Chapter 16
Willow wasn’t quite sure how to describe what she was feeling. She’d never been prone to whirlwind romances. But that was the only way to describe her time with Mel. They had spent the better part of two weeks together. But tonight was a big night. Tonight, Mel was going to meet all of Willow’s friends for a dinner party.
They had only recently put a label on themselves. Willow knew exactly how she felt about Mel by the pounding of her heart when her name was mentioned. She knew by the electric current that ran through her anytime Mel touched her.
Willow gave her reflection an appraising glance in the mirror. Her white t-shirt hugged snuggly over her breasts. She also wore her favorite black shorts along with white canvas shoes. Willow knew she looked great. She heard a tap on her bathroom door and opened it. Her Mom stepped inside and gave her a once over. Angela’s expression shifted slightly to one of disapproval.
“What?” Willow asked, a note of accusation clear in her tone.
“Nothing. You look great,” Angela said with a smile.
“Mom. Whatever it is you want to say, just say it. It’ll save us both time.”
“I just don’t understand why you’re spending so much time on this new girl. You should be finding Amy and trying to work things out with her. Two years is a long time. Don’t you think it warrants trying to fix things?”
“Amy left me, Mom. I didn’t leave. I’m in the same exact place I was when she left me. If she wanted to work something out, she could easily find me. But, to answer your question, no, I don’t think it warrants trying to fix things. If she had wanted to work things out Amy would have stayed. Clearly, she doesn’t want to work it out. Mel is the first woman I’ve dated since Amy. Things with her are going really well.”
Angela scrunched up her face. She was clearly not at peace with Willow’s answer. But Willow couldn’t concern herself with that now. Mel would be here any minute. From his dog bed Sushi watched her. There was a knock on her door, signaling Mel’s arrival. From his dog bed Sushi gave a tiny bark.
“Wish me luck, buddy,” Willow said with a chuckle. Sushi gave a wag of his tail.
“Mom, try to be nice to Mel. I’m hoping to keep her around for a long time.”
Angela plastered a smile on her face that wasn’t completely genuine. Willow supposed she was willing to accept the gesture. At least her mom was trying to make a good faith gesture. That’s more than she was expecting.
Willow opened the door and greeted Mel with a large smile. Willow caught Mel’s eyes sliding from her eyes to her breasts. The glance made Willow’s core heat, a preamble of what she hoped would come later that night.
“You look fantastic,” Mel said, trapping her lower lip between her teeth.
“You, too,” Willow smiled. She allowed her eyes to travel down Mel’s body and then back up again, meeting her eyes. Willow’s cheeks turned a deeper shade of pink.
Mel glanced past Willow and saw Angela. Willow noticed Mel straighten and widen her smile.
“I don’t think we’ve officially met. I’m Mel.” Mel offered an extended hand to Angela who took it.
““Yes, it’s very nice to meet you finally,” Angela said. She shot Willow an unmistakable look that questioned why Mel hadn’t come around to Willow’s place more. The truth was that Willow had enjoyed spending the bulk of her nights with Mel at her place. There was no way around the awkwardness of having her Angela living with her. Going over to Mel’s had just been easier.
“Absolutely,” Mel smiled.
“Mel what do you do for a living?” Angela asked still smiling.
“I manage a cafe in town,” Mel answered.
“That sounds fun,” Angela replied. Her tone was perfectly sweet, but Willow could read the subtext of her response. She didn’t consider Mel’s job to be serious enough.
“Well, we have to run,” Willow smiled.
“Of course. Will you be back home tonight?” Angela asked. Something about the question put Willow on edge.
“Sure. I’ll be home tonight.” Willow gave her mom a nod of the head before pushing Mel through the door and closing it behind her.
“Willow, your mom is going to think I’m so rude.”
“Oh, trust me she knows that was me and not you,” Willow grinned. She gave Mel a tiny poke in the sides, leading her towards the car.
