26. Prom Perfection
CELESTE
The ladiesfrom the salon were some of the sweetest people I had ever met. They reminded me of butterflies with how they fluttered around me as they fawned over my hair and makeup. Each one gave me step by step instructions on how to properly care for my hair type as well as how to properly do makeup with my skin tone. I had never had so much attention before and as cliché as it sounded, I truly felt like a princess. All of the products they used were included in the fee Wesley paid them because of course they were. Wesley always thought of everything.
Picking out my dress was much more difficult than I imagined, primarily because of the lump in my throat. More than anything, I longed for Mama to be here to tell me what color would look best or which neckline was appropriate. In some ways it almost seemed like a waste of time because no matter what dress I put on, Wes would tell me I was the prettiest girl in the room. I wanted to really knock him off his rocker, a gown that had a real “wow” factor.
In the end, the personal shopper from Saks who brought the dresses was helpful in identifying not only the style I preferred but the appropriate cut for my body type. There were matching shoes for every option, too, so I didn’t need to agonize over footwear. Daddy hummed with approval when I stepped out wearing a pale blue gown with ruffles on the A-Line skirt. There was glitter along the bodice that shimmered as I moved. My hair was twisted and curled into an elegant bun on the back of my head, with soft curls that dangled around my face. A headband of the same glittery blue had been woven into my tresses to add a bit more sparkle.
The heels might match the dress perfectly, but they were far too tall and made me feel like I was walking on a tightrope. I had no intention of keeping them on all night, but there wasn’t enough time to properly hem all of the ruffles in the dress I selected so I had to make due with them. At least I could get a photo with Wesley where he didn’t tower over me for once.
The final result was rather stunning, I was reluctant to admit. I didn’t recognize myself in the mirror, but then again, I hadn’t been able to do that for several months. All the makeup helped put some color back on my cheeks and erased the permanent crease in my forehead from all the frowning I sported nowadays.
Marla and Nana joined Daddy while I was getting ready and all three of them had tears freely flowing when I exited the bathroom. Marla clapped her hands in delight.
“Sugar bee, you are gonna take that boy’s breath away,” Daddy sputtered.
Nana nodded in agreement. “You look just like your mama.” She lost control then, bursting into a crying fit that nearly bowled her over. Marla wrapped an arm around her, swiping the tears from her cheeks and smiling.
“Come on, y’all can’t make me cry after all the work they put into makin’ me look like this!” I cried. Now I finally understood why those silly pageant girls always waved their hands over their faces when they won.
Willow came back into the room with two male nurses and explained they were going to help Daddy shower and get ready so he could go upstairs with me. While he looked frail climbing out of bed and needed the nurses’ help to stand upright, he was able to walk into the bathroom with them without much assistance. It buoyed my spirits tremendously.
“Now let’s get a few pictures before Wesley gets here!” Marla exclaimed. “Trust me, someday you’ll have a daughter who will want to see your prom dress!” She winked at me.
By the time I got done modeling my gown, then taking pictures with her and Nana on her cell phone, Daddy was showered and in clean clothes. He even donned a button up shirt with a clip on bow tie for the occasion. Marla whispered that his goal was to stay out of his wheelchair for as much of the night as he could.
A loud knock on the door interrupted the conversation and Marla squealed with delight. “That’ll be Wesley!” She rushed to answer the door.
More tears streamed down her cheeks as she came back around the corner, this time with Wesley close behind. Forget my outfit—Wesley in a crisp black tuxedo with black satin lapels and a black satin pocket square should be the outfit of dreams. The effect was dazzling since the jacket was clearly tailored to fit every muscular contour on his body. For once, his shaggy scruff was slicked back away from his face except for one stray curl that fell down just into his eyes. My favorite megawatt smile was in full force, and I idly wondered if the blue of my gown now looked frumpy in comparison to the bright cobalt of his eyes. He was magnificent, my prince charming here to take me to the ball.
Judging by the way he stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of me, however, the feeling was mutual. Wesley slowly let his gaze start at my feet and wind slowly, seductively up my body, lingering just a fraction more on my hips, then my breasts, before finally settling on my face. The heat from his gaze made my skin tingle, and I knew I had to be blushing redder than a tomato. If my family noticed, they didn’t comment.
Nana let out a wolf’s whistle. “You sure shine up like a new penny!” she commented.
“Give her the corsage, Wes! Go on!” Marla urged. Her cell phone had become a permanent fixture in her hand, taking photos of every second of the process.
Wesley grinned sheepishly at me as he pulled out a plastic box holding a corsage made of white orchids and calla lilies out from behind his back. His fingertips caressed my wrist as he slid it on, the fire in his eyes telling me just how much he was affected by my attire.
