Chapter 16
Sunday, I followed him to the door, waiting until Roxanne answered. The rest of the visit had gone well, with no more outbursts. Josh was friendly and helped clean up after dinner. This morning, it had been fun to share breakfast with him. To see him when he first woke up. It reminded me of when he was young, his hair tousled, a sleepy smile on his face as he said good morning. The way he leaned into Cherry as she hugged him, as if seeking her embrace. It made my heart swell with hope for the future.
I was pleased when Josh high-fived me, then hugged me before he went inside. It was fast, and he was gone before I could return the gesture, but it was huge. Roxanne turned to go, but I halted her. “Wait.”
Roxanne stared at me balefully. “What?”
“We need to talk.”
She stepped out, her shoulders back, ready for a fight. “What?”
“Stop filling his head with lies. I never walked away, and I’m not walking away this time. I want him in my life. You trying to sabotage it only makes you look bad. And your boyfriend. Tell him to stop raising his voice to Josh. He hates it.”
She laughed. “You are so typical. You have no right to tell me how to raise my son. I?—”
“Our son. Josh is our son, so it gives me the right.”
“You think it’s easy? Raising him?” She stepped closer. “What are your plans, Dominic? Play dad every weekend, holidays, and leave me with the rest? Make me the scapegoat for the weeks and responsible for everything else? Getting him to school, meeting with teachers, dressing and feeding him? And you get to be the fun one, having sleepovers and eating out?”
“I want him more than weekends.”
She scoffed. “And how is that going to work? You live an hour away. You gonna drive him here to school every day? Pick him up? Take him to appointments? He isn’t going to be living half time with you and half time with me and going to two schools, having two different lives. Have you thought about that?”
I had to admit, I hadn’t thought that far ahead. I studied her, noting she looked tired. Not tired as in she didn’t sleep well the night before, but weary. I took a deep breath and spoke calmly.
“Are you okay, Roxanne?”
My question surprised her, but she snapped back. “I’m fine.”
“Surely we can come to a compromise where Josh gets the best of both of us, Roxanne. If we put him first and work together?—”
She rolled her eyes and cut me off. “I’m not interested in playing friends with you. And I’m not moving to help you. You want him more? You change your life and prove how important he is.”
Then she walked in and slammed the door.
Leaving me confused, worried, and upset.
With one huge question on my mind.
How was I going to do this?
Dom was quiet when he got back from dropping off Josh. I’d expected him to be talkative and want to discuss how the weekend went. Instead, he stared out the window, paced the floor, and didn’t say much except Josh was home safely.
“Roxanne looked really tired,” he mused. “I texted Josh and told him to be nice to her.”
“That was kind.”
He shrugged. “Not sure why I did that.”
“Because you’re a good man.”
He didn’t reply, and he had been silent ever since.
“Dom,” I began, waiting until he looked away from the window. “What is it?”
He sighed and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his thighs. “What am I going to do, Cherry?”
“About?”
“Going forward. I want Josh more. But how will that work? Me here, him there. He has a life, school. He can’t live here part time and there part time.”
“No, he can’t.” I paused. “But, Dom, you’re jumping the gun a little, aren’t you? You’ve only had him one weekend. Wait and see what happens.”
Dom tapped his foot on the floor, the movement uneven and jerky. “I get the feeling he’s lonely at times.”
“He is, I think. It sounds as if his mom is a bit overbearing.”
He snorted. “That’s an understatement.”
I regarded him fondly, reaching over and taking his hand. “Dom, I know you’re a cut-to-the-chase kind of guy. You like action.” I winked, trying to make him smile. “I should call you my bulldozer.”
He huffed a little annoyed noise.
“But you need to take your time with this problem. Josh and his custody isn’t going to happen overnight.”
“I want to see more of him.”
“I know. So talk to Halton and make a plan. But you can’t expect it to happen immediately.”
He sighed, shutting his eyes.
“Maybe we moved too fast,” I said quietly.
“What?”
“If I weren’t around, and we hadn’t bought a house, you could move. Find a different job. See Josh easily.”
He gaped at me. “Don’t finish that.”
“It’s true.” I drew in a deep breath. “We could simply put the house back up on the market. I could go live with Hannah for a bit. Or the apartment over the garage. You could go be with Josh.”
“Not happening.”
“Think about it, Dom. Without me in the picture, the solution would be so much easier.”
He gripped my hand. “Without you, there is no solution. I love you, Cherry.”
“He’s your son.”
He stared at me. “Would you leave me if the roles were reversed? If leaving me meant you could see Hannah more?”
“I would certainly give it consideration. And you should too.”
“No. I refuse to believe there isn’t a solution to this where I get both of you.”
I stood, bending and kissing his forehead. He gripped my hips, stopping me from leaving. I cupped his face, fighting back my tears. “You have to consider it, Dom.”
“I can’t lose you.”
“Your son is forever.”
“So are we. If you want to sell the house, then you can come with me.”
