Chapter Forty-One
CHRISTMAS DAY
JENNA
Tommy
I’m about to leave my place. Just finished cleaning ahead of Mom arriving tomorrow.
Me
There is literally nothing left to clean. Your entire apartment squeaks when you touch any surface.
Tommy
Want to know something about your new boyfriend?
Me
Um, yes. Always.
Tommy
I clean when I’m nervous.
Me
So, you’re nervous all the time?
Tommy
You know I’m rarely nervous. But when I am, the cleaning increases. It’s like my own version of ASMR or something. It’s therapeutic. Controlling.
Me
Well, in that case, can you be nervous more often when you’re at my place?
Tommy
Oh, I will be. In around a half hour when I walk through your door and come face-to-face with your six-foot-five brother.
Me
You realize you are also that tall?
Tommy
True. I can take him.
Me
DO NOT PUNCH MY brOTHER.
AGAIN.
Tommy
Was the timing of my joke still a bit too soon?
Me
It will never be appropriate.
Tommy
But what if he punches me when he finds out his archnemesis is dating his baby sister?
Me
Holt doesn’t have enemies.
Tommy
He really is the golden boy of rugby, isn’t he?
Me
Rugby’s golden boy … yes. Golden boy elsewhere? Not always. Holt has some skeletons in his closet. We all do.
Tommy
True that, Hellion.
Me
Are you still bringing dessert with you? Holt and I just finished our entrées, so that will be perfect timing.
Tommy
Dessert for you and Holt is in hand. My dessert is already there.
Me
I am not having sexual relations with you while my brother is staying here.
Tommy
I cannot believe he’s sleeping on that sofa bed for four nights. He’s crazy. One night, and I needed to call an emergency chiropractor.
Me
Go complain to those who decided to pay female pro soccer players next to nothing.
Tommy
Oh, I will. I’m going to join social media for that reason alone. My first post will be how gross I think it is. You girls work so damn hard.
Me
Flattery will get you everywhere.
Tommy
Even between your thighs tonight?
Me
Don’t push it, Tommy.
Tommy
I love it when you’re mean to me. It just makes me want to fuck you harder.
“Jen,” Holt announces from behind me, “do not tell me, now that all the stores are closed, that we have no dessert on Christmas Day.”
Setting my phone down on the foldable table we’re using as a makeshift dinner table for today, I rise from the chair and come to sit at one of the barstools facing my tiny kitchen.
My brother looks happy, healthy, and in better shape than I’ve seen him in a long time, maybe even ever. I hope that the happy part will stick around after I tell him that we do, in fact, have a dessert and it is, in fact, being hand-delivered by his favorite person.
“We have dessert,” I reply.
He looks around, scratching at the back of his neck.
Just like Tommy, Holt in my apartment is kind of comical.
Like a giant moving around a doll’s house.
Everything is so tiny in my one-bed, and Holt is huge in every way possible.
As a fly-half, he also has to be agile and the brains of the team, the playmaker literally calling the shots.
“Is it a magical dessert that’s suddenly going to appear, or should I make one up? You actually have proper food in your fridge for once, so I could definitely put something together.”
Picking up my wineglass, I smile around the rim. The only reason I have proper food these days is thanks to the boy due to arrive anytime.
I take a sip and set the glass back down on the breakfast bar, making a split-second decision that now is as good of a time as any to tell Holt about Tommy. Waiting until he walks through the door might not be my best move.
I clear my throat. “Actually, can I talk to you about something?”
Holt narrows his eyes at me playfully, undoing another button on his white dress shirt. “If it’s about how high you run the heating in this place, then sure.”
Sliding off the stool and grabbing my wine, I walk across to the couch and take a seat, tucking one leg beneath me. “My cheap-ass landlord finally replaced the furnace. He didn’t relish the idea of being sued for freezing his tenants to death.”
Holt huffs out a laugh and flops down into the chair on my left. “No. He’s going to boil them and their visitors instead.”