“You’re perfect,” he breathed, barely loud enough for me to hear.
I shook my head slightly, still dazed by how incredible he looked. The long diamond earrings dangling from my ears swayed. “Not hardly.”
Gingerly, he tilted my head up with his fingers so I couldn’t hide from him. “For my whole life.”
Warmth coated my insides and my knees quaked. This boy would be my undoing.
“Now it’s not prom night unless we get three dozen pictures in, y’all, so get over here and pose!” Nana interrupted. Thank goodness, or I would have been lost in the depths behind Wesley’s eyes.
How Marla managed to have any storage left on her phone from all the photos was beyond me, but when she finally deemed them enough, Daddy and Wesley escorted me upstairs. Daddy stayed in his wheelchair with Willow and one of the male nurses present. Willow assured us that she would try to remain as inconspicuous as possible for the duration of the party.
“Don’t be silly,” Wesley replied easily. “You should enjoy tonight just as much as the rest of us. You worked hard to pull this off.” All the while his fingers remained tightly intertwined with mine.
I was rendered speechless when we arrived on the top floor by the grandeur of the event and the number of guests in attendance. There were more than thirty people out on the dance floor, some wearing masks or tubes for oxygen, and several more were seated at tables around the room. A professional photographer encouraged one girl to smile next to a four foot tall seahorse and two boxes that read “Under the Sea: Emory Hospital Prom” with the year. And although I had little experience in the matter, I would hazard to guess that the DJ behind the turntable was an honest to goodness professional. Sea creatures made out of glitter and paper maché were scattered throughout the room along with a mural of ocean life on a banner hung behind all the food tables.
The biggest giveaway that this was a hospital prom and not a real one was the number of nurses in scrubs and doctors in white lab coats that stood around the perimeter. Everyone was smiling, however, talking animatedly and laughing. Some were even dancing with patients. It melted my heart like ice cream in July to see so many sick kids happy. Wesley changed all of their lives and probably didn’t even realize the impact it made.
“May I have this dance?” Wesley asked sweetly, pulling our joined hands up to his mouth to softly kiss my knuckles.
We weaved in between the other dancers as Tim McGraw’s “One of Those Nights” came on the speakers. Aware of my daddy’s eyes drilling into the back of my head, I kept Wes an arm’s length away from my body. He glanced my daddy’s way and chuckled, but maintained the distance.
It was the perfect night and the perfect prom, better than I had ever imagined a school dance could be. I was so grateful not to deal with Hillary and her groupies, who surely would have crashed my good time had we been back in River’s Run. Daddy smiled and laughed the whole time, talking with Willow, the hospital staff, and other patients. He even took photos with Wes and me at the photographer’s set up where he managed to stand upright rather than sit in his wheelchair. Other than his smaller frame, no one could look at that photo and guess that he was sick. I already knew that silly photo at “Prom Do-Over” as Wes called it was one of my most prized possessions.
I saw Willow steer Daddy’s wheelchair over to the DJ. They spoke briefly to him for a moment before Daddy grinned and came over towards the dance floor. As the song changed, Daddy stood out of his chair to join us.
“Sorry, son, but this one is for Celeste and me,” Daddy said. Wesley smiled and nodded, stepping over to the side to watch us. I recognized the open chords to Heartland’s “I Loved Her First” and it was impossible not to cry again. Mama and I always talked about playing this song at my wedding back when I was a little girl who dreamed of her big day. Daddy’s arms came around my shoulders as mine wrapped around his waist in what was more of a hug than a dance. We slowly turned in circles with his head resting on the top of my hair as the song sang about a father watching his daughter move on with the love of her life.
The impact of his cancer stabbed me in the chest yet again as I realized Daddy wanted this dance with me now because he would never have it at my wedding. Even though he couldn’t be there when the time came, it didn’t mean I couldn’t have the father-daughter dance I deserved.
I had to wonder if Daddy was also crying because his voice sounded thick and gravelly when he said, “Wes is growing into a good man, sugar bee. Might need to get his temper under control so his fists stop doin’ all the talkin,’ but I’m proud as hell of him. I hope you know that.”
A watery chuckle broke loose. “Yeah, he’s been more than good to us, Daddy. We’re lucky I met him at the creek that day.”
He nodded against my hair. “I’m proud of you, too, sugar bee. You have your mama’s heart, but it’s so much more than that. I can’t believe the young lady you’ve turned into. I’m so grateful for every second of this life I spent as your daddy. D’you hear me? I wouldn’t trade a single minute of it.”