“Then I have to leave Hannah.”
He stared at me. “So, we have to lose everything for our kids?”
“Maybe not. But if you chose Josh, I would understand.” I smiled, even though I wanted to cry. “I’m going for a bath. I have a headache.”
I walked away, glancing over my shoulder. Dom sat with his head down as if the weight of the world was on his shoulders.
I knew how he felt.
Halton fit me in, and I sat across from him, telling him everything that had happened. What Cherry had said. What I was feeling. He listened, not interrupting. When I was done, he rested his chin on his steepled fingers, regarding me.
“Okay, first thing—Cherry is right. You’re rushing here. You’ve had one sleepover. This will take time. Second, you’re right. You can’t have him half the time and divide his life between two cities. It’s not fair to him, and no judge would grant that.”
“So, I have to move if I want more custody?”
Halton was silent for a minute. “Where is Cherry, Dom?”
“She didn’t want to come. She wants me to make this decision on my own. She says not to figure her into the equation.”
He lifted his eyebrows. “Incredibly brave of her.”
“I feel as if I’m already losing her.”
“Not if you sit back and look at this rationally. With your head, not your heart.”
“Explain that to me.”
“Move ahead with your life. Let Josh be part of it. We’ll request extended visits, but nothing that causes Josh upheaval.”
“Such as?”
“You get him Friday evening until Monday morning. You pick him up after school and have him back there on Monday. You get three nights, two days. An extra day on long weekends.” He met my gaze. “That’s way more than you had before.”
He was right. It was.
“You get to attend parent-teacher meetings. Go to school events. You make him a priority, not your entire life.”
“What if he wants to live with me? I read a case recently?—”
Halton held up his hand. “I know. That was the States. Canada’s laws are different. A child is considered a minor until eighteen. He can’t choose to live with you if his mother doesn’t agree.”
“Damn.”
Halton chuckled. “Cherry was right about something else. You are a bulldozer.”
I had to laugh. “I suppose.” Then I grew serious. “I don’t want to lose either of them, Halton.”
“Then listen to me. Give this a little time. I’ll put together a proposal to ask for more visitation. Request another meeting and present it to the judge. But not immediately. You still have to prove to him you’re reliable. So we have to give it some time. You have to understand that.”
I didn’t argue, because I knew he was right. I knew Cherry was right. I was rushing everything.
“I know. I was…” I shrugged, lost for words.
“You were acting like a father who has missed his child. I get it, Dom. We’ll do this correctly and by the book. Work with the system. Show the judge how cooperative you’re being. How happy Josh is with you in his life.” He sighed, rubbing his eyes. “But prepare yourself for Roxanne to fight. We’ll fight back. The fact that he is doing better in school because of Cherry and her math teaching? That is gold. Keep that up.”
I blew out a long breath, my chest loosening. Halton was right. I was jumping too far ahead. I had let my emotions get the best of me.
“Okay. I’ll let you do your thing, and I’ll keep going forward with my life and Cherry. Adding Josh to it, not letting that take over.”
He nodded in agreement. “Yes. And get some sleep. You look like death warmed over. Go to Littleburn and talk to Cherry. Take her to dinner, talk to her, then take her home and reassure her.” He winked drolly. “This must be hurting her as well.”
I hadn’t slept the night before, and Cherry had avoided me at the garage all morning. She looked as tired as I felt. When I’d told her about meeting with Halton, she had nodded but refused to accompany me. Her words “take me out of the equation,” echoed in my head the entire drive in.
That was unacceptable. She was the constant in the entire equation. The equalizer. I needed her, even more than I realized.
“I will.”
I found Cherry at the garage. It was late, but she was at the desk, her head bent over, studying a form. She had her air cast off, resting her arm on a pillow. Her lips moved as she read soundlessly, her glasses perched on the end of her nose. She looked pale, but still so beautiful, it made my chest ache. The thought of losing her caused a pain I knew I wouldn’t ever recover from.
I knocked on the doorframe, and she looked up. “Oh. Hi.”
I walked in and shut the door behind me. I pulled out the flowers from behind my back and handed them to her. Her eyes widened, and I bent, cupping her face. I kissed her, sliding my tongue in and twisting it with hers. She tasted of coffee and chocolate, and I knew she’d been nibbling. It was another one of her nervous habits.
I pulled back, resting my forehead on hers. “I’m sorry, baby. I wasn’t listening. You were right.”
“I was?”
“Yes. And it’s you and me, Cherry. We’re together, and nothing is changing that, you understand?” I stood straighter, holding her cheeks. “I love you. I need you. You are my world, and we’ll figure out Josh and how we all fit together, as a family. We’ll do that together. You hear me?”
Her eyes filled with tears. “Yes.”
“Then let’s go home. I need you alone so I can show you how much I love you. And I have to feed you.”
“In that order?”
“Whatever order you want, as long as we’re together.”
“Okay then, Dom. Take me home.”
“Let’s go.”