Chapter 16
Gage
My goddess comes to me, trembling with uncertainty and maybe even fear.
I want to wash away her apprehension, but as she drops to her knees in front of me, her shaking hands at my jeans, I notice that she slams her legs together, and when she does, she rubs her thighs, as though trying to banish the ache burning there, deep within the center of her, and I realize that maybe those vibrations aren’t all fear.
I want to touch her more than anything, to do a thousand filthy things to her, to throw her onto that bed and spread her thighs and dive between them, to dine on her cunt for the rest of the night, until I’ve broken her fear like a fucking fairy tale prince breaks some curse.
I’d flip her over after, and eat her delicious ass until she came a few more times, before I’d ever even think of having her ride my cock.
While she doesn’t appear skittish as her hands quickly undo the button at my jeans and my fly gives way after, I know that she’s new to this. All of this. That her first time, fuck, her only time, was a time she can’t remember, with a bastard thief who stole from her and maimed her.
I want to touch her, to cup her breasts and suck on her sweet, pert nipples.
To watch her moan and writhe with every flick of my tongue.
I want to pinch her and nip her before I go on to worship the rest of her gorgeous, goddess form.
Those shapely limbs, the sweet curl of her hips, her flat belly, and her swollen heat.
I want it all, but I know that one touch could ruin her.
One touch could shatter and destroy her, so I’ll let her explore me instead.
I’ll give her that power, the power to see and touch what no other person has ever discovered.
Not that I’m some fucking prize, but this is what we both need.
Two damaged people.
Survivors of the most brutal violence. We bear the scars of our past, the shame and the horror and the guilt, all wrapped up into nightmares and memories we wish we could erase from our minds.
Ami’s eyes widen in surprise when she realizes that I have an undying hatred for underwear of any kind.
Then sucks in a harsh breath, but her hands don’t stop.
She explores me, carefully pushing my jeans away from my hips, over my ass, her warm hands on my scarred flesh enough to make me want to shoot my load right there.
I grind my teeth to powder and just hope that the ache in my balls isn’t actually enough to kill me. I’d like to have more control than a horny thirteen year old.
I’m so fucking hard that when I glance down at her and find her electric eyes sparking back up at me, I also stare straight at the head of my cock, which is sticking straight up, even with my jeans still half on.
I don’t help her. I don’t move a muscle, even though I feel like someone opened up my skin and stuffed electric prods below the surface.
I let her take her time. I let her hands explore me, so tentative and shy that my cock throbs with every single movement and my nerve endings turn to white hot fire.
Ami works my jeans the rest of the way down my legs. I step from them for her, and let her place them carefully aside after, like that denim is made of gold and not old and worn out and stained with motor oil and grease.
She falters back after, resting on her heels, crouched before me, taking all of me in.
Her eyes roam hotly over my limbs, a burning caress that makes my balls tighten.
Somehow, just that slow perusal is the sexiest thing that I’ve ever seen.
My cock agrees, bobbing violently as it stands straight against my stomach.
“Would you like to touch me?” I make my voice hard, so that she can’t tell just how fucking hard it is for me to stand there like I am. With every single scar and mar on display. I’ve never bared myself to another person.
Ami’s head jerks up and those obsidian orbs meet mine. She doesn’t hesitate before she inclines her head. Even though she downplays the raw desire, I see it burning in her eyes, naked and unfettered.
She stumbles forward until she’s kneeling before me again.
Slowly, she reaches out and grazes her fingers down the striated muscle of my thigh.
It’s not what I thought she’d choose to caress, and those tiny fingertips splayed against my leg are somehow more sexual than if she’d grabbed my dick in her fist and pumped it.
I stand stock still, trying to drag air into my lungs, which feel like they’ve collapsed, when Ami leans in. She rests her face against the juncture of my thigh and pelvis, bends her head and inhales.
It should be fucking weird.
It’s the exact opposite.
Her inhaling my masculine scent in the rawest of places, makes my cock ache so fucking badly that I nearly take my own fist to it, just to relieve the pressure.
Ami beats me to it. She raises her head and slowly, so slow that she should be awarded a degree in torture, trails her fingers up my thigh, past my balls—which make them clench like a motherfucker—to my cock.
