspard had tossed it when he tore it off her body, but her cousin’s words had her coming to a confused halt.
Puzzled, she took a moment to process what Millicent had said before suddenly realizing what she had done.
Her cheeks flamed as she quickly turned away and pulled the shift over her head.
“Aye,” she finally said, struggling to get control of her composure. “Aye, I am, but now… now I am shamed by my own husband!”
She was trying to turn the subject away from her, back to the source of her rage, but Millicent was on her feet, making her way towards her.
“Calm yourself,” Millicent said, taking her by the hands and bringing her back over to the bed where the missive lay upon the linens. “Calm yourself and tell me what has happened. Excitement is not good for the child. What does the missive say?”
Marian was quite agitated. “Read it for yourself,” she said.
As Millicent reached for it, she began to blurt it all out.
“I told you that Ronan is in Yorkshire to see to the affairs of a friend who was killed, but the friend has a beautiful wife whom my husband has apparently taken up with. Read the missive! And she is with child! His child!”
Millicent looked at her with concern as she picked up the missive and read the contents. As she did so, however, Marian was back on her feet again.
“Ronan has impregnated another woman!” she nearly shouted. “How can he do this to me? How can he shame me and my family like that? I cannot believe he would do such a thing!”
Millicent finished reading the missive and set it back on the bed.
She watched her cousin stomp around, shouting threats and curses at her husband, but Millicent had known her cousin all of her life.
She had been present at the marriage between Marian and Ronan, so she had seen from the start of the marriage how little affection there was between them.
Edmund de Grey and Blayth de Wolfe had orchestrated a miserable marriage for their children for the sake of an alliance, so Millicent knew enough to know that Marian’s posturing was all for show.
Perhaps there was some wounded pride there but, mostly, it was all for show.
Millicent wasn’t fooled.
She had also heard, from her servants, about the de Wolfe knight that went to Marian every night and bedded the woman until dawn.
Portepool Manor was a tight community of servants, people who had served de Haydon for many years, and they were extremely observant.
Millicent hadn’t missed the rumors of her cousin whoring around, but then again, it wasn’t the first time it had happened when Marian had come for a visit.
She was fairly adept at finding men to fill her bed.
Men who weren’t her husband. It was a shame because Millicent genuinely liked Ronan and they shared a good relationship.
She just happened to hate her own cousin.
“This is the first time he has done such a thing?” she asked calmly.
Marian threw up her hands. “Probably not,” she snapped. “He is gone so often and I never know where he is. There are probably a dozen de Wolfe bastards that I do not know of.”
“Including your own children?”
Marian’s raging came to an unsteady halt. “What do you mean?”
Millicent’s dark eyes lingered on her. “I mean the children you gave birth to,” she said.
“I have seen them, Marian. Your husband is not the father and I would wager to say he is not the father of the one in your belly, either, as you would more than likely wish me to believe. Shall we be completely honest with one another now? Lies do not become you, though you have been telling them all your life, so mayhap they do. But no more lies between us, please.”
Marian’s eyes were wide with shock and perhaps chagrin. “How can you…?”
Millicent cut her off. “Because everyone knows the children you have given birth to are not Ronan’s,” she said.
“You may as well stop pretending they are because everyone knows the truth. I also know that the knight you brought to Portepool Manor has been warming your bed nightly. Do you carry his child now?”
Marian stared at her for quite some time. Simply stared at her. Then, she went to collect a robe, all the while moving slowly and thoughtfully. Pulling the robe around her body, she went to sit in a chair near the hearth.
“I will answer your question if you answer mine,” she finally said.
“What question is that?” Millicent said.
“Do you love your housekeeper, as a wife would love a husband?”
“We are not speaking of me, Marian.”
Marian cocked an eyebrow. “Mayhap not,” she said. “But if I were you, I would not throw stones at others when you yourself have many secrets to hide.”
Millicent sat back in her chair, eyeing her cousin for a moment. “Mayhap I have misjudged you,” she said. “You are more cunning than I gave you credit for, but that does not change the fact that I know the de Wolfe knight has been in your bed every night since you arrived.”
“And if he has been?”
“Then I would say your outrage at Ronan is misplaced.”
“Since you have never been married, you are not in a position to give me advice about my husband.”
Millicent smiled thinly. “I may not have been married, but I know disloyalty when I see it,” she said.
“Marian, you have not fooled anyone. Even your father knows what you do. Do you think he would not? Do you think your activities have not reached his ears? You would be wrong. He knows you for what you are.”
“And he knows you for what you are.”
“At least I am not bearing bastards and trying to tell the world they are my husband’s children.”
“At least I have children.”
Millicent grinned. Then, she laughed softly. “You are a defiant, bitter woman,” she said. “But I respect you for the sheer fact that you do whatever you please, no matter what others think about you. That is commendable.”
Marian smiled thinly. “I could say the same thing about you.”
“I am not defiant and bitter.”
“Mayhap not,” Marian said, still smiling. “But I am happy with my life. Are you happy with yours?”
“Delightfully so,” Millicent said. “Do you trust me not to speak of this conversation, Marian?”
