Chapter 8
CHAPTER 8
Echo doesn’t answer her phone. I leave voice mails practically begging her to call me.
Thirty minutes turn into an hour. Then two. My hope that Xavian didn’t get to her first evaporates.
What else is he doing to her?
Fuck .
Has he told Echo that I don’t have feelings for her? That I never intended to make love to her? That she should settle for a night with him instead? Is he already taking off her clothes? Getting her horizontal? Working his way inside her? Those possibilities have me pacing. He won’t value her the way she deserves. She’ll regret him.
I will, too. She’s mine…even if I haven’t yet confessed to her how I feel.
Seeing her things scattered around the room makes me miss her. Looking at the sofa she lay on last night while I plied kisses to her naked body makes me ache. Remembering the pleasure of Echo’s hair in my fists as she slid my cock into her mouth…and wondering if she’s doing the same to Xavian right now because he insists I feel an aloofness I’m not sure I ever did makes me in-fucking-sane.
By noon, it’s obvious she’s not coming back soon. I can’t just sit here. I need to stop what-ifing and find her.
I search the property, just in case, but it’s raining, so it’s easy to see she’s not at any of the virtually empty pools or on the deserted beach. She’s not in Xavian’s room, either. No one is. She’s gone. I don’t know where she is or when she’s coming back…or if she’ll even be speaking to me next time I see her.
Panic sets in. My chances with her slip away with every passing tick of the clock.
Desperate, I grab the rental car keys and head toward the only other place she might be. My head hurts like a bitch because I haven’t had food or coffee yet, and my stress level is off the charts.
As I jet down the damp, winding road, it hits me that I’m not half as worried about Echo giving her virginity to someone else as I am about her being so angry that I lied to her—even if I meant well—that she’ll cut me out of her life. Ironic, right? On the day I realize I’m in love with her, she may decide she doesn’t need a manipulative best friend who she’s convinced will never take her seriously as a lover.
I could blame Xavian for filling Echo’s head with bullshit. But if anyone deserves the blame, it’s me. I was too self-absorbed, too afraid, and too busy indulging in all the easy ass to see the right woman was in front of me. At the thought of not being able to pick up the phone to hear Echo’s soft, quirky voice or being able to see her adorable dimpled smile every day, I nearly lose my shit. A thousand Jaycis, Lindsays, Brittanys, and Angelas put together can’t replace my one perfect Echo.
Why was I so fucking stupid that I didn’t spend all my time and give my whole heart to the woman who deserves it most?
By the time I reach the Sunshine Coast Bed-and-Breakfast, the rain thankfully pauses. Keeley says something to the crowd of guests gathering for yoga by the ocean, then crosses the lawn to me with a frown.
“Hayes? What brings you here?”
“Hi. Have you seen Xavian and Echo today?”
She shakes her head. “He spent the night at Harlow and Noah’s place. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s with Bethany and Clint now, but I don’t know for sure. You think Echo is with him? You look upset. Are you all right?”
No, and I don’t know where to go from here. “Would anyone else know where to find them?”
“Um…hang here for a minute.” She runs back to the waiting guests, grabs her phone, and dashes off a quick text. Then she turns back to me, holding up a finger. Her phone lights up, and she scans it, then sends me a thumbs up and a smile.
What the devil does that mean? She knows where they are? Is she coming back to tell me?
Apparently not. She starts some of the flute-based yoga music she played the other day and warms up with the small crowd following her. Eleanor appears on the lanai with the baby. Is she coming with information about Xavian and Echo? When she sits and plays with the infant, making peekaboo faces and laughing, I guess not.
Finally, a tall stranger, dressed like a GQ model, complete with swagger, emerges from the back of the house. He waves at Eleanor, pauses to rub Kailani’s head, then heads straight for me. Who the fuck is this guy?
I swallow as he approaches, hand outstretched. “Sebastian Shaw.”
The sarcastic guy Xavian mentioned earlier. Is he coming to deliver a Dear John message on Echo’s behalf? “Hayes Elliot.”