Glancing quickly at my watch, I know Tommy could arrive at any second. With the way he drives and with hardly any traffic on the roads today, I know it won’t take him a half hour to get here—fifteen minutes, tops.
I flick my eyes up to Holt, who’s busy typing something on his phone before he sets it down on the coffee table in front of him and gives me his full attention.
“I know you were joking about dessert magically appearing, but …” I tuck some hair behind my ear, fidgeting. “It actually will. Any minute now.”
Holt cocks his head to the side in question.
“My boyfriend is bringing it over to eat with us.”
I feel my entire body flush with heat as Holt’s jaw pops open.
“You didn’t tell me you were seeing someone, Jen.”
He looks mildly hurt, and that’s the last thing I wanted. He’s going to be even more upset when he discovers who my mystery guy is.
“I wanted to wait until I could tell you in the flesh.”
It’s like Holt puts all the pieces together in the time it takes me to sip my wine.
He must know that Tommy never got traded in the end, although he’s never once mentioned anything to me since he messaged me about it.
And he’s right to be shocked about me keeping secrets.
We never do. Not unless we suspect the other might hate what we have to say.
When my smart doorbell sounds, I genuinely don’t think the timing could be worse.
Holt leaps from his chair and storms toward my hallway, swallowing up the distance to my front door in three large strides.
He slides the dead bolt and yanks the door open, practically pulling it from its hinges.
Like the ultimate face-off, Tommy stands on the other side of the door, holding the pecan and maple pie he promised he’d make me since it’s my favorite dessert of all time.
I rush to catch up to Holt as Tommy takes a single step back.
Holt’s dark brown eyes are black, painted with fury. “What the fuck is he doing here, Jenna?” He drops his attention to the pie in Tommy’s hands. “And why is he here with our favorite dessert?”
Dropping my face into my hands, I exhale a slow breath. “Holt, this is Tommy. My boyfriend.”
“I know who he is,” Holt bites out. “The last time I met him, he insulted my sister for telling him to take a hike and almost broke my jaw.”
In retreat, Tommy takes another small step away from Holt, one hand coming up in front of him. “I came here today to talk. I want to set the records straight between us.”
Holt’s shoulders drop a quarter of an inch from where they were bunched around his ears. He turns his head to look at me, a brief flash of hurt passing over his features. “Why are you mixed up with this asshole? You are worth so much more than him.”
Back when I first met Tommy, Holt’s statement—while only coming from a place of care and protection for me—would double as a red rag to a bull for my boyfriend. But as I look up at Tommy, I see hurt on his face, too, and my heart sinks into my stomach.
“Can we at least all go inside so we don’t run the risk of making a scene out here?” I suggest. “Every neighbor is at home today, and they’re probably already listening.”
Holt crosses his arms over his chest, one challenging brow raised. “The only person incapable of controlling their temper around here is him.” He nods his head at Tommy.
I place my hand on Holt’s upper arm. He’s so used to protecting me, although he doesn’t need to in this moment. I can’t say that I blame him. I’d do the exact same thing if this was over a girl who had a history of hurting him and me.
“Hear him out, Holt. Please.”
When he steps to one side, I breathe a sigh of relief.
Holt’s hands slide into his pockets, and Tommy takes a couple of strides into my apartment, closing the door behind him.
He hasn’t taken his eyes off mine, and when I reach across and take the pie from his arms, I feel the way he brushes his fingers against mine.
He wants to reassure me that everything is going to be okay.
Turning on my heel, I make for the kitchen and set the pie on the breakfast bar, a wave of emotion crashing into me when silence descends on the apartment. The boys aren’t exchanging a word, and I have no clue how to fix this.
A few months ago, the thought of alienating my brother over a guy was unthinkable. Unfathomable. Holt and I are a team, and we always will be. But today, the thought of losing either of the men standing in my hallway from my life consumes me with fear.