Marian thought a moment before nodding. “I do,” she said. “You are many things, but you are not a gossip.”
“True enough,” Millicent said. Then she quickly sobered. “Do you trust me?”
“Strangely enough, I do.”
“Then listen to me well,” Millicent said.
“Leave Ronan alone. No matter what he is doing, it is far less than what you have been doing all your life. Remember what Jesus said – let he who is without sin cast the first stone. And you, my darling, are full of sin so unless you want your sins to find you, I would suggest you not confront Ronan about this dalliance. Fingers may start pointing to you and you could not explain away all of the affairs you have had. Right now, it is a well-known secret that no one speaks of, but should you press Ronan for his infidelity, he has more than enough evidence against you to charge you with the same. I would wager to say the church would grant him a divorce in that case, which would ruin you. Is that what you want?”
Marian was pale by the time she finished. The smile from her lips was gone and her features were taut with distress. “He would never get a divorce,” she said firmly. “I would never allow it.”
“You may not have a choice, my darling.”
“I will kill him first!”
Millicent tipped her head back as if something had just occurred to her. “Ah,” she said. “So it comes. You want to kill the man, do you?”
Marian backed down. “I did not say that I want to,” she said. “I only said that I can. And I will if he tries to divorce me. I may kill him because of his disloyalty and no one would blame me.”
A smile played on Millicent’s lips. “If you were to do that, I am sure his father would have something to say about it,” she said. “The House of de Wolfe can crush the House of de Grey. Would you be willing to risk that?”
Marian sighed sharply. “You are putting words in my mouth,” she said. “You are trying to force me into confessing that I want to kill Ronan, but that is not what I wish.”
“That is not what you just said.”
Marian stood up, turning her back on her cousin as she pulled the robe about her body more tightly. As if to protect herself from Millicent’s sharp gaze.
“I will not be lectured to by someone who has never had a husband,” she said. “And how I live my life is my own affair. I will not be judged by you. Now you twist my words when it comes to Ronan and I’ll not let you do it. My marriage is my own affair, Millie. It does not involve you.”
She was right and Millicent knew it, but she was old enough and rich enough to speak her opinions and not worry about backlash.
But she didn’t want to fight with Marian about it, mostly because she knew she was right about Marian and her torrid life.
She was also certain that Marian knew she was right and simply refused to acknowledge it. With a sigh, she stood up.
“Very well,” she said. “We will not speak on it any longer, but know my opinion about it. What do you intend to do now? Will you return to Yorkshire?”
The thought of the long journey north again didn’t appeal to Marian, but scolding Ronan about his affair with the de Brito widow would make that journey well worth it.
It wasn’t often she had the opportunity to berate her husband and certainly not for something she did every day.
Ronan had never, in all the time she’d been married to him, been caught breaking his vows.
Not that Marian thought he ever had, but when she did it, it was different. When he did it…
She didn’t like it.
“I think so,” she said. “I will return to Ravenscar and demand he return to Roxburgh Castle with me. If he does not, I will go straight to my father and tell him about it. My father will have something to say.”
“When will you leave?”
“Immediately,” Marian said. “I see no reason to remain here when I have business to attend to in the north.”
Millicent simply nodded. “As you wish,” she said. Then she cocked her head thoughtfully. “Marian, will you allow me to travel with you? I’ve not been north in quite some time and could do with a little adventure. Besides… it would make the time pass more quickly if you had someone to talk to.”
Marian turned to her, frowning. “You cannot come if you are going to argue with me all the time.”
Millicent shook her head. “I promise I shall behave,” she said. “Now, may I go? I might continue north to see your father for a time. Edmund and I were always companionable.”
Marian shrugged. “Come if you wish,” she said. “But behave yourself.”
“There is no fun in that.”
“Then I shall make you walk all the way. You cannot ride with me.”
Millicent laughed softly and went to her.
She put her hands on Marian’s shoulders and kissed her on the cheek.
“Do not fret,” she said. “We will enjoy ourselves. I will send my maids up to help you pack your things and I will make sure the escort is prepared. Do you wish to leave tomorrow or the next day?”
Marian turned back towards her bed. “The next day,” she said. “Tomorrow, we will prepare.”
“As you wish.”
Millicent quit the chamber and Marian locked the door behind her this time.
She could hear Millicent’s footfalls as they faded away, down the stairs.
She couldn’t decide if it had been a mistake to let Millicent come with her or not, but she settled on indifference.
Millicent would insist on paying for everything, which was fine with her.
If Millicent wanted to come with her and pay all expenses, then Marian would let her.
Maybe she’d have Gaspard kill her, too.
Aye… that’s what she was considering.
Now that Ronan had humiliated her, Marian was wondering if she shouldn’t take Gaspard up on his offer.
With no Ronan, all obstacles would be removed.
Millicent hadn’t been wrong when she said that everyone knew of Marian’s activities.
Everyone knew what kind of a wife she was.
Marian lived her life pretending to be so discreet in everything but the truth was that people were smarter than she gave them credit for.
Especially Millicent.
And perhaps that would be her undoing.