Chapter 6
CHAPTER SIX
ELLIE
Hudson discards his clothes before his hands drag rough and calloused against my bare skin as they skim along my thighs and beneath me, grabbing my ass and scooping me into his arms as he effortlessly lifts me off the counter.
I whimper into his mouth while his lips continue to move ferociously against my own. Pulling back, I say through heavy breath, “You don’t need to carry me. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Are you trying to offend me, angel?” He laughs against my throat.
Stepping over the ledge of his walk-in shower, he presses me against the wall, and I tighten my thighs around his hips as he uses one hand to turn on the water, letting it cascade over us.
“You think I can’t easily slide this lush, perfect body into my arms and hold you the way you deserve?
You think I couldn’t bounce you up and down on my cock like this too? ”
I moan as his mouth drags along my jaw, and he nips at my shoulder, suckling my wet skin between his teeth while he lets out a groan that vibrates into my chest. “I…stand corrected.”
The water is warm, drenching us in a steam-hazed reality where this isn’t nearly as wrong I know it to be.
Hudson is unleashed, devouring my neck and throat like a starved man, like he’s wanted me for an impossibly long time and he’s finally cashing in on a prize he never thought he’d win.
For the second time today, I’m being ravished, cherished and adored, when this morning, I woke up feeling isolated and alone.
“Hudson,” I rasp, pulling his attention from my neck. He lifts his head, and a pair of hooded, ice-blue eyes sear through me. Droplets of water drip off his long lashes as he blinks at me, only feral desire present on his face. “We need to talk about this.”
He blinks again, and the lust seems to clear. He slowly lowers my feet to the floor before standing, though his hands don’t leave my body, staying firmly on my hips. “You’re right,” he says breathlessly. “I’m sorry.”
I shake my head. “Don’t be. I just…I think I’ve expelled all my courage for the day. I need to have a conversation before I have another orgasm, no matter how bad I may want it.”
“I get it.” He laughs into my neck. “How about this? Let’s shower, and afterward, I’ll order us take out from that Thai restaurant you love, and then we can eat and talk things out while we watch that reality show I know you like, yeah?”
He lifts a hand to cup my cheek, and I smile, nuzzling into it as I nod.
We don’t speak as he turns me in front of him so I face the shower head.
His touch is tender, careful, as he massages shampoo and then conditioner through my hair.
His hands are smooth when he rubs body wash into my skin, lingering as it rinses off.
His eyes roam with rapt focus as suds slide down my curves, falling to the floor and down the drain.
His cock is hard against my back where it presses into me, and part of me wishes I didn’t pump the breaks so soon.
There’s a low burning heat in his gaze, something that says he’ll be patient with me, but he won’t be soft once he finally has me. I bite back a chill beneath the warmth of the water, anticipation shooting through my core at that expression on his handsome face.
I watch his arm shoot out beneath my breasts, turning the handle to shut off the water, and his voice is a rough caress against my ear when he says, “I’ll grab you a towel.”
Breathless, I can only nod. He steps out, and a moment later, the soft fuzz of a bath towel wraps around my shoulders. He leads me out of the bathroom as I wrap my towel around myself.
“My bed or yours?” Hudson asks.
I scoff dramatically. “Um, yours?” His bed is huge, plush and soft. I imagine it’s much better than mine.
“Okay,” he chuckles, scratching his beard. “Go get some pajamas on, and I’ll order us food.”
I nod, nerves settling deep in my stomach as I pad out of his bedroom and into my own, throwing on the sweatpants and tank top I already had laid out to wear this evening. My backpack sits forgotten on the floor beside my bed—all my homework awaiting me.
I couldn’t have imagined this is how my day would go, no matter how bad I may have been secretly wishing for a situation exactly like this.
I don’t have a clue where we go from here.
I don’t know if it’s okay for me to cuddle up next to Hudson, to kiss or touch or fuck him without Nat present, even if they’ve been doing so behind my back.
I don’t know how to face Natalia after this. She doesn’t settle down, she doesn’t do more than a casual fling, but I don’t know if I can keep having sex with her if she’s still having sex with other people—outside of Hudson…I think? I’m not sure how to feel about any of it.
The possessiveness over my best friend and how to feel about the impending reality that she is much, much more to me than that is terrifying. Not to mention…the step-father of it all.
I mean…Hudson used to have sex with my mother. And while I’ve never seen him as a father-figure, merely a man who married my mom after I was an adult and living on my own, he was still married to her.
She was a monster to us both, and I don’t feel guilty in the slightest, but it’s weird…right?
I sigh. Yes, of course, it’s fucking weird. All of it’s weird.
Part of me wants to curl up and cry out of pure humiliation, but a larger part of me wishes I was as brave as Nat, that I could say to hell with the past and the expectations that come with it, demand what I wanted and take it for myself.
