Chapter 3
CHAPTER 3
Jane wanted to die. Hours earlier, she’d been giddy about her conversation with Storm, and now she wanted to sink into the ground and disappear. Knowing he’d been the one who’d found her on her hands and knees, puking her guts out and covered in CS gas, was already embarrassing as hell. And if that wasn’t enough, he’d stripped off her clothes and seen her in all her fifty-one-year-old glory.
She didn’t expect herself to look like she had at twenty, but she wasn’t sure being practically naked in front of the man she’d been crushing on before they’d even enjoyed more than small talk was the way to catch his attention. And she certainly didn’t want to be scrubbed down like she was in a car wash, but protocol was protocol.
She’d almost had a heart attack when she’d looked to her left and saw Storm standing next to her in nothing but his underwear. He’d given her a lopsided smile and shrugged…and something inside her had melted in that moment. He didn’t have to strip, and they’d both known that. He wasn’t there when the box had exploded, and any pepper spray on him was secondary transfer from her own clothes and hands. But he’d done it anyway.
That right there had been enough to earn her loyalty and undying support from here to eternity.
Now she was sitting in the medical clinic on base, wrapped in a huge blanket and wearing a pair of scrubs someone had scrounged up for her, waiting to be discharged.
Her eyes still burned, and she hadn’t been able to stop coughing, but at least she didn’t feel as if she were going to bring up her lungs with every cough anymore.
Naval Criminal Investigative Services was looking into the package and trying to figure out who’d sent it. Rear Admiral Creasy and his wife had been alerted that he’d been the target of a mail bomb, and they were taking precautions until the sender could be identified and apprehended.
The mail room was under quarantine until further notice, and Jane knew she’d have a ton of extra work to do to get things up and running in the temporary room they’d been given. She was extremely proud of her staff for acting immediately and doing exactly what they were trained to do. Namely, leaving her in the room and going to get help. The last thing anyone wanted was for a contaminant to spread and hurt or kill more people. This time the bomb only held pepper spray, but next time it could be anthrax or sarin.
If she was being honest with herself…she was lucky. Still, everything about the last few hours had sucked. She literally thought that was it, she was dead. When the box exploded, she’d had a split second to regret all the things she hadn’t done in her life, and some of the things she had. Then, instead of dying, when she’d fallen to the ground in the most pain she’d ever felt in her life and couldn’t breathe, she’d wished she was dead.
And to make things worse, the man she admired more than anyone in the world, who she wanted to impress, had come in when she had snot running down her face and a pile of vomit in front of her and couldn’t do anything to help herself.
But…Storm had been amazing. Strong when she’d been weak. He’d taken over and done what needed to be done. It had been a very long time since she’d been able to rely on anyone. The only thing she’d had to think about when Storm had arrived was doing exactly as he said. She’d felt safe in his arms, and even though it had hurt like hell to open her eyes, she’d done it when he’d ordered her to, grateful to see him.
Of course, wishing she was about thirty pounds lighter now was useless, given the fact that she’d been almost naked in front of him. But she couldn’t be too upset when she recalled the look in his eyes when she’d last seen him. Respect and admiration.
Or she could’ve just been delirious and it was actually pity.
Closing her eyes—because it still felt better than having them open—Jane put her head on the back of the chair she was sitting in and prayed the doctors would hurry up with her discharge papers.
The minutes inched by slowly. Her head hurt. All she wanted to do was go home and take another shower—she didn’t think she’d ever feel clean again—and sleep. She was exhausted and didn’t want to think about anything anymore.
Her stomach growled, but she ignored it. She’d attempt an apple or something when she got home, but truthfully, the thought of eating turned her stomach.
“Hey.”
The one word was said softly, but she still startled badly.
Eyes flying open, Jane stared at Admiral Storm North. He was leaning against the doorjamb of her room, staring at her. She had no idea how long he’d been standing there, but she had the feeling it had been a while.
“Hi,” she croaked. Her throat was scratchy from all the coughing, sounding funny to her own ears.
Storm frowned. “What are you still doing here?”
“I’m waiting to be discharged.”
He looked at his watch. “It’s eight-thirty.”
