CHAPTER 34
Earlier that day
MATT
Everything felt insignificant, so mundane that nothing even mattered anymore.
It was like that since the day she left me.
I hadn’t even touched my drums, and there wasn’t a single day in the past seventeen years since I took my first drumsticks had that happened.
Because everything reminded me of her.
It was so unfamiliar yet soul crushing.
I wanted my firecracker back with me.
Brightening my days with her sunshine smile and keeping me company at night with those wide hazel eyes.
“You seem grumpier than usual,” Mikey commented, eyeing me with concern for once rather than his usual playfulness.
I didn’t even bother to answer him.
His question made Emmie eye me with concern too. “You okay, Matty?” he asked, lowering himself to the couch while he adjusted his sling to make himself comfortable.
After the LA concert, everything went wrong for Emmie and his girl, Evy, and he had to spend a week in the hospital. But thankfully, he was okay now.
I didn’t bother answering him either.
This was the first time in a while we were all together other than the two shows we played in Madison Square and LA a while ago.
But I wasn’t in it. I only forced myself to come because the four of us were meeting after a long fucking time.
“Must be his girl,” Lan muttered, going back to staring at the ceiling while lying on the couch. He still had the same troubled expression on his face. He came after he learned Emmie got hurt, even Katy did. I still had no idea what was going on between them. They seemed to be together yet worlds apart, and I didn’t bother questioning or wondering about them because all I thought of was her .
“His girl?” Emmie frowned. “You’re dating someone?”
“Oh, I know who.” Mikey grinned. “It must be his pretty roommate.”
I held him in a stare, like he was the one to speak. He was sneaking behind Emmie, playing housemates with his little sister, Lily. But then, Mikey and Lily were always the endgame. I was glad they were finally coming to their senses.
“Sierra?” Emmie asked, smiling.
I shook my head.
His smile dropped, and Mikey’s brow pinched while Lan’s questioning gaze found mine.
“We’re not together anymore. And I don’t want to talk about it,” I said flatly.
They all collectively sighed but nodded, letting it go.
They knew me well enough to know I wasn’t a talker, and I didn’t like to discuss my personal life unless I wanted to.
I spent the rest of the night with them before returning to my empty apartment. I contemplated moving because every crevice of it reminded me of her.
Her feet in the air while she watched TV, the empty tray in the kitchen that she filled up with my favorite muffins, and her trail of Cheetos packets leading to her.
After a quick shower, I headed straight to my bed.
I curled up on top and dragged the sheets all over me.
It felt like I had a part of her wrapped around me, her smell stained on my sheets.
Because I was a fool for her leftover parts.
Sweet honey and vanilla.
But even that was fading now, and thinking about it only gaped the hole in my chest.
I had no idea how long it had passed when a strange sound slithered through the apartment. I frowned when it sounded once again, and it took me a while to recognize that sound as my doorbell.
No one ever rang my bell because everyone who visited me knew my code.
Who the fuck was it?
I swear if it was that fucker Mikey pulling some prank, I was going to punch his pretty face.
But the sight I opened the door to made everything in me freeze.
I blinked to see if it was real.
And very well, she was still there.
“Sierra?” I asked in a voice I didn’t recognize.
She looked dull with sunken eyes and pale cheeks, her hair wild, and her lips devoid of color.
Like she was so tired of the world.
A sight that made me ache, I wanted her to always be shining, not look like this sad version of herself. But there was fire in her wide hazel eyes that told me she was still somewhere in there.
She wore a small pair of shorts and the huge oversized T-shirt she usually wears when she goes to sleep. What the hell was she doing here in the middle of the night?
And before I could voice that question.
“I choose you,” she blurted. “I don’t choose my parents, I don’t choose my game, nor do I choose myself. I choose you , Matty Evans, because you’re the only man who wanted me for me without wanting anything back. And I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry for breaking up with you like that. I didn’t know what I was thinking. I thought I didn’t fit in your life, but the life I was thinking, was the life you showed the world, not the life you lived with me. Your real life. I think it’s the only place I would fit perfectly.”
What the fuck?
“I like the way I look in your eyes, Matty Evans, and I’ve never felt more beautiful. I love you with all that I am. I love you, the real you. The man standing in front of me, not the man staring at me from the posters on the wall. But then I love every version of you.”
I blinked, stunned.
She wanted me.
She loved me.
A beat grew in my heart, the cages shattering like it was starting to feel alive again.
Because of her.
Only because of her.
I was so in fucking love with this woman that it hurt.
“I know it’s probably too late now. I don’t know if I still have a chance with you. But I don’t want anything else. I’m sorry for everything that I did. There is nothing I want. Please, just I hope…”
“Sierra.” A simple I’m here would have sufficed. Her little speech was too adorable to stop, but I can’t wait anymore. “Shut the fuck up,” I muttered, gathering her in my arms as I took those beautiful lips in mine.
And it felt like I was breathing again.
Her moan vibrated into my mouth as her fingers held my face tightly.
I slammed the door behind us and walked into the apartment with her still in my arms, never stopping the kiss.
Our tongues twisted and loved each other, our breaths laced as one as we stroked through every depth of our mouths. It was the longest and the deepest kiss I had ever had.
And it was the sweetest kiss I would ever have.
“I want you, Matty,” she muttered as she came up for air. “I want you so fucking much it hurts.”
I pressed kisses all over her face. “You sure, firecracker?”
“I have never been more sure of anything.”
Fuck, she was making me so fucking hard.
I didn’t stop till I carried her to my bedroom and placed her gently on the bed with my body draped over hers.
She was so soft and supple under my touch.
“Matty,” she breathed when my lips left hers. Her hazel eyes pooled with love and trust as they peered at me.
Within seconds, our clothes were off, and she was bare and aching and wet underneath me.
God, she was so fucking beautiful.
Her cheeks pinkened when my eyes took in her beautiful body, a sight I would never get tired of looking at because every part of her was so damn beautiful.
Her pink lips were swollen from our kiss down to her delicate neck, which sloped to her full round breasts with dusky rose tips. Her slim waist and her wide hips and her adorably small legs and thick thighs with her dripping pussy burning for my cock.
Everything about her was breathtakingly beautiful.
I was never letting her go in this lifetime, even if she begged. There was no going back now. Sierra was mine, forever.