Her sweet, warm palm is like heaven.
No, it’s better. I’ve never held out any illusions about getting to those pearly gates, on the off chance that they are indeed real. Ami is as close to any kind of heaven, or afterlife, or even pleasure, that I’ve ever come.
Her hand slowly works my cock, starting at the base and twisting gently towards the tip, which is angry and red and nearly fucking purple. She lets out a stunned little gasp when drops of precum form at the slit and dribble over her fist.
I’ve never been with anyone inexperienced, and Ami’s wide eyed wonder at the tiniest of things, her frank appreciation of my body, hard and marred and ruined as it is, make me feel things that I have no business feeling.
It makes me feel strangely soft inside, like someone took out all the steel and granite that I’ve grown so used to and replaced it with spongy moss.
Ami runs her hand down my shaft again, working me the best she can, given that her palm barely closes around the girth of my cock, and I let out a smoky groan that swirls around us. Her breath hitches, but she does it again—tortures me with that sweet little palm.
“Is this… is this okay?” she whispers, and I realize that I’m supposed to be instructing her, not acting like a fourteen year old kid experiencing his first hand job. “I want to taste you…”
Fuck. Me. With. Barbed. Wire.
It would have been no less painful than her innocent request.
“Yeah,” I manage to force out, and Jesus, it sounds like I’ve eaten an entire fence of barbed wire instead.
“Take me into that sweet, pouty mouth. I want to watch my cock disappearing between your pretty lips. I want to tangle my fingers in that lush hair of yours and guide your beautiful face until my cock is at the back of your throat. Is that what you want too, Ami? To take me there?”
I wait, sure that was too much. I want to take the words back, to break her in slow, to give her time to adjust to the idea, because sucking a man’s dick on her knees, me working her mouth, is probably a degrading image in her mind after what she’s been through, but she surprises me as savage desire wars with determination, hardening her features.
“Yes,” she responds, and her voice is sure and strong. “Yes, I want that. I want you. I want to taste you. I want to… to please you.”
“You please me just by existing,” I say stupidly, and nearly punch myself in the face for being such a chick and spouting that nonsense.
The pretty blush that blooms over her delicate cheekbones and the way her tongue darts out over her pillowy bottom lip, makes those words worth it. Every single second.
Her cheeks still painted a brilliant red, Ami tilts her head and leans forward.
I have to admit, it’s one hell of a show from where I’m standing, watching her guide my cock to her mouth.
Her lush lips part and she takes the crown of my dick between them.
She sucks me in slow, savoring me like I’m her favorite lollipop.
I wait, trying desperately not to jack my hips into her face like an asshole and fuck her mouth the way I want to.
Her eyelashes flicker down and she lets out a hum of pleasure that I feel straight in my balls. She guides me deeper, sucking harder, and I imagine her mouth as something else and my hips surge forward, without meaning to.
I’m about to tell her that I’m a douchebag and I’m sorry, but she hums low in her throat again and takes me even further back, until I hit the back of her throat.
She almost chokes, but pulls back in time, but pushes me back again.
She swallows hard, exploring, pushing her limits, and I see stars.
I’m pretty sure she’s never done this before, and she’s taking me down like a seasoned pro, and fuck, it’s all I can do not to twist my fingers through her hair and jerk her head back and forth on my dick until I burst.
She pulls back, torturing me while she explores me with her tongue.
She swirls it over the length of me before tracing the underside all the way to my crown.
She sucks me into her mouth again, but only so she can roll sweet circles over my head with her tongue.
She moans and pulls back, and when she looks up at me, the wonderment on her face nearly slays me.
“You taste… good. Salty and a little bit bitter, but it’s… I like it.”
Her eyes flick back down to the floor and I can’t take it. I push my thumb under her chin, cradling her face as I tilt it back up to me. “There isn’t any shame in enjoying this. In bringing each other pleasure in whatever ways we both enjoy.”
“I know. I just…” she hesitates, her lips working soundlessly.
“I just… it makes me feel… I thought it would make me feel dirty, doing this. Wrong. Degraded. I don’t know.
I thought- but it’s… I feel weird. When I touch you, it’s like you’re touching me there.
It makes me feel powerful. Does that make sense or is that stupid? ”