The fear sits there, manifesting in the pit of my gut until I can no longer stand the aching pressure, and I head back up the hallway, stalking toward them both.
Holt’s eyes flare wide at the sight of me—and Tommy’s aren’t dissimilar.
“I need you to give Tommy a chance, Holt. I know what happened back in January was wrong, but he isn’t the piece of trash you think he is.”
Tommy swipes a palm across his jawline. I can see the wheels turning in his head on what to say.
A couple of beats pass before Holt shrugs his shoulders, exasperated. “Well, if the dude’s changed and he’s somehow become a good person for my baby sister, then I’m certainly not hearing anything from him to prove it.”
“Words are cheap.” Tommy’s deep voice cuts through the tension.
He motions to my brother with his hand. “I could stand here, in my girl’s apartment on Christmas Day, and tell you all the ways I’m sorry for what I did that night back in January.
That I’m sorry for hurting her on multiple occasions and for being the biggest asshole on planet Earth.
” Tommy drops his eyes to the floor, scuffing it lightly with his sneaker.
He shakes his head, and I can tell it’s from memories of himself.
“A few words aren’t going to cut it though, are they?
” He centers his attention solely on my brother.
Holt frowns. “Probably not, no.”
Tommy nods his head lightly, like he knew that fact all along.
“Good. I’m glad they wouldn’t—because they wouldn’t for me if I had a sibling and their new partner had behaved in the ways I have.
” Tommy presses his palms together in a prayer-like manner as he edges toward my brother, eyes boring deep into Holt’s.
“So, let me show you how much I love Jenna. I know we don’t have much time before you return to Europe, but give me a chance and watch the way I worship the ground that she walks on.
I have zero excuses other than I’ve not had the easiest life, but neither has Jenna, and I know shit has been tough for you too. ”
I watch the way Holt swallows thickly. My brother is a sensitive guy, playing in a sport that demands nothing but respect between teammates and from the opposition. He’s listening to Tommy, and I’m so damn proud of them both right now.
Pride is a difficult pill to swallow, as is bitterness.
“Your sister has changed my life; even if she didn’t realize she was doing it, she was.
Sometimes, we’re so blinded by our own agenda that we forget to stop and listen to other people and admit when we’re wrong.
I was wrong to lash out at you that day, Holt.
I let my ego get the better of me. All I’m asking you to do is watch me as I build the bridges that only I am responsible for burning. ”
Tommy turns to look at me, reaching out and taking one of my hands in his. He intertwines our fingers, and suddenly, I’m having really inappropriate thoughts involving sports bras, zippers, and this very hallway we’re standing in.
“Jenna told me that pecan pie is her favorite and it’s yours too.” Tommy smirks down at me. “And since she hates cooking, I figured I could stop by and bring you one I’d made.”
Holt stands motionless. He wasn’t expecting any of that from Tommy. It takes him a good few seconds to reply, and I’d trade anything to know his thoughts.
“Sure. Let’s go eat,” he finally confirms. “Why not?”
Holt spins on his heel to make for the kitchen when Tommy lands a hand on his shoulder, asking him to wait a second.
My brother turns back to him.
“Jenna tells me that you don’t leave Brooklyn for another couple of days and that you like a bit of hockey.
” He reaches into his back pocket. “When I was younger, my mom always said that ice-level seats beat any corporate-box bullshit you could buy.” Fetching out three tickets, he holds them out to Holt.
“So, I went ahead and secured three seats for our home game against the Scorpions. The third one is for my mom, Helen. She will be there, and I know she’d really like to meet you.
” He smiles at me, the corners of his eyes crinkling with warmth.
“She’s practically vibrating to meet the woman I love. ”
Holt’s large hand wraps around the tickets. I haven’t seen paper tickets in a long while, and I love that Tommy got them for us.
Rolling his lips together, Holt stares down at the seat row and number. “These are hot property.” He lifts his head to Tommy. “Sure. Count me in.”