“Okay. I want to get along with your mom though,” Mel insisted.
The statement made Willow a little sad. Angela had always been a little unaccepting of her girlfriends. Not for any reasons of prejudice but because no one would ever be good enough for her daughter. It would be sweet if it hadn’t pushed so many good people out of Willow’s life. Willow was determined not to let this happen with Mel.
Her friend, Piper, had an upscale condo overlooking the ocean. Piper who came from a wealthy family had always been rather tight lipped when it came to her background. Not that it mattered. Piper was one of the kindest most generous people Willow had ever met. Beside her in the car Mel twirled a brunette strand of hair around a finger.
“Everything okay?” Willow asked.
“I just hope your friends like me,” Mel admitted.
“My friends are going to love you,” Willow insisted.
“Sure. They’ll tell you they love me. But I want them to actually like me.”
“Trust me. If my friends don’t like you, they’ll tell me,” Willow said. Mel’s face turned to a grimace and Willow understood her mistake.
“But that won’t happen. Because you’re amazing! And you’re funny, smart, kind, and wildly attractive,” Willow smiled. She glanced over and caught a pretty pink blush spreading across Mel’s cheeks.
Willow knocked once on Piper’s door then pushed it open. Piper had a strict open-door policy for friends. Piper stood in the kitchen. She wore a black tank top with an oversized Hawaiian shirt. Willow thought it fit her friend’s bright and vibrant personality perfectly. Piper ran to Willow, her dark black hair flowing behind her. She wrapped her arms around Willow first before turning to hug Mel. Willow had always loved how Piper’s excitement for life shone in her bright blue eyes.
The next person to greet them was Autumn. Tonight, her blonde hair flowed freely.
“You must be Mel. River has told us so much about you.” Autumn shot Willow an accusatory glance that said she would be talking to Autumn about this new relationship soon.
“All good things I hope,” Mel laughed.
“Of course,” Autumn said. She led Mel to the kitchen where River was waiting. River gave Mel a tiny hug.
“It’s nice to see you again,” River smiled.
“It’s nice to see you, too.”
“I’m afraid that I’ve got way more food than we’re going to need. But everything is ready so let’s eat.” Piper gestured towards the table.
Willow noted that it was decorated about two levels fancier than was required. River who had never met a subtlety she didn’t want to proclaim made sure to comment on the fanciness.
“My goodness, Piper. We’re not important enough for you to bring out the good plates,” River teased.
“You, my friends, are the only people in my life who are worthy of the good plates,” Piper declared. River leaned over to give Piper a hug.
They sat, and it felt like home. Willow felt a smile tugging at the edges of her mouth. She glanced over and saw Mel talking to Piper. Everything about the moment felt natural, like Mel was meant to be there.
“Mel tell us about your family? Are you from around here?” Piper asked.
“Yes, I grew up here. My parents still live in town. Last year I bought my own place and moved out. I still go over to visit my folks. But we’ve always been really independent of one another. Even when I lived with them. They’ve always had their lives and I’ve had mine.”
“Must be nice,” Willow chuckled. The words escaped before Willow had a chance to think about them. Everyone at the table turned to look at her, except for River. At the end of the table River erupted into laughter.
Autumn and Piper had understandable expressions of confusion on their faces. River wiped tears from her eyes and took a deep breath.
“Her Mom moved in with her,” River explained between snickers.
“Oh Willow, no,” Piper said with a grimace.
Autumn gave a simple shake of her head.
“What? It isn’t like I could leave her out on the street,” Willow announced, suddenly defensive.
“We know,” Piper admitted reluctantly.
“It’s just that your life is never more unsettled than when Angela gets involved,” Autumn offered.
“I know. You guys aren’t wrong. But for what it’s worth, Mom has been on her best behavior. She hasn’t really tried to meddle much at all. Maybe she’s turning a corner.”