“You’re wondering why I’m here. You met Evan Cook yesterday, right? He’s my boss and best friend.”
And one of X’s newfound brothers. “Yeah. Do you know where to find Xavian or Echo?”
“No. I’ve been here working on a project that… Well, let’s just put it this way. Nothing good comes when you sleep with the enemy.” He gives me an acidic, self-deprecating smile. “But that’s not your issue. I can help you find them. Xavian and I knocked back a few beers last night. He said you’re all friends?”
“Yeah. We’ve been super-tight.” Or we were until this week.
“But something happened?”
I nod and hope it’s enough. I don’t want to expend the time or humiliation explaining that everything blew up because I handled my feelings so horribly.
“Look, I know you don’t know me, but I’m willing to listen?—”
“I appreciate that.” The guy means well, but I don’t have time for this shit. “But I’ve got everything under control.”
“Sure, you do. That’s why you’re here asking strangers where to find your closest pals and looking half ready to crawl out of your skin.” He claps me on the shoulder. “I’ll leave you to it.”
Sebastian is a sarcastic fucker.
When he turns away, I growl under my breath. Damn it, he’s the only one who can help me right now. My pride has to take a back seat. “Wait. Please. I need to find Echo. She’s probably with Xavian. I have to talk to her.”
He crosses his arms over his chest and gives me a considering once-over. “Tell me the situation, and I’ll see what I can do.”
What the fuck? I’m not thrilled about word-vomiting all my personal shit, but the way he’s looking at me tells me he won’t move a muscle unless I start talking. “In a nutshell? I’ve been an idiot about my feelings for Echo, and I need to tell her before Xavian convinces her otherwise. He’s a good friend, but…she’s always been my closest. X doesn’t love her. He doesn’t even want her. So I can’t let her make a mistake with him.”
Sebastian stares at me for such a long time, I’m half convinced he’ll tell me to take my boo-hoo problems somewhere else and get out of his face. Instead, he sighs. “Sorry to hear that, man. I’ve kind of been in this situation.”
Of all the things he could have said, I didn’t expect that. “Seriously?”
“Not exactly the same, but enough to know how you feel. Um, Evan told you he was widowed before he married Nia?”
“He mentioned that.” I’m still shocked that a guy barely thirty had to bury his pregnant wife. “It sounds tragic.”
“For everyone. He didn’t love Becca.” Sebastian blows out a breath. “I did.”
Wait…what? “You were in love with your best friend’s wife? Whoa. Were you two...” The question slips out before I realize it’s none of my business.
“No. I would never have betrayed Evan like that. But he knows now that I loved her. We’ve talked. The one thing I can tell you? We all would have been less miserable if we’d been honest with ourselves and each other.”
“I’m trying to. That’s what I want to talk to Echo about. But I can’t fucking find her so I can ask her to listen.”
Sebastian nods slowly, then reaches for his phone. He shoots off a text, and gets one back quickly. “Go back to the hotel.”
“And do what? Echo isn’t there.”
“Wait. When she shows up, if she’s willing to talk, shelve your pride. Treat tonight like it’s your first—and last—chance to convince her to choose you. Take it from the guy who buried the woman he loved without ever telling her how he felt. Maybe the truth would have ruined everything. And maybe it wouldn’t have changed anything. I’ll never know. What I did learn? Regret is bitter, and it lasts forever.”
By eight o’clock that night, it’s a wonder I haven’t worn holes in the hotel room’s dark, utilitarian carpet with my pacing. Finally, I hear the click of the latch. The door slowly opens.
Echo steps in. She looks wary.
She’s been crying.
My knees nearly go out from under me. I did this to her, and I feel fucking horrible. What if she can’t forgive me? “Shortcake…I’m so sorry.”
She shakes her head, then looks past me, taking in the rest of the room with a confused furrow of her brows. Since I’ve been consumed by dread that she isn’t coming back, I’d half forgotten about the rose petals scattered across the pristine white comforter on our bed and the champagne chilling next to the nightstand.
“What’s this?” She sounds shocked and…something else. Horrified?
