Chapter 82 Devora
Devora
My whole body was numb. Numb, yet still in pain.
I pressed the heel of my palm into my chest where I’d shoved the needle, slowly massaging it to try and take the ache away.
Every injury Scarven sustained in the fight lingered over me—the burn on my thumb, the claw marks on my chest, the bruise on my cheek.
The aftermath of the fatesprig made my entire body weak.
That pain had eaten me alive, burned me from the inside out as it ripped away my shadows.
I hadn’t felt them since. Everett promised me my magic would come back, but right now, it all seemed hopeless.
Like there wasn’t a point to drawing breath.
Everything hurt. Everything was wrong.
But nothing was more painful than watching him walk away.
Rose, Leo, Chaz, and Thecae had gone ahead into the village with the prisoners and those who had surrendered. They took Tessa with them, who was still passed out. The gradual draining of our magic had made her healing process slow even more.
The rest of the Ashen Order and I stayed as close to the property as we could risk to avoid the blast. They tried to convince me to go with the others since I was defenseless without my shadows, but they would’ve had to pry my dead body away.
A part of me still believed I’d see Nox appear from the rubble. That he’d come back to me. That he’d keep his promise.
“You must be the one he loves so much,” a voice said from behind me. I turned to see Vera twisting her fingers together, little sparks of lightning flying from them.
I thought I was, I wanted to say, but I didn’t have the heart or energy to respond.
“He was willing to die for you, you know,” Vera continued in her soft, sad voice. “To protect you against Scarven. It takes a lot to earn that kind of loyalty from my brother.”
I thought I nodded, but I wasn’t really sure if my head moved. I kept my eyes on the dirt at her feet as I croaked, “Doesn’t really matter now, does it?”
She paused for a moment. “I think it’s the only thing that matters. In the end.”
The end. Because that was what this was. An ending.
It was supposed to have been our beginning.
There was a rustle ahead, then Kieran and Arowyn’s aggravated voices caught my attention.
“—to do it. Before it’s too late,” Kieran was saying.
“Are you sure about this?”
Kieran grabbed Arowyn by the shoulders. For the first time since I met the man, his clothes were ruffled and dirty, his dark brown hair messy and tousled. “You know it’s the right thing.”
Before I could muster the strength to ask what was going on, they both vanished into thin air.
Vera and I shared a look, and she braced a hand on Everett’s arm. I eyed the two of them. Past me would’ve already asked a million questions about what in the world that was about. But right now—
The air shimmered, and Kieran and Arowyn came hurtling back through space.
Except…it wasn’t Kieran.
It was Nox.
All of us jumped in surprise, and my mouth dropped so hard, I thought it would hit the ground.
“Take me back there right now,” Nox snarled at Arowyn, his navy eyes turning to silver slits.
“What’s going on?” Everett asked.
The pieces clicked together, and I raised a shaking hand to my lips. Kieran had—he was—
“I’m going to wait for him,” Arowyn rushed out, backing away before Nox could grab her. “There’s still a chance, Nox. I’ll stay as long as I can.”
He lunged for her, but she was quicker. His arms wrapped around thin air. He let out a roar and swiped his fingers through his hair, then staggered toward the manor.
Fear lurched up my throat. I thought he was going to make a run for it. “Nox, don’t—”
But he didn’t run. He merely crashed to his knees with his hands splayed across his thighs. His neck dropped to his chest.
“He took my place,” Nox said, so quiet it was hard to hear. His sorrowful gaze met mine. “Kieran took my place.”
Tears pricked the backs of my eyes. Fates, I was so mad at him, I wanted to strangle him with or without my shadows. But I also loved him so much, I could hardly think straight. And he was about to watch his best friend die.
I lowered myself in front of him, and he instantly crushed me against him. His silent tears dripped down my neck as his fingers tangled in my hair. I melted into him, letting my own tears overwhelm me. Tears of relief, of disbelief, of love, of mourning.
“I’m so sorry, Devora,” he whispered into my hair, his voice choked. “I’m sorry I left you.”
I swallowed hard and clung to him tighter. “Shh, it doesn’t matter right now. I’ve got you. I’m here.”
When the first resounding boom shattered the quiet night, his body recoiled. I pulled back to grip his face and forced him to meet my eyes. “Just look at me. Right here. I’m with you, Nox.”
I could see the flames out of the corner of my eye as another explosion rocked the air.
Smoke rose in a mushroom cloud, hanging over the surrounding forest. Tears tracked down Nox’s dirt-stained cheeks, but he kept his sights set on me, his shoulders shaking and hands curling into fists where they held me.
I counted the seconds in my head. Each tick took me further and further from hope.
The blast was so strong, we could feel the heat even from this distance. Cracks echoed around us as the house succumbed to the fire and began breaking down on itself. The sky was blanketed in a smoky haze, blocking the stars and coating us in darkness.
A few more seconds passed. Nox closed his eyes, and the weight in my heart sank.
Until—
“Nox,” Vera said with a gasp. We both jerked toward her, then followed her finger pointing a little ways out.
Arowyn appeared on the ground, her hands blackened with ash as she crawled across the grass. Parts of her long hair were singed and smoking, soot covering her from head to toe. Fire had eaten through the sleeve of her right arm and burned the skin beneath.
Nox and I hurried to help her to her feet. When she doubled over with a cough, tufts of smoke spewed from her lips.
“I—I waited,” she said in between more coughing fits. “I waited as long as I could. I’m sorry, Nox.”
A lump formed in my throat. There was nothing more we could do.
Kieran was gone.
Nox threw his head back and roared into the sky, a deep, unending sound full of grief and heartache that made my own heart break even further.
I clutched a hand to my chest and looked out onto the collapsing mansion. The wind whipped my hair across my face and scattered the flames further into the forest. The snapping of limbs was a backdrop to Nox’s cry, and my own tears slipped freely down my face.
But then I saw something.
It was so brief, I thought I’d imagined it. I blinked and rubbed my eyes, then squinted.
My heart stopped.
“Nox,” I breathed out.
In the distance, rising through flame and ash, was a pair of white, glinting antlers.