Willow saw the dubious expressions on her friend’s faces and laughed. She understood their hesitation. Her Mother had never been one to sit back as a casual observer. When it came to Willow’s life, Angela was either all in or all out. There had never been a healthy medium option where her mother was concerned.
After dinner she pulled each of her friends in for a hug. She was beyond grateful to have this group of women in her life. Willow watched as Mel also gave her friends hugs. Piper pulled Willow to the side and whispered in her ear.
“We really like this one. Good job,” Piper smiled.
“Thanks. I really like her too,” Willow admitted.
She and Mel rode in silence for a few minutes after leaving. Mel was the first to break the quiet.
“I like your friends. Tonight was so much fun,” Mel laughed.
“They liked you, too,” Willow said. She grabbed Mel’s hand and brought it to her lips.
“Really? Are you sure?”
“Yeah. That was the last thing Piper said to me before we left.”
“I’m so glad.” Mel squeezed her hand. Mel wanted her, and Willow could feel it. But in the moment, it wasn’t merely sexual.
“You know, my friends aren’t the only ones that are rather fond of you?” Willow said, her tone low.
“Oh, who else is rather fond of me?” Mel teased.
“I’m sure many people. But I. Well, I love you.” Willow said the words quickly before she could second guess them. Waiting for Mel’s response felt like it took a hundred years. In reality, Mel responded quickly, without hesitation.
“I love you, too.”
Willow knew that Mel wanted this thing between them to grow. Willow wanted the same thing. She opened her mouth to say something, but the words stopped in her throat. An unfamiliar car sat parked in her driveway. Mel met her eyes and arched her eyebrow, questioning.
“Mom must have invited someone over,” Willow suggested.
She walked into her home and heard laughing in the kitchen. There was a familiarity to the sound that Willow couldn’t place. She was about to bypass her mother and take Mel back to her room.
“Willow is that you?” Angela called out. Willow gave a silent curse under her breath. She mouthed an apology to Mel. Mel gave her a tiny smile and followed her to the kitchen.
“Sweetie, look who I found,” Angela announced proudly as Willow walked into the kitchen. Willow stopped dead in her tracks as her eyes fell on her mother’s guest. Amy sat across from Angela at the kitchen table.
Willow could feel the world spinning. Beside her Mel’s grip tightened on her hand. Her Mom was saying something, but Willow couldn’t make out the words. She began walking away.
“Willow, stop. Don’t you think we should talk?” Amy’s words cut through Willow’s fog like an arrow. Mel met her eyes with a questioning glance.
“Mel, meet Amy. My ex,” Willow gestured towards Amy. Mel’s eyes widened in realization. Her hand tightened even more around her own.
“Willow. We should talk. Alone.” Amy let her eyes slide to Mel. The gesture was not subtle, and Willow felt a heat rising inside of her.
“Mel, can I call you tomorrow? I just need to figure some things out,” Willow offered.
The way Mel’s eyes narrowed was a clear sign that Willow had made the wrong decision. But Mel gave her an obviously forced smile before turning to leave. Willow hated to watch Mel leave. Mel allowed the door to close loudly behind her. Willow sucked in a breath and turned to face Amy.
Amy stood with her arms folded, leaning casually with her back against the wall. Willow was struck with the realization that six long months ago this same sight would have prompted her to kiss the woman. Now it filled her with a mild vexation.
“What are you doing here, Amy?” Willow sighed. Amy looked at her confused.
“Your Mom found me and told me how much you missed me. So, I came over because…” Amy paused for a beat, she sighed loudly then continued.
“I came over because I miss you, too,” Amy said. Willow’s mind spun in a million different directions. This was clearly a conversation she and Amy would have to have tomorrow.
“Okay. I can’t have this talk tonight. Can you come back in the morning?” Willow asked. Her words came out more curt than she’d intended. A glance at Amy’s face told Willow that she was taken aback by her tone.
“I should be able to come over tomorrow morning. Is ten, okay?” Amy asked.