We were both openly crying now, there was no way around it. I ceased spinning and instead pulled away enough to look Daddy in the eye through my tears. The crinkles around his eyes were just the same as I remembered, his smile warm even while tinged with sadness.
“I just want you to always know that you were my greatest blessing, okay?” Daddy whispered thickly. “No matter what happens down the road, it was and has always been you, sugar bee. I love you, Celeste.”
Sobs were choking me now, everything so blurry through my tears that I could no longer see. I crushed myself against Daddy’s chest and managed to blubber out, “I love you more than anything, Daddy.” I felt a gentle hand on the middle of my back and knew without looking that Wesley had stepped forward to console me. His soothing presence wrapped around me like a blanket, even with my father right there.
“You just remember your promise to me, Wesley,” Daddy said.
“For my whole life, sir,” he replied.
Exhaling sharply, I turned to look at Wes, smearing makeup all over my face as I scanned his features. He gave me a reassuring smile. The word choice was definitely intentional.
“Well, now, I didn’t mean to ruin your evening, kids,” Daddy coughed and took a few steps back, hastily wiping his eyes as he settled into the wheelchair Willow pushed forward. “If it’s all the same to you, I’d like to go rest in my room. Enjoy yourselves.”
As they navigated through the other prom goers, Wesley laced his hand through mine. “Wanna get some air?” he offered kindly.
Considering I was still a wailing mess? Absolutely.
There was hardly anyone out on the terrace now that the temperature dropped. I reminded myself that it probably wasn’t safe for any of the patients to be outside when there was a chill in the air. Too many brightly lit skyscrapers meant stars were nearly impossible to see here in Atlanta, a feat that surprised me the first time Wesley pointed it out, but now as I looked up at the sky I felt a surge of pity for the city’s inhabitants. They were missing so much beauty and they didn’t even know it.
Wesley came to stand behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. “We decided not to name a prom king or queen since it wouldn’t be fair to all of the kids in there, but you’re prom queen in my book,” he whispered. Laughing, I shook my head at how foolishly insignificant something like a prom queen felt at that moment.
I wasn’t sure how long we stood like that, quietly enjoying each other’s company and lost in thought. It felt like quite some time had passed by the time I finally came back to the present.
I smiled. “Can we leave yet? I think all this crying has tuckered me out.”
“Of course, lovebug. Anything you want.”
“Let’s just pop back in and say good night to my daddy, okay?”
We wove back through the dancers, hand in hand, and took the elevator down to the next floor. It sounded like someone was howling when I stepped across the threshold of Daddy’s room, however.
We both raced down the short hallway into his room and found Nana bawling her eyes out, rocking forcefully on the couch, with Marla trying to comfort her. Silent tears ran down Marla’s face, too, and my heart bottomed out of my chest.
“Where’s Daddy?” I demanded.
My question made Nana wail louder.
It was Marla who answered, though. “He had another one of his seizures shortly after he got back,” she whispered. “It was a really bad one, so Willow called for Dr. Hassan. An alarm started going off that his heart was in distress and the doctor said they needed to get him into surgery immediately. They wheeled him out about an hour ago.”
Numb. My whole body went numb.
I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t hear, couldn’t even think. Why hadn’t I come back down here with him? How could this happen when he had been feeling so good all day?
“Desiree’s on her way,” Marla added, her voice low.
“How long will he be in surgery?” Wesley asked.
“We don’t really know just yet,” Marla replied. “Everything happened in such a rush, with all kinds of beepers and things goin’ off. Couldn’t even really understand what they were saying. Willow said she would come back soon with an update for us.”
Wesley nodded before gently guiding me onto the couch next to Nana. As soon as I sat down, I instinctively wrapped my arms around her and continued soothing her the way Marla had been.
It might as well have been lifetimes that passed while we waited in that position. There was never a way to accurately describe how time flows while you’re waiting in crisis. It was just different, an experience I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. The perpetual waiting, with different scenarios running on repeat in your head, was enough to make you go crazy. So you just wait a little more. It was all you can do.
Nana’s sobs eventually quieted enough that her body was no longer shaking, but the three of us stayed clustered together on the sofa. Wesley stood on my other side, as frozen as a statue. A piece of my heart actually broke as though there was a permanent change to my internal structure. Fear that deep in your core will do that to a person.
None of us reacted when Desiree, Hillary, and Jeremy stormed inside. Hillary was wearing a blood red silk dress that showed more of her boobs than I would have thought acceptable at a school dance. Somewhere in the back of my mind the old Celeste scoffed at the idea that I was going to be the one with the bad reputation, but the new, heartbroken version no longer cared.