Jane raised an eyebrow. “I know.”
“Damn,” he muttered. “I’ll be right back.”
Too tired to care where he was going, Jane closed her eyes again and rested her head on the back of the chair once more.
It could’ve been five minutes or an hour when Storm returned. “The doctor should be here with your discharge papers in a minute or two.”
Jane opened her eyes and looked at him. “What’d you do, threaten to court-martial him?”
When Storm didn’t even crack a smile, Jane frowned. “You didn’t…did you?”
“No,” he said, coming toward her. He squatted in front of her chair and stared into her eyes. “How’re you feeling?” he asked quietly.
Jane shrugged. “I’m okay.”
He frowned at her answer. “How about you try that again…and be honest this time?”
Jane sighed. “I’m okay, Sir. A little tired, my head hurts, and my eyes still sting a bit, but I’ll be fine in the morning.”
“I told you to call me Storm,” he told her.
Jane licked her lips. She saw his eyes dart down to her mouth, then back up to meet her gaze once more. She couldn’t read the look in his eyes. “I’m not sure that’s appropriate.”
“You don’t work for me. You aren’t even in the Navy. And after what we went through today, I’d say it’s more than appropriate.”
Jane couldn’t argue that. “I haven’t thanked you, have I?” she asked.
Storm shook his head. “No need.”
She snorted. “I’d say there is.”
Then he shocked the shit out of her by bringing his hand up and palming the side of her neck. His thumb brushed against the underside of her jaw lightly as he said, “How have I known you for so long without ever really seeing you?”
The question was said softly, and Jane wasn’t sure if he really wanted her to answer or if he was talking to himself. Either way, goose bumps broke out on her arms.
“I’m glad I was there,” he went on. “When I heard something had happened in the mail room, I couldn’t even think about evacuating the building.”
“Why?” Jane whispered.
“Because I just knew you’d be down there, working to contain whatever happened, and that you might need help.”
“That wasn’t smart,” she scolded. “If that had been anthrax or something worse, you would’ve gotten hurt as well.”
“But it wasn’t, and you did need help,” he said easily. “And I couldn’t not go. I can’t explain it. I suddenly feel as if I’ve known you forever, but at the same time I know next to nothing. I had decided after our talk this morning to take things slow. Get to know you better. Maybe ask you out after a month or so. You’re funny. Beautiful. Smart. Independent. All traits that I admire and respect.
“What happened today feels like someone smacking me upside the back of my head and telling me to get my shit together. I, more than most, know how short life can be. I’m normally a go-after-what-I-want kind of guy, but I thought I should go slow with you. I mean, why would you think I was seriously interested if, after knowing you for so long, I suddenly asked you out? So I’d decided to wait. But…fuck that.”
Jane stared at Storm with huge eyes. Was he serious? He couldn’t be.
“Want to go out to dinner tomorrow night?”
“With you?” she blurted.
He chuckled. “Yeah. With me.”
She opened her mouth to say not only yes, but hell yes, when the doctor chose that moment to enter.
Storm stood but didn’t leave the room.
“Sorry about the delay. I’ve signed your papers and you can head home. If your eyes continue to burn after another eight hours, please come back, and we’ll check you out again. And I’m serious about that. Don’t think it’ll just go away. CS gas is caustic, and you took a direct hit to the face. You could lose your eyesight if you don’t take it seriously.”
Jane nodded at the doctor. “I will.”
“And you should rinse them out at least every three hours tonight. Set an alarm to get up and do it. Don’t go home and fall asleep and forget. It’s important, Ms. Hamilton. Do you have someone who can make sure you get home all right?”
Jane opened her mouth to tell the doctor that she was a grown-ass woman and could manage to get a taxi and get herself home, but Storm beat her to it.
“I’m taking her home.”
“Great.” The doctor turned to the admiral and handed over her discharge papers, explaining in detail what she should be watching for in the next twenty-four hours. “Any questions or concerns?”
The question was aimed at Storm, which annoyed her. To his credit, though, Storm looked at her and raised an eyebrow. She shook her head, just wanting to go home instead of getting into an argument about misogyny.