“My attempt to seduce you.” I cross the room to her, but stop short. I want to touch Echo, but I need to find out where her head is. “I guess Xavian told you I had no intention of making love to you.”
She nods, arms wrapped around herself as if she needs a hug and doesn’t trust me to give it to her. “He did.”
Goddamn it, I wish he would have let me confess my own screw-ups, but I understand why he didn’t. “I’m sorry for lying to you. You wanted to lose your virginity with someone who would make it good for you, and I took that decision away. It wasn’t fair.”
“So why did you?”
“When Xavian first let it slip that he intended to take you to bed, I told myself I couldn’t let you because you would regret it. He’s a man whore. He doesn’t love you…” I blow out a breath. “And I thought I could save you.”
That only seems to make Echo unhappier since tears mist her big eyes. “My decision must have seemed impulsive to you. I know you meant well, and I appreciate you trying to help me, but?—”
“I was an idiot. And an asshole. The truth is, I didn’t want Xavian touching you.”
“But you weren’t willing to, either.” She scans the romantic scene I staged and cringes. “Until tonight, I guess. But I don’t want your pity, especially not this kind.”
“What? No! That’s not?—”
“You don’t have to try and make me feel better. You’ve made your point. We’re friends. Just friends. And what I wanted went way beyond that.”
“Hang on.” I approach slowly and hold out my hand, hoping like fuck she’ll take it. “Echo, I just didn’t?—”
“Want me. I know. And I’m the one who’s sorry, string bean.” She shies away with a sniffle. “I haven’t been a very good friend.”
What the hell is she talking about? “No, you’ve always been the most loyal, caring, kind, positive?—”
“I’ve been lying to you about my feelings since I was a freshman in high school. That’s how long I’ve been in love with you.”
Shock drops the bottom out of my stomach. Is she serious? “You’ve felt this way for eight years?”
She nods, her expression desolate as more tears fall. “I was fourteen when I first realized it. I felt so lucky that the cutest sophomore boy was my best friend. I remember putting on my prettiest dress the first Thursday in December, when tickets to the Winter Formal finally went up for sale. I saw you buy a pair during lunch. Then you walked up to me, looking so excited. My stomach flipped and my heart pounded. I was sure you were going to ask me. But you invited Kaitlyn instead.”
I barely remember that girl…except that we made out after the dance, and I got my hands on her tits.
“You took Allie to Spring Fling. You asked Jasmine to the End-of-School bash. And you spent all summer having sex with Dakota.” She’s sobbing now.
Shit. I’ve hurt her so much. I want to touch and comfort her, but I have no right. I feel like a heel for never noticing her feelings.
“Shortcake, I had no idea…” I reach for Echo.
She shrugs me off. “Because I didn’t want you to. But it hurt to hear you talk about other girls all the time, especially what you did with them.”
I did talk. Hell, it probably sounded like bragging. I didn’t think Echo noticed. Or cared.
No, you didn’t think at all, dumb ass .
“I kept everything to myself because I didn’t want to be one of those clingy girls you shed. I couldn’t stand the thought of not being around you. And I couldn’t stop hoping you’d finally see me. But you didn’t.” Her voice tells me it was crushing. “College was pretty much a rinse and repeat.”
I had no clue. All those years…
“Is that why you chose Xavian to take you to bed? To see if it would hurt me? So I could know how you felt?”
“No. It was my last-ditch effort to see if who I did mattered to you. If you’d be…jealous. X kept insisting you would.”
“He was right. I was jealous as hell.”
“Because I tricked you into it. Otherwise, you would have never thought about me as more than a friend. I wanted you to see me so badly for once…” Pain twists her face. “So when I begged Xavian to help, he agreed.”
My eyes narrow. “Help you how?”
“He started by picking out my clothes for two weeks.”
“All those dresses and bikinis?” The ones that had me salivating, like the short, sunny yellow breast-hugging shift she’s wearing right now? “They were his idea?”
She nods miserably. “We went shopping. He chose everything, down to the lingerie.”