“Sure. Ten should be fine.”
Willow walked Amy to the door to see her out. She was surprised when Amy turned and lay a hand against her cheek.
“I really have missed you,” Amy insisted. Willow pulled her face away.
“I’ll see you in the morning.” Willow closed the door and turned to find her mother in the living room, watching her.
“Why send Amy away?” Angela asked. It was the genuine confusion that got to Willow.
“What on Earth were you thinking inviting Amy here? After everything that I’ve been through trying to move on over the last six months.
“I thought you’d be happy,” Angela said defensively.
“Why would you think that? What have I said that led you to that conclusion? I’m dating Mel. I’m in love with Mel.”
“But you still miss Amy.” Her Mom’s words stung, in part because they were true.
“I’m moving on. It takes time and it’s painful. But I’m making plans with a new person. I’m in love with Mel.” Willow hated the pain in her own voice.
“Why?”
“Why, what?”
“What makes this Mel person so special? Amy is accomplished and successful,” Angela said.
“She also left me without a single conversation,” Willow demanded. She threw her arms in the air.
“She’s here now.”
“Now it’s too late.”
Her Mom gave a weary sigh. Willow had seen her mom do the same thing since childhood. Angela pinched the bridge of her nose.
“Mel seems like a nice girl. I know you like her. I’m just asking you to consider both of your options,” Angela stated. From his dog bed Sushi gave a groan. He didn’t like the raised voices.
“I’m going to bed,” Willow announced.
“Come on, Sushi,” Willow commanded. Sushi gave a long stretch then followed her to the bedroom.
As soon as the door closed Willow’s weariness hit her like a ton of bricks. The night had started out so perfectly. Why had her mom felt compelled to ruin it? Because this was their pattern. Willow would pick something. But if what she picked wasn’t up to Angela’s standards, she would insert herself into Willow’s life. Here she was a grown woman, still struggling with her mom’s interference. Tomorrow, she’d see Amy again. Tonight, she needed to text Mel. She desperately wanted to smooth things over with the woman.
Willow stared down at her phone, unsure of what to text. Instead, she found her fingers hitting the call button. It felt like the phone rang for a long time before Mel answered. Longer than usual.
“Hello.” Mel’s voice sounded stiff to Willow’s ears.
“Hey, I’m so sorry about tonight,” Willow said apologetically.
“What did you and Amy talk about?” Mel asked, her voice lacked its usual warmth.
“She wants to get back together.” Willow knew that even though it was difficult, honesty was the best policy.
“What do you want?” Mel’s tone took on an unfamiliar note, concern or resignation maybe.
“I don’t know what I want. I just know that I need to talk things out with her.” Her words came out more of a whisper than she’d intended.
“I don’t understand. You just told me you were falling in love with me,” Mel protested. Willow felt her heart crack a little.
“I do love you. I just need to see this through. For closure if nothing else,” Willow explained.
“I do understand the need for closure. I think it’s best if we take a break while you figure out your situation. Now if you want to explore things with Amy, you’re free to do so.” Mel’s words were emotionless, but Willow knew that was a cover. A disguise that Mel used to cover what she was actually feeling.
“Okay. If that’s what you want,” Willow managed to make her words sound bold and confident.
“No, Willow. This isn’t what I want. None of this is what I want. But if you need figure some things out about your feelings towards Amy, I won’t stand in your way.”
Mel was being more than fair, and Willow knew that.
“Thank you.” It was the only thing left to say. Mel hung up without saying goodbye. The ringtone was harsh in Willow’s ears.
Mel was right down the street, but she may as well have been a hundred miles away. Willow knew that she had put distance in their relationship. She hated herself for that. But if she didn’t give herself the opportunity for closure with Amy, she would always have questions. Willow had her doubts that she would be able to sleep. But Willow closed her eyes and remembered how it felt to hold Mel in her arms. It was a struggle but after a few hours Willow fell into a fitful sleep.