“Okay. Again, come back if you start feeling more pain or have other symptoms. I’m very glad you’re all right, Ms. Hamilton. People who send mail bombs are cowards, and it’s a relief no one got hurt worse.” And with that, the doctor, turned and left the room.
Jane scowled when the door shut behind him.
Storm held up a hand. “Before you rip me a new asshole, I had nothing to do with that. And I agree that it was sexist and annoying. He should’ve been talking to you, not me.”
Jane’s anger deflated instantly. “I hate that,” she said. “I mean, I’ve been working on this base for a very long time, you’d think I’d be used to being talked down to, but I’m not. I’m perfectly able to take care of myself, and it’s rude as hell for him to essentially pat me on the head and talk to you instead of me.”
“I agree. You ready to go?”
Jane took a deep breath. She could continue to rail at the sexism, not to mention unprofessionalism, of the doctor, but she couldn’t fault his expertise. He’d also been as gentle as possible when he’d cleaned out her eyes and examined her. “I’m ready,” she said. “But you don’t have to take me home, Storm. I’m a big girl, I can get there by myself.”
“I know, but your apartment’s on my way. It’s not a big deal.”
Jane stood, giving him side-eye. “How do you know where I live?”
She could’ve sworn she saw Storm blush. “I…uh…looked it up before I headed over here. If you were still here, I figured you might need a ride.”
Jane couldn’t help but smile. “Fine. You can take me home.”
As they walked out of the room, Storm said, “You’re a hard woman to do a favor for.”
Jane shrugged. “I’ve been on my own a long time. Had to do everything myself. Learned the hard way that relying on someone else brought me nothing but heartbreak.”
Storm looked at her as they passed through the waiting room at the clinic. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’ve had a long time to get over my ex. What’s that line from Shawshank Redemption ? Get busy livin’ or get busy dyin’. I chose to live.”
Then Storm shocked her for the second time in minutes by reaching out and taking her hand in his. He did it so smoothly that it felt completely natural and not awkward in the least. “Some birds aren’t meant to be caged,” he said quietly as they headed outside and toward the parking area. “When they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up rejoices, but still, the place you live in is that much more gray after they’re gone.”
Jane stopped in her tracks, and since he was holding her hand, Storm stopped too. “That was from Shawshank too,” she told him unnecessarily.
“It was. Best fucking movie ever. I’ve watched it at least a hundred times, and every time I’m flicking through the channels and see that it’s on, I have to stop. That part where Red is narrating how Andy Dufresne crawled through five hundred yards of shit and came out clean on the other side gets me every time,” Storm said.
Jane nodded. “Most people don’t think it’s a very uplifting movie, but I can’t help but think about how much Andy changed everyone’s lives in that prison.” Then she blushed. “I mean…I know it’s fiction, but?—”
“I know what you mean,” Storm assured her. Then he squeezed her hand. “Come on, let’s get you home. You’ve got to be tired.”
And without a word, Jane let him lead her to his car, a navy-blue four-door VW Golf. When they were inside headed toward the exit of the base, she couldn’t help but tease him. “A Golf?” she asked.
Storm chuckled. “I know, but she’s got a two hundred ninety-two-horsepower engine in her that matches the power of a Ford Mustang. I like staying under the radar but having the ability to get the job done when it counts.”
Jane stared at him for a second, then bit her lip trying not to laugh. But it was no use. She burst out laughing at the serious look on his face.
He glanced over at her in surprise, then grinned. When she had herself under control, he said wryly, “Didn’t mean that the way it sounded.”
“I guessed,” Jane told him.
“You should do that more often,” Storm said.
“What?”
“Laugh.”
Self-conscious now, Jane looked away, turning to stare out the window.
“Shit, sorry. It was a compliment. I loved that even after the shittiest day ever, you could still find something to laugh about. Your smile lights up your face and makes you even more beautiful than you already are.”
Jane turned again to look back at Storm. Her head was spinning at how he’d gone from being one of the men she delivered mail to each day to someone who had asked her out and was now going out of his way to flirt with her. It was as confusing as it was flattering and exciting. But Jane wasn’t about to throw herself headlong into a relationship with anyone …she was too jaded for that.