Desiree was also dressed up in a frilly cocktail dress and sky high stilettos as though she had been chaperoning the prom back in River’s Run. For once, she didn’t say a word to anyone other than to ask if we had any news. When Marla shook her head, Desiree simply began to pace back and forth across the room. The clacks of her heels became my metronome, and I zeroed in on the sound to keep myself focused on something rather than the sheer terror that solidified in my chest.
By the time Willow came in, I was semi-certain I had gone stark raving mad. My mind had become a loop of regrets, cycling through all of the things I should have done differently, all of the ways I should have taken better care of my dad, all of the moments I missed because I was too selfish to stay with him. Did school really matter that much in the grand scheme of things? It was so much wasted time that could have been spent up here with Daddy…and now I realized how fleeting all of that time was.
“Dr. Hassan assessed Mr. Hendricks’ condition and felt the tumor removal can no longer wait. He is going to remove as much as he can while the cardio surgeon monitors Mr. Hendricks’ heart…it looks like he had a mild heart attack tonight in conjunction with the seizure. I will keep you updated, but honestly, Dr. Hassan and his team expect this surgery to last more than eighteen hours. It’s extraordinarily complex and they need to take their time. You may want to try and get some rest.” She added that last sentence half-heartedly, likely knowing how tall an order her suggestion was. Willow nodded to Desiree before leaving the room.
Marla sighed, and I felt the weight of the world on her exhale. We were all suffering from the kind of exhaustion that takes root in your soul. “Welp, you heard the woman. We are gonna go and try to get some sleep while we wait.”
Nana seemed to be out of it, standing up on autopilot without really seeing the world around her. Marla continued to hold her with one arm around her shoulder.
“Yes, I think we’ll return to the hotel and change out of these clothes,” Desiree said. She gestured to Hillary and Jeremy to follow them out the door.
Only I was left sitting on the couch, unable to move. It no longer felt like I actually resided in my body. I didn’t know where to go or what to do.
Wesley knelt in front of me, gently cupping my face with both his hands as he scanned my eyes. He didn’t say a word, for which I was grateful as I was no longer capable of speech, but he also wasn’t going to leave us there. This time rather than throwing me over his shoulder, Wesley scooped me up with one hand behind my back and another under my knees, carrying me across the threshold like a married couple. I let him because that was easier than thinking. As carefully as I could, I burrowed into his chest, recognizing on a subconscious level that my body was trembling but not giving two shits about it.
I couldn’t remember how I got there, but somehow I found myself in Wesley’s cavernous bathroom. A small voice in my head hoped that Mr. Madden wasn’t there because there was no way he had forgotten his earlier statement of me being unwelcome, but I was also too dazed to care. Wes was gentle and kept his eyes on my face as he reached around to unzip my dress, letting it cascade in its ruffled glory on the floor. The dress had a built-in corset, so I didn’t have a bra on, but he tenderly pulled my panties down next.
Hot steam billowed out from the glass shower as he pushed me inside. Wes made quick work of removing his own clothing, leaving them in a rumpled pile on the floor. He joined me in the shower, placing me just under enough of the water that I received the heat. My body finally stopped shaking. Methodically, he removed the bobby pins and headband from my hair until it all finally dropped loosely down my back. Only then did he direct me under the water, tipping my head back to let everything wash away. He grabbed my loofah from its place on the wall and began gently scrubbing my body. The whole time his blue eyes stayed trained on my face, watching every reaction I had.
Except, I had nothing to give him. All the makeup and hair spray and other remnants of the night streaked down my skin as I prayed to a god I didn’t believe in to wash me away right with it. I didn’t want to live in a world without either of my parents.
The inability to move continued, and once Wesley washed my body and hair, never once lingering longer on one body part versus another, he scooped me back up into a bride’s hold and took me to his bed. We were both naked as he tucked the heavy duvet around us, but I couldn’t register the feeling of his skin against mine. He wrapped his entire body around me, legs and all, until the safety and warmth of his Wesley cocoon broke me.
Floodgates unleashed within me, more tears and pain than I thought possible. There was no way the human body could withstand the onslaught of grief I experienced. I welcomed the darkness, wanted to dive in with open arms, if it meant I no longer had to operate without my daddy here. A doctor was cutting into his brain like the meat back at the diner, and I found myself desperately wishing I could trade places with him. My daddy deserved to live, and if God needed a sacrifice, he could take me instead.
Wesley held me the entire time, gently humming a tuneless song that nonetheless made me aware of his presence. His grip remained tight as if he knew that any slack would mean I utterly shattered. It was the only thing that grounded me enough to maintain a sense of reality. My soul was already moving on to the next life where it could join my parents.