I should have guessed, and the fact he’s probably seen her in everything designed to tempt me shreds my guts. “What about the white nightie I could see through once your hair dampened it?”
“That, too. All of it.”
“Fuck.” I’m going to threaten Xavian if he even thinks about Echo as a woman again.
“I asked him how to drive you crazy, and he coached me on what to do and what to say. I thought I was ready for whatever happened.” She winces. “The night we arrived in Hawaii, I had to act upset, but I was thrilled to hear you’d intentionally prevented him from spending the night with me when I’d supposedly planned to give him my virginity.”
Supposedly? “You weren’t going to?”
“Of course not. I never had any intention of letting him touch me. I only wanted to know if the possibility he might would matter. Instead, I got impatient and I kissed you. I was horrified that I’d thrown myself at you, and I ran. And like the amazing friend you are, you found me, calmed me, took me back to our room, and forgave me. I should have stopped hoping then…but I felt a spark during that kiss.”
“Oh, it was more than a spark, shortcake.”
“You felt it, too?” She’s shocked.
“Yeah. It blindsided me.”
A soft flush steals up her cheeks. “After that kiss, I couldn’t stop aching.”
And like a flaming idiot, instead of wrapping her in my arms and taking her to bed, I tried to figure it out. Dissect it. I kept her waiting and wanting. Worrying and wondering. No, I didn’t know she had some ploy up her sleeve, but since I know Echo I should have guessed. Her behavior didn’t add up. My only excuse? I hadn’t thought of her in that way before, so I was slow to catch on. But I’m all in now. Echo is someone I can see myself loving, not just for tonight or this week—but for years.
For forever.
I hope I haven’t killed what’s between us. She’s being honest about her feelings now—and I’m glad—but her face is closing up. How do I prove that my blindness had nothing to do with her, just my idiocy? How can I make her happy?
“But it was a stupid idea to think that friendship could translate into more simply because I ran around in a bikini or two.” Her voice warbles. “I’m sorry I tried to manipulate you. I hope our friendship will recover someday. I’ll get my stuff and move down the hall to Xavian’s room. Enjoy the rest of your vacation.”
She lowers her head and makes a beeline for her suitcase, but not before more tears fall down her cheeks. Then her words register. She’s leaving?
Hell no.
I hustle behind her and grab her arm, wrapping my own around her waist and bringing her against me, then settle my lips on her ear. “It wasn’t a stupid idea, and I don’t want you to go.”
Echo sends a cautious glance over her shoulder. Our faces are inches apart. The hope in her wide eyes nearly kills me. “What are you saying?”
“Stay, shortcake. I want you. I need to show you how much.”
Slowly, Echo turns in my arms. My sense of relief is dizzying when she lets me bring her closer. But before I can kiss her, she stops me. “Are you saying you’re willing to sleep with me?”
“Willing to? Try dying to. I woke up this morning and realized I’m crazy about you—and not merely as a friend. I’ve probably felt this way for a long time, and I was too blind to see it. I?—”
“You don’t have to say that to make me feel better. I know you and Jayci are…together and?—”
“Not anymore. Listen to me, Echo. I love you.”
Her lips part on a soft gasp. “No. You’re just saying that.”
“I’m not, shortcake. I’ve never said those words to Jayci—or any other woman I’ve been with—so I’m not blurting BS to make you feel better. You’ve opened my eyes, and I want you to know what’s in my heart. Jayci isn’t important to me. None of those girls were. But you were always beside me. Now let me be here with you.”
Echo searches my eyes. A duo of fresh tears falls down her cheeks. “You always have been.”
“Not in the way I should have. How did you stay such an amazingly loyal, wonderful friend when I kept hurting you?”
“Because I love you. And I kept hoping that, one day, you’d love me, too.”
“I do,” I assure her in a fierce whisper as I cup her face in my hands. “I love you more than I realized. More than you know. More than I can tell you with a few words. If you still want me, I won’t hold back from showing you how much. And we’ll never let the Jaycis and the Xavians of the world come between us again.”