“You’re confusing me,” she admitted softly.
“How so?” he asked without hesitation.
“Twelve hours ago you didn’t know I existed. And now…” Her voice trailed off.
Storm winced. “I’m coming on too strong. I know, I’m sorry. Here’s the thing…I’ve always been the kind of man who keeps my head down and gets the job done. I was that way as a SEAL, and I’m that way as a commander. I tend to focus on one thing at a time, and that’s not always a good thing. I’ve known of you for a while, but never really took the time to get to know you.
“This morning, I realized that I’d been an idiot. That you’ve been right in front of my face the whole time, but I was too busy looking down, getting the job done. I couldn’t see the forest for the trees. I’d already decided to change that. To get to know you even better, and then that damn CS bomb happened. It was a massive wake-up call. And I’m a very determined man, Jane.”
“I’m not a mission,” she gently chided. “You can’t just decide you want me and expect to get me.”
Amazingly, his cheeks flushed. “I know, and I’m saying this all wrong. I’m still willing to take things slow, but I’m letting you know up front what my intentions are.”
“And what are your intentions?” Jane asked. “I’m not interested in anything casual,” she told him. “But I’m not necessarily looking for another husband either. Tried that, it didn’t work out. I’m too old to go out to bars to pick up men, and honestly…I don’t need a man.”
“But do you want one?” Storm asked quietly.
Jane blinked in surprise.
“I’m asking because the older I get, the more I realize how lonely I’ve become. I love my job and what I do, but when I’m lying in my bed at night, alone, I wonder what it’d be like to have someone to share my life with. I’m well aware that time is passing, and with each tick of the clock, my life is getting shorter. Eventually I’ll have to retire, and spending the rest of my days with only myself for company isn’t something I’m looking forward to.”
This was a very deep conversation, but Jane couldn’t help but be drawn to Storm even more for being honest. “When I got divorced, I thought I’d find someone else and remarry. But as time went by, and as I struggled with raising my daughter, eventually I became resigned to the fact that I’d be alone the rest of my life. But to answer your earlier question…I’m not opposed to finding a man I can love again. Someone who respects me and doesn’t expect me to be someone I’m not. I’d like someone who shares some of my interests, so we have something to talk about when we’re old and gray. Well…older and grayer.”
“Like Shawshank Redemption ?” Storm asked.
“Yes,” Jane said quietly. With a start, she realized that they’d arrived at her apartment complex.
Storm pulled up at the entrance and turned to look at her. “Are you going in to work tomorrow?” he asked.
Jane nodded. “Yeah. Things are going to be insane. I doubt the mail room will be cleared yet, but the mail doesn’t stop. We’ll need to sort everything by hand. Not to mention deal with upset customers whose stuff is stuck in limbo in the mail room. I have to be there.”
“I figured that’s what you’d say.”
Jane mentally gave him brownie points for not insisting she stay home and rest.
“I know we usually get to work around the same time in the morning. I’ve seen you pull into the parking lot more than once. Since your car is still on base, I’d be happy to swing by here and pick you up tomorrow…if you haven’t made other arrangements.”
Jane’s first inclination was to decline. To say that it was an imposition for him to pick her up. That she could call a taxi.
Then she reconsidered. She’d been half in love with this man for months. She’d be an idiot not to take him up on his offer. He might turn out to be a jerk, but at least she’d know and could get rid of her stupid crush.
But what if he wasn’t? What if he was as amazing as he seemed to be?
“I’d appreciate that,” she told him finally.
He smiled. “Good. For a second, I thought you might refuse me. Then I’d have to go home and lick my wounds and figure out another way to spend some time with you.”
“Well, you did ask me out to dinner tomorrow,” Jane blurted, then immediately regretted it. Shit, maybe he’d forgotten about that, or even changed his mind.
“I did. But you haven’t answered yet.”
“I don’t like seafood,” she said. “I mean, I know we live near the coast, but I’ve never acquired a taste for it.”
“Noted,” Storm said easily. “I’ll be sure to pick a place that has a variety of things to choose from. I’m not into fancy restaurants,” he said. “Especially not on first dates.”
