Chapter 18
Ledger
Kaisa’s still upset. She was last night, and she is again at our rehearsal today.
Maybe “upset” isn’t the right word. She’s distant. Brusque.
I spent hours last night practicing possible interview questions with the PR team at the Wolves headquarters, and, as a result, Good Morning, San Antonio went well. The interviewer focused mostly on the charity arm of the Wolves, and on the season so far. Nothing I couldn’t handle.
Afterwards, I went to a morning workout with the team and then took an extended lunch break—with the full support of Coach Whittaker—and met Kaisa at the dance studio.
But even though we’re alone here in this space, it’s like she’s a million miles away. There’s a wedge between us, and she’s all business.
“Watch your left knee here.” She points to my offending joints.
“It’s like this.” She does sort of a body roll and swings her foot around, smoothly, expertly, then she does it again, more slowly this time, exaggerating the bent standing leg.
“See the difference? There’s a softness right there. ” She jabs a finger at my knee.
I try to copy her, but it’s no use. “There’s a lot my body can do,” I tease. “But this move isn’t one of them.” I’m going for lightheartedness because, if I don’t, despair could very easily set in.
Despair over the distance I feel between Kaisa and me.
“Not if you talk like that.” She glares at me. “You have to watch your words, Ledger.”
The way she says my name? I can’t explain it, just that I can hear her Finnish accent better when she says it. I like how my name sounds on her lips.
I give a resolute nod, my gaze searing into hers. “Got it. I can and will do this move.”
Her mouth perks up in half a smile. “That’s better. Now from the top.”
We begin. Sometimes, she stops coaching and counting and just goes with the flow. And sometimes, if we’re really lucky, I’m actually able to make it through the dance with minimal damage.
“You smell good,” she says with a relaxed smile when the dance is nearing the end. It’s a whisper, almost like it wasn’t meant for me to hear.
“Courtesy of the showers at the stadium.”
She straightens, snapping out of it so quickly, it leaves my head spinning.
She frowns. “I shouldn’t have…” Her eyes squeeze closed.
“Uh, let’s go over the last couple of eight counts again.
” Meeting my gaze, her posture aligns back to a place of detachment.
“That New Yorker, side step, and then the flourish.”
I don’t know what her sudden stiffness is about, but I’ll respect her need to focus on the dance right now.
After we go over it a couple more times, she nods. “That’s it for now. You’ve got to get back to the stadium.”
I check the clock on the wall. She’s right. I’m going to be late getting back, but still, I don’t want to leave her.
“What will you do the rest of the afternoon?” I hate that she just has to hang around by herself.
“I have online meetings the rest of the day. There’s always so much going on with the show.”
“So, tonight? Can we meet back here when I’m finished?”
She shakes her head. “The dance studio is having an event here tonight, so there aren’t any available rooms.”
“There’s gotta be another studio around here,” I offer. “Or you could come to my house. I have a large enough kitchen.”
There’s a tension in her gaze, like she’s considering it, but unsure.
She clears her throat. “I don’t think that’s wise. We shouldn’t—” Her phone starts ringing, and when she picks it up, her face goes from unsure to a hardened mask—all business. “It’s Wynn’s assistant. I’d better answer. And you’d better go.”
“If you change your mind about tonight…”
“It’s okay. Take the night off and then you’ll be ready for your costume fitting in Winterbrook tomorrow afternoon.
” She pauses as she answers the call. Then, after a brief conversation with Wynn’s assistant, she puts the phone on speaker and sets it back on the floor.
“She connected me over to Wynn, but it takes him a while to pick up.”
“I’d love to show you my neighborhood. It’s nothing like Indiana, but it’s still nice.” I just want to spend more time with her, try to smooth things over.
“It’s not a good idea,” she says, firmly. “I’ll see you back in Winterbrook tomorrow afternoon, okay? I have an early flight in the morning. Besides, you need to rest. Get some good sleep. The next couple of days are going to be killer.”
I nod.
“You’re still coming back tomorrow, right?” she asks. “I’ve scheduled you with the costumers at four.”
I nod again. “I wouldn’t miss it.”
She gives me a dubious look. She knows how crazy my schedule is.
I’m going to do everything I can to make this work. To make this performance amazing and my time with her perfect.
Because I know I don’t want to say goodbye when this is over. And with a sinking feeling, after the way I’ve behaved, I get the impression she’s ready to.