Before I can talk myself out of it, I walk back into Hudson’s bedroom to find him sitting on the edge of his bed in a pair of grey joggers, chest bare, running a hand through his dark hair as he scrolls through his phone.
His body is cut and muscular from his years as a professional athlete, but it’s also bruised and scarred. He’s a flawless dichotomy of hard and soft, rough and calm, comfort and chaos.
Suddenly, I don’t care much about weird or taboo. I just feel…fortunate.
When he hears me enter, he looks up, smiling as he slips his phone into his pocket and opens his arms to me. I get in beside him, pulling the comforter over my thighs as he wraps an arm around my shoulders.
“Food will be here in about forty-five minutes,” he says, chest vibrating under my ear as his fingers find their way through the strands of my wet hair. “Tell me how you’re feeling, angel.”
“I’m feeling like I don’t know what the rules are, and I wonder if I’m doing something wrong,” I admit.
“The rules are whatever we make them. It’s only wrong if you decide it is.”
“Have you ever done this before?” I ask, glancing up at him. “Been with two women?”
“Have I found myself slipping into bed with more than one person throughout the duration of my life? Yeah.” He laughs roughly. “Many times. But they were never people I cared about. Not the way I care about you.”
“What about Nat?”
“I care about her too.” He sighs. “You know she’s not…
built for traditional relationships. I think this comes easy for her.
She’s focused on what makes her feel good in life, and clearly, both of us do that for her.
I think she wants to make sure we’re okay with wherever this goes, and… I think I am. So, that leaves you.”
“I think I need to know where it goes before I can say for certain.”
He tilts his head, watching me intently with his glacial eyes, but he says nothing, as if waiting for me to continue.
“I liked seeing you two together, and I liked you watching us. I liked kissing you,” I murmur, cheeks heating. “But I don’t think I could stomach knowing either of you would be with someone outside the three of us. I’m not sure if that makes me selfish.”
“No, angel,” Hudson says. “You and Nat are both more than enough for me. I’m a fucking blessed man to be in this position. I won’t speak for Nat, but I am fucking content right now.”
An effortless smile springs to my lips, and I find myself curling into the warmth of his chest to hide it. “What about… I mean… We’d have to keep it a secret, right?”
“Yeah,” he resigns. “I could lose my job, and I don’t even want to begin to imagine your mother’s reaction if she were to see us right now.”
“Honestly, Hudson, I think I’d be content if neither of us ever saw my mother again. Her opinion is the least of my concerns, but your job is the most.”
“You’ve only got a year left of school, and I may have some other opportunities arise eventually. We can figure things out until then.”
“And in the meantime, we just…have sex?”
Hudson’s laugh is rich and smooth, his head tilting back as his throat moves with the sound leaving his lips.
Some kind of pride blooms in my chest at the sight of it.
“I’d very much like that, Ellie, but we can go at whatever pace you’re comfortable with.
We can also just do this…” He waves his hand, motioning to our current position.
“Other nights, we may be busy or have different schedules, and we may hardly see each other in passing. You may spend one-on-one time with Nat or vice-versa. We do what feels right for us, and if at any time it stops feeling right for us, we talk about it.” He grips my chin, lifting my head to meet his face. “Does that work for you, angel?”
Breathless, I only nod.
His smile is radiant as his hand moves from my chin to cup my cheek, and he lowers his mouth to mine. He kisses me slow and deep—savoring yet somehow languid, like he’ll have the rest of his life to move his lips against my own.
His touch turns exploratory, hands roaming over my curves. Noises leave me when he caresses my nipples, when he grips my thighs. He swallows them like he’ll remember them, like he’s tracking all the places he can feel me and studying the spots I like most.
I don’t know how long we kiss like that, slowly familiarizing ourselves with the other’s skin, but eventually, our food arrives.
We sit in bed watching television, laughing at the nonsense, and it’s easy, so easy with him.
Butterflies spread their wings inside my chest the same way they always have in his presence, expanding that familiar comfort Hudson gives me.
Even when he was married to my mother, the conversation between us was simple, the energy a safe hum, his smile a beacon home.
It’s then I wonder if he was ever supposed to have been with my mom; maybe instead, it was me he was drawn to. Maybe I’m his beacon too, and his wires got a little crossed. Whatever the reasons may be, I find myself incredibly grateful to be here with him now.
Hours later, I fall asleep in his arms, only stirring at the sound of muffled voices and shuffling feet.
After a moment, another warm body appears on my other side, curling itself into me.
Smooth, soft skin and graceful, long limbs tuck themselves between mine, the feel of her lips briefly against my cheek and the smell of the body wash I know she always uses covers me like an additional blanket of warmth.
I get the best sleep of my entire life.