“That’s fine with me. I’m more of an Olive Garden kind of girl than a Ruth’s Chris.”
“So it’s a date?” he asked.
Jane nodded.
His gaze bored into her own. “You won’t regret it. I won’t let you down, Jane,” he said seriously.
“I hope not,” she replied. “Although I should warn you, I’ve had a crush on you forever, so you’ve got a lot to live up to.”
She couldn’t believe she’d admitted that, though she also couldn’t deny something about Storm made her feel completely at ease.
Jane loved the glimpse of the small dimple in his cheek when he smiled. “I’ll do my best to live up to your expectations.” Then he lifted a hand and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. His skin was warm, and she wanted nothing more than to tilt her head into his hand, but she refrained.
“Thank you for helping me today,” she told him. “I don’t know what I would’ve done if you hadn’t shown up.”
“I have no doubt whatsoever you would’ve made your way to the decon station and gotten yourself straightened out,” he said.
Jane wasn’t so sure about that, but it felt good that he had confidence in her. “I hope seeing me almost naked didn’t scar you for life.” She had no idea why she’d said such a thing. She’d decided earlier to pretend the nakedness had never happened. That Storm North hadn’t stripped her and held her close under the shower spray. But her mouth had an alarming habit of running away from her around this man.
His thumb brushed against the apple of her cheek as he said, “In the moment, I wasn’t thinking about anything other than washing that shit off of you so you could breathe again. I was in SEAL mode. But afterward, when I knew you were going to be all right, I couldn’t help but stare at you standing in front of me, soaking wet, wearing nothing but your underwear…and I have to say, I can’t remember anyone who’s turned me on more.”
Reminding herself that she was a mature woman, and not a blushing teenager, Jane said, “I’m not exactly young…and have the body to prove it.”
“Neither am I,” he countered. “And trust me…you’ve got a body made for lovin’. Your curves go on for days, and I’d consider myself a lucky man if you decided to share yourself with me in the future.”
She liked how he put that. “You aren’t too shabby yourself,” Jane felt compelled to say. “And you totally didn’t have to strip down, but…I appreciated it.”
They stared at each other for a long moment. Jane had no idea what he was thinking, but she loved the look of adoration she thought she saw in his eyes as he watched her.
“I should give you my number in case you need something overnight. If your eyes get worse or something.”
Jane nodded. “Okay.” She pulled her phone out of her purse, which had been brought to her by an officer, and programmed his number in when he recited it to her. Then she sent him a quick text. “There, now you have mine too.”
“Don’t forget to set your alarm to get up every few hours to rinse out your eyes,” Storm reminded her.
“I won’t.”
“If you feel sick or something seems off, don’t hesitate to call. I can take you back to the clinic.”
“I’ll be fine,” Jane told him.
“Even so,” he insisted.
“Okay, I’ll let you know.”
“See you in the morning,” Storm said.
Jane nodded and reached for the door handle. She climbed out, then stood awkwardly on the sidewalk in front of her apartment complex for a moment. She wasn’t in the least offended he hadn’t opened her door or walked her into the building. It was late, he’d gone out of his way to drive her home. She wasn’t about to put him out even more by making him park and walk her inside when she’d been doing it on her own for the last two decades.
But that didn’t mean she didn’t get all the feels when she turned around at the door to her building and saw that he hadn’t pulled away from the curb yet. That he was watching to make sure she made it inside safely.
She waved at him, and he gave her a chin lift in return. Only when she opened the door and went inside did he finally pull away from the curb and head home.
It felt good to take a shower in her own bathroom and use her own soap. She rinsed her eyes out once more, only wincing a little at the pain this time, and got ready for bed. Ignoring the way her stomach growled, Jane snuggled under her covers and clutched one of the eight pillows she kept on her bed to her chest.
The day had started like any other, then taken a horrible turn, but now, Jane felt almost giddy about tomorrow. She’d be slammed at work and would likely have to answer the same questions about how she was doing over and over, but nothing could dim her excitement.
Somehow, she’d scored a date with the Storm North. Her expectations might not match the fantasies she’d had about him for so long, but she wasn’t going to worry about that. She was going to enjoy the ride for as long as she was on it.